Peter VI
“I can’t believe you’re starting your senior year with stitches in your head.” May fussed with the collar of Peter’s shirt and tried to fix his hair with a licked fingertip.
“Gross, May,” Peter said and ducked away. “I’m not 5. It’s fashionably... a mess.” May rolled her eyes at him.
“Just let me baby you a little,” she said, kissing his cheek and pulling him into a hug. She was warm, and Peter sighed contentedly. “You’re sure this is what you want?” May asked. Peter pulled away and looked her in the eyes.
“Yes, I’m sure,” he said, and it was the truth. He wanted to finish school even though Pepper offered to arrange literally anything to keep him from having to go back. But Peter wanted to go back; he missed Midtown. He was a ball of nerves, but he could do this. He wanted to do this.
“It’s okay that you’re nervous,” May said. Peter rolled his eyes.
“It’s just first day anticipation,” he said. It wasn’t just that, but he didn’t want to worry May too much. She already tip-toed around him like he was going to crack into a hundred pieces. But he’d been feeling a little bit better lately. Matt was teaching him to meditate, and it was helping a lot.
yo bb boy eat a good breakfast n dont be late!
And Wade was back! Peter felt relieved to know he was in town, even though he hadn’t seen him yet. Ellie had a trial month with her mom that seemed to go okay? But Wade wanted to spend time with her and make sure everything was settled before school started.
Peter had stopped by the office a couple times to check in with Foggy, and Ellie had seemed pretty chill about staying with her mom while Wade was gone. Peter felt like he was in a weird spot with them. Ellie was close to his age, and Wade definitely mother-henned him, but Spider-Man and Deadpool were... not exactly peers, but would need to have something akin to a professional relationship. Wade pinky promised to Peter before he left that that he was getting paid for “stuff retrieval” and didn’t plan on killing anyone, but when had Deadpool been much of a planner?
“He’s trying,” Foggy had told Peter the last time he was at the office. “He’s been trying, since he got Ellie. You don’t exactly operate inside of the bounds of the law either.” Foggy raised an eyebrow. Okay, checkmate.
But today was the first day of school, and Peter was determined not to let his mind wander and get caught up in non-school details.
ty n yes I eat breakfast. my metabolism is stupid high. hope Ellie has a good day too xx
Peter received a reply of eight hearts and eight legs. He rolled his eyes, but his heart felt mushy. Peter was still unhappy that Wade had called him out on what Peter reluctantly admitted were daddy issues, but it didn’t stop him from feeling that way toward Wade.
“Hey?” questioned MJ from next to him. Peter looked down at their joined hands. He looked up at her amused face. “Welcome back to reality, Mr. Parker.”
Peter ran his hand through his hair. “Oh, uh, happy first day of school?” he tried. MJ rolled her eyes.
“How long have I been here? Best guess, c’mon.” Peter pursed his lips and shook his head. No idea. He had no idea. “Ten minutes, Parker, ten minutes. What if I had been a radioactive spider? What then?” She held up the hand holding his for emphasis.
“That is - you know that I would rather be touching you than not. It’s second nature. It feels more normal than my own skin!” He cut off the protest he knew was coming with a kiss. MJ slid a hand into his back pocket and pinched him.
“You’ve gotten awfully sentimental lately,” she said. Peter felt cold wash over his heart. He was clingy, and she wasn’t going to put up with his issues forever. MJ must’ve seen the panic on his face because she frowned. She pulled Peter toward her with the hand still in his pocket.
“I’m just teasing, please calm down,” she soothed. “I could never leave someone who looks like that naked.” Peter snickered. MJ met his eyes and stroked her fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry, you’re on edge. I’ll try to limit my default personality to Ned.”
MJ did not, in fact, limit her withering remarks to Ned, but her being normal made Peter feel normal. For the most part, everyone else was normal too. A few classmates commented on his eventful summer, but they were satisfied with Peter’s short response that, “Yeah, it was pretty crazy for a while.”
“Welcome back, Parker!” Flash said, elbowing Peter into a locker door and literally knocking him out of his thoughts. Peter had avoided him all day, but didn’t manage to dodge him before his last class. Awesome, this had returned to normal as well.
“Can’t believe the Bugle framed this loser as Spider-Man,” one of Flash’s friends said. Maybe it was all the Daredevil training, but Peter felt Flash’s heart speed up. Flash didn’t so much glance at Peter though.
