@ChrisEvans
Dear All Technology,
Remember the 90’s when you just WORKED??? I don’t need a ‘smart’ feature on my TV, thermostat, lights, music, refrigerator, security cameras, and f-ing car. You’re a major pain in all of our asses. You’re not worth it.
Signed,
Everyone
“No you fucking car! Stop talking! I’m not fucking turning at that street, you dumbass,” Steve complains to the AI in his car.
Peter looks over at Beverly his lips pressed thin before he bursts out laughing. She joins in but covers her mouth and hangs her head.
“Fuck! Why is this street closed?! FRIDAY! Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Pops, umm…” Beverly starts hesitantly not wanting him to focus his anger on her.
“What?”
“I uh…need to stop at the store. I need a poster board for my project. And some markers and things.”
“Right now?”
“Yeah I uh…need to start it tonight.”
“Dammit. You know the store is in the other direction. You couldn’t say something earlier?”
“I just thought about it.”
“Of course you did.”
******
Steve, Peter, and Beverly wait in the self check-out line for an available one. Steve leads them to one and holds out his hand to take the items from his daughter. She holds them against her chest.
“Pops! I can scan it myself!”
He grabs the box of markers out of her hand and mumbles something about not having time. That one scans easy enough but the tri-fold poster board is another story. He can’t seem to find the barcode on it.
“It’s right there,” Peter points out and Steve finally scans it correctly. The machine is not happy about how it is placed in the bagging area. Peter sneaks by Steve as he attempts different positions in the bagging area and presses the button about not bagging the item. Finally they are at the part where you pay.
Steve pulls out his wallet and removes a debit card. He inserts the chip, crosses his arms and waits.
“You have to press the button for payment,” Beverly whines getting impatient about how long they’ve been at the check-out.
“I don’t have to press anything,” Steve says as he turns towards her. Peter uses the opportunity to sneak by and press the button. Steve turns back towards it and see the prompt for debit or credit. He presses for credit and waits. The credit machine asks them to take the card out and swipe it instead.
“Why would I do that? It has a chip.”
“Run it as credit,” Peter says.
The cashier walks over to him them. “Sir, you need to run it as credit or swipe it.”
“That’s not how bananas work,” Beverly whispers in Peter’s ear as they watch their father argue with the cashier. It was one their inside jokes they liked to use when they witnessed someone doing something wrong.
Eventually the manager comes over and offers to check them out at the service desk.
As they’re leaving the store. Peter remembers he forgot something. “Pops. I actually need to get something, can we go back in?”
Steve stops walking as Beverly keeps going not even pausing for a second. “I’m going to wait by the car.”