Legendary

My funk didn't pass, though, and I knew Tony was kind of worried about it. I just thought that I wasn't used to failing at things, different from loss, and there was no doubt that my career as a valkyrie had gone down in flames most spectacularly. The pain in my chest seemed to be easing, which was a relief. I kept up with my activities for distraction until I started enjoying things again.

I was in Asgard, working with Magni, when I began to feel weak. That was new; in the afterlife, you could exhaust yourself, but states like disease and general weakness just didn't exist; health was guaranteed. I finished out the lesson by having Magni take on one of his guards. He was showing continual improvement. I gathered myself and went back to Helheim, where I hunted up Hela for advice. She was concerned about the weakness as well and asked a lot of questions. The only thingy I could think of that was out of the ordinary was that chest pain. Hela frowned, asked detailed questions. She stood, telling me to stay put, and walked away, fading as she did so. I leaned back in the chair and closed my eyes while I waited. I woke from the light doze I'd fallen into when I heard Hela's voice, and frowned to hear Odin replying. Of all the people I didn't want to see...

The pain intensified with his presence, instantly propelling him to the top of my shit list. He looked me over, touched my chest with his fingertips, and his eyes unfocused. Hela bit her lip as she watched. A few breaths later, his hand fell away and he sighed. "As you suspected, there is damage from the... abrupt severing of the valkyrie bond," he said reluctantly to Hela. "The damage drains her life force."

"Fix it, Odin Borson," Hela invited him through clenched teeth.

"I am unsure if I can," he admitted after a tense moment.

"What?" Hela bellowed, and began to berate him for his temper. I got to my feet while they were arguing and they shut up abruptly.

"I'll be right back," I said, not looking at either of them, and left the room. I went directly to the library, where Tony was installing his lights. He was talking to a few people interested in his project, but he excused himself immediately when he saw me.

"Alex, what's wrong?" he asked, touching my cheek.

"I went to Asgard today, you know, training Magni." He nodded. "While we were working, I felt weak, so I had him bout with a guardsman then came back and talked to Hela. She brought Odin back. He said there's damage from where he broke the valkyrie bond. It's draining my life force, and he doesn't know if he can fix it. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed and I would really appreciate it if you came to help me sort all this out," I said, blinking against tears. As he listened, his expression went flat and grim, and he gathered me to him for a hug and kiss.

"Of course. You don't have to do this alone."

"I know. That's why I came to you," I told him, smiling as much as I could. His expression warmed and gentled.

"Means everything to me that you think that. Let me just shut off the generator and then we'll go get this all straightened out, Alex."

So I waited a few moments as he shut down his project and returned to me, offering his arm. We went back where the gods waited.

"I'd ask how you could do something like this, but--" he said nastily to Odin, who for the first time had no comeback. "The shit's really going to hit the fan when Barnes finds out what you've done to his niece."

"I don't really understand that expression," Odin said, puzzled, then dismissed it. "It was not my intent." Tony settled me in a chair and didn't bother to dispute the claim, instead asking for clarification and amplitude of the information I had.

"Her vitality is considerably diminished," Odin said reluctantly. "It would have been made worse with her visits to Valhalla and proximity to me. The bond was severed incompletely; it seeks to reestablish itself and, lacking the ability to do so on its own, uses her force in an attempt to complete the bond."

"Fix it," Tony said, rage strangling his words. "Get rid of that bond thing, and by god, you'd better do it gently, or I will make it my life's mission to destroy yours."

"I cannot remove the bond entirely," Odin said somberly, not provoked by Tony's outburst. "The damage caused by the breakage prevents it. The only solution I can propose is the reestablishment of the bond."

"And then you can remove it the right way?" Tony asked, still enraged.

"No," Odin said after a pregnant pause. "If the bond was reestablished--and it is possible that this might not be possible--it would be permanent. The damage has been done; like a scar, it will always be present, but reestablishment of the bond would restore the balance of the bond within her and her vitality would restore itself. Otherwise, she will fade away, ceasing to exist in this plane or any other."

"So her choices are to have her essence fade or to return to Valhalla," Hela said flatly.

"Yes." Odin.

