Bucky Barnes slowly put away his trombone. If he moved really slowly, maybe he’d be the last one out of the band room. Later than Nat. Later than Tony. Later than the football team. He could call his mom and say he couldn’t get a ride home, he had to stay late, he just got caught up, it wasn’t his fault.
“Hey Bucky, you need a ride tonight?” asked Tony.
“Nah, I’m good. Pretty wiped, so I’m going to be a minute. Don’t let me keep you.”
“Suit yourself.”
Bucky sat alone for a while, waiting as long as he could to get changed and fold up his marching band uniform. Once he pulled his sweater on and started to leave, he called his mom.
“Hey, Bucky. Couldn’t get a ride home tonight?” she asked.
“No,” said Bucky, “sorry.”
“James Buchanan Barnes, don’t you dare apologize. I’ll be there soon, okay? You just sit tight.”
Bucky sat tight. He’d escaped again. As long as he caught a ride with Tony every once in a while, he could totally keep pulling it off. He climbed into his mom’s car, clutching to his trombone like a lifeline.
“You could always try to get a ride home with Steve. Isn’t he on the football team?”
“We haven’t really hung out in...awhile. I don’t feel comfortable asking that of him. I’m sorry.”
Bucky’s mom sighed. He knew she hated it when he apologized, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself from doing it.
“Oh, sweetie, that’s okay. How was the game?”
“We won.”
Bucky didn’t tell his mother that they always won, and that just like always, tiny Tony still looked a bit silly playing the tuba, unflappable Nat still had a command over the football field and the saxophone that Bucky couldn’t help but be jealous of, and cute Steve still had a smile that could melt Bucky on the spot.
“That’s great,” said Bucky’s mom, “get some sleep tonight.”
Bucky will try to sleep. It’s the least he owes his mother.
#
Bucky Barnes was always the last to leave after a football game, not that Steve had been watching. He just happened to notice Bucky. Steve noticed what Bucky did, what he said, who he hung out with, how he was doing with band, the stern but earnest look in his steel blue eyes, barely concealed by his prescription glasses, capable of sending Steve to heaven and hell, all in a single instance.
Normal friend stuff.
Steve tried really hard not to think about it and drove home, but he was still thinking about it, thinking about Bucky. Steve couldn’t put his finger on what happened between the two of them. They were inseparable their whole lives, then they started high school and all of a sudden Bucky was busy all the time.
Bucky was still there for the big stuff. Bucky was there on Steve’s birthday and for his surgery. Steve was there for Bucky, too. He went to George’s funeral and he helped Becca with her homework every now and then.
But he still missed Bucky. God, did he miss Bucky. Something changed and Steve assumed that it was Bucky’s dad passing away and that one day Bucky would be his best friend again. Steve wanted more than that, but he was willing to take things one day at a time. He was content just knowing that Bucky was okay.
Steve made up his mind. Next time, he would offer Bucky a ride home. He wouldn’t force anything, just let Bucky know he was there. He would let Bucky know he was there, that they were still friends. Steve would tell Bucky in no uncertain terms that Steve would always be there for him and do whatever it took to make him happy.
But like, in a friend way.
Steve didn’t tell anyone how he’d been feeling. His mom didn’t ask him. She just kissed him on the top of the head and tweaked his nose. Steve thought of every self-affirming thing anyone had ever told him, trying to stay brave, just so he could try to be friends with Bucky.
“What’s on your mind, Rogers?”
“None of your business, Romanov.”
Many a great plan had not survived contact with Natasha Romanov, and Steve’s plan wasn’t even that great. Natasha sat across the lunch table from Steve, cool and collected. She raised an eyebrow at him.
“Alright fine,” said Steve, “I’m gonna try to get closer to Bucky again, see if we can be friends again, then maybe I can work up the nerve to ask him out or something.”
“Oh yeah, weren’t you guys like BFFs? I mean, before you met me,” said Natasha.
“We grew up together. I just...don’t know how to start again with him.”
“Well, luckily for you, you have me.”
“Nat, don’t.”
“Oh, I’m gonna,” laughed Nat.
“I’m a dead man.”
#
“Hey Bucky. Hey Tony. Come sit with me and Steve.”
Natasha walked away, no room for argument. Tony raised an eyebrow at Bucky.
“Since when does she talk to us outside of band practice?” asked Tony.
“Come on, it’s not like she does it on purpose. I’m shy and you’re the only one crazy enough to be friends with me.”
Tony stood up and grabbed his lunch.
“Yeah, but word around town is you and Rogers were thick as thieves for awhile.”
Bucky fiddled with his glasses as he followed Tony.
“What do you know about me ‘n Steve?”
“Peggy Carter’s my godsister.”
“I’m a dead man.”
Bucky sat down, doing his level best not to make eye contact with Steve. His efforts did not escape Tony’s notice, so he suspected he’d be having an awkward conversation later.
“Hey Buck,” said Steve.
Bucky’s resolve snapped, and he looked at Steve. Bucky had to get a hold of himself. Steve wasn’t just a guy with kind eyes, a charming smile, and enough grit to power a city. He was the guy who showed up to Bucky’s dad’s funeral, and helped Bucky’s sister with her homework, and listened to Bucky, even if all Bucky was worried about was band practice or a test or the weather.
Bucky regretted letting their friendship fall to the wayside just because he had the unfortunate realization that he had a crush on Steve. He had to be stronger, he had to pull through. And if he had Steve back, he was sure he could.
“How’s your mom doing?” asked Bucky.
“Good. She asked me about you, actually. How’re Winnie and Becca?”
“They’re good. Becca hates middle school.”
“Who doesn’t,” laughed Tony.
