Say what you wanna say
Tony didn’t know what to say so he let Steve do the talking first.
“What’s going on with you? You’re acting… weird” Steve asked. He knew Tony was a weird individual but this was not his kind of weird that he was used to.
Tony shrugged his shoulders. He wasn’t sure exactly how he was supposed to explain it. “I just… it doesn’t feel right. Walking around and looking at all these tiny babies like we’re just supposed to what? Pick one out like we’re at the grocery store picking out the best looking watermelon”
Steve went to place his hand on Tony’s leg but then he thought better of it. He could tell that Tony felt weird about the whole thing but he was so occupied with the babies that he didn’t think much of it.
“It’s not like that, Tony. You act like we’re doing this because we have to rather than because this is what we want” Steve leaned back in his chair “If-if you don’t think you’re ready to adopt a baby right now then-then we can wait a little bit longer. Talk about it more”
Tony knew Steve did not want what he was suggesting. Tony didn’t want that either if he was being honest but he wanted something different than what Steve wanted.
“No. I don’t want that” Tony said quietly. “I just… I don’t think I want a baby.”
Steve leaned closer to Tony. He was confused now. “What do you mean? You just said-“
“What about Peter?” Tony blurted out. Something about Peter was just… Tony couldn’t explain it but he felt some connection there.
“Peter? The four year old?” Steve asked confused. He only glanced at the child. He was more focused on the baby he was holding rather than the four year old that Tony was playing with. He didn’t really pay no mind to him.
Tony nodded “Yeah. The little boy with that crazy curly hair and his big brown eyes. Allison says he loves building stuff and he’s really smart. Like really smart”
“Tony, he’s four though. I thought we agreed on adopting a baby” Steve practically pouted. He wanted to experience every stage in the child’s life.
“I know that but he’s close enough to a baby” Tony argued.
Steve sighed. “It’s not the same. I want to experience diaper changes and bath times, co-sleeping, crying all night kinds of exhaustion and potty training. I want to experience everything there is to experience raising a child, Tony”
“Well, technically if you listened to Allison, Peter isn’t potty trained yet so I mean…” Tony tried to argue and he could see that Steve was thinking about it. “Let’s just talk to Allison some more and see what she saids”
Steve sighed but agreed. Tony pressed the button then they waited for Allison to arrive.
“Have you guys talked about things? You know, you don’t have to feel pressured into adopting a child right this minute. I know it’s a huge deal and you shouldn’t feel like you have to adopt a baby today if you don’t want to” Allison said as she got comfortable in her seat across the desk.
“Actually,” Steve began “we were wondering if you could tell us more about Peter. The four year old”
Allison’s smile grew wider as she looked over at Tony before typing something into the computer. “Well, I’ll tell you everything you need to know, including what I’ve already told you, just so you know”
Both husbands nodded so Allison began explaining. “His name is Peter Benjamin Parker, born August tenth. His parents died in a plane crash when he was three and was found in the care of his babysitter at the time, from there he came to us and has been here ever since. He really is a great kid and cares so much about you, if you show any sort of sadness in front of him he’ll try his best to comfort you to make you feel better.”
“Why hasn’t he been adopted yet?” Tony asked. He didn’t understand how this adorable child hasn’t gotten adopted yet.
“Well, it’s a lot harder for the older children to get adopted because mostly everyone wants a baby. Actually, Peter was going to get adopted about a month ago but he just didn’t adjust to the couple at all” Allison explained sadly. “He would cry when they came and refused to leave anywhere with them, all visits were supervised so they didn’t hurt him but Peter just didn’t like them. The fit has to work for both parents and child, not just for the parents”
Tony and Steve both nodded in understanding. Tony couldn’t help but feel happy at the story that Allison just told because now Peter can be his and Steve’s. He felt selfish for thinking that but he didn’t care.
“What about his development and all that? You said he was still in diapers?” Steve asked. He wanted to know everything there was to know about Peter if he was going to consider it.
“Well, yes. Peter is a bit slow in developing I think because his parents died at such a young age where he’s able to remember having parents but not able to remember what they were like, if that makes sense” Allison tried to explain “Peter is not potty trained and is having a hard time picking up on it, especially because we can only since we can only spend so much time on him. He is currently wearing pull-ups and diapers, he ranges between the day. When he’s not having a very good day we put him in diapers but if he’s in a good mood we’ll put him in pull-ups to try the potty training again”
Steve felt like a horrible person but he was happy to hear that. He wanted to potty train his kid and make memories and if Peter still didn’t know how to wear underwear yet then he could help him.