"So I'd have to go back to Valhalla and become a valkyrie again," I said expressionlessly.

"Yes. But because of the... nature of your return, you could have considerable discretion in the work that you would do, once you recover. The only thing that cannot be negotiated is the choosing of souls. And it will take some time for your vitality to replace what was lost."

"I would be coming with her," Tony said, still sounding murderous. Odin nodded.

"I would expect that. You also would have the freedom to determine your work, once she is recovered."

"Not much of a choice," I muttered to Tony, and he stroked my hair.

"Not really, Tiger."

I looked at Hela. "Could you bring my uncle here? In case this fails, I'd like to be able to say goodbye."

"Of course." She glared at Odin. "In fact, Odin will bring him and can explain himself." Odin wasn't happy, but he stepped away from us and faded.

"Do you really think it's not going to work?" Tony asked me, his face going ashy.

"No, I'm pretty sure it will," I said on a sigh. "It's sort of a 'just in case' measure, like the possibility of something happening when you go in for minor surgery. The bond wants to be completed. But this way it can't be swept under the rug. Bucky's going to raise hell and Thor and Loki will also find out about it. And Sif and Magni. His life is going to be a living hell for awhile." Hela's grave face split into a smile.

"Marvelous," she said. "And no less than he deserves."

"I hate to leave the library half-done," Tony said to her, holding my hand. "But Alex comes first."

She nodded. "I understand, of course. Once she is recovered, I could bring you back to work."

"Or I could, once I'm able," I volunteered. "It sounds like I'm going to be out of commission work-wise for awhile."

Hela smiled at me. "You are always welcome here. But when the bond is reestablished, you will probably need to be taken to Valhalla; it will be easier for the bond to fully recover there. I can have your things packed up while we wait so that you will have them around you while you heal. Tony's too, of course." She sent people to our rooms and to collect my things from the weaving room and the smithies as well. Tony would complete his work and pack up his workshop when he was done.

"We can stay in my quarters if you'd like," he offered.

"We'll have to dust first," I said, then Bruce was brought in and the situation explained to him.

"Well, I'm coming with you," he said immediately. "No offense, Hela."

"I understand," she said, nodding. "Go pack up your things."

Bruce was back with his possessions all bundled up before Odin returned. He brought with him not just my uncle, but also his wife and Steve and Emma. Frigga's glare should have turned Odin to stone, my uncle was cursing in words and phrases I'd never heard him use, and Steve and Emma were also pissed. Bucky finally stopped swearing and crouched down by my chair.

"You're not looking so good, sweetie," he said, failing to suppress a quaver in his voice.

"Well, we're going to try this thing, which I think will work. But if it doesn't, I wanted to be able to say goodbye." Despite my best efforts, my eyes welled up. I looked between him and Tony. "I don't have the words to express how much you both mean to me. It's been an honor and a privilege to know you." I sobbed inadvertently, and that set off Bucky. Tony looked like his heart was breaking. "Come on, Odin," I managed to say. "You'd better do your best."

He didn't reply, just placed his hand above my skin, and the golden flow of energy appeared, twisting like it had the first time. And then it went out.

My blood froze. I hadn't been lying, I'd thought this would really work. "Do it again!" I gasped, and Odin tried two more times. Two more failures.

"I am sorry," Odin muttered, and stepped back. I closed my eyes, trying not to let my freakout bloom. Around me, chaos was breaking out. I only opened my eyes when I heard Thor bellow at his father. When had he arrived? Then I heard Loki, his smooth voice irritated and anxious.

"Do it again, Odin," he said testily. "Barnes, sheath your sword. Nobody does their best work with a blade to the throat." I opened my eyes to see that Bucky was indeed threatening Odin with his weapon. Tony tugged Bucky around the chair to stand beside him, and Odin tried again. Again, the bond failed to take.

"Ah," Loki said, the strain in his voice smoothing out. "I see what the problem is." He engaged Odin in a technical discussion that I didn't bother to pay attention to. The trials were taking a lot out of me, and the bond seemed frustrated that the attempts to reconnect weren't working.