“Fucking stupid for sure,” said Flash derisively. He shoved Peter up against the locker. “Meet me out back after school, dick.” Flash was facing Peter, his expression not visible to the people behind him. He raised his eyebrows and mouthed, “Yeah?” It was not aggressive, at all. Peter was confused but kept up the act and shoved him off. Flash flipped Peter off and disappeared around the corner.
“Flash was being weird,” Peter whispered to Ned while they were supposed to be inventorying their lab equipment.
“He’s just an asshole, Peter,” Ned answered. He was only half paying attention to Peter as he surreptitiously texted Betty under the table.
“I thought you guys were over,” Peter said, glancing at Ned’s screen. Too many kissy emojis. Peter rolled his eyes.
“Hey!” exclaimed Ned, turning his screen away from Peter. “So we had some time apart, and I think we’re both ready to try this again.” Peter sighed. MJ would’ve been so much more helpful with this Flash thing, but she was at yearbook on the other side of the building and kept her phone off. He couldn’t think of a way to sneak over and get her attention before meeting up with Flash.
“Hey, can you tell MJ I’ll find her later?” Peter asked a couple minutes before class ended. “I have a...thing.” Ned looked excited for a second before Peter added, “No, not that kind of thing.” He wiggled his fingers like the itsy bitsy spider. “Just a school thing.”
“Sure, yeah, I’ll let her know,” said Ned. “Text if it becomes a - thing.” Peter nodded. Guy in the chair, always ready. He reluctantly headed out to find Flash.
Who was smoking, actual cigarettes and not even vaping. It made Peter’s nose itchy. He must have made a face because Flash snorted and dropped the cigarette, stubbing it out with his expensive sneakers.
“You’re just gonna leave that there?” Peter asked. Flash rolled his eyes and made a show of picking up the butt and carrying it over to a trash can a couple yards away. When he walked back over to Peter, he stood close and his eyes roamed over Peter’s face. Flash shook his head in disbelief.
“I can’t believe I didn’t realize it before,” he said. Peter’s heart skipped a beat. Logically, he knew that not everyone would believe the cover story about Spider-Man, but it was nauseating to experience it, and even worse that it was Flash.
“Um...” Peter started and suddenly felt too light-headed to finish. Flash actually looked sympathetic, and it took away any remaining conscious thought that Peter had.
“Are you freaking out?” he asked. “Please don’t do that. I am not equipped to handle other people’s emotions.” Flash held up his hands defensively. Peter forced himself to take a breath. This was fine. It was just Flash, who had peeled raw strips off Peter’s self esteem for years. But - high school problems. This was just a high school problem, Peter told himself frantically.
“No, it’s fine,” Peter said. Flash looked skeptical. “Really. I’m not - whatever you think.”
“You’re definitely that,” Flash said. “But I’m here because I owe you an apology.” Right, now that he knew Peter was Spider-Man. Peter crossed his arms and frowned.
“I don’t need anything from you, Flash,” he said. Flash held up a finger. He was unphased.
“But you might!” he said confidently. “One minute to hear me out?” Peter nodded. What could it hurt?
“I guess almost dying a second time stuck because I regretted being a dick to you,” said Flash. He sounded genuine as he picked at a stray thread on his sleeve. “Not just you, but let’s be honest, it was mostly you, owing to you being -“ he gestured at Peter. “Relatively passive, and smarter than me.” He narrowed his eyes at Peter, who gave a skeptical half smile. “So, I’m sorry.” Flash bit his bottom lip nervously.
“Apology accepted, I guess,” said Peter, and Flash looked visibly relieved. “But what’s with the bitchy Instagram?” The old Flash was immediately back, and he looked at Peter like he was the dumbest ass.
“Hello, I am upholding your secret identity!” Flash shook his head in disbelief. “Peter, really. How is this is any way different from Pepper Potts’ press conference?” Peter was taken aback. This was more self-reflection than he thought Flash was capable of. It was strangely overwhelming. Peter sat down hard on the sidewalk.
“I just need thirty seconds,” he said to his knees, his arms squeezed around his legs. He felt Flash sit down across from him and looked up. The sympathetic look was back. It was out of place on Flash.
“You disappeared, HE disappeared, after the Bugle outed - him,” Flash explained. “It made sense, with everything that had happened around school, you know, but my average follower was easy enough to convince that Spider-Man wasn’t a teenager.” Flash shrugged. “If it turned out you wanted to own it, I didn’t do any harm by calling you Penis Parker a couple times.”
