Piecing Together

Bucky was having the last face to face appointment with the psychiatrist that Tony had brought in. Once he was out of the Tower, he would have the psychiatrist's number in case he needed it. Though Bucky had already said he wasn't sure if he'd want or need to talk to them after. Not that he felt all good, just it felt weird talking to a stranger. Steve understood, and told Bucky, he could text or call him any time, instead. Steve was happy Bucky had made such progress, but he also hated that it meant he would not be able to see him again for a couple of weeks. Even though Steve knew he had a bunch of stuff to do, trying to sort out this Halloween thing, which looked more and more to be tied into whatever Thor and Jane had been following. Jane had found there was a decided spike in energy, as well as some kind of disturbance around the City on Halloween night. The closest she could get was a couple hours window since it had been data collected while she wasn't monitoring her equipment, or extrapolated from some other means. Steve didn't understand most of the lingo the scientists used. But the time frame of the disturbance was around the same time as the early part of the party. Tony had started wondering if that was why there was a moment of static on the footage.

While Bucky was at his appointment, Steve took the time to sit down with Jarvis' footage from Halloween. Using the computer in his and Bucky's temporary room, Steve followed himself through the footage, arriving, getting stopped by a multitude of people before getting a drink at the bar. Shortly after he'd stopped and talked to Sam for a little bit before they went off in different directions. Steve had asked Sam the other day what they'd talked about, Sam said he wasn't sure anymore, but he felt like it was Darcy they'd talked about. For a while, Steve watched himself wander about the party, trying to avoid long interactions with people, and then he spotted her. Steve watching the footage, and Steve in the footage. Steve in the footage had made his way over. They had seemed to stand close, they chatted for a little while, and then parted in different directions. Steve still didn't know what they talked about, Jarvis could only discern some conversations in the night's footage for anyone.

Steve watched the whole party through a couple times, trying to find anything unusual, and track where people came and went to. It appeared he had left the party shortly after talking to Darcy, before midnight. "Jarvis? Where did I go when I left the Halloween party? Did I talk to anyone else?"

"It would appear you went back to your room. You did not talk to anyone along the way."

"What about once I was home? Can you tell if I did anything strange or notable?" Steve scratched his head, still trying to recall those gaps in his mind.

"My sensor records indicate you were awake in your living and kitchen area for perhaps an hour, then it would seem you retired to bed, Captain Rogers."

"I saw Banner left before eleven. He said he went up to The Room. Can you confirm that?"

"Yes, Captain. Dr. Banner was awake for several hours in The Room before finally falling asleep. He woke late in the morning the next day and went to work."

"Do you mind if we run through most of our key members, when they left, where they went?"

"Of course not. Mr. Stark and Miss Potts were at the party socializing and dancing until just after 2am, they retired to their room. Sleep was not immediate." Steve smiled a little at that as Jarvis continued. "Colonel Rhodes had a couple of beers, told the same three stories to dozens of people, danced for a while with Miss Hill, and departed The Tower around 1am."

"Wait, Jarvis, you said you couldn't pick up most of what anyone said. Did you hear the stories?"

"Yes, Captain Rogers. One of the few things I was able to discern being said during the night were Colonel Rhodes' stories."

That made Steve chuckle a little, "alright, continue, please."

"Very well. Miss Hill had three drinks during the night, and after Colonel Rhodes departed, she spent most of the rest of the evening joking with Mr. Barton, who previously had been playing darts and shooting pool, chatting with an assortment of others during the party. They were among the last to head home, both retiring to their respective rooms after 3am."

When Jarvis seemed to pause there, Steve figured he'd prompt for more people. "What about Sam? What did he do after I spoke to him that night?"

"Mr. Wilson was very sociable. He had two beers, played pool, and went home around 2am."

"And how about Jane and Erik?"

"Dr. Foster spoke a little while to Dr. Selvig, but left not long after Dr. Banner, before 11pm. Dr. Selvig remained, had a drink, socialized, before heading to bed just after 1am."

Steve paused, clearing his throat, "And what about Darcy?"

"Miss Lewis chatted and socialized for a bit, got a drink, and appeared to be people watching before you spoke to her. Then she headed into the crowd and then to bed."

"Do you know what we said? Can you work out any of our conversation?" Steve desperately wanted to know what was said.

There was a long pause, nearly a full minute before Jarvis responded, "I can not. I am sorry, Captain Rogers."

Steve sat a moment thinking, wondering what exactly Darcy did the rest of the night. Before he could ask Jarvis though, his door chimed. "Jarvis, save all this for later and unlock the door, please."

"Certainly."

When the door unlocked and opened, Bucky came in. "Hey. If I'm interrupting anything, I can go to the gym or something."

"No, no, I just didn't want other interruptions, so I locked the door." Steve had been sitting forward at the computer but leaned back into the chair as Bucky closed the door and sat down on his bed.

"Are you really okay, Steve? Some days, I don't know, you look almost as messed up as me." Bucky was still piecing things together, but one of the things he seemed to be able to do already, or still, was see right through Steve. It had always been like that. Steve remembered clearly, though Bucky only had a feeling that was how it had worked.

"I don't know, Buck. There's a lot going on. I am here for you, for anything you need though, okay. I can handle it." Steve straightened up again, his posture firm.

