“I don’t think I can tell them, MJ. I mean, I intern for Tony flippin’ Stark. What if he doesn’t want me to intern for him anymore?” My face fell as I flung myself back onto my bed. MJ scoffed and she was standing over me quickly. Our . . . whatever it is that we were had happened in rapid succession ever since she figured out that I was Spider-Man. I should’ve known it would be hard to keep secrets from her. She’s far too smart for her own good. I sighed as I gazed back up at her narrowed eyes, they looked adorable and frightening.
“I highly doubt that happens, but if it does then Ned and I will be there to back you up.” I could hear Ned hum his agreement as he messed with my computer, keeping his hands busy. I nodded, but then more fear gripped my heart. I groaned and tossed an arm over my eyes.
“Oh God, what is May going to say? Not to mention, Pepper is going to think it’s a PR nightmare. The reporters already had a field day when they announced my internship. I can see the headlines now.” My wrists were gripped tightly in MJ’s hands as she attempted to lift my body. A piece of me knew that I was overreacting, but at the moment I didn’t really care. I wanted nothing more than to take my words back and tell them all that I had nothing to tell them. That I hadn’t been keeping a secret. MJ’s voice was gentle this time as she spoke,
“Peter, look at me. Everything is going to be okay. May is still going to love you and Pepper will definitely not think that,” She sat down beside me and wrapped an arm over my shoulder before continuing, “Listen, I know this is scary. It’s certainly not an easy thing to do, but we are with you. You also know you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. We can think of something else to tell them so they don’t become suspicious.”
“She’s right, dude. If you only want it to be us that know then that’s all that matters. We won’t tell anyone.” Ned offered me a small encouraging smile, but my Stark phone dinged with a message saying that Happy was waiting for us outside. I groaned softly, but stood, gripping my backpack tightly. It had my suit inside in case I needed to make a quick break for it out of the compound. I flashed my phone to Ned and MJ and shoved it in my pocket.
“It’s too late now. Happy’s waiting for us downstairs.”
“We’re with you, loser.” MJ squeezed my arm as we made our way out of mine and May’s small apartment. Her nose scrunched cutely as Ned’s hand clasped my shoulder comfortingly. I tried to smile, but my stomach kept churning and I was terrified that I was going to throw up. The car came into view and Happy was standing there, waiting expectantly. I wanted to turn around and go back upstairs, but MJ grabbed my hand tightly as Ned kept his hand on my shoulder.
“Calm down, Peter. We were expected to show up for dinner regardless of whether you tell them or not.” Ned’s voice was just loud enough for my sensitive hearing as he shot Happy a smile. Happy stared at the three of them curiously, his eyes roving over me. I couldn’t tell if he saw how stiffly I was moving. I rolled my shoulders and tried to relax, taking a couple of deep breaths. We crawled into the back and as Happy pulled away from the curb, he glanced into the rearview mirror.
“We’ve got to pick up May as well so we’re stopping off at the hospital before we head to the compound.” I sent him a quick thumbs up as I settled between my two friends for the semi long drive.
It was not a long drive. It felt like a very short drive. Once we had picked up May and she had given us a big smile, looking very pretty out of her scrubs, my stomach dropped again. She was smiling because she had no idea what I needed to tell her and I had absolutely no way of knowing whether she would accept me. MJ’s hand was tight on my knee when she heard my breath hitch as we pulled into the compound’s garage. The three of us filed out of the backseat and May pulled me into a tight hug.
“What have you three been up to today? Staying out of trouble, I hope.” She sent me a pointed look as she spoke and my mouth went dry. Ned spoke, garnering her attention,
“We marathoned the Harry Potter movies today and may have eaten all of your popcorn.” Ned attempted a sheepish look as May pinched his cheek lightly.
“That sounds like fun. Don’t worry Ned; we can always buy more popcorn.” I grabbed onto MJ’s hand as we all loaded into the elevator, Friday’s voice greeting us,
“Mr. Stark is waiting for all of you in his private dining area with Ms. Potts, shall I send you up?”
