Learning the Truth
Saturday, June 3rd, 2000
Harry looked down at the tiny baby in his arms. Both a newborn and forty years old. Harry wasn't quite sure how to wrap his head around that, so just elected to remember this was a whole new person, not Severus anymore.
Harry tore his eyes away from the sleeping child, though he didn't want to, to look up at Madame Pomfrey. The pair were in the woman's office in Hogwarts reconstructed Hospital Wing, Poppy standing, Harry sitting in her chair.
“How did this happen?” The nearly twenty year old questioned, nodding to indicate he meant Severus's new, younger, state.
“A potion, that's all I can tell you. I don't know the ingredients, who created it, when it was created, anything. It certainly wasn't released, though, and likely not tested. I don't even know if this was the desired affect....Severus didn't tell anyone, and I can't imagine anyone else but him being involved, so there's really no way to say.” Poppy informed, but she wasn't looking at Harry, instead the bundle in his arms.
“Can you tell me everything? From when the war ended on?”
“You know most of what happened until June of '99, last year. I know you helped with the construction of the school over summer, and of course re-did your seventh year. Severus was too injured during most of that to teach, but I don't think he would have anyway, don't think anyone else would have wanted him to either.”
Harry nodded.
“Severus was completely healed by the beginning of this school year, if not before, but he didn't leave. I guess he didn't really have anywhere to go. We left him alone. He seemed to want it, the second I released him from the wing he was always alone in his rooms. I guess he was working on that potion.”
“You found him yesterday, right?”
“At 8:00 P.M. He didn't go to meals all day, which wasn't really that odd, but I worry about him, so I went and checked. All that I found was the newborn you're holding. After many medical exams, some I had to teach myself in the moment, I got all the answers, well all the ones currently available.”
“Which are?”
“He was born, so to say, at 7:59 A.M., yesterday, so he was alone for twelve hours before I found him. He's a whole new person, no memories or anything, though I think it can be assumed basic things are still the same, like gender and sexuality. He's completely healthy, no current allergies, weighs six pounds, and is seventeen inches long.”
“Is six pounds average, or?”
“Most newborns are 5-8 pounds, so that is nothing to be concerned about. I did check his original birth certificate, and everything seems to match up.”
Harry felt like rubbing his face, but held back on the instinct as he wasn't exactly in the mood to hurt, or possibly kill, a newborn by dropping it. “So, what's the plan?”
“Well, he obviously needs a guardian, and I would prefer not to send him to an orphanage or with strangers. I considered a lot of options, but, ultimately, I think you're best.”
“Why me? Out of everyone?”
“I know you won't hurt him, or hold a grudge like many would. You've been in his place, orphaned kid with dead parents and few, if any, living relatives. Also, he had a close relationship with your mother, which feels significant, though I'm not sure I can explain why.”
“What about Hermione? She's more responsible and stuff than me. She would make a great parent.”
“I'm sure she would, but I don't believe Ms. Granger really wants a kid at this stage in her life. I'm sure you read the article The Prophet released about her rather aggressive, to quote them, dislike of the idea of marrying a man and have a baby with him.” Poppy reasoned, unable to stop the grinning from appearing at the memory of that article. Hermione had torn into that 'poor' interviewer in a way no one would ever forget. Poppy had never been more proud of anyone.
“That's true....I think Hermione would make a good aunt for any of my kids though, we've talked and she really likes the idea of being my kid's godmother. And I have always wanted a kid, but don't think I'll really have any other opportunity than this.”
“So, you'll raise him?”
“Maybe.” Harry replied in a warning tone. “But, we need to talk about some stuff first.”
“What is it?”
Harry took a deep breath. What was he ever supposed to say? There were a million thoughts and questions zooming through his mind and he couldn't pick the most important.
“Are you okay?” Madame Pomfrey eventually cut through his thoughts, accidentally giving Harry the perfect idea on how to start the conversation.
“Yeah....Speaking of which, should I see a therapist? I mean, I've been through a lot and I don't want that to negatively impact me or the baby. But is it too late now? Is it okay to be in therapy while raising a baby?”
“Of course it's okay. I actually think it's an amazing idea. It'll help you in general, but can also help you in taking care of Sev, and/or any future kids you may have or be the uncle of.”
“Where would the baby be when I was at therapy, though?”
“One of your friends houses, or I know you take care of Teddy sometimes, him being your godson. I'm sure Andromeda Tonks would be okay with occasionally taking Sev.”
Harry nodded. “Oh, definitely. Andi can't wait for more grandchildren.”
“Well, there you go.”
“Okay, but there's more. I don't have anything for a baby. Where do I get it?”
“Oh, there's a wonderful store in Diagon Alley, The Children's World, that sells pretty much anything you need for kids age 0-6. Clothes, toys, books, bedsheets, bottles, formula. As for food when he's a little older, you can get that any normal food store.”
“Where would we live? I am not raising a child in No. 12, and my parents house is wrecked. Hogwarts won't work for various reasons, and although I know my father's family had a mansion, which he grew up in, there is no way that is the environment I will raise a child in. My mom's family's house was sold after she died, and the Dursely's have moved back to their house, but I certainly wouldn't choose to live there anyway.”
“The Potter's had no other houses but the mansion?” Poppy questioned in shock. Most rich families at least had a summer house.