“Wow, thanks,” said Peter, but smiled at Flash anyway. Flash shrugged and looked away after a second. He took a breath and looked apprehensive again.
“That was the Parker apology,” Flash said quietly. “It was coming no matter what, but it’s not really enough. I - I was an asshole to bring up the Stark Internship after... yeah.”
Peter swallowed and stared at an ant on the sidewalk. Did half the ants disappear, too? He used to think about who was dusted and who wasn’t all the time, but the compulsion had faded, mostly. He let the ant crawl onto his finger and dropped it in the grass.
“You didn’t know,” he said finally, looking up at Flash.
“It doesn’t matter that I didn’t know,” Flash snapped, meeting Peter’s eyes. “I’m sorry because I was awful, and I wish I hadn’t made it worse for you, but I’m sure that I did. And if it means anything to you, I really am sorry.” Peter’s eyelids burned and his throat was tight. Not in front of Flash, please hold it together, he told himself.
“I saw him die,” is what came out in a hushed whisper. Peter buried his face in his knees again and breathed shallowly.
“I’m... I’m so sorry, man,” said Flash softly. “Not even your dorky ass deserved that.” Peter choked out a laugh. He looked up at Flash and wiped his eyes.
“Oh my god, you are such an ass,” Peter said, and Flash grinned.
“Yes, but it worked!” he said, tapping the side of his forehead. “You’re tech smart, but I can people.” Flash stood up and offered Peter his hand. “As though there’s any universe in which you need help up.”
“It’s still nice to offer,” Peter said, “which is obviously why you did it. So thank you, and I’m sorry I freaked out.” Flash waved him off.
“I can appreciate that you’ve been through shit,” he said, and reasonable human Flash was honestly still a little disconcerting to Peter. “I’ll keep the Penis Parker shit to a minimum, but I feel like it’s best if I dial it back slowly?” Peter nodded reluctantly. He was right, but it still kind of sucked even of Flash didn’t really mean it. “And I’ll let you know if any, um, super stuff comes up in the influencer community.”
Peter crossed his arms. “The influencer community, are you even a real person?” he asked skeptically. Flash threw a hand across his chest, mock offended.
“I’ll have you know, Parker, that I have my finger on the pulse of Queens and the superhero fan community in general.” Flash made a show of dusting off his jacket sleeve before turning and walking toward the parking lot. “Later, Parker!”
Later, in the comfort of his own bedroom, Peter described this encounter with Flash as surreal and confusing. Ned was giving MJ a look from his spot on the floor. MJ was behind Peter on the bed, wrapped around him with her hands pressed against his middle. She managed to avoid Peter’s arms, which were animatedly flailing as he told the story. He imagined that MJ was mirroring Ned’s look.
“You freaked out, didn’t you?” MJ said, close enough that her breath tickled his ear. At his non-answer, Ned’s face fell.
“Peter, you have to be more careful,” he admonished. “It’s Flash! Who cares if he’s sorry? He’s sorry now, but what about later? Peter.” Ned’s shoulders sagged, and he had that worried look that Peter had grown to dread.
“You’re kind of a dipshit sometimes,” MJ said. Peter closed his eyes. They were right, and he felt awful. His chest was tight and he curled in on himself. He attempted to pull away from MJ, but she tightened her hold around his stomach and hummed a “no” at him. He felt the vibrations down his spine. That usually comforted him, but now it grated.
“Please let me go,” Peter whispered. MJ released her grip and Peter collapsed onto his comforter, balling his fists up in the fabric. He focused on his breath, hot and suffocating with his face pressed into the comforter.
“Michelle.”
“I didn’t -”
“You have to be more careful with him!”
“This is just who I am!”
Then silence. MJ leaned back against the wall, her legs just touching Peter’s bare feet. Her breaths were too quick. Ned stayed still on the floor, occasionally sniffling.
“Please don’t talk about me like I’m not here,” Peter whispered hoarsely. He sat up and wiped his eyes for the hundredth time that week. “So how do I fix this?”
Ned and MJ shared a look.
“Peter, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Ned said gently. Anger flared in Peter’s chest.
“Stop treating me like I’m fragile!” he exclaimed. He ran a hand through his hair, agitated. He was not unstable, he was not losing it, and even if he was, he was responsible for his own shit. MJ tentatively reached out and laid a hand on his thigh with a gentle squeeze. Peter met her worried eyes and promptly burst into tears. “Today was really hard,” he sobbed through his hands. He shook off MJ’s attempt to hug him and Ned’s reassuring words. “I just need - just a few minutes alone. Please.”
