Sparks Fly

"Now hold still." Nurse Annie instructed. "It might still sting a little."

A premonition come true. Once the alcohol dripped cloth tapped at his arm, Kurt hissed and his tail clenched tight to his side. The electric shock that hit him wasn't fatal, the force of the blast had only stunned him and gave him a temporary headache as consequence. The only exception being his right arm that now had a small burn across the bottom and down to his wrist.

Nurse Annie and Hank reassured him everything was in order and the burn would fade, it was only because he had been flat on an old, worn, wooden porch outside that Annie insisted the wound be disinfected before hand.

The length of time taken just to secure a cold compress and a gauze was irritating and making Kurt grow all the more uneasy. When Kurt had gained sense of himself in the wintry Sunday morning, Y/N had already fled the scene, and it wasn't too long after that he was rushed over to the med bay by McCoy, (who apparently was also an early riser) after he saw the bright red and navy burn across his arm.

It looked worse than what it actually was.

"I need to speak vith Y/N, please!" Kurt pleaded. He knew she was probably terrified at the moment, he could picture her curled up in her room, her fingers tapping and fidgeting the way they would when she was nervous. He could see her pretty big eyes washed with fear and guilt, her lip quivering in dread for what was to happen to her.

Kurt wanted to teleport himself in there, hold her close and beg her to tell him what was wrong. He knew something had been bothering her all week, and maybe the week before that. But Y/N kept pushing him away, and despite how much that hurt, he acquiesced. He knew what it was like to need the space to solve the problem all on your own. Kurt could understand that.

What he couldn't understand was why you were so frightened when he appeared behind you. You weren't scared of him anymore...right?

No, no, Kurt shook that thought out of his head immediately. Those thoughts had no place in his affections for Y/N.

"Annnd...done!" Annie cheered, tying off the end of the gauze. "There you are Mr Wagner, good as new!"

"Danke." Kurt tried to smile wider, hoping to share the sweet older woman's enthusiasm, but he had far too much on his mind to try convincingly.

Hank rushed to replace Annie and stand beside Kurt by the hospital bed. "Before you go off Kurt," The doctor adjusted his glasses. "The Professor will need to speak with you."

At first he was puzzled, but then it occurred to him. Kurt's eyes narrowed at the pathetic excuse of a blanketed accusation.

"It vas an accident." He pushed. "And I need to talk to her."

Hank took in a breath, and let out the long sigh of a man still hoping for blatant obedience when he expected none from an stubborn blue teenager.

"Kurt-

"She isn't in trouble!" He pushed. "Really, it vas just a misunderstanding, Y/N doesn't need to be punished."

"I have no doubt about that Kurt." An older voice rang out from the hallway, right as the headmaster was wheeled in by Jean. Xavier smiled warmly at the two of them in the nonchalant manner one might expect for a picnic or agreeable business deal rather than a concussion and electrical burn in the medbay. It took Kurt a second to notice how his eyes never seemed to stray too far down, avoiding ever to catch his bandages.

Jean on the other hand was kicking with maternal instinct at the sight of him, and Kurt couldn't blame her. If the little hand mirror sitting upright on the nightstand beside him held any indication, he was quite the sight. To check for other injuries, he lost his warm sweater upon entering the medbay and was now only clothed in his black church slacks, Annie's gauze wrapped a good third of his arm, his hair was a mess of tangled black curls, and a small bruise at the base of his shoulder made an ugly mark so dark blue it might as well been black from where he collapsed on the porch.

The telepath said nothing, in or out his head, but Kurt had no doubt from the evil eye she gave his figure, there'd be questioning later on. Xavier nodded for Jean to let him take control of the chair as they were entirely in the room, and he wheeled over.

"There is no doubt in my mind Miss L/N did not do anything intentionally, I'm not here for a court testimonial Kurt," the Professor explained. "And no harm is to come to her."

Jean offered a hand. "We just need to know where she went."

Kurt's brows shot up. "Isn't she in her room?" That sense of dread returned. "Or-or the gardens?" His heart started to race. "The library! She usually sits by a vindow seat, I can show you!" He added quickly. "But I'm sure-

"Kurt she isn't in the manor." Jean interrupted. "We've looked everywhere, but wherever she is, she's also blocking us."

Xavier's hand went over Kurt's. "We need to make sure she's safe."

"But, but, I-" Kurt swallowed. "She's, she's not in her...room?" The last words came out in tiny whispers, one of a man unsure of what to fear, or what to do.

"Kurt?" Jean mumbled softly.

Kurt didn't respond, his gaze finally met back to the bleach white gauze scratching at his fur. He still couldn't quite piece together what happened, only that it wasn't good. Y/N could be rather unpredictable at times, an endless discovery, its what originally drew him to her. A quiet shell dressed in silks and pearls who constantly kept her eyes downcast. But then when he actually did get to know her...she was so dramatic, so secretly flamboyant and bold. She was a gorgeous, a striking light hidden away under layers of armor. Her mind was so sharp, and her heart so giving. She was just amazing in his eyes.

But that also meant she could be concerning. Her emotions ran so deep, she felt so much. Such empathy inspired him, but Kurt knew better than anyone the consequences of that.

