Nurture

"Bucky, what you're asking of me, I… are you sure you want to do this?" Wanda questions. "I'm willing to help you in whatever way you want me to, but… is this really something you want to find out the answer to?"

Is this something he wants to know the answer to? Well… technically yes and no. But he must find out what happened that night, no matter how bad it may turn out being.

"Wanda, I need to know what happened on the night of May 29th 1970." He says. "And, you're the only one that can help me remember."

He can't do it on his own. He's already tried, but nothing has seemed to work. So his only option is to ask Wanda for help.

Something important happened that night, but he just can't figure out what. All he's named to remember, is the date, and nothing else. How the date of all things is the only thing he can remember though, he's not got the faintest idea.

But the date, Friday the 29th of May 1970 just stands out to him for some reason.

"May 29th?" Wanda asks. "Isn't that Tony's birthday?"

Is that Tony's birthday? Bucky doesn't know. But he does remember that on that night Hydra had ordered him to kill Howard and Maria Stark and bring their newborn child back with him, so maybe it is Tony's birthday. He does think it was the day or a few days after Tony was born though, considering there was a baby, and he was ordered to bring the child back with him. For whatever reason, he's not sure, but he's hoping that he'll be able to find that out soon enough.

"Uh, maybe? I remember there being a newborn baby there." He says. "Wanda… can you help me with this? Please. I just need to know what happened that night."

Wanda is quiet, and Bucky begins to worry that she won't help him figure this out. Until she sighs.

"Okay." She says, nodding. "I'll help you."

Sighing in relief upon hearing that she'll help him with this, Bucky pulls her in for a tight hug. "Thank you, Wanda."

******

Bucky sits at the table listening as Wanda explains to him and Steve what she'll be doing in order to go into his mind to bring this missing memory back. Something about hypnotism, and some other methods that Bucky isn't sure he's ever even heard of before.

But this is what has to be done, and he trusts that Wanda knows what she's doing.

"You sure about this?" Sam asks. "Seems kinda risky."

"I have to know what happened that night." Bucky sighs, he looks over at Sam, who's holding Francis in his arms. "You don't mind watching Francis while we do this?"

Sam shakes his head. "Course not." He says. "I'll keep the kid entertained for you. Maybe take him out to get an ice-cream."

"That would be great, Sam. Thank you." Bucky says.

He's glad that Sam is willing to look after Francis while they take care of this. He's not sure what'll happen exactly when Wanda does her thing, but he'd rather Francis not be here when she does it.

"I just hope you know what you're doing, man." Sam says, before glancing over at Wanda. "Not that I don't think you know what you're doing, Wanda. But… this seems a little risky. And maybe there's good reason to why this memory is missing."

"I agree, but if Bucky wants something, then there's not much point talking him out of it." Steve says.

At Steve's words, Bucky turns to look at him, raising an eyebrow. "Sure you don't have us mixed up, Steve?" He asks. "That sounds more like you than it does me."

He's not going to forget in a hurry the amount of times Steve tried to enlist in the army many years ago when he really shouldn't have done. The amount of times he broke the law by forging paperwork just because he wanted to fight for his country despite not being physically capable of doing so….

While Bucky admires his commitment, he still is a little pissed at Steve for that. Though if he hadn't, then they wouldn't be here right now. Their son wouldn't even exist if Steve hadn't been so fucking stubborn back then.

"Well…" Steve trails off.

He must admit that Bucky is right with that. He won't go admitting it out loud, but he's worse than Bucky is when it comes to getting what he wants.

"Well, okay then." Sam says. "Still not sure if it's a good idea to go digging, but if it's what you believe you have to do, then… so be it."

Bucky appreciates Sam's concern, but he believes it's what he has to do. He needs to know what happened, and he trusts that Wanda knows what she's doing. And he doesn't trust anyone but Wanda to do this. Though he also doesn't know of anyone else who is capable of doing what she can do.

"Alright, well, I'm gonna take the kid out to the park and get him some ice-cream afterwards." Sam says, before turning his attention to Francis in his arms. "You like the sound of that?"