“Yes, thank you, Friday.” Happy spoke succinctly as May gave him a soft look that made me do a double take. I tried to ignore him as he leaned over to tell my aunt how nice she looked, and my cheeks were burning. This was a new development that I would have to discuss with May later, if I could stomach it. Also if I survived the dinner. I hated my powers some days. I looked up at the ceiling and I could hear Ned trying to hold in a snigger behind me.
We stepped into Tony’s private living area and found him standing there with Pepper straightening his shirt collar. He grinned widely as we all flooded in as Pepper pulled May into a hug. Tony ruffled my hair slightly, which made me want to sink into the floor. After everything in Germany went down and was cleared up followed by our close brush with Thanos, Mr. Stark and I had steadily grown closer. My cheeks were flushed as MJ held back a smirk.
“About time you got here, kiddo. I hear we have some things to talk about.” He sent me a wink and I felt the blood drain from my face and I stopped in my tracks, stuttering,
“W-what do yo – you mean?” Tony frowned lightly as he cocked his head slightly to the side.
“Your new web fluid upgrades. You told me you had some ideas about making it last a longer.” Relief flooded my body as I realized that he, in fact, hadn’t figured out my secret. I could feel his eyes scrutinizing me as I took a place in between him and MJ. I knew that I needed to calm down and do it quickly or we would all be having this conversation sooner rather than later. MJ offered me a look and gestured to take a deep breath. I could feel Tony watching the entire exchange, but I didn’t look at him until I was calm enough. I offered him a big smile, which seemed to appease him slightly.
Dinner was going smoothly. I talked with Tony about the web fluid with occasional input from MJ and Ned. Pepper, Happy, and May were all talking about work and how they all needed a vacation. I tuned in to hear May mentioning the affordability aspect of a vacation and felt guilt clench tightly around my stomach. Tony grabbed my attention once more after MJ gripped my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. I gave her a soft smile. When everyone was through eating we all moved to the lounge to continue our conversations. Tony pulled out a Starkpad and we got to work developing some of the formulas to work on later. When Pepper pulled him away for a split moment Ned and MJ leaned in close to me.
“Have you decided on if you’re going to tell them?” MJ quirked a brow questioningly and I shook my head slightly.
“I want to tell them, but I’m still worried.”
“We’re right here with you, Peter.” Ned offered me a small encouraging smile and nudged my shoulder gently. I nodded to them and waited until Tony came back with Pepper. Before I could talk myself out of it, I stood and grabbed everyone’s attention.
“I need to talk to all of you about something. It’s something I’ve kept from all of you because I wasn’t sure how to actually say it and and I’ve been trying to figure it out for myself not to mention that –“ I had begun pacing lightly, my hands gesturing and trembling every so often.
“Peter.” MJ cut in to stop my rambling that I usually did when I got nervous and I took a few deep breaths.
“Peter sweetie, you’re worrying me. What’s wrong?” May’s voice was urgent and a little bit scared. It made my nerves bristle as I hurriedly tried to reassure her.
“Nothing! It’s nothing, aunt May it’s just – ugh. Why is this so hard?” I groaned and ran a hand through my hair as four pairs of eyes were flashing concern in my direction. My throat was tight as I looked through the room for my backpack. MJ minutely shook her head when she caught on to what I was looking for. I ran my hands through my hair again and then Tony was leading me to the chair to sit down.
“Why don’t you take a second to collect yourself? Have a seat and breathe.” I wasn’t going to lie, having his hand on my shoulder was grounding and comforting; Tony was more often than not the father figure I needed lately and I didn’t want to screw anything up with him. Once I was seated, he kneeled in front of me. His eyes were searching my face, crinkled at the corners.
“Peter, whatever it is you want to tell us you can. We won’t be upset – well unless it’s something bad then I might be pretty upset.” May’s voice was soft as Pepper nodded her head. Happy looked concerned, which wasn’t exactly a look I was used to seeing on his face. Usually it was minor annoyance or exasperation when I was involved. I shook myself and took another deep breath. It was shaky, and I hated that. I steeled my shoulders.
“Okay, here it goes. What I’ve been trying to tell you is thatI’mbisexual.” They all frowned and MJ looked as if she wanted to smack herself in the head. Tony spoke first,
“What did you say? You need to speak clearly, Pete.” All of their concentration was on me again.
