Guardian Angels Can Die
The Avengers were all silent. They were all in the common area’s living room, waiting for news about Steve and Natasha. They were the only two that had been affected by the foam in any way at all, but Natasha just got a nasty cold and a mild rash on her back while Steve had almost died. The foam had been acidic to Steve’s skin, burning holes in his arms and legs as his lungs were torn apart from the small amount of the rainbow vomit that he had accidentally inhaled. Bruce was working on helping the two recover from the ordeal, but everyone was silently panicking, knowing that Steve probably wouldn’t be able to come back from this one.
Anyone left alive from the 1940s that Steve knew would have been called, but since only Peggy Carter was left alive and she didn’t remember him, she was left from the call list. That left only one person, and Tony was desperate to do whatever he could for the dying soldier, so he ran to his lab that was next to Bruce’s to pull up as much information about the Winter Soldier that he possibly could. All he knew about the guy was that Steve had destroyed three helicarriers and half of Washington DC to save him from Hydra, and if that didn’t mean that this man was super fucking important, than nothing possibly could. So, Tony brought up everything he could, from fuzzy sightings in the 50s to murder speculations in the SHEILD database. Tony shuddered whenever he came across any information having to do with the brainwashing of James Barnes, knowing full well what it felt like to have a vital part of yourself taken away by constant abuse. (Fucking thanks Dad. Not.) Tony just kept searching for anything he could until someone came into the lab and he quickly shut everything down to keep people from prying. Turning, he saw his science bro and let out a sigh of relief, letting himself turn the computers back on because Bruce knew. Bruce knew everything about Tony, not as much as Rhodey per say, but close to everything. “Hey Bruce. How are they doing? Does Natasha still have that nasty cold?”
Bruce sighed, looking at the computer screens covered in information about Sergeant James Barnes, knowing fully well that Tony just wanted the information on a certain soldier. “Steve’s going steady. No better, but thankfully no worse either.” He paused, walking over to Tony and sitting on his desk, playing with the fabric of his shirt. “His blood tests are a fucked up mess though. That foam stuff is acting like some sort of antibody and trying to eradicate his blood altogether like it’s some sort of virus.” Bruce fell silent and looked uncomfortable as Tony rubbed his hands over his face.
“That’s not the worst part.” Tony bent over in his chair, bracing his elbows on his knees as he put his head between his legs to stop the thoughts swimming around in his brain. “Is it? Something’s terribly wrong. Right?”
Bruce bit his lip, trying to tame the nervousness. “He isn’t healing.”
“What?” Tony’s head shot up. “What do you mean?”
Bruce sighed. “It’s exactly like I just said. Usually, there are certain things that happen to a human body when it starts to close an open wound. You know, some really tell tale signs. The thing is, Steve usually has the serum in his blood speed up the process of healing a lot faster than a normal human, but now when the healing is supposed to begin, there is nothing. It doesn't start at all and I can’t fix it. He isn’t even healing like a normal human being. He just… isn’t able to.”
Tony glared at Bruce menacingly. “You do know that I’m not as stupid as I look. You don’t have to dumb it down for me. I know science shit too.”
Bruce rolled his eyes. “Not when you are this stressed Tony. I can tell that what I just said now went completely over your head.”
Tony moved to protest, but thought better of it because Bruce was 100% correct. “Dammit Bruce.” He rubbed his eyes, leaning back on his chair and trying to talk past the lump in his throat. “Is he… how… god fucking dammit.” He paused, taking a deep breath. “Can I see him?”
Bruce sighed with pity in his eyes. “I’ll let you in for a bit, but you can’t tell anyone else.” Tony nodded and jumped to his feet when Bruce started walking back to his lab and leading Tony to the quarantine section where both Steve and Natasha were residing currently. Tony could feel the spy eyeing him through the glass on her door as he fidgeted nervously while waiting for Bruce to enter the passcode and scan his card. Before Tony could go running into the room though, Bruce placed a hand on his chest. “Tony, I want you to know that he might look really bad right now, but I’m going to do my best to make this right.” The genius nodded and pushed forward desperately, being stopped by Bruce once again. “I’m just letting you know now that I’m only alowing you in because I know how you feel and I know that if you weren’t such a giant dick to him back in 2011, you would already be fucking married to him.” Tony pushed forward silently, his eyes trying to make it past the metal door in front of him and into the room. “Look at me Tony!” Finally, he snapped out of it and looked at Bruce in the eye for the first time since he had entered Tony’s lab. “If Steve gets out of this, and that is a ridiculously giant IF, you either spill your metaphorical guts to the man of your dreams or I spill your literal guts in front of Avengers Tower.”
