Chapter 8
Wade had a nice car. An older jeep model, painted tan and remarkably tidy both inside and out. It was high up, lifted, so Peter had to do a mortifying jump and lunge move to even get in the beast. The humiliation was worth Wade’s laugh and muttered ‘lil adorable shit’ as he climbed in with ease. Peter rolled his eyes and how graceful Wade was. Freaking elegant, long-legged giant who didn’t have to boost himself to get in his car.
The silence between them after that lighthearted moment was near suffocating, however. Peter sat in the passenger seat. His hands folded neatly in his lap. Peter noticed vaguely that he was shivering. The sweat from his run soaking his clothes and causing goosebumps to run across his skin. When his teeth started chattering, Wade turned to him, wide eyes open and questioning.
He quickly turned on his heater. Peter breathed out a content sigh when warm air blew from the vents.
“Thank you,” he laughed, awkward. “It was- it was getting kind of cold.”
“What were you doing running out this early without a jacket is all I wanna know,” Wade muttered, hands clenching his steering wheel. “I mean, honestly, Peter. It’s just early spring. It’s cold in the mornings. I saw your breath when I was running over to you! Did you forget your jacket or something?” He looked at Peter, jaw tensed attractively.
“I dunno,” Peter shrugged, scratching at his arm. “Woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep, is all,” he lied.
“And that caused you to run out of your house,” Wade waved half-hazard to Peter’s thin sweats and cotton tee, “in that when it’s 50 degrees outside? Because you couldn’t go back to sleep?”
Feeling attacked and trapped, Peter lashed out. “I couldn’t sleep anymore, Wade! I didn’t know I had to text and let you know my every move! You want me to text you when I’m using the bathroom, too?!” He screeched, then promptly slapped a hand over his mouth; staring wide eyed at an obviously shocked Wade. “Wade… I’m so sorry,” Peter breathed, tears springing to his eyes. “I shouldn’t-“ a sob, “ I shouldn’t yell at you like that.” He cried into his hands, ugly, body wracking sobs escaping.
“Woah, Woah!” Wade pulled the car to a stop with a screeching sound from the brakes. Pulling Peter into his arms, he began rocking him. “Shh, Petey, I’m so sorry! I shouldn’t have gone off on you like that, baby boy.” He ran a gentle hand through Peter’s hair and down his back, Peter sniffling into his chest as he let himself be soothed.
“I just saw you outside in what little clothes you had on and I got so worried. Then you go on to tell me that you’d been running for two hours in the cold,” Letting out a breath, Wade squeezed Peter. “I just panicked and took it out on you, and I shouldn’t have. I was worried and it came out as being an overbearing and controlling dickhead.” He barked a short laugh, hand still rubbing soothing patterns onto Peter’s back.
Wade held Peter for what seemed like ages. Until his sobs finally stopped and he was able to pull himself back from Wade’s welcoming embrace. His shirt was soaked with Peter’s tears and snot. Peter grimaced. Wade was staring at him fully now. His hazel eyes sparked with confusion and worry.
“I’m sorry. I snotted all over your shirt,” he said, embarrassed.
Wade, beautiful, wonderful, kind, Wade just shrugged it off with a little laugh. “It was laundry day, anyways, Peter. No biggy.” Looking over at Peter, he asked, “you okay, now?”
Deciding to be honest with the boy who had just held him while he had a freak out, he answered, “No, not- not really.” When Wade went to open is mouth, Peter rushed out, not thinking about the word vomit he was spewing. “I woke up early, you know? So, I tried going back to sleep but I couldn’t, and I started feeling bad. So, I was like ‘hey! I’ll go for a nice little run!’ Then I started thinking about what my therapist said about exercise and how it’s supposed to help with”- he pointed at his temple, “And I ran harder and faster. Then next thing I know, I’m stopping in an unfamiliar neighborhood with you running over to me.” Taking a much-needed breath, “I didn’t even know I was no longer in my neighborhood. That’s how lost in thought I was.”
When he looked up at Wade, the poor boy was blinking rapidly, trying his hardest to absorb all the information he had just been told. Peter just bit down on his lip anxiously. He just whipped a whole lot of information on a very unsuspecting person. He didn’t even know why he told that stuff to Wade! It had just all rushed out. No hesitation.
“Wowza,” Wade said after a bit of silence. He gave an awkward chuckle. “That- that was a lot of information in such a short period of time. Jesus.”
Groaning, Peter pushed open the car door. “I’ll walk from here. I think some things look familiar..” he was pulled back in by gentle coaxing hands. Covering his face, he slouched. “I am so sorry, Wade.”
“Hush, baby boy. It’s fine,” Wade cooed as he settled back into his own seat. “Everyone needs someone to talk to,” after a minute, he added, remarkably shy, “I- um- I’m here, you know that, right, Peter? You can talk to me.” He sent him a gentle smile before turning the car back on and beginning to drive.
“Are you sure?” Peter asked, tentative. “Because there is a lot that I should probably talk about.”
“All ears, baby boy,” Wade nodded. “Talk away.”
So, Peter did.
He talked about everything. He talked to Wade about Uncle Ben and what had happened that night. He talked about the struggles Aunt May faced after it and his struggles with his depression and self-blaming. He told Wade about how he still blamed himself most days.
The whole time, Wade didn’t talk. He just listened and smiled encouragingly at Peter. The older boy never once tried to interrupt with anything. He just listened and the relief of someone just listening nearly brought a fresh set of tears to Peter’s eyes. He was so used to people saying things like oh, it’ll get easier’ or ‘oh my god, you poor dear’ that he nearly forgot what it was like to be heard and not just hushed with insincerities that were supposed to mean well but only ended up hurting him more.
“Thank you,” Peter whispered.
“For what?” Wade questioned.
“For listening. For hearing me.”
Wade squeezed Peter’s hand and Peter sighed into the touch. “Anytime, Peter. Anytime.”
They stayed like that the whole way back to Peter’s house and when Peter was about to step out, he pulled Wade into a crushing hug. Probably letting a little too much of his feelings bleed into the embrace. Wade let out a sigh and held him just as tight.
“See you at school tomorrow?” Peter asked, pulling back and smiling.
Wade ’s smile was so soft. “Wouldn’t miss it.”