Ned started to protest, but MJ hopped off the bed and grabbed his arm, pulling him out of the room with her. Peter tried not to dwell on the inevitable conversation he would be having with May after she dragged what happened out of Ned. MJ was a wall, but Ned was helpless against May. Their voices faded as they moved away from his room, but if Peter focused, he could still make out their conversation. For his continuing mental health, he shut them out. Matt had trouble doing that because, he said, it was like trying to ignore a conversation happening right next to you. Peter didn’t envy his heightened senses. He was miserable enough as it was.
After a while, Ned slowly opened Peter’s door and looked questioningly as Peter.
“It’s fine, cmon.” Ned returned to his spot on the floor and MJ followed. She looked smug. “What?” asked Peter.
“I had a chat with Flash,” MJ said. “You will have no problems with him.” Peter made a noncommittal noise, and MJ narrowed her eyes at him.
“He was nice, for once,” Peter said helplessly. “I can’t have nice things?”
“Ouch, Parker,” MJ said. She scooted off the bed to join Ned on the floor. Ned was already in placating mode.
“No, no, it wasn’t like that,” he said, to both of them. “His motives are pure. He’s extra terrified of MJ now, but that’s just a bonus, right?”
“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine,” said Peter, running a hand through his hair. “I’m gonna...” he trailed off and gestured toward the window.
“Right right, Spider-Man stuff, we get it,” said Ned, giving him a thumbs up. MJ stared at Peter with crossed arms, picking him apart with her gaze.
“Gotta go hit something,” she said eventually. “I get it.” Ned raised his eyebrows. Peter shrugged. She wasn’t exactly wrong. He just needed out, for a little while. He felt caged.
“Just be careful,” Ned added, ever the mother hen.
And Peter was careful, at least until that weekend. The first week of school had gone better than he’d expected, honestly. Flash mostly stayed out of his way, MJ ran AcaDec with an iron fist, which was comfortingly predictable, and the Spider-Man speculation whispers were minimal. But Peter was drained and on edge, simultaneously. Matt noticed immediately.
“Tough week at school?” he asked, as Peter put his fist through a punching bag. Peter frowned at his sawdusty hand and the hole in the bag.
“Um, sorry,” he said. Matt looked sympathetic, and Peter rolled his eyes. “I don’t need your - whatever. It was fine. I just feel...”
“On edge?” Matt suggested.
“Yes!” Peter punched a second hole in the bag. It was already beyond fixing. “Fight me?”
“Nope.”
“Come onnnn, Matt,” Peter whined. He hit the bag again and it broke apart, spilling musty smelling sawdust all over the floor. Matt wrinkled his nose.
“Didn’t really think that through,” Peter said to the mess at his feet. Matt laughed but stopped abruptly, swiveling his head toward the door. Eight seconds later, it was thrown open, clanging loudly against the wall.
“The party’s here!” Wade called loudly. Peter sprinted across the gym and catapulted himself at Wade, wrapping him in an enthusiastic hug.
“I missed you!” he said. Wade returned Peter’s hug with a squeeze.
“Aww, I missed you, baby boy!” Wade said. “Sorry I couldn’t get away sooner. You teenagers are all the same with your endless drama,” he teased. Peter pouted, and Wade tapped him affectionately on the head.
“Red,” he greeted Matt, who hadn’t moved from the other side of the room.
“Wade,” he said flatly. Wade rolled his eyes.
“You invited me here, dour devil, so maybe cut the attitude,” Wade said, but he didn’t sound nearly as irritated as Matt looked.
“The kid asked,” Matt said and disappeared into the back of the gym without another word.
“You guys are way bitchier without Foggy around,” Peter said before his brain caught up to his mouth. Wade barked a laugh.
“Matt’s awful prickly about killing for a guy whose MO is grievous bodily harm,” Wade said, poking Peter in the chest with a knowing glance.
“But you don’t really...?” Peter trailed off, biting his lip nervously. Wade shook his head.
“You know I stopped taking hit jobs, Spidey,” Wade said. “Not since Ellie. But I’m not gonna go out of my way to save an asshole.” But you would, remains unsaid. Peter could live with that.
Peter glanced over to where Matt had been. He was still out of sight, somewhere in the back of the gym. Peter turned back to Wade and shoved him playfully. “Fight me!”