His heart felt sore. He didn't blame her for wanting to be alone, but what was worrisome was the possibility his girlfriend had run off the property entirely. It wouldn't be hard, Y/N was smart, and it wasn't like she was running low on time; it was nearly noon now, and if no one really had an idea of where she went...

"Stop it! Stop that right now Kurt Wagner!" Jean snapped, her maternal demands of authority snapping him from trance.

Kurt paled. How long was she listening in?

"Thinking like that won't do anyone any good." Her bright red hair swished as walked towards her handbag, dropped by the door. "Professor," Jean's voice held grit. "We need to start a search now."

Kurt looked to see his mentor grimace.

Xavier shook his head. "Jean, my decision hasn't changed. Y/N needs to come back on her own." The professor winced and immediately went to ease his temple. "She won't run off!" His words firmed. "Forcing her back and getting others involved is only going to worsen the situation for everyone."

At this Kurt stood up. "Professo-

"We. Wait." Xavier forced Kurt's eyes to his. "You're healed enough to leave the med bay, but you must give her time." The older mutant softened his gaze. "Believe me Kurt, treading carefully is the best route."

Kurt forced his eyes away.

The professor must have taken this as subordinate and made it his place to leave. Annie made herself scarce after that, dropping a cookie in Kurt's hand and sheepishly smiling as she sent him on his way.

Kurt wouldn't lie to himself; as he grabbed his belongings, he seriously thought about just throwing the instruction to the wind and make a tread out to find Y/N. It had been snowing that morning, and it was likely the weather would be getting worse from there. It took a substantial amount of self control and hard earned respect for authority to keep Kurt walking to his room and not teleporting outside.

His room was cool when he opened the door, a gust of air made an instinctual trail of goosebumps trail down the arms and pinch lightly at the burns on his wrist. With a shut door, the cozy embrace of the hallway was lost and left Kurt alone in a dark and chilly dorm room.

Kurt made quick work dropping his things on the chair, cranking his heater up, then diving into his covers for the extra warmth. He huddled deeper into the blankets, trying to ignore the chill and push the worries from his head; hopefully he could slow them down long enough to try to gain some sleep.

Unfortunately, after several minutes of closing and re-opening his eyes over and over again, Kurt gave up. The blankets still huddled on his body, Kurt reached for his chair for the warmth of his sweater, his Holy book and rosary still delicately wrapped inside it.

His sweater added more warmth to the slowly heating room, and Kurt grabbed up his Bible and rosary.

The smooth red wood beads were silken against his callous, blue fingers. Every little round orb bumped as he traced with his fingers over each of them, so careful as to not leave one out. He had this rosary for almost as long as his memory could stretch, back to childhood when a local priest gave a helpless child a way to reach the Holy Grace of the Lord. Back when tears streamed down his face in a burning geyser of shame and self hatred, he begged for knowing why he was born the way he was, in the form of a demon, only for a aging priest with mere tiffs of white hair atop his head to tell him his purpose as the Lord's son, to prove how powerful and all giving such beautiful Grace is.

Kurt turned to the well loved Bible at his side, its black leather crackling from years of opening and closing, decorated with shiny gold lettering often traced with his fingers during those restless nights.

He flipped through the browning, aged pages so thin it was only by miracle he'd yet to rip them.

Kurt's memory took him to passages that could bring him better perspective.

Yellow eyes traveled past each small printed ink image of the Word, back and forth as old remembered lessons refreshed in his mind and put themselves at the front of his thoughts of self. Soon enough weary eyes grew heavier, with longer eye flutters and stretched moments to blink. Kurt flapped the leather to close the old Bible, and he drifted off to sleep.

Winter bit at the nerves on your fingers tips, a wind blew through your face and fell into the overstuffed sweater hanging loosely on your frame. It made you wonder if your lack of appetite these past few weeks had affected your weight that much.

As wind blew heavier and snow started to fall on your huddled form, that messy crackle of white heat stuttered inside you. Refusing to be slowed down in the freezing weather, it conducted strings of fractured lights across the layers of your skin.

You hated it. This lights continued to grow longer, curling tighter in your gut like thorny vines strangling you from the inside out, hitting more of your nerves and digging deeper into your flesh. It didn't hurt-it was worse than that; every-time a flash of light was released from its coil and rose to join its fellow conducts, a sickening sweet sensation of relief and restoration bubbled out of you.

With every electric bolt that slipped through your core, another strand of control broke away.

Sanity felt like it was slipping past like the snowflakes melting off your hair. You knew your body's reactions to the cold was to make you an increasingly brighter heat source; even the grass under you felt hot and dry in the middle of a chilling snowfall.

Everything was still spinning, not fast enough for you to fall off, but never slow enough for any aspect of control to return to you. The cloudiness had left some time ago, but all it did was keep the image alive, to remind you why you couldn't leave.

You hurt Kurt. You forced him on the ground-you burned him. You very likely gave him a concussion.

You didn't mean to.

You would never hurt someone on purpose.

A voice that sounded strangely like Kurt whispered in the far end of your mind, but you refused to defend it. It actually made you feel worse. Intent did not erase action; he did get hurt, whether you meant for it to happen or not. And if you couldn't trust yourself to not harm those you loved, how could you be expected not to hurt innocent civilians, not endanger the mission?

