Chapter 3
He has been in the Barton’s house for at least an hour, bringing his stuff inside and setting up the perimeter for his suits to roam.
He has barely interacted with the kids, neither of the ones being able to talk deigns him with words, both staring at him. Cooper in a more ‘I’ve tried to be sneaky at first by hiding behind a book like in the movies but now I’ve given that up in favor of openly staring’ way, while Lila is watching him in a more ‘I’m not even in the room, but I’m watching you’ kind of way.
Tony swears to whoever is listening that the girl is watching him. But every time he turns around there is no one but the dog- Lucky, he remembers, to keep him company. Either he is going insane or Lila is a sneaky little agent
After the umpteenth time he turns around to find noting he sighs. He is definitely going insane. He closes his eyes and rubs at them with the back of a shaky hand. His mental state isn’t at its best and he doesn’t like to be reminded of it.
He turns back to the task at hand and is startled by Cooper, on top of the stairs, book abandoned and looking at him with obvious confusion. Right, the boy’s mother had told him to stay with Tony in case he needed anything while she checked on Nathaniel.
Tony tries to get back to- whatever he was doing. He has literally no idea of what he was doing just a moment ago. He sighs again and looks at the screwdriver in his hand, but for the life of him he can’t remember what he was doing with it. Tony looks up at Cooper. Maybe the kid could remind him what he was doing, but that means admitting he can’t remember, and that’s a no-no.
Because if he has to admit he is having problems with his memory than it would lead to more questions, and he just couldn’t open up about the problems he has been having since the Civil-Whatever.
Not only with his memory, but also with eating, and sleeping, and that itchy feeling he gets every time it’s cold, and the need to be close to at least one of the armors, and his being overly paranoid- but was it really being paranoid if almost everyone around you has proven to be untrustworthy? and- God, he’s going insane for sure.
Sure, he was able to open up a bit with Laura the other day, but it was probably cause he hasn’t talked with anyone but his bots and the Accords’ Council in at least- well, he can’t really remember that either. Maybe since the Raft? He doesn’t really count Siberia since he doesn’t really want to think about it. Oh! Maybe it was that time when Happy called to check on him three months ago? Was it three months ago? Or maybe- he shakes his head, whatever, he doesn’t need people, he has his bots, and that is enough. It has to be. It would be. It is.
Is it?
He lets out a slow breath and returns to look at Cooper, abandoning his previous task. The kid can’t see Tony’s eyes and scars because of the holo-glasses, but he still squints at him trying to see past the lenses. Tony shifts from foot to foot, nervously fidgeting with the hem of his shirt in the wake of the kid’s silent stare. When he finally can’t take the silence anymore, Tony tries to make conversation by asking questions the kid won’t answer. The questions start with a shaky ‘so, uh, do you like the hunger games book?’ (smooth, Stark) that leads to, weirdly enough, after a rambling session, or, as Rhodey’d call it, word vomit, ‘…but I swear it was legal- wait… do you even know what marijuana is?’ that leads to a panicky ‘should you know what it is?’ and an ‘oh god, please don’t tell your mother I told you what marijuana is, please?’
Still, the kid doesn’t speak. But, and it might or might not be a trick of the light, after almost thirty minutes of no reactions the kid is smiling!
Okay, so, it isn’t a smile smile, but there is a slight upturn to the corner of Cooper’s mouth and- yeah, he is almost maybe definitely sure it isn’t a trick of the light!
He is definitely counting it as a victory
Laura finally comes back with Nate in her arms saving him from the awkward silence that was sure to come. She takes one look at her ‘smiling’ son and raises her eyebrows. The kid shies away from his mother’s questioning glance and scurries up the stairs, almost forgetting his book before Tony reminds him of it. Cooper grabs it and makes a motion with his hand that means thank you in sign language.
Tony turns to Laura confused. The last time he was at the house with Clint the kid could definitely talk. “What’s up with Little Agent Senior?”
“He… he doesn’t really- he likes sign language” she fumbles a bit before sighing “there was always a risk of them losing some of their hearing like Clint did, so we taught them sign language from a young age” she takes a moment to calm Nate down before she keeps going “he can hear, it’s just… every time something bad happens- a traumatic event- like when his only grandparent died, he reverses to sign language. He can talk, he just… doesn’t. Not since Clint left” she looks at the point where her son was just a minute ago “he hasn’t talked for almost five months straight this time” she looks… incredibly sad “usually he used to stop talking for weeks at a time, but-” she lets out a shaky breath “but never to this extent” she says shaking her head sadly.
Comfort never was his forte, but as he looks at the tears that threaten to spill over her cheeks, he feels something inside himself stir. He doesn’t even notice his hand coming up until it’s almost resting on her shoulder. He stops himself a second before it comes to touch her shoulder, not really knowing if it’s his place to comfort her, maybe she wouldn’t want him to- maybe they aren’t there yet. But then he looks from his hand to her sad, sad eyes, resting on the stairs, and he thinks screwit. His hand gently falls to her shoulder, startling her out of her trance, and taking in a shaky breath she latches on his hand with her own while awkwardly holding Nathaniel.
For a few moments she just stands there holding his hand, breathing deeply and trying to gather herself. Once the tears have dried she lets her hand fall to her son’s back, rubbing calming circles on it. She blinks a couple of times, clearing her thoughts and smiles at Nate who is munching on his fist.
Tony keeps his hand on her shoulder another couple of seconds to ground her, then lets his hand fall to his side
She nods at him in gratitude for the small gesture of comfort
He nods back and turns away to unpack his stuff
Would having Clint back help? He wonders. Of course it’d help, the only question is how soon can he make it happen? He’s been working on the pardons for Clint and the Ant-Guy for almost three months, starting just after ending his recovery post open-heart surgery. His heart had stopped a couple of times in the trip back from Siberia, his sternum had to be replaced and his ribs reconstructed. But the major surgery was to put the Arc Reactor back in, as some shards of metal from the suit had imbedded themselves near his heart, but were too small to be taken out. After he had been cleared by the doctors (read: after he had had enough of physical therapy) he had gone to his workshop first thing and the startling realization that he still had the suit from Siberia- cracked, broken, made him shudder. So he destroyed the it. It wasn’t worth upgrading, it was almost completely destroyed and he didn’t want a reminder of the fight. Still he had kept the helmet. Funnily enough, the glass of the helmet’s left ‘eye’- the same glass that had pierced his skin, the same glass that had cut through nerves and muscle, the same glass that had rendered his left eye blind, the same glass that could have dug just a little teeny tiny bit deeper to kill him-
He shakes his head almost violently to get away from his own thoughts. He should really stop getting sidetracked in his own thought process, but after the Civil Disaster he finds it difficult to focus.
Anyway
The glass in the left eye socket was missing, dried blood -just a couple of shades darker than the suit’s red- surrounding the socket, the socket itself cracked and caved in, leaving a glaring black hole in its place.
Most people would find it wrong, maybe even twisted to keep such a gruesome reminder of what he lost
He finds it hilarious
The shrill sound of his ringtone makes him jump and drop the screwdriver.
He takes his phone out of his jeans’ back pocket and is about to answer the call when a sudden wave of dread sweeps over him, making his gut clench and his lungs constrict.
He takes a deep breath
He answers the phone
His breath comes out in a rush and he almost throws the phone against the wall, stopping himself at the last moment, letting his hand fall to his side and clenching his fists.
The rogues have escaped