The SQUIP Song
The curtains opened, and at first most avengers barely noticed anything different. All that seemed to have changed was the classroom set up from before had moved over slightly.
A boy with a fake beard wearing a suit walked on stage. Seymour, the roster listed him as.
“Oh thank god the popular kids have arrived!” He exclaimed, as a group of students ran onto the stage and filled into the remaining seats surrounding Cindy and Charles.
“Hello everyone!” He exclaimed to the students.
“My name is Mr. Reyes, you may recognize me from drama class, or my full-time job at the hobby lobby.” He stated, and some of the audience laughed.
“I’ve been dreaming of the day I get to stage William Shakespeare’s classic, ‘A Midsummers Night’s Dream’.”
“Yes!” Cindy said excitedly.
“And today that dream dies.” Seymour said with a smile.
“What.” Cindy said, confusion and shock evident on her face. Natasha and Sam laughed.
“The school has informed me that unless I can increase our popularity, our funds will be diverted to the Frisbee-Golf team.” Seymour said with disgust. Some of the crowd laughed.
“Which is why our production will not be set in the pastoral forest past, but in a post-apocalyptic future.” They continued.
“Instead of frolicking with fairies, they’re will be fleeing from zombies.” Seymour said with a chuckle. Cindy’s face had a look of horror.
“B-but wait! Don’t you care about Shakespeare?” She pleaded.
“The man is dead let it go.” He said hugging Cindy tightly, while everyone else chattered in the background. The audience roared with laughter. Clint wiped a few stray tears of laughter from his eyes.
“I will allow a five minute break while I eat a hot pocket.” They said before running off backstage with Cindy chasing after him. Before she could though, Jake, err Abe stopped her.
“Hey you were in that play last year!” He said.
“You mean Romeo and Juliet?” Cindy corrected.
“Yeah! You were the girl who died.”
“You mean Juliet.”
“Yeah! Man that was depressing.”
“Thanks.” Cindy said hurriedly, shoving her journal into her backpack.
“You were...good. I’m Jake.” Abe said.
“I-Im.” Christine stuttered.
“Can I say something stupid? When you died in the play last year, that was the saddest I had felt in a long time. It was like everything in my life, all the pressure of feeling being to be the best, suddenly felt so small.” He admitted.
“And then when you got up again to do your uh, victory dance.”
“It’s called a bow.” Christine said with a smile. The crowd laughed again.
“I remember thinking…‘Wow, I’m glad that girl’s not dead, before I got the chance to know her.’” Abe told Cindy.
Tony snickered.
“You see that’s stupid right?” Abe said, shoving his hands in his pockets.
“T-That’s not stupid at all.” Cindy reassured him.
“So, uh, a bunch of sums are going out to practice today. You should join us.”
“Parting is such…” Abe began, before forgetting the phrase.
“Sorrow.” Cindy finished.
“Whatever.” Abe said, before leaving the stage and giving a thumbs up to Christine, who waved back.
Charles got up from where he had been sitting and listening and walked up to Cindy.
“Hey so I heard this thing where humans are evolving, and-”
“I’m sorry Jeremy, did you say something?” Cindy asked.
“Uh, forget it.” Charles said, before walking away and facing the audience as the lights dimmed and the spotlight focused on him.
“Once again there’s been a take down. But I guess it could’ve gone worse. At least I didn’t have a breakdown, then to go to the nurse.” Charles sang.
“I don’t wanna be special, don’t even need to survive. I wanna know Christine is aware I’m alive.”
Charles began to walk over to the dark part of the stage where a bathroom was set up. As he began to fake trying to wash of “BOYF” from his backpack, Flash walked into the bathroom.
“I told you not to wash that off.” He said, going up to Charles.
“Oh! Where’s my homework?” Charles quickly said.
“Hey! I’m talking to you tall-ass.” He said before going to stand infront of one of the urinals.
“Why do you even call me that?” Charles questioned. “I’m not even that tall.”
“Well, you could be if you weren’t hunched over and scared all the time.” He began to shake his butt, when Jeremy exclaimed.
“Dude how can you even talk to people when you’re doing…that.” Charles pointed at Flash while looking at the audience.
