Awake
Dr. Strange was able manipulate time far enough to bring Tony back from the brink of death. Unfortunately he's only capable of so much. He wasn't able to reverse all the damage done. In order to save him he had to direct the majority of the trauma to his right arm. There was nothing he could do to save the limb and had to be amputated. Having contact with the stones for long affected many internal structures on his right side. He was able to reverse most of the damage with the time stone but with abilities could only be pushed so far against the natural order.
He was afraid it wouldn't be enough to save him. They brought him back and Tony has taken everything remarkably well. Even surprising the doctor who'd performed the miraculous surgery. He'd fully expected him to be comatose for a least a week but after two days he opened his eyes and smiled.
"You.. Son of a bitch..." He heard a voice behind him that took him by surprise.
"Stark?" He turned around to see his patient staring up at the ceiling. His vision clouded from where his eyelids were stuck together.
Strange rushed over checking over him hoping his senses weren't playing tricks on him.
Tony's eyes were heavy yet determined. He exhaled steady remembering theses facility ceilings. Strange must have treated him in Wakanda. He tried not to focus on any particular spot. He blinked his eyes, clearing the haze and unlocking detached memories. Hopefully he’d regain his senses soon.
"You did it..." He said more like a whisper.
"It was all you my friend." Steven set his hand on the rail. He didn’t want to admit it but he was worried he wouldn’t pull through, but his will to live is so strong. The surgery to save his life was a gamble in itself but he was glad he tried. This man surpassed his highest expectations. It wasn’t his time.
It wasn’t long before Tony began to remember everything; Thanos, the fight, the snap. He wasn’t entirely sure if it was real, it now felt like dream. His breaths became more ragged when he remembered the devastation in which he left his beloved.
"Where's Pepper..?" She was entering the room after stepping out briefly for something to drink.
Her heart throbbed when she stepped in the room to see him awake. She was barely able to say anything before Tony decided to pick his head up and look for her.
"I'm right here," She was at his side as was Strange. It didn’t take long for him to realize his body was in worse shape than he thought and it let him know. The pain washed over him like a wave from his right side hitting him hard. His head ached, probably trying to process this strange feeling.
It was sudden and harsh but also disconnected. He wasn’t sure how to process it. Pepper cupped his cheek and began talking to him; distract him while Steven gathered some medication for him.
"Hey hey, it's ok. Just settle down,” She cooed, “you're gonna be fine but you've got to relax.” Her voice was calm and soothing just what he needed to hear. He felt grounded again, like she’s the calm in the calamity. His breathing evened as Strange injected something into the iv. It didn’t take long for it to take effect and he could feel the pain dull.
"It's too soon for you to move; the wound is still very fresh." Strange stated and Tony should’ve knew better. He felt it the instant he woke up how weak he was. Lightheadedness hit him as he drifted back into his pillow, spots invaded his vision. Pepper hovered over her husband concern plastered on her face. He just stared straight threw her.
“He’d lost a lot of blood, quicker than were able to replace. He shouldn’t be conscious..” He could feel himself fading and their words became distorted. His breathing was heavy but steady as he was lulled away by sleep.
…
It was hours later before he awoke the second time. This time his mind felt clearer and the pain was easier to manage. He silently thanked the drugs for that and Strange for administering them. He wondered how long he’d been out as he gingerly opened his eyes enough to let the light in. It wasn’t as bad as before except for the headache that still remained.
He could sense someone beside him but before he could speak he was greeted with a temperature check, which was just the back of a rather cold hand touching his temple. He confirmed his suspicions when he glanced over to see Strange beside him.
“How long was I out?” He mumbled his voice was hoarse and weak from under use.
“Just a couple of hours since you woke up. Before that 2 days.” He said after flipping through his clipboard.
Tony shifted his eyes to the window careful not to jolt his body although he was feeling much better than earlier. It was hard to believe he’d been out that long. “I’m surprised to see you awake. You really should be in a medically induced comma you know.”
“You’re probably right.” He said quiet. Steven furrowed his brow and set his clipboard down. He was finding it hard to read this man who he was so sure he’d figured out 5 years ago before disintegrating. It was still surreal to him to believe everything that’s transpired.