"Yes!" Francis exclaims, joy written all over his features. "I want ice-cream!"

Sam laughs at his enthusiasm. "Alright!" He says, before turning to head down the hall towards Francis's room to get the two year old ready to go out. "Now let's go get you ready so we can go out while your mommy, daddy, and Wanda can do what they need to."

And as soon as Sam has gotten Francis ready and left the apartment, Wanda stands up, looking towards Steve and Bucky as they too get up. "Where do you want to do this?" She asks.

Bucky looks over at Steve. "Our bedroom I guess?" He suggests. "Will that do?"

Wanda nods. "That'll be fine." She says. "Just as long as you can lay somewhere comfortable for this."

On his and Steve's bed in their bedroom it is. That'll be the most comfortable place for this to happen.

All having the same idea, they make their way down the hall and into the bedroom, and Bucky gets seated in the middle of his and Steve's bed, watching as Wanda gets on the bed next to him.

"Just lay down on the bed and relax." Wanda instructs, gently pushing Bucky down to lay on his back on the bed as she kneels on the bed next to him.

Steve hangs back, leaning against the wall on the opposite side of their bedroom from their bed, arms crossed as he watches Wanda talk Bucky through what she's going to be doing.

In truth, while Steve trusts that Wanda knows what she's doing, he's a little unsure about this. Bucky may want to find out what had happened, but maybe there's a reason he can't remember. Maybe whatever had happened that night is something that he shouldn't go looking for.

Unfortunately, if there's something Bucky wants to do, then there isn't really much point in talking him out of it. Although Bucky is nowhere near as stubborn as Steve himself is….

"Alright. Close your eyes and relax." Wanda says, just as a sort of red mist starts to firm from her fingertips and clouds around Bucky. "Relax, and cast your mind back to the night of May 29th 1970…."

***May 29th 1970***

The soldier looks up as the door of his cell is opened, and in walks his handler, reeking of tobacco, and carrying a beige folder. The soldier knows this to be of his next mission. His handler never comes into his cell unless it’s for a mission, or for something more pleasurable.

Pleasurable only for the handler. The soldier finds no pleasure in what his handler does to him late at night. At least he thinks it’s late at night when he comes in. He’s only ever allowed out when on missions, otherwise he’s kept in his cell, or frozen in cryo.

For the past eight months though, he’s not been frozen in cryo. His handler and the rest of Hydra have kept him out because of his pregnancy. He’s not sure what number this pregnancy is, but he knows that as soon as the child is born, he’ll never see it again. Hydra will take it from him, and do whatever it is they did with all the rest that survived.

Whatever it is they use them for though, he has no idea. He’s not authorised to know. All he’s used for, is to kill whoever they need him to, and to give them children.

“Soldat.” His handler speaks, stopping in front of him.

The soldier stands, not breaking eye contact with his handler once, nor speaking a word. He knows the punishment that’ll give him.

His handler begins listing off his next mission, speaking in Russian, and the soldier does all he can do. Listen intently and obey his orders.

He’s to go to the home of Howard and Maria Stark, and terminate them.

He cannot speak up about going out on a mission at eight months, nearly nine months pregnant. He knows what that’ll get him, and it’s not like he hasn’t been sent out on a mission while pregnant before. But as far as his memory will let him know, it’s never been when he’s this far along.

He follows his handler down the hall to the main prep room where other Hydra agents are standing and waiting. Waiting to get him ready for his mission.

A woman walks over to him - an omega from her scent, much like himself - and she strips him down out of his clothes. If you could call what he’s forced to wear clothes. All they give him to wear when he’s out of cryo and not on a mission, is a tattered shirt and pair of pants - both extremely thin with holes everywhere.

The woman examines him, before turning to two other men in the room. She speaks to them in Russian, but the soldier isn’t paying attention to what she’s saying, as two other women and a man make their way over to him, leading him away where they get him into his clothes and gear for the mission.