“Peter,” Wade said in that parental “no” tone that he heard from May all the time.
“Please?” said Peter hopefully. “I literally can’t hurt you, and you can’t accidentally hurt me.” Lie.
“Why aren’t you sparring with Matt?” Wade asked, narrowing his eyes. Uh, shit. Peter covered as best as he could because if Wade knew Matt broke his nose, he would not be okay with any of this.
“Just Matt being Matt,” Peter said, trying to sound flippant. Wade stared him down for an entire minute before sighing in defeat.
“Fine, fine, go get in the ring,” he said, already pulling off his hoodie. Peter dived under the bottom rope and tumbled from the floor to land balanced on the opposite rope. “Goddamn show-off,” grumbled Wade, making no attempt to hide a smile.
“Alright kid, ground rules,” said Wade.
“Uuuhhgg whyyyy?” Peter whined. Wade ignored him.
“Don’t kill me,” he said. “I’m told it’s traumatic for the people around me, and you have buckets of that already, kiddo.” Peter rolled his eyes.
“Like I was planning on killing you,” he said.
“If I thought it would be an effective teaching strategy, it would absolutely be an option,” Wade said, and promptly grabbed Peter’s ankle and had him pinned to the floor in two seconds. Peter blinked in surprise. He was such an idiot. Wade fell backward onto the mat and howled with laughter.
“Surprised pikachu!” he wheezed. “Oh my god, I might die anyway from the look on your face.” Peter sat up and glared at Wade.
“Baby boy,” Wade admonished, still flat on his back and wiping tears from his eyes. “I know you’re all into compartmentalization, or whatever,” he waved his hand flippantly. “But you’re still fighting Deadpool.” Wade had a dangerous glint in his eye. “The talking is half the fight.”
But this time, Peter was ready. Wade grabbed for him, but Peter was already back on the top rope, crouched and ready to spring. Wade nodded approvingly.
“So that’s pretty much it for your rules,” Wade said. “I mean, I can come up with more since your brain is seventy percent formed, at best. Don’t do drugs! Do drugs even do anything to -“ Wade was interrupted by Peter leaping onto his back and pulling him backward onto the mat. Wade grabbed his wrist, but Peter scrambled out of his grasp and ended up on top, pinning him.
“Aww, good job Spidey,” Wade said, extricating a hand and pinching his cheek. Peter scrunched his nose up.
“I should’ve kept your arm pinned,” he said. Wade snorted. By this time, Matt had wandered back over to them and was watching silently from just outside the ring. Peter glanced at him, and Matt gave him the tiniest nod. Wade continued to ignore Matt and took the opportunity to sweep Peter’s leg and knock him on his ass.
“Ouch,” he said petulantly. Wade continued monologueing.
“Sixty-five percent of your brain, maybe. So don’t do drugs, spider metabolism aside. Stay in school! I know you’re a smarty pants but don’t get distracted or knock up that scary girlfriend of yours.”
“Oh my god, Wade!” Peter said, turning pink. “We - no, I am not even dignifying that with an answer.” He flipped Wade onto his back with one arm and was back on the ropes in seconds. Wade gave him a thumbs up from the ground. Peter hopped down and offered him a hand.
“Nice work, kiddo,” he said as Peter pulled him up. “Back’s never gonna recover though.” Wade stretched and his spine cracked loudly.
“That’s just cuz you’re an old man,” said Peter, dodging the noogie he saw coming from miles away. He glanced at Matt again, who was still watching silently. He looked back at Wade.
“Hit me,” Peter said, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He was a ball of pent-up energy. Wade raised his eyebrows.
“Uh, no,” he said. “That’s against MY rules.”
“Just once?” asked Peter. “It’s for science!” Wade looked over at Matt, who made no attempt to communicate with either of them.
“Science?” questioned Wade, and Peter started talking.
“So you know how my spidey sense like, doesn’t work on you? Or people that aren’t like, trying to kill me or whatever? Based on some, uh, stuff that I’ve picked up, I think my spidey sense is tied to healing, kind of? Like if my spidey sense doesn’t go off around a person and they accidentally hurt me during sparring or whatever, it doesn’t heal as fast. But I need more data, you know, so if YOU hit me and it still hurts in 45 minutes, that’s pretty good confirmation...” Peter trailed off at the murderous look on Wade’s face.
Peter’s spidey sense screamed too late as Wade darted out of the ring and punched Matt in the nose with a loud crack. Nausea hit Peter with no warning, and he sank to his knees.