“How do you feel?” That was a loaded question even though it wasn’t intended to be. He wasn’t sure how to answer it. His muscles ached and even now he was still struggling to stay awake but honestly he was happy to be alive.
“Pretty good,” Steven was curious. Tony hadn’t seemed like the overly optimistic type but he was glad he was taking well so far.
“Are you experiencing any level of pain?” He was still a bit out of it but for the most part he felt relaxed. He tried not to focus on it but there was this nagging throbbing feeling in his side that he was just able to ignore. He had a feeling he’d become acquainted with his wounds soon enough.
“It’s manageable.” Tony could tell he was walking on eggshells. He’d come to peace with anything. His body would be the last thing holding him back. He’d been through so much over the years.
Being stranded in the desert after Obadiah betrayed him that’s gravy. The arc reactor imbedded in his chest for year was no shear feat. He’d been beaten, stabbed and thrown off buildings. Just to breathe easy was a blessing. He’d fought Thanos twice and survived. He was determined to handle whatever life threw at him. This was no different, just another challenge.
"Just tell me.” Tony was blunt and he wasn’t historically the most patient man. Strange sighed; even after years of breaking bad news to his patients, this seemed like a nearly impossible task. It’d be a long time since he’d touched the knife, he just hope he did enough. He pushed the pessimistic thought from his mind and brought himself back to the moment.
Steven sighed, he had a feeling it was coming and he decided it was best not to sugar coat anything.
"Major portions of the right side above the pelvis to the base of the collar bone and right arm were compromised. I was able to reverse most of the damage and direct it to the arm. There was no saving it. But it gave us the opportunity we needed to reduce and in a way, with the stone rewind the more critical damage back to an operable position.”
He spoke timid, afraid how he would react but it wasn’t how he expected. Tony was rather calm, he looked more tired than anything else but otherwise he didn’t react much just taking the information in. There’s still this looming worry about risk verses reward in regards to using magic alongside modern medicine and science.
Strange continued explaining the extent of the damage and the experimental process he used to heal him. “It’s quite amazing and goes against everything I was trained for. My responsibility was to protect the stone but.. it can’t be helped. But you my friend really are something else entirely. Even after knowing your fate was predestined you surpassed my highest expectations. I feel like I owed it to you to at least give everything in my power for a chance.”
“Your stubbornness continues to amaze me.” Tony seemed surprised but was quiet for a moment. He knew it was a lot for him to take in but he was very good a hiding his emotions. For once the calm on his face after hearing the news was genuine. Even though he’d disbelieved magic for so long; after everything that’s happened he couldn’t have been more grateful for it.
"An arm is a small price to pay for a little more time with my family." Suddenly Tony exhaled, closing his eyes and smiled.
"Thank you." He looked up to the doctor who saved his life his eyes full of fatigue but also a sense of hope. He seemed disconnected but actually his mind was going a mile a minute. Then he realized there’s something missing, more like someone.
“Where’s Pep?”
“I ported her home. She said there were a few things she wanted to attend to since you’d regained consciousness.”
He forged a small smile, still he felt bad for passing out on her earlier. He wasn’t able to say much when he saw her. Strange sensed the tension forming and took it upon himself to relieve it.
“I was supposed to let her know when you wake so.” He made some kind of weird gesture which he didn’t seem to pay any mind until a bright orange circle fabricated in the air in front of him. There standing on the other side was his beloved.
He was amazed to see her there standing in their room, see seemed to be packing some bag and he had a feeling they’d be staying for a while. He pushed that thought aside and spoke out to her.
“Hey Pep,” he hadn’t even said her name that loud but the sudden invasion of privacy startled her. She wasn’t too thrilled to hear from him, at least at first considering it scared the shit out of her and she just about threw a handful of folded clothes into the air.
“Ah shit!” She exclaimed. It took her a moment to discover where it was coming from. She definitely wasn’t expecting to hear his voice speak out of thin air.
But when she did she didn’t know why she was so surprised when Steven Strange was behind it. She was still getting used to magic and everything happened so fast but it was easier to blame the wizard then her wounded husband her obviously got a kick out of it. She’d let it slide for now.
“You scared the hell out of me.” She seemed to subconsciously check to see if her heart was still beating in her chest.