Tony paled at the serious look Bruce gave him before he heard a hilariously stuffed up voice echo in the hallway. “Only if you get to that idiot before I do Bruce. He just made Steve do some fucking rediculous ass shit and nearly get himself killed because he thought he had something to prove.” Natasha glared straight at Tony, looking him in the eye with something close to hatred. “Ever since you came falling out of that wormhole, Steve has changed, trying to prove to you time and time again that he is a good man and deserves to be on the Avengers. Stop treating him like shit so that he can finally feel like he belongs here instead of staying up all night so he doesn't have nightmares and wishing he died on that damn plane.” She pointed through the glass right at Tony’s chest. “You’ve fallen for a good man Stark, so you better start treating him like the guardian angel he is for you. Got it?"
Tony nodded seriously before pushing Bruce's hand and diving into the unlocked room, gently closing the door behind him so that he wouldn't make any loud noises. He was alone in the silent white room, the white lights over head giving a comfortable feeling instead of the dying hospital vibe. There were no windows except from the one in the door and the bed was in the middle of the room, headboard pushed up against the far wall. Steve was laying still on the bed, hooked up to machines that read his heartbeat and blood pressure, but also one that was keeping him breathing. Tony walked over the bed slowly, the smell of blood and medicine making him wary of what he would see when he got close enough. Pulling the chair from the side of Steve's bed close enough to sit on, Tony lowered himself down, looking at the blonde's bandaged face. He lightly brushed his fingers over the bandages covering Steve's left eye and cheek, wrapping around his head, and a large patch covering his right cheek. The rough fabric-like material was thick and layered because according to what Bruce said, Steve was still bleeding because his body didn't process that he was hurt or some shit and there had to be something to keep all of the blood from escaping his body. Tony bit his lip, pulling the blanket back a little to see Steve's whole neck and chest covered in a heavy layer of bandages, all of them trailing down to his stomach, waist, hips… and most likely farther, but Tony didn't dare look. He did move the blankets up to where Steve always kept them, almost pulled up to his ears and tucked under his chin, knowing this because of his occasional nightmares about the blonde dying after Ultron. He had just asked Friday to keep an eye on Steve and possibly bring up the live video feed every so often so Tony could make sure that the soldier was sleeping peacefully and was still very much alive. Most of the time when he checked up on Steve, he was awake past a time that even Tony would deem exhausting, just sitting in the common room while doing paperwork or watching a movie while talking to Natasha. Whenever he seemed alone though, Tony would go to the common room and just lean on the doorframe for a few minutes to an hour until he felt like sitting next to the blonde or trying to go back to sleep. Tony never started a conversation though, and right now, he wished that he had spoken to the soldier more often so that he would know just how much pain he was in and possibly wake up. He just sighed, reaching under the blanket to take Steve's hand and pulling it out so that he could see if the bandaged hand would twitch at all. Tony took a deep breath, tears welling up in his eyes as he looked at Steve's pale face covered with bandages. "Hey there Capsicle. I hope you're having a lot of fun wherever you are in your mind right now. Shit. That was insensitive wasn't it and it sounded like I did this on purpose. Let me try again?" There was no answer from the still soldier and Tony nearly cried, but he kept it under control by remembering what Natasha had said. Treat him like the guardian angel he was. "Hey Angel. I'm sorry I made you feel like you had to save me. I was being a child and I could have just walked over to you through that stupid foam if I wasn't so obsessed with how my hair looked or what I was wearing. I just want to let you know that I'm okay, so you did a really good job in saving me, even if I did almost kill you. Bruce tells me that you aren't doing to well considering how much blood you lost and the fact that you are probably dying. If you keep this up for much longer, then you're going to need a blood transfusion and that's pretty bad news considering that I can't find the one person who could possibly help you with that, both of you being super soldiers and all." Tony wiped away his tears with one hand and smiled at the unresponsive blonde. "I know that we have the Avengers now, but sometimes, it just gets really lonely without you because I feel like you're family to me. If I wasn't such a coward, I would have asked you out already, and gotten to know your past, and I would have been able to help you with your war trauma, and… just and. I could have done anything for you if you asked despite how fucking stupid I am. I just really want to be there for you, but it's hard when the only thing I'm good at is fucking up and killing the people I love. It gets really lonely sometimes, I lost my mom, Jarvis, even my dad in some weird pitying way, but I never had someone I could say that I would gladly live through anything for. So you've got to live for me alright? So I have someone to live for myself." Tony brushes his lips over Steve's knuckles softly and places his forehead lightly on the blonde's chest because it made him feel better to feel the rise and fall of Steve's lungs. "Listen, it's not like I can't live without you, because I can despite it being hard to do." Tony took a deep breath. "It's just that I really don't want to live in a world without you Angel, because no matter what you say or do, whenever I'm alone, I'd rather be with you." Tony sighed lightly, knowing that he wouldn't get a response from the unconscious soldier, but glad he could say that anyways. It was stupidly cheesy and totally stupid, besides, it sounded like some sort of song. Tony stood up, ready to leave the room, but stopped for a moment to lean over and brush the hair off of Steve's head, pressing a quick kiss to the bandages there before he could change his mind.