His handler shows up by his side just as they’ve finished strapping him up, and he takes him from them, giving him everything else he needs for his mission, before sending him on his way.

***

The soldier stops halfway down the street from the residence of Howard and Maria Stark. He hides his motorbike behind some bushes, and makes the rest of the way on foot, keeping out of sight and not drawing any attention to himself.

He scopes out the outside of the house for any security hanging around, and quickly shoots any down that he sees, before finding his way inside undetected.

Climbing through the kitchen window, he manages to not make any of as little sound as possible, and looks around the room once he's inside. There's a calendar on one wall with today's date marked as Friday the 29th of May in the year 1970.

Ignoring the sudden cramps that run through his body, he turns towards the doorway leading off into the hallway. And he stalks off through the house in search of his targets; Howard and Maria Stark.

He knows what these cramps are though. He's not an idiot. He knows what's likely going to happen soon. But his mission comes first. It always does.

Finding the Starks is surprisingly easier than he first anticipated. They’re both seated on the couch in the living room, completely unaware of his presence in the doorway behind them.

This should be much easier than he first thought then. All he needs to do is shoot them both, then leave.

Unfortunately, his body has other plans….

His gun drops to the floor with a loud crash, alerting both Howard and Maria, and he doubles over on the floor as a much more intense wave of pain shoots through him, and he feels the wetness between his legs soaking through his pants.

He’s gone into labor.

He doesn’t pay attention as Howard shouts for someone, and he barely notices that Maria has grabbed his gun off the floor and is now pointing it in his direction.

“What the… Sergeant Barnes ?” He only just hears Howard say.

And who the hell is this Sergeant Barnes? And why does that name sound so familiar to him?

“ Bucky ?” Howard asks.

The soldier looks up at him. “Who the fuck is Bucky?” He manages, before letting out a shout of pain, collapsing onto his side.

“Howard, I… I think he’s in labor.” The soldier only just hears Maria say.

“Get this fucking thing out of me!” The soldier shouts, his mission momentarily forgotten in his need to make the pain go away.

He barely takes any notice of two men lifting him off the floor and into another room, where he’s placed on a bed and stripped out of his gear.

Whatever happens after that, he cannot remember, as after he’s given birth, he blacks out.

***

The soldier expects to be back in his cell by the time he wakes, so the soft mattress under him and the warm welcoming room around him certainly comes as a surprise.

He sits up, looking around, finding that he’s handcuffed to the metal bars of the bed, and that Howard Stark is sitting on a chair next to the bed, looking as though he’s seen a ghost.

“ How are you even alive?” Is the first thing Howards asks him. “Rogers told us all you fell from the train almost thirty years ago.”

The soldier doesn’t answer, just stares at the man next to him. The man he was sent to kill. But… something inside him is preventing him from killing him. Something in the back of his mind is stopping him from breaking free of his restraints and snapping the man’s neck.

Something in the back of his mind is screaming at him not to hurt Howard Stark.

“But here you are, Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes.” Howard continues. “Alive, and right out of giving birth to a baby boy.”

Baby boy?

Realization comes crashing down over the soldier. He was pregnant, and it may seem as though he’s already given birth, but the baby is nowhere to be seen. Not that that surprises him. He’s never allowed to see any of the children after he’s given birth.

He looks down at his body, now covered in a soft white dressing gown. His stomach is still protruding ever so  slightly, but he suspects that it’ll be back to being flat in no time, especially in Hydra’s care. There’s also a dull ache between his legs, but that’s the least of his concerns.

Though who the hell is Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, and why is Howard addressing him as such. He has no name. Although somehow, a part of him hidden deep down inside him, feels like he knows who Sergeant Jaes Buchanan Barnes is.

“Your child is safe.” Howard says.

“Keep it.” The soldier say before Howard can say another word. “They’ll take it and I’ll never see it again just like all the rest.”

It’ll be for the best if Howard and Maria keep the child. The child will have a better life with them.