Your knees hugged closer to your chest.

You couldn't do the mission. Your fingers dug into your knees. You couldn't do anything!

Except ruin everything!

A harsher voice snapped louder in your mind. And it was right. You wanted to be in control, you wanted to be better; for you, for mom, your friends, your teachers, you were letting everyone down but no matter how hard you tried you never could and never would gain control.

A harsh pain stung behind your eyes and you shut them tight to release hot droplets down your cheeks. You were a waste. All the time, the money, the emotional effort they gave you and you could do nothing but waste it. You hurt, and destroyed.

That's all you could ever do.

A scream ripped open out of your throat, and you gave a hard swing of your fist up into the air. What followed was another, larger, knot, unstrung and released electric light to hit against the wind. The blinding light was followed by a therapeutic, and freeing sensation.

Goose flesh returned with a new, freshly licked heat that made you shiver.

A crunching sound of something moving against the snow, snapped you up to your surroundings. You shivered again.

"Thought I scented something different." The gruff, grizzly bear of a man walked closer to the spot you were huddled across. His heavy black boots made a harsh crunching stomp of the forest floor, making sense of this noise.

Logan raised an eye at your surely pitiful little form. He had left unannounced right before the winter break in December. When did he get back?

"That light was impressive, but shouldn't you be inside right now?"

A sad smile tug at your lips, still clinched tightly into a ball, you only dared to raise your head and give him a look over. "Shouldn't you be wearing more than an old leather jacket?"

The Wolverine pulled a smirk with his raised eye and took a deep puff the cigar hanging from his mouth. "You really wanna play that game kid?"

Your tiny smile dropped, and the heat tightened again. "N-no..." You whimpered, the thorns were sharpening.

Logan's footsteps picked paced closer. "Hey, hold on-

You panicked. "NO!" You shouted, instantly regretting it as the pain returned; your eyes squeezed shut and you huddled deeper into your jeans. "Please, please, don't." You pleaded.

The coil became tighter and tighter again, but you couldn't act against it, able only to watch streaks of electricity spike across the goosebumps on your arms.

"Its," a pause. "Its okay kid." His voice became quieter. "I'm not gonna hurt ya."

You shook your head, the tears were filling back up in your eyes. "That's not-it" you gulped a sob. "please, just leave!"

"Kid-

"I'm going to hurt you!" You bit into your jean clad thigh and dug your fingers deeper, More lights loosened themselves, the vines refused to tangle back despite how hard you tried to pull them down; it was like swimming through molasses, and your head kept falling back under, blocking the air from your lungs.

"No you're not."

You shook your head. "Yes I-

"You can't hurt me kid." He growled. "No one can." You could hear Logan sigh and a small shuffle of movement, yet it didn't seem like he was moving closer-which kept the sparks from growing fast and made the coil slow.

"Just look up for a second-if ya still want me to scram after, then I will."

Once again you waited to see if he moved, your muscles stayed tense, just in preparation to scream and run before you did damage to a teacher of all people. When you didn't hear any, you gave his offer a quick thought. At the moment, you just wanted to be left alone, maybe you'd freeze, though you doubted it, or maybe you would just wait until Xavier formally kicked you to the curb, called up your mother and have you flown back to Chicago in disgrace, destined to never leave your room.

It wasn't a good plan, but it was the only one you had.

Bitterly, you thought you might as well prove Logan wrong so that he could leave and allow you to continue your descent from grace. You raised you head up just slightly, your knees were still tucked close to your chest and your arms tightened considerably.

Logan gave a nod of what you couldn't tell either to be some form of kind pity or bitter bemusement and gave his cigar another puff. He laid his hand out and holding his cancer stick flat out for you to see, before then forcefully slamming the charring thing into the flattened palm of his hand.

Your eyes widened and you shrieked in horror as his tanned skin began to redden and you were certain he'd pull it out in pain. Except he didn't; he dug the horrid thing deeper and the wound grew darker as it burned off layer by layer of fragile flesh. When he finally pulled the used cigar away into the snow, the callous hand bore an ugly a burnt hole seared into it; one of blackened skin bespectacled in juicy pink and red. It made you feel sick.

Then a remarkable change occurred. Blackened edges of the wound began to lighten, appearing black, to brown, to just the correct shade as the rest of his skin, the skin thickened in seconds, and the edges became smaller and smaller until nothing remained but a fresh palm of skin.

You blinked your eyes, concerned if perhaps you had imagined it, but when you raised your eyes up to the teacher, he just shrugged and gave you that knowing glance of 'I told you so.'

In return your eyes went downcast from the large man. You stayed quiet but you didn't protest as the footsteps turned louder in volume and the presence of his figure was mere inches from your face. You squeezed tighter into your shell, the sparks were smaller, not as violent, but still apparent-it wouldn't turn off.

Logan leaned on his knees. You didn't meet his eye.

"Now kid, I'm not mad, but ya gotta give me the whole story. What happened?"

