Tony No
Tony was an idiot. He had forgotten that Rhodey said he was going to be coming over and now he had to explain the whole mess he'd found himself in. Tony was really not in the mood for this. He waved his hands around at Rhodey's question. "Cause of my good looks and charming personality?" he tried.
Rhodey raised an eyebrow in challenge and behind him, he heard Sam snickering. Such wonderful friends he had. "Winter, back me up here!" he said.
"I can state that I did not choose you for your appearance," Winter said flatly.
At Tony's expression to that statement, he heard Rhodey start laughing along with Sam, who was currently leaning on the counter to keep himself from falling to the ground. Even Vision looked amused. Tony pouted. "I am fabulous, you guys are just being mean now," he said.
That just made them laugh harder. Sam gave up on trying to support himself and was shaking on the floor. Giving up on trying to find sympathy from them Tony turned and walked over to the coffee machine. "You are all horrible. I'm not going to give you any more gifts," he said. "I hope you enjoy the pain that you're statements have caused me."
Winter was watching them all with a confused expression, clearly not knowing how to react to the environment he was in. Tony turned on the coffee machined and walked back to the counter. Sam and Rhodey had slowly stopped laughing and were making their way into chairs. Tony didn't quite know what to do about Winter, who very clearly had no idea what was going on.
"But in all honesty, I really would like to understand what is going on with the Winter Soldier," Rhodey said.
"Well, his name is Winter," Tony started. He looked around the commons and spotted Natasha sitting on the couch reading something on her tablet. Tony hesitated, feeling that maybe he shouldn't be going around talking about how Winter decided he was his handler, but it was fine. the only people here were his teammates and friends. "He decided that I was his handler," Tony admits. Winter nodded.
"Yeah, you mentioned that on the call, I'm just trying to understand why and what we're going to do about this," Rhodey said.
"I agree with Colonel Rhodes," Vision said. Rhodey's eye twitched. He had tried telling Vision to just call him Rhodey, but Vision insisted on calling him by his title.
Tony shrugged and looked over at Winter, hoping that he would be able to explain this better. It was his idea, after all. Winter just stared at him with a neutral expression. No help coming from that corner, great. "Uh..."
Rhodey rolled his eyes. "You really don't have an idea?" he asked
Tony turned and looked at Winter again. "I want to help him, and figure out this whole handler thing," he said. Winter tilted his head but didn't say anything.
"Okay, so maybe we should try to not have a handler thing? That doesn't sound like something a person needs to get better," Rhodey said.
Winter frowned and looked over at Rhodey. "I am not a person," he said. The entire room went silent.
Sam coughed awkwardly. Rhodey studied Winter and Winter stared back. "You sure? 'Cause you look like a person," he said.
Winter nodded. "I am a weapon that is to obey my handler's wishes," he said. His voice left little room for argument, and Tony had a feeling that it wouldn't help anyone if they tried to tell him that he was, in fact, a person. He didn't want to frighten Winter or cause him to panic. From what Tony's gathered he's spent a huge portion of his life being little more than a weapon. And already he had completely changed the way his daily life went. It seemed like it would be a little too early to completely change his sense of self.
Everyone else seemed to have roughly the same thoughts. Sam's face was tight, this was probably going against all of his therapist instincts, but he didn't say anything. Rhodey just frowned and nodded, glancing over at Tony who shrugged. Winter studied them all before nodding to himself before turning and watching Natasha.
The coffee machine beeped and Tony walked over to pour it into his cup. His fingers itched for something to do, and for once in his life, he wanted to go to sleep, or just do something else that would cause this day to pass quicker. Behind him, Tony heard the doors opening and supposed that Natasha had left. "On that lovely note, anyone have any ideas for lunch?" Tony asked, glancing over at the clock. It was 3:12, so it would end up being more of a late lunch.
"I think that we should have our picnic we were trying to have before we were interrupted," Wanda said. Tony tensed up and turned around. Wanda and Steve had entered the room. He couldn't see Natasha, who must have left at some point. Tony's grip tightened on the coffee mug. Rhodey glared at them as they entered.