“S-sorry. What I meant to say is that I am bisexual. I I like girls and, uh uh, well, I also like guys.” I bit my lip as I watched their faces, which were shocked, but none of them were saying anything. I looked at MJ and Ned, fear cold in my chest. They continued to look at me without speaking and I began tapping my foot on the floor. My backpack was waiting for me at the end of the coffee table. If I bolted I would be able to grab it easily, but Tony would probably have Friday go through lockdown protocol. I tugged at the collar of my shirt, sweat beading along my forehead. Was it getting hot in here? I couldn’t breathe.
“-eter! Peter, are you listening to me?” A hand waved in front of my face startling me. I found aunt May and Tony kneeling in front of me. My brow furrowed because it looked as if they were vibrating. I looked passed them and found MJ’s eyes. They were soft and concerned, but Ned seemed to be holding her back, letting the adults handle me. My eyes roamed back to Tony has he waved another hand in front of me.
“C’mon underoos, you need to breathe for us. You gotta calm down.” There was fear on Tony’s face and May was biting her lip nervously. It hit me then that I was the one shaking, not them. I found Tony’s eyes again and found him taking deep, slow breaths. He took my hand and placed over the scars where his arc reactor used to be. I began to try and match my breathing with his, my other hand clenching over his. This was something we had been doing ever since my run in with Toomes. My panic attacks had been pretty bad afterwards, but they’ve gotten better.
“There ya go, kid. Pep, can you grab a glass of water?” May grabbed my attention when she took my hand.
“I love you, Peter. I will never not love you solely because of who you are. I’m so sorry that you didn’t feel like you could tell us.” I wanted to cry and my chest heaved making my breath hitch with a sigh of relief, but I couldn’t help my eyes from straying to Tony. I couldn’t deny that his approval meant a lot to me. There was something behind his blue eyes that just looked sad. He met mine head on and nodded.
“Peter Parker, you love who you love and I wouldn’t dream of not accepting that about you. I’m glad that you finally told us.” Pepper came over with the glass of water and handed it to me, but her hand found purchase in my hair, carding her fingers through it gently.
“We love you, sweetie. Nothing will change that.”
“I’ve got a brother who’s got a boyfriend and last year he had a girlfriend. I’m pretty cool with it, Peter.” Happy’s words almost made me want to laugh and my chest felt less tight. Once I drank my water and calmed down everything was much better. Easier. I felt good knowing that the people that mattered knew. I wouldn’t feel as if I was hiding a piece of me away from them. However, I nearly choked on my water when Tony’s voice perked up,
“So, now that the hard stuff is out of the way are you currently dating anyone?”
“Tony!” Pepper tried to admonish him as Happy and May rolled their eyes. May ran a gentle hand through my hair before sitting back down on the couch.
“What? I want to know these things so I don’t cut into your potential dating time.” Pepper rolled her eyes, but mine flew to MJ, who was blushing lightly.
“Um, there is this girl, and I suppose we’ve sort of been dating. It’s kind of just been a quiet thing, which I’m pretty sure she likes.” I turned my eyes back to Tony, scratching the back of my neck. I didn’t miss the glance he sent MJ’s way, but he kept it short. There was, however, a knowing look on his face. It didn’t take a genius to figure me out. I was pretty smitten after all.
“Okay, okay, I get it, but tell me should things develop. I’m your fa – mentor after all.” Tony cleared his throat and I smirked at aunt May. She was beaming simply happy that I felt better.
She knew about MJ and I, but that was only because she caught me kissing her goodbye once on the rare occasion she picked me up from school. I ignored Tony’s remark to make him feel better, but he was like a father to me. There was no way that I could deny that. I nodded my head to reassure Tony that I would, not missing MJ’s shy smile as she talked with Ned about decathlon. It didn’t take Tony long to move from the subject as he pulled the Starkpad back out.
“Do you want to go over these formulas some more?”
“Definitely!” Tony moved to sit across from me, perching on the coffee table, much to Pepper’s annoyance. Things were quiet again as we all went back to our own conversations. Tony’s hands were animated as he went through the formulas. I couldn’t keep myself from glancing at MJ every now and again. My chest was warm and I felt happy. My family had accepted me and I was sure nothing could top this feeling.