"I-" You swallowed, the memory still singed in your memory. Your core was hardening, shaking as you try to hold both it and the tears back. Unfortunately you failed miserably. Water dripped from your eyes, you bit the inside of your cheek.

"I didn't mean to-but it just happened." Sobs broke out. "Everything felt so bad, and I didn't want to worry anyone and Kurt found me and I didn't want to make him worry so I tried to push it around but I couldn't help it-" Your words dropped out of your throat in a sloppy flow caught in stuttered ends while you gasped to keep your breath as the tears fell. "Then I panicked and it , it,itjusthappENED!" You wailed.

"He fell down, and I ran-and now I can't turn it off." You gripped your hands tight. "It hurts so much, everything burns and my head is splitting in two." Your breath continued to thicken, and it was taking much more conscious thought to push the air in and out of your lungs.

Logan's voice interrupted you. "Hey, hey now-" He snapped his fingers in front of you. "There's no need for that kid."

Breathing was near impossible now, your lungs closing in as your core tightened, despite the amount of electricity escaping. You couldn't get a grasp on any of them, they were flowing through your veins, shining, firing off your body. Your head felt foggier; it felt like you were suffocating.

"Shit!" You could barely hear Logan.

"...got...calm...attack..."

Dots were forming in your vision, black stains that stuck out against all the white.

"Hey, HEY!" Something was shaking you. "..Fo..on me-" The sensation of movement was making words wobble back into your head.

"on me...Focus on me. How you breathe. You can get through this."

You can get through this...you can get this...I can get through this.

Your eyes blinked up to him.

"Breath in-"

You obeyed.

"-breath out."

And you did.

"Stay present." The shaking was still there, but you could still feel Logan's hands on your arms-not harsh, but reassuring. "Focus on breathing. You are in control. Only you."

You kept breathing. In and out. You are in control. "I..." you swallowed. "I'm in control?" In and out.

"Good." A deep voice, Logan said. "You're doing great kid. Now say that again."

"I'm in control?" You mumbled.

"Again, louder."

"I am. in control."

"Again!" He barked.

"I'm in control!" You snapped at him.

Logan smiled. "Yeah." He nodded. "Yeah ya are kid." Logan gestured down. "Look."

You followed his instruction and paused at your hands. They were fine. Normal skin, smooth, simple...normal. You hesitated for a moment before grabbing on to your sleeve and pushing it up. No sparks, no flashes of heat, none.

The sight astounded you. "I'm fine?"

"You're in control."

You had a tiny nod. "Yeah." You took in a breath. "Yeah...I am!"

"Now then." Logan groaned, seating himself on the dry grass around you. "Why don't we try this again."

It started off slow, often you asked for a moment to breathe and gain back perspective, and Logan let you. He stayed silent for majority of your retelling, only asking for clarification when needed. Often you apologized, told him how you knew how childish and pathetic you were acting, but Logan shook his head and told you 'its fine' and 'keep going'.

Everything mostly felt explained out of order. You started with that morning and the blast; you commented how it had been going on for weeks. You told him about the first mission and how you felt you were disappointing everyone. Eventually, you even went to the topic of your mother. At this point you had verbalized so much of what was happening inside you that nothing came unfiltered. You spoke of a life with an absentee mother you disappointed at every turn, of the gloves and long sleeves she had packed in your suitcase the morning you were sent off to the institute. Even the thoughts in your head were mentioned, the twisting ache you felt eating you from the inside out. Logan allowed you to do so.

Finally it seemed you were done, spilling a life's worth emotional destruction that reached its peak in the last few weeks. Logan grunted and grabbed for another cigar from his back pocket; the action might have seemed unsympathetic, but you could tell that wasn't the intention. His eyes remained trained on you with an interest that told you weren't inconveniencing him.

He took a deep puff. "So tell me kid." Another puff. "What about this mission Chuck wants you on?"

Your brow furrowed. "I don't understand what you mean." You shrugged. "Professor Xavier hadn't given us any information yet and besides-" You eyed him. "He said it was classified."

Logan gave a hearty chuckle. "Heh...listen kid, what's 'classified' for you, ain't whats classified to him." He let out a puff of smoke into the air. "Hell, there's hardly anything Chuck doesn't let me know, I might even join you kids on your little mission."

"oh." You said quietly.

Logan smirked. "Still, it says something that Chuck trusted you on this." Cigar ashes dropped onto the ground as he spoke, his eyes alight. "It says something about you."

Your eyes trailed down to catch the gray and black flecks as they wisped down into the snowy ground. A nagging thought tugged on your membrane.

"What is it?" Logan asked, and it made you wonder how transparent you were.

"I mean," You sighed. "Its not that big of an accomplishment, Jean and Scott are just a year older than me and they've been on dozens of missions, not to mention Kurt and Ororo"

"And I'm gonna stop you right there Sparks." Logan dragged the cigar from his lips. "Let me give you some advice; there will always someone who does it better, and always someone who does it worse." Finally, he stopped off the cigar. "It makes trying to compare a waste of your time."

"But I'm-

"A mutant." Logan stated. "And a pretty damn good one." He eyed you. "You're not cold are you?"

You shook your head 'no'.

The older man nodded. "Uh huh. And you were smart enough to run into the woods instead of towards the main road. You knew the best way you could."