“Bucky didn’t,” said Steve, “Mrs. Jarvis had a soft spot for us, so she let us eat lunch in the library.”
“It was the easiest way to stop you from getting into a fight,” said Bucky.
“Then we met Peggy, who encouraged me.”
“Enabled, Steve, the word you’re looking for is enabled.”
“If you guys were friends with Peggy and Mrs. Jarvis, how come I didn’t meet you until high school?” asked Tony.
“Maybe they just weren’t ready for you, Stark,” chuckled Natasha.
Tony rolled his eyes.
“We were pretty isolationist back then,” said Steve, “Bucky used to post up in a tree with a water gun.”
Bucky enjoyed the walk down memory lane, but he was absolutely dreading talking to Tony about it. Bucky knew his soft gay eyes had been out in full force. As expected, Tony pulled Bucky aside after lunch.
“What the hell is going on with you and Steve?”
“I’ve been into him since forever, I’m just trying to be his friend again.”
“Um duh, I knew that. I’m talking about Steve. I mean, people would kill to be looked at the way Steve looks at you. I think he’s into you.”
“You get me some empirical evidence, and I’ll do something about it.”
“Dude. You are so gonna regret saying that.”
Tony had Bucky convinced by the end of the day.
#
Steve was content. He had Bucky back in his life, as a friend and occasional carpool partner. The shit happened to hit the fan on Halloween. Steve drove Bucky home after the football game.
Bucky had his glasses tucked into his sweater. His cheeks were still tinged pink from the autumn breeze.
“Thanks for the ride, Stevie.”
“No problem, Buck.”
“I forgot you gave my nickname a nickname. Dork.”
“Whatever. You liked it.”
Bucky reached overand kissed Steve. It was cold and quick and perfect. Steve found himself completely at a loss for everything except panic, which he had in spades. Bucky pulled away and shrugged his shoulders forward.
“But-wha-huh-you-I never-I mean I’ve never-I mean-”
“It’s fine, Steve. No big deal. Just something we did. I’m sorry.”
Bucky left the car and went into his house. Steve was sure he’d fucked up somehow, and he was going to fix it or die trying. It took Steve a lot longer than he’d thought. One month, two weeks, and three days, to be exact.
Not that Steve was counting. Not that he even remembered what had happened one month, two weeks, and three days ago. Nope. Not at all. He was completely and totally focused on the leftover mac and cheese he had brought for lunch and whatever the hell Natasha was talking about.
“-but he was only paralyzed for like, a week, and are you even listening to me?”
Steve glanced back toward Natasha.
“Sorry, Nat.”
Natasha narrowed her eyes at Steve.
“What’s going on with you? Because you’ve been acting weird since Halloween. I know Barnes caught a ride home with you and your mom after the game, but I know you didn’t flip out. You’re not chill, but you’re also not Tony.”
“Really? ‘Not Tony’ is as much as I’m gonna get in the chill category?” asked Steve.
Natasha rolled her eyes.
“I know you didn’t tell him that you’re into him, because you’re not acting that type of weird. Did something happen with Barnes, or am I totally off?”
“He kissed me,” Steve whispered harshly.
“Did you kiss him back?”
“FUCK!”
#
“James. Bucky. Buchanan. Barnes. My dude.”
“Tony, I will stuff you in a tuba,” retorted Bucky.
Apparently not talking to Steve for one month, two weeks, and three days made Bucky very cranky. Not that any of Bucky’s friends knew that that was why Bucky was cranky. He really thought he had a chance with Steve, but clearly he didn’t know him that well.
At least, not anymore, thought Bucky.
“Sorry, Mr. Grumpypants. Would this have anything to do with you not hanging out with Steve as much?”
Bucky began disassembling his trombone and putting it back in its case. The quickest way to get rid of Tony’s questions was to answer them.
“I kissed him, he freaked out, he wasn’t interested. Not a big deal.”
It was absolutely a big deal.
“Wow. I’m sorry man. That’s so weird, I really thought he was into you.”
So did Bucky.
“Thanks, Tony.”
The door to the band room swung open. Bucky snapped his attention to the door. Steve was standing there.
“Uh...hey Rogers,” said Tony.
“Tony. I didn’t mean to...make a scene.”
“Yes you did,” said Tony and Bucky.
“Okay, yeah, I did,” said Steve, “Bucky, could we talk?”
“We’re talking right now, Steve.”
“Buck, c’mon.”
“Leave him alone,” said Tony, “message received and all that. Just buzz off.”
“It’s fine, Tony,” said Bucky, “I’ll meet you outside?”
Tony nodded. He made an “I’m watching you” signal at Steve before exiting the room.
“I...uh…” stammered Steve, “that was my first kiss.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I thought you were into me since we’d started hanging out again, but you probably just wanted to catch up, because you missed me, but like, platonically, I’m not that good at reading people, apparently. So, I guess, I shouldn’t have done that?”
Bucky had a realization. The realization was that he was crying, which was embarrassing as all hell. Steve approached him quickly. Steve took Bucky’s glasses off of his face and tucked them into the collar of his sweater. Steve reached into the pocket of his jean jacket and removed a handkerchief. He wiped away Bucky’s tears.
Steve leaned in and kissed Bucky. Bucky felt Steve’s hand and the cloth of the handkerchief on the sides of his face. He wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist. Steve pulled away, and slowly lowered his hands. He took Bucky’s glasses back and cleaned them with the handkerchief before gingerly putting them back on Bucky’s face.
“That was nice, say hi to your mom and Becca from me, I really like you, I’ll text you when I get home, gotta go bye!”
Steve pecked Bucky on the mouth before turning around and running out of the room. Bucky chuckled.
“Dork.”