“You are supposed to be the ADULT here, MATTHEW!” Wade was on a tear. Matt had produced a towel from somewhere and was holding it against his face. His nose was definitely broken. “If I ask you how he knows that, am I going to fucking murder your fucked up ass?”
“It’s likely,” Matt answered slowly. Wade screamed in frustration and stomped to the back of the gym, frantically texting on the phone he’d just pulled from his cargo pants. Seconds later, a tinny version of “Jolene” echoed through the gym. Wade listened for a few seconds before he spoke.
“I don’t care. Come get him or I’m gonna toss him off the fucking roof.” Peter looked at Matt, who was standing rigidly still but clearly listening to the other side of the conversation as well. Peter tried to concentrate, but Wade was too far away, and he was honestly too rattled to focus. “What the fuck ever. Ten minutes!”
It was a long ten minutes. No one spoke, or even moved. Wade was leaned against the far wall, muttering to himself animatedly. Peter could barely look at him. Guilt was tearing him up inside, but he felt like he was missing a puzzle piece with Wade. Even if Wade had hurt him, it would’ve healed, just slower. It would have been fine.
Finally, the door creaked open and a scattered looking blonde woman entered. She rushed over to Matt and fussed over his face. “Karen, it’s fine,” he said, brushing off her concern. She pursed her lips disapprovingly and walked over to Wade. They spoke in hushed whispers that Peter couldn’t hear until the end.
“You got the kid?” she asked, looking over at Peter, still hunched over in the ring.
“Yeah, I got him,” Wade said, eyes on Peter for the first time since he went at Matt. He watched as Karen, who Peter vaguely knew as a former colleague of Matt and Foggy, approached the ring. She leaned her arms on the mat and watched Peter for a few seconds.
“You okay?” Karen asked. She had a kind voice.
“Yeah,” Peter answered. He swallowed to wet his dry throat. Karen looked skeptical. “Really, this isn’t the first time I’ve been yelled at for fucking up.” Peter could feel Wade’s attention laser focused on him. It made him nervous.
“I’m going to take Matt and go then, yeah?” she said. “Give me your phone.” He unlocked it and she put herself in his contacts. “Just in case,” she said, giving him a small smile. She was so pretty and sweet, and for the life of him, Peter couldn’t figure out how she ended up hanging around with Daredevil. But Matt did what she said and followed her obediently.
Wade took his time coming over to Peter and eventually stood over him, arms crossed and anger radiating from him. Peter felt awful, his spidey sense silent but nerves gnawing at his stomach.
“Get up.” Peter stood up and stared at the floor. Wade tipped Peter’s chin up to look at him. “That was fucking stupid,” he said. Peter’s lip quivered and he tried to hide his face, but Wade held him firm.
“I’m sorry,” Peter whispered. Wade let him go but Peter withered under his gaze anyway. He wrapped an arm protectively around himself, as though that would help with the anxiety tearing up stomach.
“Why?”
“Wh - what?”
“Why are you sorry?” Peter stared blankly at Wade. Wade waited, all crossed arms and angry dad energy, for Peter’s brain to catch up.
“I kind of lied,” Peter answered.
“Oh, you kind of lied?” parroted Wade. He sounded so pissed. Peter dropped his eyes to the ground on instinct.
“It was shitty,” Peter whispered. “I knew you wouldn’t even spar if you knew, and I got - I got caught up in it and my - scientific curiosity, or whatever - I just.” Peter sighed deeply. “I’m a fucking idiot, and I... I can’t. I’ve lost control of my life and I just don’t know anything anymore!” Peter swiped at his eyes angrily.
“Hey, hey, baby boy, that’s maybe a little dramatic,” Wade said, pulling Peter, who was now a sobbing mess, into his arms. “You’re still a dumb kid, and I say that with fondness for all of the dumb teenagers in my life. But you have the added stickiness of Spider-Man, which is a super adult responsibility, ya get me?”
Peter could feel Wade’s chin digging into the top of his head when he got particularly animated. He felt marginally better. Wade called him an idiot and lectured him on bodily autonomy which made Peter feel awful (but he deserved it) and didn’t even get huffy when Peter rolled his eyes like, eight times at everything else.
“Wait, did you say the stickiness of Spider-Man?” Peter said, pulling away from Wade, who cackled maniacally. “Dad jokes like that could ruin your reputation.”