"Alex," Loki said, turning to me. "It is not simply a matter of the bond reestablishing itself. You must be willing to do this. I understand that this is not your first choice, but you must find reasons to truly accept the duty again." I huffed out a breath and looked at him. "Odin has said that your duties are subject to revision. And you will still have your family and friends."

"Odin owes you reparation for the harm he has caused. And far more than a pretty dress or warm cloak," Frigga added, stepping beside Loki. "I understand why you would not want to answer to him again, given all that has passed between you, but consider the changes that you bargained for will also apply to you. However, there is nothing that cannot be negotiated in good faith, and with mediators and witnesses if you want," she added, and Odin looked even more hangdog than before.

"All right," I said grimly. I couldn't lose Tony now, didn't want to leave him under any circumstances. I looked through my memory to remember how it was when I took the bond the first time. Man, how dumb I'd been. But I held to the remembered desire to serve; I couldn't hang on to the pride and other emotions I had felt then. "One more time." I blew out a breath as Odin stepped up again.

This time, it took. I sighed, rubbing my temple, then my chest, where the pain had subsided.

"Alex?" Tony said, his voice tight with tension.

"It worked," I said wearily. The drain on my energy had stopped. This must be what it feels like when a dam is repaired. Bucky came around and patted my cheek, kissing my forehead, looking utterly relieved.

"This isn't over," he hissed at Odin, before sheathing his sword and stepping back.

"Alex?" Tony crouched in front of me. "Oh, god, are you ok?"

"Depleted," I said, then smiled at him. "But it's been fixed."

"Oh, my darling," he said, looking as washed out as I felt. "Well, let's get you settled in. I'll get the bed changed when we get there so you can rest. I'll clean it later."

"You're taking her to your quarters?" Emma asked, and Tony nodded.

"Familiar territory."

She nodded too. "Well, I'll come with you. I'll help clean up, then you won't have anything to worry about, you can just take care of Alex."

"It's been a shock for both of you," Steve said, clapping Tony on the shoulder, making him sway a bit. Tony rolled his eyes.

"We'll all help," Bucky said. "Then you can take care of our girl." I wanted to protest the use of the word 'girl'--hadn't been one since high school--but I lacked the energy and the inclination to correct my uncle. So we had a crowd when we appeared in Valhalla at Tony's workshop. He brought a chair out of the workshop into the warming early spring air and settled me in it, tucking his cape around me just in case of chills, then disappeared briefly while he showed Emma where he kept cleaning supplies in the workshop. I saw her go into his quarters and emerge with an armful of cloth, then he escorted her to the main complex to drop off the laundry and get fresh sheets and towels. I heard wood being chopped and Bucky go into Tony's rooms with rags and a jar of polish. I closed my eyes for a little nap.

When I woke up, I was in Tony's bed, and he was asleep, engulfing me like he had after our first Thrimilcy. Unlike then, when I tried to wiggle away, he woke up completely. "How are you feeling?" he asked instantly.

"Better. Still dragged out but less tired," I said, touching his face and kissing him lightly. "But I have to use the bathroom."

"It's late afternoon, and dinner will be served soon," he said. "So you go, do your thing, and I'll bring back something to eat. You need to get your energy back. You're looking poorly, Tiger."

"Ok," I said. "Then maybe, since you have an en suite bathroom, perhaps you'd like to take a bath with me?"

"That's the best idea I've heard all day," he said, kissing me. I snorted and he grinned. "Food, then a long snuggle with my one and only in a nice hot bath."

"I love you, Tony. I don't say it enough, but I do."

"I'll never hear that enough," he said, blinking. "And I love you too. I unpacked your stuff, just to move you in, so you'll probably need to hunt around a little to find where your things are. Feel free to arrange things any way you want. I'll be back soon." He kissed me again and rolled out of bed. I used the bathroom, then hunted up the robe that I'd finally made, stripping off the clothes that I'd been wearing since working with Magni. I'd gotten all sweaty then but had forgotten it in the ensuing drama. A bath with Tony was looking better and better, but I took a quick shower first, washing away the grime and some of the tension. I always felt better when I was clean, and Tony deserved better than me stinking from exertion and stress.

