Chapter 14
"Ser Erryk?" Her son's sworn shield stood at attention outside his chambers, "Has he come out at all?"
The knight shook his head, "'fraid not, Princess. The only good news I can give is that the Prince accepted food from the kitchens. Though I cannot say if he had any of it,"
Rhaenyra sighed as Ser Erryk knocked on the door to announce her to Lucerys. There was a long moment before the chamber door opened a crack and her son's face appeared.
His eyes were red and puffy as tears tracked down his face, his hair was wild and stuck out in different directions, and his night shift was rumpled. The more Rhaenyra looked, the more she realized her son had not slept at all the night before,
"He's here?" Luke asked and she nodded, "Do I have to see him?"
"Not if you do not want to," He tightened his grip on the wood before stepping back into the room, leaving the door open in a silent invitation for his mother to enter.
Rhaenyra stepped in and Ser Erryk shut the door behind her. She saw a platter of fruit sitting untouched on a side table, the warming chambers resting near the fire, her granddaughters' cribs sitting across from them, but no babes inside.
Another sweep around the room showed Aenyra and Aemma in the center of the half-built nest on Lucerys' bed. Both were awake and laying on their backs, wriggling and cooing while waving their little hands around as Lucerys crawled back into the nest and curled around them.
Rhaenyra pulled one of the sitting chairs over and sat beside the bed, watching as both girls instantly reached for their kepa. She watched as he allowed them to grab and pull at his fingers, giggling when he wiggled them in their small fists,
"They woke up when Vhagar landed," He murmured, "Neither cried, just laughed. As if they knew who had come," Luke curled tighter around the girls, as if that would protect them from the mess their sire had caused.
Both Rhaenyra and Lucerys watched as the two babes tried keeping ahold of the Omega's fingers until he said,
"They deserve more than what I can give them," Rhaenyra turned to her son as worry filled her when she heard his empty tone, "I've only left this room once since returning to Dragonstone and, and felt like I was getting better, but then I heard Vhagar and..."
Luke shut his eyes and curled his arm around his girls as his voice became wet,
"And now I'm afraid he'll either, barge his way in like he did at the Keep, or, find a way to enter silently, without me noticing. That, I'll wake up and see him sitting in the dark, waiting for me to acknowledge that he's there..." The Prince glanced over his shoulder, his gaze falling past his mother to land on the empty hearth.
Luke's eyes trailed over the shadows forming in the morning light as if he expected Aemond to materialize out of them before turning back to his daughters.
Each had a small hand on his fingers, still tugging with their uncoordinated limbs as they stopped laughing. Both pups always seemed to know when their kepa was upset, and in turn, they would become upset.
When he heard his daughters begin to whine, Luke sat up and scooted against the headboard. He still grimaced with pain at the movement, but Luke managed to settle the twins in his lap. They quieted down and began curling his shift in their tiny hands.
But, even when his daughters were happy, there was always this, underlying sadness in his eyes. His normal scent of lemons and cream had returned, but there was a constant sour undertone that had Rhaenyra worried.
She desperately wished she could take all her son's despair and carry it for him.
Rhaenyra wanted to tear away the sadness and fear that continually clouded Lucerys' eyes and toss it into the sea.
But she could not. She could only stand at his side and help him in any way she could,
"They need more than these four walls," He murmured, "But I don't- I can't leave without-" Luke cut off and bit his lip.
Tears welled in his eyes, but Luke quickly wiped them away before they could fall on either of his girls and continued,
"And now Aemond's here. He's already tried inserting himself into their lives with the dragon eggs without saying anything for almost a month. What else is he going to do? What else does he think he's entitled to?" Luke sucked in a breath and tightened his grip on the girls, "Once he finds out they haven't had their first flight, he will try to take that too! Especially since that is something I cannot give them,"
Rhaenyra reached for her son as he whispered that last thing and took his hands in her own, smiling as the twins latched onto her fingers,
"Aemond will take nothing more from you-"
"You can't promise that," Luke whispered but she continued,
"He will take nothing more from you! No one here will let him. And unless you say otherwise he will have nothing to do with your children,"
"But the King-"
"The King may threaten me until his face turns blue. I have already allowed Aemond on Dragonstone because of his orders, but when it comes to Aenyra and Aemma, my brother will need to wait until he earns the right to be near them," She gently cupped his face, "And it will be up to you if he ever earns it," Lucerys leaned into his mother's grasp as the pups cooed.
At some point, Rhaenyra found herself curled around her son as he curled around his daughters after they had nursed and drifted to sleep.
Lucerys was running his fingers over Aemma's curls before carefully tracing Aenyra's nose. He repeated the motions over and over again as Rhaenyra kept one arm around him and her other hand resting against her slowly growing bump.
The Crown Princess held her two children close as the sun moved overhead, making the shadows change around the room as Lucerys continued to stare at his daughters,
"I cannot give them their first flight," Lucerys murmured, "Even if I were to wait until I was well enough to ride Arrax, I would not trust myself to take them,"
"Luke-"
"I cannot give them their first flight. But I will not hand them over to Aemond," The young Omega looked over his shoulder at his mother, "I- When he finds out he will no doubt ask to take them,"
Rhaenyra squeezed his hand as he went quiet again and asked, "Who would you trust to take them? Who do you want to take them?"
Lucerys didn't answer at first as he turned back to his daughters. He watched the two pups sleep, splaying his hand across their tiny bodies as they dreamed,
"You. And Daemon. Or Jace. I just... I wish this was something I could give them. This one thing! And I cannot give it!" Luke whispered as his voice became wet and thick with tears, "Why can I not give them anything?"
Rhaenyra tightened her grip on her son as she sat up and took his face in her hands,
"You have given them your love,"
He only stared at her, tears still rolling down his cheeks as he quietly asked,
"Have I?"
"You have, Lucerys. You have carried them, given them life, named them, and protected them. Those are all signs of your love for Aenyra and Aemma," Rhaenyra wiped the tears off of Luke's face,
"But is that enough? Am I giving them enough?" He pushed her hands away and carefully crawled out of the nest.
Lucerys limped over to the chair by the warming chambers and gripped the back as Rhaenyra followed him,
"I want them safe. I want them protected. I want them away from Aemond. But there's this..." He trailed off and dropped his head as his shoulders began to shake, "I cannot give them what they deserve!" Luke sobbed and nearly fell to the floor.
Rhaenyra caught him and placed him in the chair as he continued to cry. She tried calming Lucerys, tried wiping away his tears, but he gently pushed her hands away,
"Please I just... May I be alone, please?" The Princess was hesitant to leave her son, but he continued to plead with apologies mixed in between.
So, Rhaenyra reluctantly nodded and pulled away.
She carefully lifted her granddaughters from the nest and put them in their cribs.
After placing a kiss on Lucerys' forehead and whispering that if he needed something to let her know, Rhaenyra stepped out of the room and began walking down the hall as Ser Erryk shut the door behind her.
Neither mentioned the muffled sobs that came from the closed door.