It wasn’t good. When Strange had held up that one finger, the look in his eyes haunted Tony, and Tony had known he was going to die. That was why Strange gave up the time stone, he needed Tony alive. All the time that he had spent with his family, looking for a way to get Peter back, getting him back, all of that for this moment. Tony came to peace in that moment. I’m going to die, but they all live. Pepper, Morgan, Harley, Peter. If they would all be okay, he could handle this. Peter was back, and Tony begged and pleaded for more time with the kid, but this was it. He wouldn’t get that time with him, and he had accepted that. This wasn’t what he wanted, but it was what had to happen. He knew it was. He grabbed the gauntlet after Thanos threw Danvers across the battlefield, the stones transferred to his own suit. He had been ready for this moment. Call that the moto of Tony’s life. I need to be ready for every moment. Thanos threw him backward, throwing Tony’s breath left him as he slammed into a slab of concrete. But he sat up, doing everything he could to ignore the burning sensation moving up his arm. For Peter. For Pepper. For Morgan.
“I am inevitable.” Thanos said, a wicked grin plastered across his face as he lifted his hand. He snapped, looking so pleased with himself. But Tony shook his head. God, Pep, tell them I love them. I’m sorry.
“And I- am- Ironma-” the force of someone tackling him threw Tony off. He hit the ground hard and his head pounded. He looked up in surprise to see a ghastly pale Peter Parker. Peter was straddled over his, the boy’s right hand webbing Tony to the concrete.
“I’m sorry.” Peter said, the boy’s eyes were wide as he gripped the gauntlet. Tony was about to fight him off, cut through the web, but one swift move of the boy’s unmatched strength had the gantlet no longer attached to his arm. Panic gripped every inch of Tony. This couldn’t be what Strange had planned. This couldn’t be what he had meant to happen.
“NO!” He cried as Peter slipped it on. Because if the kid died then who would Tony share the new suit designs with? Who would spend hours upon hours geeking out about a chemistry pun with him? Who made make movie references at the worst possible time? No. He wouldn’t let this happen. But, the kid was deathly quick.
He saw the boy kneeling, staring straight at Thanos.
For once in his life, no word’s left Peter Parker’s mouth. He didn’t make a movie reference or a smart-alek quip. He just looked so, so sad. But, with a grit of his teeth, and the resound of a hero-
He snapped his fingers.
White light passed over the world.
The view faded back in, and Thanos and his army were gone. But Tony didn’t care about that. Peter. Peter. Peter Peter Peter Peter. He saw Peter, the boy was losing every inch of energy he had left. He dropped down beside the boy who was slowly sinking to the ground. Tony wrapped his arms around the boys middle, ripping the gauntlet from the boy and throwing it as far from the two as he could. He retracted the nanobites, leaving him in his jeans and sweater.
Tony scooped the kid into his arms, crying out for Strange. Peter was looking around, eyes unfocused and tired. The boy had a bloody nose, and his entire left side of his body was completely burned. The Ironspider suit was charred on that entire side, and Tony wished that he could know that what was under the suit was in better condition, but he knew that wasn’t true. Tony sat with the kid leaned up against his chest, holding the boy tightly to him, as if a singular grasp from someone you loved could hold your soul to the planet.
“Hey, the tower- Strange, he’ll- we’ll get there.” Tony choked out as Peter’s gaze caught onto his own, doe brown eyes unfocused and terrified. “STRANGE!” Tony’s voice choked out. He could see the pain in the boy’s eyes, and he needed help! Because Peter was in too much pain, and this wasn’t right, it shouldn’t be Peter!
“I’m sorry, Stark.” Stephen spoke with the a resignated and grieving tone that Tony had ever heard come from his mouth. He shook his head, setting his jaw tightly as the nano-suit retracted and his fingers dug into the kid’s arm, one of his hands finding the boy’s hair as he stroked gently. But, Strange didn’t make any move towards them. He stood back, seemingly giving Tony space.
“No, don’t you dare. You come over here-“ He choked on his words, fighting off his tears as best he could. “You come over here and you fix this.” And he couldn’t stop them anymore, tears were falling freely from his face because no one was moving. They just watched, pity plastered on their faces, waiting for the kid- for his kid to die. He looked back down, the boy was just staring at his face, a grim smile on his lips. “Hey, Peter, come one. We have to make it to the tower.” The boy just continued to grin weakly, the pain plastered clearly on his face as he shook his head once.
“Tony- we can’t. It’s too late. It’s too late.” His voice was painfully gruff, like the infinity stones had shot out his vocal chords. But it was still Peter. His Peter. The man just shook his head, readjusting so that Peter was higher up on his chest. So that he was cradling the boy as close to his heart as he could. Because whenever Peter was scared he would close his eyes and listen to Tony’s heart, so he paused to let the boy listen to him.