You retorted. "But the others-

"Maybe they would, maybe they wouldn't." Logan shrugged. "Waste of time."

His words made you slump in defeat. And for a few seconds you stayed like that, groaning at the smirk Logan had on his face. Must despite that, you did feel better, more relaxed even. You dared take a glance at your arms, you could tell the electricity was still active, but safe under a second and third layer of your skin instead of on the surface.

Logan rose to his feet, giving a groan from having sat down so long. He looked down at you, and pocketed the burnt out cigar in his back pocket.

"You ready to go now kid?"

You paused, a reminder of that you were still going to be in a chasm full of trouble resurfaced and you hesitated.

Logan sighed, but kept his hand still open for you. "You're going to have to face it eventually. This way, you'll have someone by your side before Chuck ducks into your skull there."

His sarcasm made you giggle and you sheepishly nodded, ready to follow his lead.

Logan kept you at a gentle pace on the way back to the institute, clearly in no rush to return and it made you wonder if he would allow you turn back if you asked. He stayed a good few feet from you, though you figured that was more for your benefit than his, seeing as he already proved you couldn't really hurt him.

That was a solid thought on your mind. Logan had healing abilities, and crazy fast ones by the looks of it. It made you wonder, what else did you not know about your professor? If he didn't permanently injure, did that mean he didn't have to age? Did he have to heal from his claws or did his mutation account for that? Why was Logan gone for months at a time?

You inwardly cringed at how much you suddenly became invested in your teacher, but you couldn't lie, it was...nice knowing there was someone you weren't a risk to. And that thought made you pause.

What would happen when you came back? How could you ever face Kurt again? How could you ever face anyone again?

Even if Kurt forgave, though you wouldn't blame him if not, how could you possibly keep a relationship with him, knowing that every second with you was another step on a landmine? It was only a matter of time before something else happened.

Maybe you had it right before. Perhaps it'd be better to turn back, have Xavier ring your home in Chicago and clean up your mess quietly.

"Hold it."

You paused, just to see you almost ran into Logan's extended arm. The rugged man didn't meant your eyes, and you could tell by his expression, his thoughts were on somewhere else entirely. You tried to follow his gaze up to the trees, but whatever Logan saw, or sniffed, or heard, or whatever...you were at a loss.

You mumbled. "..logan?"

"C'mon on OUT!" Wolverine shouted. "I won't play games with you."

Games? If you weren't confused before, you were now.

That only lasted until the sound of a large weight plummeting behind you, forced your attention in its direction. A rough shove to the side had you almost hitting the forest floor, but when your eyes looked up to Logan, his' were hyper focused on the figure in front of you.

A rather large, ragged silhouette of shaggy fur dressed in a tattered array of browns, black, and metal. It hurriedly pulled itself up to full height, revealing himself a man...of sorts at least. Obviously mutant, with sharpened canines and golden eyes so very not human in design. What you originally thought to be fur was actually tussles of mud brown hair unkempt and waving around his face.

He smiled, drawing attention that all his teeth were sharp, it wasn't just his canines.

"Ruin the fun now don't we." His voice was purr of raw gravel on a dusty dirt road. The sound itself rattled your knees. "Should've finished this in Arizona. But you had to high tail it back to school huh runt?"

A throaty growl came from Logan, followed by the familiar sound of metal scraping as his claws opened up in front of you.

"Aww. And who's this little lady? Don't tell me you weren't going to share."

Shivers stung up your sides and the back of your mouth went dry.

"Last warning Creed!" Logan shouted and you felt his weight leave you to move forwards. "Walk away now, while you still have legs to walk on."

Another, much harder push to your side had you forced down into the snow. The cold an immediate death from the heat of freshly electrified skin. You could already detect currents of light pushing past upwards layers of your skin.

Slashed strips of tree bark and bits of broken off granite plagued the icy floor. Ignoring blurred vision, you swept around to pinpoint the center of destruction. You could spot movement coming a few yards back where you had been, and hurriedly dragged your hyper shocked body towards the chaos.

Wolverine didn't see you, he had his attention entirely on this 'Creed' person, having him cornered at the base of one of the larger oaks. Your fingers were shaking in anticipation, electric vines wrapping rough in your chest. Creed was so much bigger than Logan, looked more a predator as well; and even if Logan didn't look scared, you couldn't bare to see him hurt.

You shut your eyes and focused on the pain, the returning suffocation from within. An instinct took over, your arm raised in Creed's direction, and you released.

The loose light relieved you, but the cold grunt of a large force being hit by your electricity did that even more. You quickly skitted over towards Logan, no longer at the tree. He turned and glared at you.

"Get out of here Sparks! Now!" He barked.

You shook your head. "I won't leave here without you." Wary eyes glanced at the grumbling figure mere feet away from you.

"Y/N! That's an order." Wolverine's eyes narrowed. "This ain't your fight. I'm not arguing with you."

Anger fired to life inside you, sparks readily flared and at your disposal. He had no right to demean you like this.

Logan opened his mouth to retort, only cut by a loud, irritated groan.

Creed's body rounded up, his head rolled around to meet your gaze. "C'mon darlin." You could once again grimace at the display that was supposed to be a smile. "Give an ol' man a show."

