74th - part 8
katniss's pov
Once the adrenaline from the start of the Games wears off, I have to admit that it’s a little awkward sitting here with just Johanna. At least during training we had Blight as a buffer to fill in the gaps in our conversation where neither of us knew what to talk about. But now, all we can do is make comments about the arena.
And then, suddenly, she asks me about Prim. So I gush about my little sister more than I probably should have, but she doesn’t stop me. I don’t know anything about Johanna’s family, so instead I ask about District 7. She happily tells me about the natural beauty of her home, with trees that are genetically modified to grow hundreds of feet tall. I remember them from my Victory tour, but there’s something special about hearing Johanna describe them.
I’m not sure how it happens, but at some point we both decide to trust each other. After that, we open up and pretty much talk ourselves hoarse. She tells me how she had to start working when she was 13 to support her family, how she quickly became one of the best cutters despite being smaller than everyone else, how she had to learn to defend herself because kids would pick on her in school, how a thief once broke into her family’s house and she had to fight him off by herself. I tell her how I learned to hunt with my dad, how I became the sole provider after he died in the mines, how Gale and I kept our families alive for years on our own. I avoid talking about Peeta, but I get the sense that she’s keeping some things private too.
Neither of us mentions our Games, except for when Johanna asks, “Were you on tesserae?”
I nod.
“Me too,” she says simply. Then she starts talking about something else, and we manage to avoid anything else to do with the Reaping or the Games.
“So do you and Blight usually do shifts like this?” I ask eventually. Ever since Haymitch mentioned pulling all nighters, I’ve been wondering what mentors do . Does everyone really sit here waiting for something to happen? Did Haymitch really sit here, alone, watching me try not to die? I can’t believe he would give up sleep to sit and watch me, but I guess he did.
“Only if we think the tributes have a chance,” Johanna replies with a chuckle. “And a lot of them don’t even make it past the Cornucopia, so…”
I grimace. That must hurt, to have your time as a mentor last a few minutes. “So you think these ones have a chance?”
“Well, as an alliance, sure. If they were on their own, forget about it.”
“So you wouldn’t watch at all?”
“I didn’t say that, ” Johanna replies.
I couldn’t imagine not watching if I had tributes in the arena. In fact, I’m worried about what I’ll do when Haymitch and Blight come back to take our place, because I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep. Not when Santhe and Cole are out there, fighting for their lives, trying to make it home, and I know exactly how it feels.
“I’m hungry,” Johanna announces, then turns to me. “Are you hungry?”
“I guess.” At first, I feel guilty, but refusing to eat won’t do the tributes any good. “But we can’t leave.”
Johanna waves over an Avox. “Tell him what you want,” she instructs me.
Oh God. I want to say forget it, to tell the Avox it’s no big deal, but I don’t want Johanna to be annoyed with me, and I really am hungry, actually. I don’t think I’ll ever be comfortable with this, but I mutter, “Lamb stew, please.”
The Avox nods and looks at Johanna, who asks for spaghetti.
About half an hour later, he returns with our lunch. Johanna smiles at me and digs into her pasta, which I have to admit looks really good. But the second I taste my stew, I forget all about the pasta. This is delicious. I thought I would be sick of it by now, but damn is it good.
While we eat, we start to brainstorm ways that the tributes might work on taking down the Careers. If we can get sponsors, we could use them to send a message or a tool to the tributes and set the plan in motion.
“They can’t just take out the food supply,” Johanna grunts through a mouthful of spaghetti. “We need them to actually make sure they’re dead.”
“Not necessarily. It worked for me,” I counter.
“Yeah, but it would’ve been better for you if they’d all died in the explosion. You could’ve waited for them to return and gotten them all at once.”
“But I missed my first shot, so that wouldn’t have worked. Plus, Rue—” I hesitate, then quietly finish, “Rue was waiting for me.”
Johanna takes another bite of spaghetti. I can see her glancing at me out of the sides of her eyes, and finally she mutters, “Sorry. Didn’t mean to bring that up.”
“No, it’s ok.”
“I, um…,” Johanna’s face softens so that she hardly looks like the asshole I once thought she was, “I liked watching you two together.” A small smile lifts the corner of Johanna’s mouth. “That was a good plan.”
“If only it didn’t fall apart,” I say bitterly.
Johanna doesn’t argue against that, because I doubt she could come up with anything. But after a moment, she aimlessly pushes her spaghetti around with her fork and, without looking up at me, murmurs, “I thought it was sweet how you gave her a real goodbye.”
I smile slightly. She finally looks at me, notices my smile, and quickly goes back to staring at her lunch.
“So anyways,” she sighs, “maybe we should just wait and see what they come up with, and if it sucks, then we’ll get involved.”
When Haymitch and Blight return, Johanna and I stay for a bit to summarize the day. Nothing really happened, aside from the initial bloodbath. Our tributes made it to the mountains and started to explore, eventually finding a small cave to hide in for the night. Now they’re taking turns on watch.
I’m actually not as tired as I thought I would be, but I’m hungry. Johanna and I didn’t bother to order dinner in the viewing room, so I can feel my stomach grumbling as I walk into the elevator with her. Hopefully I can order something to my room.
“Hey, so, I know we just spent 12 hours together,” Johanna turns to me suddenly as the elevator rises, “but if you’re not sick of me, you should come over for dinner.”
“Really? I thought you’d be sick of me .
She chuckles. “Well, I am, but I also hate eating alone.”
I know what she means. Eating alone is too quiet, and it reminds me of being in the arena. At least when someone else is there, I don’t have to feel like I should be constantly watching my back or guarding my food.
So when the elevator opens on District 7’s floor and Johanna raises her eyebrows at me, I decide to follow her. We order food, she introduces me to their escort, and we sit and joke about what Haymitch and Blight must be doing right now.
“Haymitch started counting down the minutes as soon as we left,” Johanna laughs. “I know he did. 12 hours with Blight?”
“Blight’s not that bad.”
“To Haymitch? Oh yes, he is. They’re like, total opposites.”
“Well, it’s not like they have to talk,” I reason, then burst out laughing at the mental image of the men sitting in a darkened room, silently watching the tributes sleep. “Oh god, what if they don’t talk at all?”
Johanna cackles. “Please, they just sit there for 12 hours!”
Somehow, neither of us thinks to look at the clock until I finally notice that it’s midnight and jump to my feet. Johanna doesn’t seem too bothered by how late it’s gotten, and honestly, I don’t know if it’s even worth trying to sleep. But I should anyway, considering how we’ll have to be up again at 8am for another 12 hour shift, so I say goodbye to her and walk back to my room.
I suppose it’s nice having an ally.