Double-O-Godmother
God, Nick Fury's lectures are the worst. As if Peter hasn't already learned what it means to be a hero, and as if he needs to hear it from the guy who lost his eye to a space-cat. As he walked out in his frustrated silence, with nothing but the Ramones as company, he was hoping the SHIELD interventions (more like interruptions) could "end for the day.
His hopes were dashed when he bumped into a SHIELD agent while he was turning the corner. Using his Spider-Sense to help him catch the folder he'd made them drop, he resigned himself to what will likely be a long-winded chewing out from another tightly knit "super secret spy."
"Sorry about that, mister… wait, who are you?" Peter looked up to meet the stern look of some really pissed off agent. He vaguely recognized her, but he couldn't really place her face. Last he checked, he wasn't Prosopagnostic, so if he has met her, it would have been a very long time ago. Either way, his Spider-Sense was definitely buzzing now. Typical SHIELD paranoia must be setting in on her.
"I-I'm… j-just, Director Fury wanted to see me for some meeting, so I came here because I was scared of not listening to him. SHIELD is terrifying, and I don't know what he might do to me if I didn't come and tell him what he wanted to know, so I just came and told him everything I knew about dying in the snap and fighting Thanos and all that, and how Tony died-"
"Okay!" She was feeling pretty frazzled by his persistent ramblings, and was looking forward to ending the conversation. She wasn't even going to ask him about his involvement with Thanos, because it's New York after 10 years of non-stop bullshit. "Well, if that's the case sir, then I should get goin-"
"Actually," The Agent just sighed and resigned herself to the conversation, "have- have we met before?"
She once again resigned herself to this nervous wreck's company. She extended her hand to him. "Agent Maria Hill."
"P-Peter," he said, shaking her hand, "Peter Parker. Spider-Man, since Director Fury probably would have told you anyway. I swear, he has no concept of privacy."
"Hang on," she said, taking her hand back, "what did you say?"
Time for another lecture on being too young for the superhero job. Hooray! "Yeah, I'm Spider-Man. Please, don't make a big deal of it."
"No," she responded urgently, "what did you say your name was?"
"Um, Peter Parker?"
She put her hands on Peter's shoulders and looked him in the eyes. There was a sense of nostalgia- maybe a hint of shakespearian despair- in her face. "Oh god. Is that really you, Peter? It's been years…"
"So I do know you?"
"Not exactly." She took a deep breath in to prepare herself for the explanation to come. "Your parents, Richard and Mary Parker, were… they were SHIELD agents."
"What? I mean, I always figured they had some secret agenda for why they left when I was a kid, but… they were SHIELD?"
"They were my best friends. I loved them as much as I've loved anyone. I first met you when you were a baby. Barely 3 months. I was so happy for them. Which is why I tried to convince them to stop with SHIELD business. I guess you got your self-destructive sense of righteousness from them." She chuckled fondly. It was the most emotional he'd ever seen a SHIELD operative. Then again, she was practically family if she had been watching over him since he was a baby. "They left for their last mission shortly after you turned 2. They were sabotaged by an undercover Hydra agent, and their jet crashed on the way back."
"Huh… I kinda thought they just left. Not that I wanted them to be, but I never believed everyone saying they'd died in an accident."
"Your parents would have never abandoned you. I really did try to stop them from going on more missions." And it suddenly seemed that all her SHIELD training disappeared and gave way to pure maternal instinct. She hugged Peter. Enough was conveyed through the hug to communicate all her regret and sadness at the loss of her friends, and her guilt over the death of Peter's parents.
"How come you didn't recognize me," Peter asked through the hug. It was actually pretty nice. And there was nobody here aside from the occasional SHIELD personnel that was deterred by Agent Hill's deadly glare. "I thought SHIELD kept tabs on everybody."
"Actually, your parents had it listed specifically in their will that we don't. They wanted you to live a normal life, away from prying eyes," she paused thinking on his reveal of being Spider-Man. "You can tell how that turned out. I'm so sorry that you're burdened with this superhero bull… krud."
"You can say shit, I'm 17." Hill actually laughed at the retort. "And don't be sorry about me being Spider-Man. It was my choice. I let Uncle Ben down, and I need to start using these powers for what they should be put towards."
"Oh Ben. I wish I could've attended the funeral, but I wanted to honor Richard and Mary's request to the T. Guess that's kind of out the window now. Y'know," she chuckled dryly, "I actually offered to be your godmother after your parents died. But after the will was read, I changed my mind. It was for the best. Ben and May did an amazing job." She ruffled his hair and picked up her folders. "Now, I need to have a word with Director Fury about your involvement with SHIELD. I still want to keep you out of his hands."
"Okay," he said brightly, hugging her again. The woman was happy about it, "I should get going too. Oh, and thank you… for telling me about my parents. Nice to have some closure."
"No problem, Pete. By the way, remember that old stuffed Tiger you had? All me," she said, winking and jerking a thumb towards herself. "And for what it's worth, Rich and Mary would be proud. So proud. I love you, Peter. Bye."
Peter left feeling a lot lighter than he did when he had gotten out of Fury's lecture about power and repsonsibility- the two things he knows plenty about. The next thing he heard while leaving was a loud yell from a voice down the hall.
"NICHOLAS JOSEPH FURY, WHAT THE FUCK?"
He laughed so hard it hurt.