You scowled, electricity building in your grip. Oh you'd give him a show alright. His eyes trailed down towards your exposed fist, surging with light. A pleased grin on his face.

"Leave her alone!" Wolverine growled. "Your fight is with me."

"Aww, give her a chance runt." The beastly man smirked at you.

You had enough. The light was already pulsing back against your skin. If he wanted to mock you, why not blow off some steam? Electricity escaped with a wave of your arm and towards the mutant.

"Kid!"

A heavy force landed beside you and forced your body rolling away in the snow. He had dodged your attack and threw himself inches away from you.

Then you were burning. Your backside stung with fresh cuts in the skin and ripped a shriek out of you. You bit your lip and shivered trying to turn your back down into the icy ground. Despite breaking skin, his cuts on your back weren't clean.

When you looked back up, a cold, calloused hand was lazily draped atop your throat, limiting your ability to breathe. Amused eyes looked down at you above a sharpened smile.

Panic raked inside you, and the electricity was building. But you didn't dare lift a muscle.

Creed tutted at you. "Aw, I'm disappointed darlin." His shorter nails grew under your chin, displaying a pair of sharped, yellowed claws. "You were doing so well too."

"Let her go Sabertooth." You could hear Logan plead a distance away. "She's just a kid."

"Now, now, Logan. She gave it her best shot." His gaze left yours to look up in the direction of Wolverine's voice and movement. "You can't kill me. I can't kill you. That much is obvious."

You watched carefully as his eyes stayed glued up to where Logan was undoubtedly pissed off. His claws were on your neck, keeping you from looking back up. But on the inside you felt anxious sparks needing release; you focused and stroked the currents inside, leading them to a different area of your bloodstream.

"Creed-"

"Doesn't mean I can't hurt ya." At the first prick at your flesh, you threw both your hands onto Sabertooth's arms, and forced electricity out of you.

He shouted and ripped away from you just long enough for you to scamper back to Logan's side.

Wolverine snarled at you. "Run back to the house! NOW!"

His shouts made you flinch, and the movement made you wince.

Logan must have noticed, and he gave you a once over. You couldn't tell if your back was still bleeding from Sabertooth's claw marks, but you definitely were still in pain.

"I'm fine." You lied. "And obviously" you pulled out both hands still coated in light. "Can take care of myself."

Sabertooth pounced in your direction, claws out. This time you were ready and made quick work to redirect yourself. When he landed and faced you, you had already used both hands to release a wall of electric energy in front of you. One wrong move and he'd be electrocuted. He wouldn't dare.

He did and you weren't prepared for a hard leather boot pounding at your side. You hit the ground, but this time, you quickly forced yourself up before claws could hit you.

Logan tackled him from behind and threw him across the forest floor; this gave you an opening to aim back at your enemy. You jumped forward and threw electricity out in his direction.

"Ragh!" Creed growled. His eyes turned to you. "You lil' brat!"

You straightened your posture, hissing at the continuous sting from your back wounds, and put yourself in a stance to properly conduct electricity.

Logan leaped in front of you, his metal claws directed towards his opponent.

Your instinct took over and you darted to the side of your rugged offender while Logan handled his front. Electricity was free flowing and you released it.

Creed's body spun out of your line of attack, and you darted downwards to avoid a risky pounce from the feline-esq mutant.

A low growl hit your ears and you spun around. A large smack hit against your head, and before you could gasp in a breath, you felt the air as your body flew past airborn, then a cold landing breaking through to your ribs.

You tried to groan and release some breath, but the ache returned across your ribcage. The sharp pain made you shiver.

Angry hot tears flooded in your eyes and blurred your vision. Electric crackled on your skin, the heat warmed your cold, harsh pain if only for a soft moment.

A heavy weight pushed itself on your chest and you cried out from the painful sensation. You could feel it digging deeper onto your body, crushing you. Static electric currents rushed all around your body and you tried to focus on that instead. The sweet warmth inside you rushed all over your skin in a panic from the pain, desperate to defend its host, you.

It was to no avail. You continued to be slowly and painfully crushed by the larger body. Only small whimpers fell from your lips. A horrid chilled hand wrapped tightly around your neck, over your throat. Air escaped you as you tried to force it in your lungs.

You tried to gasp and reach for your throat, but another cold tendril pulled you back, risking to snap your wrist, and the weight on your chest was heightened. Electricity sparked and brightened itself, blinding your already muddled vision.

Icy nails diggeged into your skin, freezing you inside despite the heat of your electricity trying to flare further but it was no use. The more your fire tried to stoke higher, the more that arctic chill diminished you and slowly began putting out the light that stubbornly tried to fight against you.

Admist the watery hot blurs of tears, you could spot light gray and black spots dipping across your vision and an ache in your mind made a cloudy, fluffy sensation deepen in your head. You felt dizzy.

The cold was coating all the heat inside you, scorching any warm comfort your light tried to give you. Your head felt as though it was churning and spinning as ice dug deeper into your veins.

Lack of breath no longer scared you, you couldn't comprehend what was going on anyways. Your heat began to diminish faster. A forest fire became a tiny flickering candle flame whilst the glacier grew in your body and suffocated the light inside you.

