Chapter 1
"This isn't going to work! It was never going to work, okay?" He's breathing hard, hands in his hair pulling in frustration. "We were...god we were trying to play happy couple and it's time to stop. We gotta stop pretending..you don't want me, so let's just quit before...before I fall any further in love with you. Okay?"
There's a long silence and Clint tries to move forward, tries to reach out and comfort the other man only to be flinched away from.
"What do I- what can I say- that will make this better? What do you want me to do, I'll do anything, just...don't do this. Please, after everything, don't end it like this.." Clint tries again to pull Bucky into his arms only to be pushed away weakly, from someone who's given up. "Don't leave me like this. We can fix this."
"Don't. Don't try to talk your way outta this, Barton." Bucky laughs bitterly, eyes wet as he looks anywhere but directly at Clint. "It's okay, I know what it's like to be in love with someone who doesn't give a shit about timing. You've met Steve for Christ's sake. Just..I want you to be happy and I've seen how you look at her. Even when she leaves, you look at her like...I don't know..like she's everything you've ever needed."
The archer can't find anything more to say, doesn't think anything he does say will make a difference. He can't deny anything that's been said and his dumb brain can't figure out how to fix the mess he's gotten himself into.
"When Steve left, I thought that was it for me. He went back to her and I was...damaged goods or whatever. Just more proof that I'm not anything to anyone." The soldier sighed, rubbing his face tiredly. "When Pepper rebuilt this place and invited me to stay, I had a place to belong. And then you started inviting me to the range and I felt like maybe I could do this whole Avenger thing, maybe I could wash my hands of the blood. I let my guard down with you and this is where I end up." He scoffs, biting at his lip anxiously. He's got his arms wrapped around himself like he's trying not to fall apart. "I don't blame you and I don't hate you, I just...I wish...I shouldn't have gotten close. After everything I've done, it was stupid of me to think that I could have something like this. And for me to think that no one had snatched your heart already."
"Bucky...you deserve the world. You deserve so much better than me but fuck am I glad that you chose me. Please don't do this, I don't want you to leave, I need you. I will get on my knees and beg if that's what it'll take, I'll tell her to get the hell out of my life, I'll do anything.. anything. Just tell me what I need to do." Clint tries again to plead for it not to end, moving closer, not touching but wanting to so bad.
Bucky swallows the lump in his throat and closes his eyes briefly to push back the tears. He steps forward and he's got the metal hand over Clint's heart, trying not to clench his shirt but doing it involuntarily anyways. "Don't be stupid, don't fuck it up with her again. And don't follow me." He says quietly before pressing a chaste kiss to the blond's cheek. He's quick to leave, knowing if he stayed for even another second, he'd never would have made it out. He'd fall back into the trap and get his heart broken all over again.