He hesitated answering her just for the sheer fact he’d missed playing pranks on her and was just glad to see her. Bless this woman for she put up with so much. “he said it so nonchalant in his
“I’m good at that aren’t I?
“I wish you weren’t sometimes. You really had me worried,” She still didn’t want to admit how truly petrified she was. There wasn’t anything she could do to help him. Just be there, and she had ever since he was released to recovery. Those hours in between were the most emotionally destabilizing, that terror for the unknown was almost too much for her. Still she couldn’t begin to fathom how he felt. She wasn’t very good at hiding her feelings sometimes especially when caught off guard.
“I’m sorry babe,” Now Tony felt like an ass, which was the last thing she wanted. He’d been through enough. She was quick to forgive him for something so silly bringing her right back to reality.
“It’s ok Hon, I’m sorry I was spooked but I’m so happy to see you.”
“I’m alright, a bit tired. I haven’t tried moving yet but yeah I feel pretty good considering.” He was honestly just happy to be awake, the thought of being out of it for 2 days. Strange explained the gist of everything really well but he can only imagine how complicated it was the process. He was extremely lucky.
“Uh, whatcha doing anyway?” He cocked an eyebrow, dropping subtle cutes. Pepper was quick to pick up on it but there no use dancing around it.
“I’m packing something’s. I imagine we’ll be spending a few weeks in Wanaka while you’re recovering.” She stated. The thought of being away from home for so long confided to a room loomed over him. If it was for his health’s sake he understood. But he couldn’t help how he felt about it. Pepper had a feeling and honestly didn’t want him to find out until she got back but it didn’t change anything.
“Pep,” he said soft but enough to get her attention but before he could continue Steven interrupted them.
“Are you ready to come back? I’m not exactly face time or a taxi you know.” He couldn’t help his sarcasm sometime and he’d been awake for a very long time and getting increasingly more irritable by the hour.
“Give me 20 minutes; I have a surprise for you.” Pepper was quick to answer back. But ultimately ignored the attitude, those lucky enough to get a pass have earned it otherwise she’d give it back. But after everything she was so grateful to him for everything he’s done. They’ve talked a lot while Tony was out of it and she learned that he wasn’t entirely different from her husband. The both of them were academically gifted excelling in their fields. They’ve gone through a tremendous amount of trauma. So if anyone could relate to Tony it’d be him.
“Is that so? It wouldn’t happen to be some kind of payback for scaring you?” Tony inquired a bit concerned. Pepper had a tendency to get him back.
“I’ll just leave that up to your imagination.” She smiled and Strange ended the conversation. Tony turned to bicker when instantly shot down by the doctor.
“Relax it seemed like a nice place to leave you.” Strange snickered, getting a bit of satisfaction out of tormenting the man if a little bit. Physiological warfare, Tony wouldn’t take it lying down at least not by choice. “You’re a jerk you know that.” He grumbled.
“Coming from one most definitely,” he shot back and Tony was speechless for a moment. So he remained quiet after all he wasn’t wrong. But if only briefly then there was a stifled knock at the door. Strange hesitated but motioned to answer the door. Any staff would have entered, knowing that he wasn’t entirely surprised when he saw Captain America stand in the doorway.
“Hey,” Tony knew it the moment he spoke up who it was and even it hurt him to do so he lifted his head toward the door. Steve was like a foot away from the entrance as if he’d be reflected unless invited in.
“May I?” he inquired to the doctor who in turn stepped to the side. There haven’t been any visitors other than Pepper and everything was hushed to say.
“Hey Steve,” Tony spoke up and Strange took the opportunity to step out for a moment while the two of them talked.
Steve seemed tired, beaten up and bruised just like the rest of them. But also very happy to see his friend and it showed. The moment they met eye to eye it was like a weight was lifted. Ever since the beginning they withheld information from them. Other than he’d been stabilized two days ago and that was it. The public’s been given even less to go on. T’Challa respected Peppers wish to privacy during times of uncertainty.
He just had a hunch. Tony was happy to see him too, he didn’t know it but they were incredibly lucky to come out as well as they had. No one expected Thanos to show again and yet Tony had a feeling. He silently made the plan B without any of them knowing. He truly was a genus in and he admired him. Steve didn’t want him to die but Steve felt so useless when it came down to the wire.