Then you felt darkness surround you, nothing else.

When you woke up, you hadn't even realized you had fainted, only of the abrupt, steel drumstick beating against all corners of your brain in a distorted rhythm. You groaned but you didn't risk moving around, less your skull decided to crack open.

That's when you heard a tiny beep. One after the other, a light beep hit the air, followed by another, then another.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

The repetitive nature irked you from the inside, and did nothing to lessen the bruising ache in your head. Against your better judgement, you tried to open your eyes, and was rewarded with another shot of pain near the center of your forehead. You grimaced, but quickly gained the strength to blink your eyes open.

It was dark, and you were alone. This wasn't your room, but judging by the lack of decor or furniture aside from the medical lined bed you laid in and a couple chairs, all bets pointed to you being in the medical bay. You felt exhausted, even under the warmth of the covers your body gave no desire to sit up or wrap yourself deeper into the heated blankets. The image of a juiced orange came to mind; shriveled, sunken in, and empty after having been drained of its nutrients. Your arms and legs felt limp, and the pain in your skull begged for a return to sleep. Every second awake seemed to drain more out of you.

On the bright side, you were too tired to be paranoid at the moment. If you were in the med bay, then it goes to show the situation had been dealt with. The rest of the team had arrived, and whilst you laid pathetic on the ground out cold, they cleaned up the mess you made. That sounded about right to you. No doubt they all probably had a victory dinner, congratulating each other on a job well done, whilst you remained nestled away in a easily forgotten room inside the med bay.

It was probably for the best that way.

You refused to listen. Logan had decades of experience, and a healing mutation to boot! He could take of himself; in all honesty, you only made things worse. By sticking around, you made yourself the perfect target for a brutal enemy, and caused so much more trouble than if you had just listened and let someone better handle it. You wouldn't blame Xavier if he came rolling in by morning, your bags packed and a plane ticket in his hand.

You slumped back in the bed. The ache in your head was fading, but the exhaustion in your body was still very apparent, and the idea of just sleeping your problems away was sounding pretty good at this point.

BAMF!

The unprompted blast shocked you into an upright position on the bed, and waved back the tiredness for high alert. Your eyes darted to the source of the sound-which just so happened to be showing off a toothy grin as the smoke wavered.

Kurt's eyes met yours. "Guten tag." He gave a beaming smile. "How'd you sleep?"

You grimaced. "You need to leave Kurt."

"I just came in to check on jou." Kurt mumbled, fidgeting with his own tail. "Jou had a pretty rough day and...."

It was mostly a blur to be honest. A coarse of bright energy directing and redirecting through your body. The world was blinding, you couldn't recall being able to see or hear, only feel. Feeling the electric currents of the world around you exhilarating you, pumping in your veins faster and vitalizing far more than your blood could provide.

Volts huddled into bright, sporadic fragments of energy, each bundle slightly differing. You felt it all-sensing the vibrancy with every volt, bending and twisting them as your instincts saw fit.

You shuddered at the memory. "Yeah."

Silence hung in the air like an executioner's blade, torturous anticipation draped over a core of dread. All there was to do was wait and see which one of you would take the swing.

Eyes still glued to your lap, they quickly caught the shifting shadow moving towards you. Kurt took a seat at the end of your bed whilst you pushed yourself as far back to the headboard as you could, accidentally wincing when your head hit the wood.

Kurt shook his head. "Jou don't have to do that! Jou....I....am.." He thought carefully. "...its gutt to see you"

You hugged yourself tightly. The damage you did still seared in your mind and you grimaced. *So much destruction.*

Eventually your head rose to meet his forlorn expression. Your heart ached, a desire to comfort almost took over, but you pushed it aside. That's when you noticed the bit of white sticking out from his sweater sleeve. Its texture easily recognizable as that of medical bandaging.

Shame hit you. "You need to leave." You repeated.

"Why?!" Kurt stared up at you. "Why do I *need* to leave? I don't vant to abandon jou."

"Look at me!" You seethed. Though you wouldn't dare letting loose of your arms, you shook your head around the room, the bed, at you. "I'm damaged! I'm dangerous to everyone around me!" Tears pricked at your retinas. "And I can't control it! Look at what I did to you!"

"I'm fine!" He shouted firmly.

That took you aback. It was rare to hear Kurt raise his voice, and you honestly never heard him sound so angry.

But that didn't change anything. "Then look at the forest! The place is scorched now because of me!"

"Jou vere almost killed Y/N. And jou did what jou had to." Kurt was moving closer to the bed, and you could only back away so far. "Jou fought bravely."

You groaned. "No! I was being childish, and stubborn, and put this entire school in danger. Logan could have handled it on his own but I....you don't get it." He was still missing the point! How could he still not understand?

He sighed. "Just...just help me understand. Please."

Amid that familiar coiled sensation of rejuvenating energy, came with it a hollow sting. He really didn't understand. Whilst you gritted your teeth against who you were, you had left Kurt stumbling in the dark, puzzled why the one he was dating decided to ignore him. It was selfish and petty of you.