“How far is he into the potty training?” Steve asked.
“Hmm, well not as far as we’d like. I don’t want to say the beginning but it basically is just because Peter refuses to sit on the potty or put on underwear so it’s been rough but we’re taking our time” Allison pulled up a file out of the drawer. “In this file we have a few pictures of Peter when he was a baby that we found in his old house. Normally we don’t get pictures of the children but we were able to in this case so we did. Just so Peter can look at the pictures when he’s older if he wants to. Would you like to see them?”
Both Steve and Tony nodded so Allison placed ten pictures in front of them. The first picture was a picture of Peter when he must have been born. Then there were pictures of him in a high chair covered in food, at the park, and in a pile of leaves. Tony recognizes those big brown eyes anywhere.
“Would you guys like to talk it over? What are you thinking?” Allison asked. Tony and Steve looked at each other knowing exactly what the other one was thinking, that happens after five years of marriage.
“Would we be able to see him?” Tony asked. He really wanted to see Peter again.
“Absolutely. You guys can come with me” Allison stood up and motioned for the husbands to follow her so they did. They stopped in front of the rainbow door again and Allison pushed it open and gestured for them to go inside. “I’m going to go get him and I’ll bring him back here”
As Tong and Steve waited for Allison to bring Peter in, Tony turned to Steve. “What do you think of him so far?”
“From everything Allison told us, I think he’s an amazing kid, Tony, but I haven’t actually met him yet” Steve was partly lying. From everything Allison was telling him, he was falling in love with the kid the same way Tony seemed to be and he loved that Tony was feeling this way with him.
They didn’t have to wait long because before they knew it, Allison was opening the door and bringing in Peter who was holding her hand with a huge smile on his face.
He immediately let go of her hand and ran over towards the blue slide where Tony saw him on before.
“Sorry. I told him he was meeting some people but he was more excited to be coming back into this room” Allison laughed it off then followed Peter over to the slide and sat down with Tony and Steve following her. “Hey, Peter, how about you come and sit with us for a second”
Peter went down the slide on his stomach and slid to the bottom, laughing. Once he stopped, he crawled over to Allison and sat on his knees.
“Peter, this is Tony and Steve” Allison pointed to them then Peter’s eyes landed on Tony and he smiled.
“He has stuffy!” Peter announced excitedly. He stood up and did this little dance with his butt sticking out which caused all adults to laugh at.
“Yeah, they want to talk and play with you for a bit if that’s okay with you?” Allison asked Peter who had stopped dancing.
“Yeah! I wan’ show ‘em my slide!” Peter said excitedly as he bounced up and down.
Allison gave Tony and Steve a nod of encouragement as she stood up and left to give them some privacy.
Tony didn’t feel uncomfortable like he did being in this room before. He felt like this was where he was supposed to be, with him, Steve and Peter.
“Wanna show us how you slide down the slide, buddy?” Tony asked. He sat crossed legged so that he could get more comfortable to watch Peter.
“Yeah! I show you!” Peter then climbed to the top of the play plastic slide and put his arms up to show them he was about to go down. “I did it!”
“You sure did, kid” Tony said as he watched Peter amused. Steve sat back and admired Tony watching Peter with such a soft look on his face that he’d never seen on Tony before.
“Wan’ see my flip?” Peter asked Tony in particular since he was the only one interacting with him at the moment.
“Your flip? I’d love to” Tony moved back a bit so he could let Peter use the mats for a flip. Tony’s first instinct was to reach out and grab Peter once the kid flipped over but he didn’t need to since Peter caught himself. It was more of a roll in Tony’s opinion but it was still amazing.
“Is it good?” Peter asked looking up at Tony with his big brown eyes. He crawled over to the man and used his knees as a balance to help him stand up which Tony thought was adorable.
“It was amazing” Tony said then looked over at Steve who was being uncharacteristically quiet. Steve had a huge smile on his face as he watched the two of them interact so fondly together. As if it was always meant to be.
Steve felt like he never wanted this moment to end. Ever.