Which means that he won’t be doing any killing tonight. He won’t be killing Howard and Maria Stark tonight. Some long forgotten part inside him is preventing him from doing so, but he doesn’t know why.

And he’ll have to take all of Hydra’s punishments once he gets back. He’ll have to figure out a lie to tell them about the child. He’ll tell them that he gave birth during the mission, but the child was born dead so he had to dispose of it.

Howard looks surprised. “ They ?” He asks. “Who’s they ?”

“The ones in charge.” The soldier says. “Hydra’s higher ups. They control what happens to the ones who live.”

The soldier isn’t sure what’s possessing him to tell Howard all of this. He’s got no idea why he’s not just keeping his mouth shut, or just breaking free of his restraints and killing the man like he’s supposed to.

“Hydra?” Howard asks, sitting back on the chair. “Dear god, they must’ve got to you after you fell.” He says. “We should’ve listened to Rogers when he tried to organize a search and rescue….”

The soldier has no idea what the hell he’s talking about. When did he fall? Why does he seem to know who he is? And who the hell is this Rogers person?

“I suppose they sent you here to kill me then?” Howard asks. “Is that why you’re here, Barnes? To kill me?”

The soldier doesn’t answer, just stares at him. Not saying another word. He’s said enough already. He’s said too much.

He barely pays any attention as Maria enters the room.

“Howard, what’s going on?” She asks. “What are we supposed to do with him and the child?”

“He wants us to keep the child.” Howard says. “It’s what the old James Barnes would’ve wanted, so we’re keeping it.” He turns to the soldier. “Got any names, old boy?”

The soldier doesn’t speak. He never has any say in what happens to the children Hydra makes him have, or what their names should be, so why should he now?

“How about Anthony?” Howard asks, realizing that he likely won’t get a reply. “What do you think, dear? Can be Tony for short.” He says. “Tony Stark has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

******

Bucky sits up abruptly on the bed, waking out of the slumber Wanda had placed him in. His heart pounding at what he has discovered. Tony Stark…. Tony fucking Stark is his son? 

His sudden movement causes Wanda to jump back, breaking her concentration, but she’s quick to compose herself once more and shift around on the bed next to Bucky so she’s facing him more.

“Bucky, what did you see?” She asks. “What happened?”

Bucky doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t even know what to say. This new revelation… it’s not what he was expecting, but at the same time, it feels… right?

Steve rushes over to Bucky’s side, kneeling next to the bed. “Buck, what is it?” He asks. “What did you see?”

Bucky turns to him, eyes wide. “I-I….” He starts, but is at a loss for words, unsure of how to tell Steve the news that Tony is his son.

He’s having a hard time trying to process all of this, but it’s true. Every part of it, and now that he’s seen it, he knows in his heart that it’s all true. Tony is one of the children Hydra forced him to have, and he gave birth to him on May 29th 1970. The night he was supposed to kill Howard and Maria Stark.

Only, how is he supposed to explain that to Steve?

How the fuck is he supposed to explain it to Tony ?

Either way, they need to know. Their reactions to the news though, he can’t even begin to imagine how that’ll go down. Especially Tony’s reaction.

God, how will Tony react to this? Tony already hates him enough as it is, and this is undoubtedly just going to add onto that hatred.

As Bucky doesn’t give Steve an answer, he turns to Wanda. He’s beginning to have doubts if this even worked at all.

“How are we supposed to know if this worked?” He asks.

Wanda looks at him. “It should have worked, but…” She starts, shaking her head, her gaze falling onto Bucky. “Bucky, tell us what happened.”

“It did work, and I… I remember what happened that night.” Bucky says, looking from Wanda to Steve, then back to Wanda. “Tony… Tony he’s….”

“Tony? What about Tony?” Steve asks. “Bucky, what is it?”

Bucky looks at him. “Steve… Tony is my son.” He says. “He’s one of the children Hydra made me have.”

Both Steve and Wanda grow silent, unsure of what to make about this revelation. Bucky has just told them that Tony Stark is his son. Tony is one of the children that Hydra had forced him to have.

“What?”