Ghosts Of The Past
You walked over to the table where Nadeem and some of the others were still sitting. They seemed to be pretty sober. Probably because they still got to go to work tomorrow. Some other agents were leaving as well.
You grabbed your coat of the chair where you had put it when you arrived. “(y/n), you leaving?” Nadeem looks up at you and you nod to him.
“Yeah. I want to be able to get up with a clear head tomorrow. And i'll need my sleep for that.”
“You're right, guess I should be heading home too.” he tells you as he shoves his chair back.
“Guys, we should probably call it a night. I still need you all to be focused tomorrow.” Nadeem said and the agents reluctantly agreed on that. “I hope you had fun.” he says and his eyes went to look between you and Dex.
A smile grew on your face as you walked over to Nadeem holding out your hand “I did. This was a great idea, Nadeem.” he looked at you gratefull as he shook your hand.
You turned back to Dex who was waiting at the door, he opened it for you and you raised a brow at him. “Look at you, being a gentleman.” you jokingly said as you slapped the back of your hand playful against his chest.
You stepped outside and he followed you. “Where did you park it ?” he looked around.
You motioned to your car “Right over there, across the street.” looking out for traffic before you crossed the street with him. You took a quick glance through the window of your car to check the back seat. He saw you look and furrowed his brow “What? Something wrong?”.
You shook your head. It probably looked weird when you did that but your past made you very wary. He was waiting for your answer.
“I just like to check if there is no one in the back of my car, have you never watched a horror movie?”
He thought for a moment before a small smile grew on his face “That's a smart thing to do.” he tells you as he unlocks the car “And yes, I have watched horror movies.”
You walked over to the other side as he got in at the driver's side. You got in and put on your seatbelt, shooting him a look that said you better put that thing on or so help me god.
He saw the look on your face and grinned as he clicked his seatbelt on without protesting.
The car started and he looked at you “So, where are we heading?” he says as he looked in the rear view mirror for a moment as well.
You gave him your address, you didn't live very far from the bar. Wondering if he lived close to you or the bar considering he must have walked here or perhaps taken a cab.
“Dex?” your voice drew his attention as he drove.
“Yeah?”
“Do you live close to the bar? I didn't see your car parked outside.”
He focused on the road as he spoke “No, but I parked it around the corner back there. You don't live far from the bar though, I run farther distances then that.” he noted.
“I don't. But you still wanted to drive me home.” a smile playing on your lips “So, you run a lot?”
He nods “Yeah, it helps me stay focused. You ?”
You laughed before you shook your head “Me? No. I'm not that good of a runner. That's why i'm a good fighter. I mean, if I can't outrun them I will have to fight them.”
“Nadeem told me how good you could fight. Told me to never piss you off.” Dex looks at you and shoots you a lopsided grin. “He said people in your previous unit believed you were some sort of ninja. Where did you learn how to fight like that?” he questioned and you nervously held on to your seatbelt.
Not knowing how to really answer, you did not want to lie to him. But you knew you could not tell him the truth either. What were you supposed to say? That you learned it while beating up thugs while covering your face so no one would recognize you? How your ex-boyfriend, Daredevil himself, teached you how to fight better?
You had to protect Matt's identity, and what Daredevil does is not actually legal either. So telling Dex, an FBI agent, that you know who the devil of hell's kitchen was didn't seem like the best idea.
“I uhm..” you nervously rubbed your hand on your coat and sighed “I taught myself in the beginning, after a while someone saw me practicing and asked me if I wanted to practice with other people. It was not an official club or anything, just some people teaching others. Most of them were there to learn how to defend themselves after something happened to them. I guess it was a sort of therapy to us.”
Dex was parking the car and you saw you had arrived at your home. He turned the keys and the engine stopped.
He was lost in thought for a moment as silence filled the small space of the car.
You looked over at him and he looked like he wanted to say something. You waited for him to speak.
“I had a therapist when I was young.” he suddenly says and fumbled with the keys in his hands.
He looked in your eyes and you made sure to show that you were not judging him about what he just told you. It gave him the push to continue speaking.
“I uh..” his hand dropped to his knee, thinking of how to tell you this, hoping he wouldn't frighten you “I had to see Dr. Mercer because of what I did when I was a kid.” he says as he rubs his face with his other hand.
“You don't have to tell me if you don't feel ready to tell me, Dex.” your voice was soft “But whatever it is, I need you to know that I will listen if you need me to.”
He let out a sigh of relief, as he looked at you “I threw a baseball at my coach, (y/n).”
“Dex..” you closed your eyes as you realised what he was trying to tell you.
“I killed him.” his voice was quiet. “I went to Dr. Mercer for years. Until she became i'll. She passed away.”
He had expect you to run, to bolt out of the car after he told you the truth. He know he could lose you because of it.
He saw how you didn't have any intention of leaving the car, instead you were listening. Listening to him, because you knew he needed that. You knew because once you were in the same situation, but you had no one to turn to then, for you there was no therapy because no one cared.
"She told me my moral compass wasn't broken. I just need a northstar to guide me."
He rubbed his knee nervously.
"Northstar?" You asked him.
He gives you a half-smile "Yeah, uhm.. someone to guide me, to keep me on the straight and narrow path."
“And do you? I mean, do you have someone or something to guide you ?” you kept your voice soft as you saw how nervous he was telling you all this.
A smile tugged at his lips “Yeah. Yeah I do. I have these tapes, recordings from my sessions with her and..” he swallowed not finishing his sentence as his looked down at the keys in his hands.
You didn't want to pry the answer or the rest out of him, it would be pushing him and that was the last thing you wanted to do after he had trusted you with this. You unbuckled your seatbelt, as you let it all sink in for a moment. You put your hand on his shoulder before you looked at him, he looked at your hand on his shoulder and relaxed. “I'm sure she would be very proud seeing you now. I mean, look at you.” you say as you waved your hand over him. “Special Agent Benjamin Poindexter. You save people, Dex. You manage to do that after everything that has happened in your life. She would have been so proud, I know I am.” his eyes looked up at you as you said that.
“Dex, I need you to know that whatever happens I'll always be here for you. Whenever you need someone to listen, Okay?”
His eyes locked on yours and he carefully held your hand that was on his shoulder. Rubbing your thumb over his shoulder. “Thank you, (y/n).”
“I should be heading inside.” you let go of his shoulder as you felt tension rise between the both of you. He cleared his troat “Yeah. And I should get back to my car.” he unbuckled his seatbelt and waited until you moved out of your car first. He walked to you and handed you back your keys.
“Do you want me to call you a cab? i'll pay the fee.” you quickly ask him.
He shook his head. “Nah, i'll just walk back. Like I said, I run further than that when I work out.”
“No wonder you look so good.” it rolled out of your mouth before you could prevent it. And you mentally slapped yourself as a blush creeped onto your cheeks.
His eyes widened as he processed what you just blurted out and smirked “Sorry, I didn't quite catch that?” he said and you knew there was no way he didn't hear you clearly.
You crossed your arms as you turned to him “I said, no wonder you look so good. But you know that.”
He chuckled “I do. I just love to hear you say it.”
“Damn you, Dex.” you groaned, but you couldn't help but smile.
You walked to your door, unlocking it before turning back to him.
“I had fun tonight. I'll see you tomorrow at work, right?” your voice hopefull.
He nodded “Definitely. Wouldn't want you to get bored.”
You took a step closer to him “Goodnight, Dex.” you say before you placed a quick kiss on his cheek. His face flushed and you gave him a selfpleased smirk before walking inside.
“Goodnight (y/n).” he said when he finally regained his senses but you had already gone inside.