As Flash opened his mouth to talk to Charles he grabbed his head and the lights darkened, and the spotlight began to flash dark blue. Flash seemed to stop breathing as he shook, asif an electric shock went through him, with spooky electronic beeping occurring in the background before everything stopped and went back to the way it had been previously.
“You know…I don’t think I need to use the restroom anymore.” Charles tried to walk away before Flash yelled at him.
“Wait! No don’t move.”
Piano music with a hint of the electronic beat from before started to play.
“You don’t remember me, freshman year do you?”
“You didn’t go here freshman year.” Charles said, confused and worried.
“B-shh yes I did! See! You just didn’t notice!”
“Nobody did.”
The music began to play louder, and more upbeat, as Flash began to sing.
“Freshman year!”
“I didn’t have a girlfriend or a clue, I was a loser just like you, good times would only...soar by.”
“I was gross, as every female would attest, my sexting was a futile quest, and my little penis was depressed...he was lonely, poor guy,” Flash sang, while Charles stood there looking uncomfortable.
“I was hopeless, hopeless, I was helpless, helpless.”
“Everytime I walked the hallway I would trip. I was stagnant and idle, I was so suicidal.”
“And then, then, then, then,”
“Then, then, then, then,”
“Then, then, then, then,”
“Then, I got a SQUIP!” Flash turned away from where he had been facing the audience to look at Charles as the eerie electronic tune took over the music.
“You got quick?” Charles asked, confused.
“Not, quick, squip.” Flash replied, rolling his eyes.
“I’ve just never heard of it.” Charles defended himself.
“Ya, that’s the point.” Flash sling on arm on Charles’s shoulders and continued talking. “This is some top-secret-can’t-even-look-it-up-on-the-internet shit!”
Steve frowned. “Is it drugs?” The others shrugged.
“It’s from Japan.” Quiet laughter came from the audience. “It’s a gray, oblong pill, quantum nanotechnology CPU.”
“The quantum computer in the poll will travel through your blood until, it implants in your brain, and tells you what to do.
“It’s drugs.” Tony answered Steve.
“So, it’s like...drugs?” Charles said.
“Called it.” Tony said while pointing at Charles, as the crowd laughed.
Flash just stared at Charles with an unimpressed look.
“It’s better then drugs, Jeremy.”
“IT’S FROM JAPAN!” Flash yelled, while most of the teens in the theatre laughed loudly.
“It’s a gray oblong pill, quantum nanotechnology CPU.” The lights went out and the spotlights began to rapidly flash white and blue onto Flash and Charles, whilst Flash’s singing now had an electronic voice singing along with him.
“The quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until it implants in your brain, and it tells you what to do.”
“It tells you what to do!” The ensemble began to sing along with Flash, circling Charles and Flash in the shadows, where they were harder to see.
“It’s pre-programmed, it’s amazing, speaks to you, directly.” Flash began to shake his hand in excitement.
“You behave as, it’s appraising, helps you act correctly.” Flash shook in the same way he had earlier and stopped shaking his hands.
“It helps you to be cool! It helps you rule!” He sang.
“Picture this!” The old upbeat music returned.
“Nobody cares if you are late, ‘cause even teachers think you’re great. Your weekend is just a full on slate of blowout benders, of teenage rockstar splendors.”
“Right now, you are helpless, helpless, you are, almost hopeless.”
“On the school’s social map you are just a blip, but if you take my advice and if you pay the listed price,”
“Well then you go from sad to interesting, to hip-your whole life will flip!”
“When you buy a SQUIP!” The ensamble returned.
“Hey, yeah a SQUIP!”
“Ahhhh, ahhhh~”
“Oh, a SQUIP!”
“Ahhhh, ahhhh~”
“Hey yeah!”
“Ahhhh, ahhhh~”
“No longer a drip, when you got in your grip-” He turned to Jeremy who’s face a had dawned a interested look.
“A SQUIP!”
“A SQUIP!”
“A SQUIP!” Flash held onto the note.
“Ahhahaha~” The ensemble sang.
“Ahhahaha~”
“Ahhahaha~”
Then the flash lights stopped, the curtains closed and the audience was left in the dark as the applauded.
“Why is they’re play about a child taking drugs.” Thor asked.
“Well Thor,” Loki began to say, before being cut off by Wanda.
“It’s better than drugs, Thor.” She said seriously.
“It’s from Japan!”