I came out and had cleared the table of things that hadn't been put away yet, finishing as the door opened and Tony came in with a tray heaped with food and a pitcher. "Just water," he said as I helped him place everything on the table. "And I've arranged our meals to be brought here for the next few days until you start to improve." He'd brought a thick stew with a salad of early greens, crusty bread, and spice cakes. I sniffed the delicious smells and dove right in. I'd missed lunch with all the drama and was starving. We are quickly and without much conversation, then Tony piled the tray with the dishes and took it outside to be collected. I went into the bathroom and started the bath, adding some relaxing mineral salts. When he came into the room, I was shocked by how exhausted he looked and helped him out of his clothes before taking off my robe. I slid my arms around his trim waist and snuggled up to him, the simple skin-to-skin contact reassuring. His arms went around me and he sighed. "Life with you, Tiger, is always exciting."

"You'd probably be better off with somebody less chaotic," I admitted, resting my head on his shoulder.

"Never," he breathed. "All I need is fewer of these little moments of terror." I snorted agreement, and we stood there for a few more moments before our arms loosened and we stepped apart. He helped me into the bathtub, then stepped in and settled in with a groan. I sat between his legs and laced our fingers together when his arms went around me again.

"So I know that you really liked working in the smithy in Helheim," he said after a period of silence. "I know that your weapons are made for you here, but I bet you could have your own smithy here, keep making those blades you like. You could have one out here, by my workshop. You could have pretty much anything you wanted. We could work near each other. I mean sure, that sounds kind of clingy, but I don't care." His hands began to roam my body, not for erotic effect, more like he was just making sure I was there.

"That would be nice," I said. "I also like spinning, and for weaving I'd have to use the big looms in the valkyries' shop, but I could spend a lot of time out here, I bet. If you don't mind, I could spin in your workshop. It's cleaner than a smithy will be."

"I like that a lot," he said, petting my breast. We stayed like that for awhile, sometimes talking, sometimes silent, until the water started to cool and we got out. I taught him how to French braid my hair, and we went to bed. That was kind of my pattern for the rest of the week; I slept a lot, ate when I was awake, and cuddled up to Tony; he seemed fine with providing quality snuggles. Gradually my awake periods got longer, and we went over to his shop too, cleaning first, then he started figuring out what he needed to continue his work for Hela in this workshop.

One afternoon we were interrupted by the arrival of Bucky and Steve, carrying a very large chair with them. They dropped it in the grass between the workshop and our quarters. I got up and went to give my uncle a big hug, Steve a lighter one. "You're looking better, sweetie," Bucky said, peering at me anxiously. "You've got some color in your cheeks, the circles under your eyes are lighter."

"She's still got a ways to go," Tony said, putting his arm around my waist. "But she's improving."

"You looked like death on a plate," Emma said, dumping a pile of cushions on the monster chair. "Anything would be an improvement, dear."

"Well, we thought that fresh air would be good for you," Steve said, motioning to the chair. "So I built a chair big enough for both you and Tony. The front of the chair can be put down so it's a real chair or put up so you have a short chaise. The back reclines to about a forty-five degree angle. Emma made the pillows for comfort, and we figured you could nap out here on nice days."

Just then, Bruce arrived with a smaller, more traditional chair. "This one's for your part of the shop," Steve continued. "I saw the sewing machine and Emma said you do a lot of handwork, so you have someplace nice to sit in there as well." Tony smiled and took the chair from his out-of-breath friend over to the workshop. I went ahead and held the door. He placed the chair in front of the windows and told me to try it out. It was a variation of a Morris chair, comfortable, with nice wide arms and a back high enough that I could rest my head on it. Emma had a cushion for this one too, and I thanked her and Steve again.

"And the next few scrimmages are over here," Bucky told me, patting my hand. "So I can drop in on you, see how you're doing."

"This is so nice," I said. "I can't thank you enough." Another round of hugs.

"Before the scrimmage, Frigga wondered if you were able to speak with her," Bucky said.