“No-” He said in response to Peter’s weak voice.
“All your gadgets, Mr. Stark- can’t save my life.” The boy did his best at joking, but it just sounded like a pained resolution. Tony shook his head over and over, looking up and across the battlefield. All the solemn faces. All the devastated souls. The people he loved, who had heard story and story about how Tony loved this kid. Who had seen pictures, and saw the resolve Tony had about saving him, and they were all watching as the kid slowly faded away.
“I can’t- I’m not going to lose you.” Tony goes to stand up, to pull Peter up- to get someone on this damn battlefield to help me now! When a hand pats the one he has on his boy’s chest. Peter’s charred hand is laying over his, his finger’s shaking as he grips the man tightly.
“Just- just-” Peter takes a heaving breath, obviously struggling. “Just hold me. Please.” And Tony’s dam breaks again, he sobs, pressing his forehead to Peter’s as the boy just closes his eyes and leans into Tony’s touch. “There’s something I want to say-” He starts saying, but Tony shakes his head vigorously at this.
“Nope. You’re not going to say goodbye.” He said firmly, knowing that he would never accept a goodbye from Peter Parker.
“No, Tony… everything you’ve done. I know now. For me, for Spiderman. For the world. The person you made me into-” He stared past Tony, like he was no longer seeing the man, and Tony squeezed him tighter. He couldn’t- couldn’t do this. No, he couldn’t do this.
Peter’s breaths came out in a painful wheeze as he blinked slower.
“You could’ve done it without me.” He said, a pitiful grin on his lips as he laughed without humor.
Peter shrugs his shoulders, barely moving them. “Maybe. I want to say…” He swallows painfully. “Something I haven’t said to you enough.” He readjusts, jutting his jaw out, trying to clear the pain from his dimming eyes as he looks at Tony. “Thank you.” He whispers. There was so much meaning behind those two words, that Tony has to stop and think. Peter reaches up now, his hand gripping the back of Tony’s head, weakly. Fingers tangling into the man’s hair. Tony leans into it, relishing the affection. Deep down, knowing that he would never be able to sit on the couch with his boy again, watching their favorite movies before going down to the lab to spend hours together. And he felt like his heart was getting torn straight from his chest as he stared at the boy’s eyes.
Then Peter’s hand drops.
And Tony loses his mind.
Lifeless eyes.
His eyes should never be lifeless.
His Peter. His boy. His eyes should never be anything other than bright and awake, and excited for the day. They should never be staring at the sky, unmoving and laking everything that is Peter Benjamin Parker.
“Peter… No!” He shakes the boy now, getting onto his knees and gripping the limp boy closer to him. He couldn’t accept this, couldn’t handle this. “Stay with me!” He checks the boy’s pule, and its so weak, so slow. “Peter! Peter! Come on!” His eyes blink for a second, he makes eye contact with Tony, like a final apology. A final I love you. A final see you necxt week, Mr. Stark! And his eyes go still. And he cries, pulling the limp boy up and closer to him. “Peter!” His voice was raw and sore as he yelled to the sky. He had done this all for this kid, he couldn’t lose him now! It was too cruel, to just get him back only to lose him all over again.
“Strange p-please!” He sobs, every inch of him shattering as Tony shook with the sobs. “I need one last favor, please.” He can’t even look at the man, only able to look at the limp face of Peter Parker. NO.
“Tony,” Strange knelt down, reaching over to close the boy’s lifeless eyes. “There is nothing you can do.” He says gently. And he knows. He knows that was it. He knows that he won’t get his boy back, and he won’t ever be the same.
“I’ve failed?” He asks, his forehead resting on Peter’s shoulder. Peter’s still shoulder.
“No, his time has just… come to pass.” And Tony feels a well of anger. Because this isn’t fair! This can’t happen to Peter Parker! He was perfect. Kind, loving, caring, selfless, encouraging, and everything that Tony could never be. He had too much to learn from Peter from him to just be… gone.
“I can’t lose him!” He says wildly, looking up at Strange with desperation seeping out of him. “He’s my kid!” He yells, because they need to know that he can’t do this again.
“No man, no matter how great can know his destiny. Some lives have been foretold, Stark. Peter was not just a great kid, he was exactly what we needed. The things he did for this earth… he will never be forgotten. The story he has been a part of will live long in the minds of men.”
So he stayed like that. Bent over Peter Parker. The boy that sacrificed everything to save them all. Tony couldn’t handle it. Wouldn’t handle it. But he would make sure the whole world knew his kid’s name.