Although the universe seemed to have other plans because Allison was walking over to them with a sad smile on her face. “I’m sorry to break up the fun you guys are having but Peter here needs to sit on the potty and have his nap”
Peter stood up, crossed his arms and stomped his foot. Tony then saw same pouty face of the boy when he saw him for the very first time today and he’s guessing that it was for the same reason as before.
Allison bent down so she was at eye level with Peter “You have to try and go pee before nap time”
Peter shook his head “Don’ needa go! I went al’eady”
“You already used the potty?” Allison asked with some pride in her voice but Peter shook his head.
“No! I went in my diaper!” Peter said as if it an accomplishment then turned around and started climbing up the slide again.
Both Steve and Tony laughed and then gave Allison a comical look. She shook her head but smiled anyways. “Everyday. This isn’t even the half of it. Anyways, Peter please say goodbye to Tony and Steve please”
Peter looked up at Tony as if Tony just kicked his puppy. The face broke Tony’s heart “You leavin’? Wha’ bout stuffy?”
“Yeah, we’re leaving now, buddy and I don’t know where stuffy went” Tony shrugged his shoulders but his heart was breaking as he stood up and stepped away from Peter because he had to go.
Peter ran over to him and lifted his arms up. Tony looked to Allison confused because he’s never held a kid before but she just gestured to him with a smile on her face so Tony reached down and picked the child up.
He had him awkwardly in his arms at first but then he remembered how Allison held him that one time so he tried to mirror it. Peter wrapped his arms around Tony’s neck and smiled at him.
“Imma miss you” Peter said as he hugged Tony the best he could with his tiny arms. He then peeled away and reached over for Steve to hold him.
“Oh um…” Steve looked caught off guard but he took Peter from Tony’s arms anyways and held him a lot more easily than Tony had. Peter hugged Steve the same way he hugged Tony then he peeled away again.
“Are you gon’ come back and visit me ‘gin?” Steve smiled at Peter’s pronunciation but shrugged his shoulders looking over at Tony with a smile on his face.
He could tell that Tony was thinking the same thing as him.
Allison took Peter from Steve’s arms and handed him off to another worker which caused Peter to start crying who then took a crying Peter into the back room where Steve guesses was where the bathrooms were.
“Sorry about that” Allison said tiredly. “He’s just had a hard time adjusting to the whole room switch and everything”
Tony and Steve followed Allison out of the room as they gave each other knowing looks.
“Um, can we actually speak with you in your office?” Steve asked. He smiled at Tony knowing what was about to happen.
Allison turned to give Tony and Steve a knowing yet confused look as well as she led them there.
Tony didn’t want to wait any longer so he spoke first “We would like to adopt Peter”
The husbands didn’t wait to see Allison’s reaction because they immediately turned to look at each other. It was the little moments like this, both of them turning to look at each other at each other at the same time knowing exactly what the other person is thinking that makes this big moment all the more enjoyable.
“Are you serious? You want to adopt Peter?” Allison asked excitedly while also still trying to be professional. She leaned forward in her chair a bit more so she could be closer to the husbands.
“Yeah, Uh, we talked about it and we just Uh, we want to adopt him. We want to make him our son” Steve couldn’t contain the excitement in his voice. He was unbelievably happy right now. Words couldn’t even describe how happy he is.
“That’s… wow. I’m so happy. Peter is so lucky to be getting placed in a home, I’m just so happy for him” Allison looked as if she was about to cry but she quickly gathered herself and began pulling up a bunch of files on the computer for Tony and Steve to see.
.
.
.
“I can’t believe this is actually happening, Tony” Steve wrapped his arms around Tony’s waist as Tony leaned against their kitchen counter and sipped his coffee.
They talked with Allison about adoption and legal things, the boring but necessary part of adoption, for about thirty minutes before they left. It was to be arranged that Tony and Steve come back at the end of the week to meet with Peter again and see how well they all bond together.
They had asked if they could see Peter one more time before they left but Allison said that she didn’t want Peter to get too stressed out at all the constant moving from room to room and meeting new people so they couldn’t. It just let them become more excited and happy to see Peter again at the end of the week.
Tony turned around so his chest was now against Steve’s chest. “Hmm, I’m happy too. It’s crazy how life turns out. We expected to be adopting a baby today and instead we’re going to be adopting a four year old”
Steve pressed a kiss to Tony’s forehead “I love how that turned out. I’m so happy right now, Tony”
Tony and Steve were so ready to become a family with Peter and they couldn’t wait to see him again during their visit.