"I haven't left here since I got back," I said, yawning. "I've just been sleeping and eating, with gradually increasing periods of wakefulness. I think I can handle a conversation." Tony insisted on us waiting while he went to get my stole, just in case it was cooler in the main hall, then we all walked back. The walk wasn't terribly long and not hard, but it still tired me out and I was grateful to sink down onto a bench. Both Frigga and Odin waited.

"You look better, though not as recovered as I'd hoped," she said to me.

"I feel better, it's just that I get tired more easily,' I said, trying to suppress a yawn. Odin waved his hand and the the valkyrie bond smoked into visibility. Some parts were strong and bright, but other places still looked rather fragile. It looked a lot like a vine that had been damaged when somebody impatiently twisted it to remove it. He frowned slightly.

"The bond is repairing the damage done," he said. "The damage was extensive and it will take time to complete. Until the bond is healthy and vital again, it would be risky to attempt too much effort. You have no duties until it is repaired."

"But Hela thought you might like a project while you recover," Frigga said, and handed over a large cloth bag filled with the soft, downy undercoat of Helheim's rabbits. I smiled a little, it would provide a challenge; you could spin it tight and produce a very fine, strong thread, but the loft of the fiber would be lost. I liked it soft and fluffy. There wasn't enough for a large project like a shawl or sweater, but maybe enough for a hood for next winter...

"I look forward to thanking Hela soon," I told Frigga, and she smiled.

"Alex? What are you doing here?" I was hugged by Carol before I could say anything. "I'm so glad you're here, anyway. We can really use your help, it's crazy. There's so much to be done. The backlog on the souls alone--" she shook her head. "You retrieved more souls than anyone at a go."

"I won't be helping for awhile," I said flatly. I looked at Odin, who was still uncharacteristically subdued, and he provided an exceedingly terse explanation of what had happened, making sure she knew that my actions as the valkyries' advocate had made the damage worse by provoking the remnants of the bond. Part of me was meanly glad that this was being stated; I'd felt that my actions were the right thing to do, but it hadn't done me any favors and I kind of wanted the price I'd paid to be acknowledged.

"Alex, I'm sorry," Carol said awkwardly. "I didn't know."

"It wouldn't have made a difference if you'd have known," Bucky said, scowling. "You got everything you wanted, then you were all off with a 'thanks' and a hug, not even a mention of a visit, not so much as a backward glance. You didn't even ask how she was or wait for an answer about why she was here, it was all about what else she could do for you so you could slack off. And Alex might not recover fully. That's what you're worried about, isn't it?" he said, rounding on Odin. "That's why you looked worried when you saw the state of the bond."

"There is that possibility," Odin acknowledged. "But it is only a possibility. This situation has never happened before. I think it unlikely; the bond has grown much stronger since it was reestablished. It is repairing itself." In the background, I could hear Emma quietly talking a riled-up Bucky down.

Carol darted a look between Odin and me. "I am sorry, Alex," she said quietly. "You're at Tony's? I'll stop by later to talk."

"I sleep a lot," I said, covering another yawn with my hand.

"If she's asleep, you'll have to come back another time," Tony said neutrally. "No waking her up." She nodded, remembered that she had a message for Odin about the scrimmage that was waiting for the gods to start and left.

"We must begin," Odin said, and Frigga nodded.

"I will tell Hela that you are improving," she said to me, and I thanked her. She gestured to Steve, and he, Bucky, and Emma got up.

"We'll be back next time," Steve said to me. "I'm looking forward to your continued improvement." I cracked a smile at his awkwardness, then Emma gave me a hug, followed by Bucky.

"Calm down," I urged him, wishing that there was flannel here. There was just something so comforting about an Uncle Bucky Hug With Added Flannel. "I really am getting better. And the next time you come by, I'll be even better." He sighed.

"Be sure to ask if you need something," he instructed me. "Rest up, use your new chairs." I smiled.

"I will, Uncle Bucky," I said, hugging him again. "Now go and kick some butt." He smiled at that, then followed the others out the door. Tony and I started walking back home, at a nice slow pace. He tried really hard not to be smothering, and succeeded for the most part, but he was concerned and it showed. After I drank some water for hydration, he installed me on the big outside chair, slightly repositioned so he could see it from his shop, covered me with a light blanket, and left me to my nap while he did some work in the shop.