“Hmm, you think there aren’t people into Dadpool? You’d be wrong!” Wade grinned at Peter’s exaggerated gagging noises and slapped him on the back. “Now, let’s go feed you before you keel over from nutrient deficiency because I can literally see your blood sugar dropping so don’t even argue with me, Peter.”
And thus began Taco Saturday, which Wade admitted didn’t have the same ring to it as Taco Tuesday, but he wasn’t about to keep Peter out after patrol on a school night. Peter knew that Wade was keeping an eye on him because he didn’t trust Matt, and it rankled him that he didn’t trust Peter to handle himself with Matt, which Peter begrudgingly understood but tried, unsuccessfully, not to spend too much mental energy worrying about.
“Red wants to take you out in the field,” Wade said, completely out of nowhere and causing Peter to choke on a nacho. Wade automatically thumped his back a few times and kept talking. “I think it’s a terrible idea but Foggy think you’ll rub off on him. Hope springs eternal for lawful good defense lawyers.”
Peter coughed again and stared at Wade. “Oh my god, I want to so bad!” He had begged Matt to patrol with him, but he was like a ninja made of stone, who really liked the word no.
Wade rolled his eyes. “You think that, but Daredevil isn’t Matt.” Peter rolled his eyes back.
“The first time I met him, he was Daredevil,” said Peter smugly.
“He was dressed as Daredevil,” Wade corrected. “That wasn’t Daredevil.”
“He was a little bit scary?” Peter offered.
“He’s a lot scarier than that, kiddo.” Wade sighed and gathered up their trash, successfully aiming the bag at a dumpster five stories below. “Just...let me know when you’re going and text me when you get home, yeah?”
Peter really, truly thought he was prepared for a Daredevil and Spider-Man team-up. Physically, he kept up just fine. Matt could map out an area with his senses, and it was amazing. He asked Peter to close his eyes and patiently talked him through honing each sense. By then, it was late and both literal and figurative darkness had fallen over Hell’s Kitchen. Queens could be rough, but it didn’t feel like this, with an undercurrent of danger and hopelessness. Peter was starting to understand how Foggy had latched onto Wade, since it was even worse when everyone was dust.
Matt skittered silently across buildings, following sounds for minutes before Peter could hear them. Peter stopped a mugging, and they helped a couple of lost college students drunkenly find their way home. They fell into a groove, Matt quickly becoming comfortable with Peter swinging them across alleys too far to jump. It was looking to be an uneventful night.
Until Matt snapped the wrist of a would-be rapist with no warning. Peter could hear each individual bone crunch. He felt dazed, frozen ten feet up on a fire escape. Matt - Daredevil - was on the ground and maiming the guy before Peter had registered a thing.
The would-be rapist screamed as Daredevil pinned him against the wall and muttered a string of threats. The woman who would’ve been his victim let out a broken sob that shook Peter out of his daze. He landed quietly in front of her and held out a hand.
“Hey, are you okay?” he tried, his voice soft. She nodded but didn’t move toward him. “You hurt?”
“No,” she said, wiping her eyes. “He - we work together and I didn’t know him very well...” she trailed off. She was young, maybe a couple years older than Peter. The sound of a finger cracking caused Peter to flinch.
“Red!” he snapped. Daredevil whipped his head around to Peter like he didn’t even know he was there. “I’m going to call the police.”
“Hmm,” said Matt. He was still pinning the absolutely silent and terrified guy to the wall, but he was looking at the woman.
“No police,” she whispered.
“Indocumentada?” Matt asked gently, like he wasn’t Daredevil moments before. The woman nodded hesitantly.
“Stick him to a wall near the street,” Matt said, shoving the would-be rapist at Peter. Peter webbed the guy’s foot to the ground to spare his destroyed wrist and called the police before returning to the alley, where Matt and the woman were huddled together, talking quietly.
“He’ll walk you home,” Matt said, both of them looking over at Peter. He squeezed Peter’s arm approvingly before disappearing up the fire escape.
“What’s your name?” Peter asked.
“Paula,” she answered hesitantly.
“Well, Paula, we’re going to get out of here the long way,” Peter said. She looked down the alley at the only way out skeptically. “Oh no, I mean up.” He held out a hand that she took without hesitating this time. “My dumbass already called the cops, which I completely intended to do after you were gone, and ah, I’m sorry about that cuz I just wasn’t thinking...” Peter scratched his head and sighed. “Anyway, hold on tight.”