“A cottage in France, but it seems more like a vacation house, and I don't want to leave the country, a cabin in a wood I've never heard of which doesn't sound the most...child-friendly, and, my best option, a house in the English countryside.”
“Why don't you live in the house? The last one you said?”
“Well, I've visited it before, I considered moving, but ended up staying in No. Twelve. It's a nice home, two story, four bedroom-eight bathroom, I have no reason not to. But....”
“But?”
“I already didn't move in once, I just don't know. Maybe there's a reason I didn't. But, also, if I adopt the baby, he needs a house, so I guess it'll have to do.”
“Alright, anything else?”
“I don't know how to change a diaper or anything. Which are sort of vital skills for having a baby, I'm assuming.”
Poppy laughed a little. “I'll teach you, though a lot will come with experience.”
“Okay, I mean, I guess, I mean-” Harry found himself looking back down at the new-old baby. “I'll take him, I'll adopt him....But, this conversation isn't over.”
“Oh, Mr. Potter, that's just marvelous! What else do you want to discuss right now?”
“What do we tell people? The baby obviously can't be my bio, but we need an explanation for how he's magical and not a muggleborn....I don't really want to take his actual blood status away.”
“I thought about that already! Severus actually has a muggle father and pureblood mother, from an ancient family. Instead we can give him a muggle father and first generation pureblood mother, so she would be the only pureblood in her family.”
“And how he came into my care?”
“Sev's father in real life died of 'natural causes' by official terms, but it was likely actually a killing cure. Instead, we can just say he had a heartattack. His mother fell down a set of stairs, but we can just say childbirth got her.”
“And how do I factor into this? What's the actual story?”
“A widowed twenty-three year old whose husband recently died of a heartattack came into the Hospital Wing in labor. She refused to give her or her husbands name or information, but she did speak a little about his death. The baby was soon born at 7:59 A.M., and the mother tragically died during the birth from the strain of it. Everything else can remain true.”
Harry breathed out, still gazing at the baby. “And Severus? What's his story.”
“He was found dead not too long after the baby was born in a potion accident, both bodies were cremated and spread in a far away field as Severus's always wanted. We had no way of knowing what the woman wanted, so did the same.”
“You're good at this.”
Poppy nodded. “I'm sixty-five years old, by magical standards that's not even middle aged, but no matter what scale you use, that's sixty-five years I've lived. Eventually, in this world, you get good at fabricating stories.
Harry nodded back, he, unfortunately, knew exactly what she meant. “So what do I call him? 'Severus' is a little on the nose, and I don't know if I want my kid to have that name anyway. I always thought I would name my first kid 'James' or 'Lily', but I don't really think that's the best idea all things considered.”
“That makes sense. You can call him whatever you want, but I can help some if you want. Ultimately though, it's up to you.”
“But, like, how do I even know he is a 'he'? Like, trans people exist, I've read books about it. I don't want to make my kid feel like they have to be a boy or something.”
“But, Severus was a man.” Poppy reminded.
“Maybe, maybe not. He was born in like 1960, not exactly the most progressive time period. And I doubt he had much time for self-discovery between being a double spy and teaching.”
“I guess that's true. So, are you not going to assign a gender?”
“I guess I'm not....Yeah, no, I'm not. What gives me the right to decide someone elses gender, even if I let them 'change' it later?”
“You should probably do a gender-neutral name then.”
“That's what I was thinking, but....What kind of name? I know my mom's family likes flower names, but are there any that aren't extremely feminine? I know about Cosmos, but I'm not sure it fits, especially since everyone will think about space.”
“Give me a moment.” Was Poppy's only reply before grabbing a piece of parchment and quill. Eventually she finished writing and handed the paper to Harry, looking satisfied.
Harry looked down at the paper. It seemed to be a list of gender-neutral plant names....Helpful.
1) Ash(er)
2) Sage
3) Indigo
4) Alder
5) Olive
6) Navy
7) Aster
8) Ren
9) Rowan
10) Florian
11) Lotus
12) Clement(ine)
Harry looked over the list a few times before striking off the first group. Asher/Clementine both involved a choice between two names, Alder sounded wrong for some reason, Olive was a bit on the more feminine side, Navy reminded his of the military, Aster was too similar to Alder, Ren was Japanese and that just felt odd, Florian reminded him too much of the ice cream shop, and Lotus didn't feel like a name.
Harry read his new list a few times, trying to figure out what fit 'Severus'. He now had three names: Sage, Indigo, and Rowan.
“I think I want to pick their middle name before deciding on a first.” Harry informed. “I have no idea where to go there. I don't want to name them after me and there is no one else. For obvious reasons, I don't want to go with my pre-two hours ago plan of giving my kid a space middle name.”
“You could do something based on your name, but which isn't it. Like another 'H' name.”
“Hmm.” Harry went through all the 'H' names he knew. Most prescribed to one gender or the other, except for one name he had been fixated on for some time at nine or so.
“I'm thinking: Sage Harlow Potter. Any opinions?”
“That's a wonderful name! It's cute, gender-neutral, and fits into all of your requirements, so I can't see any reason why you shouldn't name him, sorry, them that.”
Harry nodded in agreement before looking down at his new baby. “Yes, I think that's just perfect.”
“What do you want to do now?”
“I think we should do the paperwork, birth certificate, all that. Once that's done I should probably do the shopping, then you can teach me what I need to know....Then me and Sage can go home.”
Poppy smiled. “Sounds perfect.”