It happened so fast and he’d thought about it a lot the past couple days. There was nothing he could have done but he really wanted to see him before he made up his mind.
Steve couldn’t speak. So Tony broke the ice.
“Go ahead tell me I look pretty.” He smiled, even after everything he’s been through his humor remained intact. He was thankful for that. He would need it.
It was hard for him to admit he was happy to see him awake and in good spirits. He’d
“You look like a million,” Steve admitted and he really did look amazing. Even missing an arm and beat to hell and bandaged up it was a far cry from the last time he’d seen him. He pushed it out of his mind. That moment believed they won without realizing who managed to make it happen. His body was built to withstand anything like that. It was hard to believe the same person came back from something like that.
“Hell I’m worth more than that.” Tony answered quick catching him by surprise, and he actually laughed.
“You’re not wrong.” Steve exhaled allowing the tension to melt away.
“What’s been happening while I was out? I’m sure people are freaking out.” Tony’s mind was prepared to go a mile a minute. Steve was quick to answer his questions.
“Slow up I know just the one to catch you up.” It didn’t take him long to locate the remote for the lonely television on the other end. He’d come a long way with technology and within minutes the world news was on. What happened and the aftermath it was being broadcast on repeat ever since.
So Tony laid back and they watched the TV, who else better to fill him in other than the news. At the moment they were talking about everyone coming back from the dead same age as they were 5 years ago. Even though life continued without them the world was happy to have the vanished returned.
They showed an aerial view of the destruction left at the base and the cleanup effort underway. It was clear they haven’t told the media much. Everything surrounding the incident was real hush but they had their ways of obtaining information. Still there was a clip someone sent in. Some kids drone managed to record the end. It was so surreal to watch after he was already convincing himself to believe it was all just a dream.
Then they started talking about him. They showed some more footage and it was him, that moment he took the stones and caught Thanos off guard. He though the image of it was fuzzy and dust covered the lenses the world saw what he did. A wave shot through the battle field and which knocked the camera out of the sky and cut the stream but it was out there.
They praised him; worried for him, and prayed for his recovery but... honestly it was obvious they had no idea what happened to him. Then he had an idea but maybe it was time to disappoint them. As much as it hurt to say it he couldn’t do this anymore, he was lucky the only thing he lost was an arm. Had it been any different he would have lost his life. If he continues he was certain there’ll be nothing left to give. Then he thought better to remove himself from the equation.
“I don’t think they need to know I survived.” Tony thought about it. Even if it was hard to admit there was a sense of peace in being able to have a clean slate.
“That’s a lot to handle.” Steve was honest but he’d personally been in the same boat not under the same circumstances but nonetheless he understood how he felt.
“That’s a lot coming from a man who was believed to be deceased for 70 years.” Tony was right but that was never his choice and he knew that honestly he didn’t mean it just kind of slipped out.
“I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.” Tony apologized. Steve knew he was under a lot of stress especially after watching the news. It was a lot to process and it was a heavy decision to make.
“I understand where you’re coming from. I can’t tell you what to do but take it from me and make up for lost time. I feel like everyone deserves a chance to retire. It’s hard for people like us. Sometime you have to do what you feel is right.” Somehow the more he thought about it the more relaxed he became with the idea of it.
“Have you told anyone yet?” Tony shook his head. He didn’t want to say he just thought of it but all things considered it wasn’t a bad idea.
Steve told him about the possibility of returning back to the past. He felt like he could have the life he left behind. He knew everyone would understand and either way they’d have to accept it. He couldn’t do this anymore either. But people like them don’t just retire. This life, it isn’t one you leave unless you’re forced out of it. Sometime you need to do it yourself.
He told Tony how he felt and considering they had to return the stones back to their places anyway he could make the last stop the one where they picked up the stone in the base. The timing would be right after he went missing.
Tony wasn’t a fan of changing the past at first but considering everything they’d done until now, him surviving because of the time stone he was lightening up on the idea. And it wasn’t exactly a bad one. He knew he’d be careful not to give himself in the past so he silently agreed with his resolve as he did with his.
“Go live your life Cap,” Tony smiled. It was a strange feeling knowing the world will have to move on without them.
“Enjoy your death Ironman,” Steve smiled back thinking the same.