"I'm not worried about that, I mean, I'm worried about you, shouldering everything. You always did that, I remember that much. I'm just, I am here too. I know I'm a mess, but if I can help you, I will." Bucky shook his head, glancing to the floor a moment before looking back over at Steve.

There was a weak, sad smile on Steve's face, and he snickered slightly. "See, I knew the Bucky I knew was still in there somewhere among the rest. Right now, the best thing you can do for me is to keep getting better. Keep finding yourself, and who you are now." Steve took a deep inhale and let it out before continuing, "Because I do need you. No one else can read me quite the way you do. There maybe are things, that I wish I could tell someone, but I just can't unload that right now."

Bucky nodded, his hands flexing and squeezing against the edge of the bed. He worried that he'd made a bigger mess for Steve here. Everyone had been really nice, but Bucky couldn't help remembering that Thor hadn't even been told he was here, that they'd apparently locked down the upper floors from everyone except a few select people. All because of him. It seemed like a lot of work, effort, and headache, for him. He still wasn't sure he was worth it.

Steve had been staring off out the window, only once there was a long silence, did he look over at Bucky again, seeing him staring at the floor. "Are you really sure you're ready to go? Because I could probably see about having you stay a little longer."

Bucky looked up and shook his head. "No, I need to keep moving forward. And figuring this out is the next step. The psychiatrist even mentioned it. So, they all think I'm ready."

"But do you think you're ready?" Steve understood the whys of having Bucky move somewhere, away from The Tower, and why he couldn't move with him. The idea was so no one would notice Bucky was anything other than some random guy. And Bucky could take the time to try to heal some more, without press or the government or anyone else prodding into things or trying to control anything. But Steve really, really hated that he wouldn't see Bucky for a few weeks. That he'd only be able to text him for the most part. Steve was glad for that much, but it didn't stop him from worrying. He didn't want Bucky to slip further, to struggle more than he already was.

"I'll be alright, Steve." Bucky's definition of alright in this situation probably wasn't what other people's might be. But, he did figure he'd get by. And maybe being alone with his thoughts would help. He'd been doing okay before Steve found him, starting to organize the pieces he could remember. The last couple weeks, he'd been remembering a lot more little things. Hopefully, that would continue, even without Steve around.

"I do want to help you. And I want to tell you what's going on. But I don't want it cluttering up your healing process right now. Especially when I've got a bunch of questions myself on just what's happening." The last thing Steve wanted was to let down his best friend, to leave him hanging to fend for himself when he was hurting. And while Steve may not have always caught Bucky's pain the way Bucky seemed to see his, he still knew his friend was not exactly okay by any stretch of the word.

"I know, and you are. Far more than I ever expected." Bucky's gaze shifted from Steve to the windows. "I guess I can't help worrying about you. I heard enough bits and pieces of whatever is going on around here that doesn't have to do with me, to be concerned. Beings from other realms who have maybe gone rogue, and are possibly messing with you, and your friends. I know you're strong now, Steve. But that sounds like a lot even for you, and all your friends."

Steve let out a sigh, the fact that Bucky worried about him still, it was warmer on his heart than he'd expected. "I know it does. And I am worried about just what we're possibly coming up against. Thor at least thinks he's narrowing the field on who might be behind what's happening. And he doesn't think his remaining candidates want to kill people. Of course, they might also not be bothered by casualties. He thinks his top choices all are more the 'want to rule over all' sorts." Steve knew that could still be trouble, given Thor said he'd have put Loki in that category, and Loki trying to take over Earth had been a bit of a disaster.

"I guess that's something, at least they probably aren't aiming to kill everyone." Bucky half snickered, and Steve did the same. The two half smiled at each other. "Will you tell me though, if there is actually anything useful I can do to help you and your friends?"

"If it seems like we could use an extra hand, I'll let you know. And I will text you, as often as I can. Hopefully every day, as long as I'm not mid-chase on something. I'll keep you updated on everything." Steve smiled a little more at the nod Bucky gave him. "And please let me know how you're doing. Speaking of which, how have the computer lessons with Tony been?"

"Even if I don't hear from you, I'll text you once a day to just let you know how I'm doing. As for the lessons, he said I picked up enough to actually do the job I'm pretending to be doing, in case anyone asks me. There are definitely strange fragments of things Hydra taught me for missions that I keep remembering. I guess the Winter Soldier had needed to know some computer hacking at one point in time." Bucky didn't recall all the details of the missions he'd done, the only clear recalls from his time as The Winter Soldier, were the names and faces of the people he killed.

"That would be good. I might be out of the Tower after you leave, but there will be someone here to keep tabs. Probably will be Sam, since he isn't really an Avenger yet, he just helps me. Tony and I are still debating just who should know where you are. We think it's safer the less people who know." Steve was being cautious. He did think that with enough time and work, and collective assurances from professionals, that Bucky could be allowed to be totally free, to choose whatever he wanted to do. They just had to show that the Winter Soldier, the assassin for Hydra, was no longer in there.

It was things like that, that made Bucky a little uneasy. That his location had to be so secret. It made him worry that he would never be truly allowed to be free. That someone would always be controlling him and his choices. He just nodded though.