Your eyes went downcast. "There is," words failed you, "something inside me. And it is constantly growing, I can't turn it off!" You bit the inside of your cheek. "And sure, you're fine now, but you could've been hurt. I don't have control over myself Kurt."

Kurt stayed silence as you tried to straighten your posture, continuing. "And electricity is too dangerous without control."

Several minutes passed as you waited for a reply from the mutant next to you. It started with Kurt slowly moving closer towards you. His hand hovered over your sock covered foot. You didn't flinch at that, as long as he stayed away from bare flesh, especially your hands, you acquiesced, and he did gently put a hand on your foot.

"Its okay."

You raised your head up, your face betraying you for astonishment. Okay? OKAY? How the Hell was anything about this okay? You just admitted you couldn't control an incredibly deadly element constantly building inside you. In what universe was that okay?

He gave a tiny chuckle. "Its okay, to be scared" Kurt added. "And vorried, and cautious." He cleared his throat. "But ve're all learning. Jou may not understand everyzhing there is to know about jour powers. But jou vill."

A hand fell to your arm and you flinched away from him. "But what about when mistakes happen? When I hurt someone?" You demanded. "I can't turn it off like Scott or Alex! I can't fix things like Ororo! I can't-

"Jou aren't them Y/N!" Kurt's hand stayed stubbornly on your arm. "And jou are no more dangerous than any of us."

"You can't hurt people!"

He didn't falter. "Sure I could." He tapped his fingers on your arm. "I am much faster than most people, and zehn times as agile." His face went closer to you, teeth showing.

"Mein teeth are very sharp. I can port from place to place. I can even fence pretty well...if I do say so myself." He grinned.

You couldn't help but let a chuckle escape for his dorkiness.

"I von't lie to jou liebe." Kurt sighed. "Jour power is so great. I don't blame you for vanting to be safe." His arm trailed further up. "But I am not afraid of jou."

"You should." Simple as that.

You felt Kurt sit up, still close beside you. "Open jour palms." He instructed.

Did you hear correctly? Your body stilled. "What?"

"Open jour palms." Kurt echoed.

"Why?!" You snapped, not daring to release the primary outlet of your energy out towards someone else, especially not Kurt.

Kurt didn't flinch as you raised your voice. "I vant to try somezhing. Please open jour palms and close jour eyes." His eyes got wide and his lip pouted.

Your head ached. Damn him and his puppy eyes.

Hesitant, you slowly uncurled your arms from under you. Your skin wasn't sparking, but your body still shivered. Shaky hands were cautiously observed before you dared open them flat.

"Take it slow liebe."

Kurt's soft lull soothed you, if only slightly, and you obeyed. Your eyes fluttered closed, and your palms rested on the cool mint bed sheets.

"Good. Jou're doing great mein liebe. Now take a breath. Try to relax."

A deep breath filled your lungs and you released it slowly.

"Ja! Just like that." Kurt lulled. "Just like that."

You kept breathing, slowly and carefully.

"You're okay." You breathed, the pumping in your heart had slowed down considerably. His skin was a brilliant navy blue, your own flesh unblemished by rushing light. An airy bubble flew through your body and kept you weightless.

You smiled. "You really are okay?"

Kurt chortled at your pleased expression. His grin widened considerably.

"So are jou mein schatz." Kurt responded in kind. "Jou are so much more capable than jou know."

You wanted to believe him, you really did. Yet, that pit, one formed with the knowledge of what your power looked like untamed, it was smaller than before, but it could not be entirely covered up by pretty words. Your eyes turned downcast to the nightstand.

"Liebe." You heard him speak softly. "Look over here."

A tickling tapped at your leg and you looked down. Draped over the base of your leg, right under your knee, a slinky smooth blue tail layed lazily.

You blinked, you were only wearing a hospital gown-no doubt your clothes were removed to check for injuries and he was....

"How long-

"A while." Kurt answered. "Almost the entire time I've been in here actually. And nozhing happened." The fanged grin returned. "Not even a spark."

Words were lost on you, your eyes still watching over the navy tail on your unclothed leg, nothing safeguarding his tail getting burned. But he was alright.

He touched your hands, and he was alright.

Everything was alright.

You heard Kurt clear his throat, and had you glancing up at him.

"Now do you believe me liebe?"

The question repeated in your head and you frowned. Honestly, no; you couldn't think this changed everything, that you would suddenly be able to control your so uncontrollable mutation with the snap of a finger-you couldn't afford to think such easing thoughts.

The entire situation made you want to scream. You didn't want to disappoint him, but you were so sick of lying to him. Shame flooded down your throat, threatening to suffocate you the longer you refused to answer, or even meet his gaze.

Kurt's hand tightened on yours.

"Can-" He faltered. "Can you try? Just try jour best, that's all."

That's all. The thought made you pause. You doubted you could ever truly succeed, and give Kurt what he wanted, but at the very least you could say you tried.

You looked at the hand wrapped in yours. He held you so gently, yet seemed to completely engulf you in that gentleness at the same time. That comforting feeling was worth anything, especially for your efforts to try.

Though your eyes stayed glued to your conjoined hands, you could still feel Kurt's eyes on you, awaiting your answer.

You nodded.

"Okay."