Safe.
Safe is Peter curled up in the arms of someone he knows. Arms of Tony, Pepper, May, Ned, or MJ curled around him.
Safe is sitting in a kitchen, watching Sam and Bucky bicker behind Steve as he cooks pasta. Pepper, Nat, and Wanda sitting nearby with wine glasses, sipping and talking easily. Tony talking to Rhodey about God knows what. Vision and Clint paying Mario Kart, even though Clint knows Vision will win.
Safe is building Hogwarts out of Legos on the flood with Ned as MJ reads her book on Ned’s bed.
Safe is the feeling of air passing his body as he swings through Queens.
Safe is normal. Safe is sweet and comforting.
Safe is a lie we tell ourselves to escape the reality that everything isn’t actually safe.
Danger.
Danger is the screams of pain as people fall down around Peter.
Danger is the weight of a building collapsing on him.
Danger is the fear of a metal shield flying at his face.
Danger is free falling with balls of fire and metal around him.
Danger is drowning in a lake.
Danger is fear.
Danger is feeling half of the universe collectively dying. A million souls screaming in your ears and the feeling of dread and wrongness hitting you like a freight train at 250 miles per hour. The fear that rips through you as people you fight with break down to dust.
Danger is feeling your body fall apart and scramble to rebuild itself as your inevitable death quickly approaches.
“M- Mr. Stark-”
“Kid?”
Fear.
Fear is pain that you see in the one man you love and trust around you’s eyes.
“I-I don’t feel so good.”
Fear is falling into his arms, you legs not working anymore.
Fear is falling to the ground, his eyes staring down.
“Please, I don’t want to go.”
Fear is not knowing what will happen afterwards.
Fear is thinking about life after death.
Fear is wondering if there is an edge of the universe, one where people will run to escape their own death.
“Kid!”
“I’m… I’m sorry!”
Fear is knowing that your last hope is stranded on a far away planet, away from his family and team.
Melancholy.
Melancholy is the feeling of emptiness.
Melancholy is floating in an orange hue until the end of what seems like time.
Melancholy is not knowing who you are or why you are there.
Melancholy is existence.
Relief.
Relief is the joy of waking up, the world slamming into view.
Relief is to be able to move your limbs, feel your limbs.
Relief is crying in the arms of the man that held you as you died.
Relief is being able to go home, see your family and just know that they’re alive and He is dead.
Relief is knowing He can never rip you away from life.
Relief is being safe.
Safe is being able to curl up and know that everyone will be okay again.
Safe is being with you.
Safe in your arms.