Paula gasped as Peter swung them up to the roof, but she followed him without question down the fire escape and through alleys to reach her apartment. “Thank you, so much,” she said as she dug through her bag for her keys.
“Are you okay?” Peter asked. “That was...a lot.” Paula smiled sweetly at him and patted his cheek.
“You’re so young,” she said.
“I am absolutely -“ Peter started to object, but she cut him off.
“You are, Spider-Man,” Paula teased. “But I can keep a secret. And I am okay.” She hesitated before adding, with a sad smile. “Maybe Queens is different, but it takes a devil to control Hell’s Kitchen.”
Peter exhaled heavily, considering her words. Hell’s Kitchen had become ground zero for criminal mischief, and worse, after the Chitauri invasion. “You weren’t dusted, were you?” Paula shook her head. “It’s better now, at least?”
“Yes, very,” she said. “My mother said it was like only the criminals were left, and no one was here to help. Sometimes, one of the worst would end up dead, on top of a telephone pole or even literally nailed to a building!” Peter felt cold rush over him, but if he swayed, Paula didn’t notice. “That would scare everyone into behaving for a while, but it’s much better now,” she said lightly.
“Um, great,” Peter said. “Goodnight, then? Unless you need anything else,” he added in a rush, not wanting to seem dismissive to this poor girl who’d been attacked by a fucking coworker. Paula smiled sweetly.
“No, Spider-Man, and thank you,” she said. Peter stayed until he heard the door lock behind her. It was late, much more than his usual night, but he still sent Wade a short text when he got home. He couldn’t begin to reply to his usual meme-filled texts, though. Peter decided missing the next taco meet-up would be worse than ghosting Wade.
Wade didn’t pry, but he noticed.
“You’re quiet tonight, kiddo,” Wade said. And quiet for the past few days, he didn’t say. He eyed Peter’s uneaten chalupa. “You gotta eat.”
“Are you like that?” Peter asked quietly, without even meaning to. It just slipped out. They were sitting on yet another roof, legs dangling and shoulders brushing together, so Peter felt Wade tense. “Sorry,” he added quickly.
“No, it’s fine.” Wade shook his head. He glanced over at Peter. “You’re aware of the internet? You’ve seen me in action. What could I even add to that?”
“But it’s like you’re not even the same people!” Peter exclaimed. He ran a hand through his hair, growing agitated. “How can you be like this with me and like - I don’t even know how to put Deadpool into words, Wade. You nailed a guy to a building!”
“How’s that compartmentalization working out for you?” Wade asked, and it was said far too earnestly. It just made Peter more frustrated.
“Aaarrrrr!” Peter said, standing up and pacing, agitated. “I just - I am fucking Spider-Man! It’s not like I’ve never heard a bone snap, but I don’t do it on purpose, Jesus Christ!” He sat down hard in the middle of the roof. Wade scooted over to Peter and put his arm around his shoulder.
“Foggy has trouble with it too, with Matt,” he said quietly. “More than he admits. A lot of it is the lying, but he struggles with it. I know he’s grumbly, but he’d be a good one for an impromptu vent session.”
“But he doesn’t have a problem with you?” Peter asked, tucked into Wade’s side. He could feel his heartbeat from this close. It sounded like no other heartbeat, probably because Wade was sicker than a person should be able to live through.
“Not exactly,” said Wade. “I mean, Foggy does not like the extra-legal stuff, but he’s surrounded himself with vigilantes so he puts up with it. But Matt lied about DD forever and Foggy is still put out by it. Plus, Foggy grades on a curve wherein he weighs my childhood trauma and cancer as shittier than Matt’s childhood trauma and blindness, but never tell him that cuz I’m pretty sure it’s subconscious.”
“Does it hurt?” Peter asked suddenly. He felt Wade’s sudden intake of breath and his heart speed up, but he didn’t pull away.
“Geez, Petey,” he breathed. “You’re on a roll tonight. Yes, but some days are worse than others. The mental pain, though - “ He tapped Peter on the head. “It’s the worst part. I worry about all your trauma, Petey Pie. So try to be a good boy and avoid any more of it. You don’t have to worry about grown up me and all my baggage.”
Peter felt like flippancy would be the normal teenage response, but he burrowed further into Wade’s space instead. He wanted the warmth, the comfort, the protection, even if he was Spider-Man.
“Thank you,” he said into Wade’s chest. Wade ruffled his hair affectionately.
“Anytime, baby boy.”