"Actually I'm going out with Rhodey, Sam, Vision, and WInter, so we'll have to reschedule," Tony said. He really didn't want to have to spend time with them after the meeting earlier.
Steve frowned. "Tony, that's not safe," he started.
Tony held up a finger. "Actually, as long as he has the tracker, which is active, he's allowed out of the compound, so it will be perfectly fine," he said. He grabbed Winter's arm and started dragging him out of the commons. Everyone he had mentioned following him. Wanda glared at him as he passed. She raised her hands as though she was going to stop him, before stopping and taking a step back, a fearful expression on her face.
Tony smirked at her and then they were making their way towards the garage. "Have you decided where we would be going yet?" Rhodey asked as they were out of earshot. Tony shrugged.
"No, just someplace out of here so I don't have to deal with them," he said. Winter was glaring behind them, despite no one being there.
"Я мог бы убить их для тебя. Тогда вам не придется иметь с ними дело," Winter said, turning to face Tony. Everyone stared at him, clearly, nobody understood Russian. Winter frowned at them. "Did I not say that in English?" he asked.
Tony studied him. "Do you normally forgot what language you're speaking?" he asked.Winter looked away and hunched his shoulders, trying to appear smaller. "Sometimes," he said quietly. He looked at Tony through his hair. Tony scrunched up his face, it was clear he was waiting for something to happen. Was he waiting for, punishment? Because that was not happening.
"How about we get some lunch, I'm hungry," Tony said, turning towards the car. There was a moment of stunned silence before Rhodey grabbed the nearest pair of keys.
"I'm driving, I don't trust any of you, except Sam and Vision," Rhodey said. Tony turned and glared at him.
"You just said that you didn't trust me or Winter. I'll have you know that I am an excellent driver," Tony said, following Rhodey towards the van. He couldn't quite remember why he owned a van, of all cars, but it was the car that Rhodey had chosen, and it would fit them all.
Rhodey snorted. "Need I remind you of your freshman year?" he asked. That had been an adventure. It was Tony's first year in college, and he was drunk and had somehow convinced Rhodey to hotwire a car. They had gotten arrested and Howard was not at all impressed, although it was a pretty fun night. And the car wasn't even broken. There were a couple dents in it, but other than that the car was fine. Now the next car they borrowed got completely totaled, but that was a whole other story.
"That was not the worst driving I have ever done," Tony said."Exactly the reason why you are not driving," Rhodey said as he got in the car. Everyone piled in after him and they drove out of the garage. "Where are we going seeing as you clearly didn't think about that," Rhodey asked.
Tony looked at Sam. "Do you have any lunch suggestions?" he asked.
Sam shrugged. "Chick-Fil-A?" he offered. Before anyone could say anything about that Rhodey had already put it into the car's GPS. They drove in silence for a bit before Sam started talking again. "Any specific reason why you're avoiding Steve and Wanda?" he asked.
Tony shrugged, feigning nonchalance. "Just don't really feel like dealing with them today. Not after the earlier meeting," he said.
"I still don't know why you haven't just moved back to the tower," Rhodey said. "Or kick them out, you do own the compound," he added.
Sam turned to look at Tony."Wait, so you can just kick them out anytime you want?" he asked. Tony nodded. Sam hummed, "Remind me to never get on your bad side," he said. Mostly everyone in the car laughed, the only person who didn't was Winter. Who was staring out the window in wonder.
Soon, they entered the city and drove up to the Chick-Fil-A building. Rhodey parked and turned to look at everyone over the seat. "Are we just going to go through the drive-through or go inside?" he asked.
"I vote inside," Tony said, everyone nodded agreement and Rhodey turned off the car. The doors unlocked and they all got out of the car, walking towards the door. They entered the building and walked up to the counter. Because they were coming after the normal lunchtime there wasn't anyone in the restaurant except for a group of teenagers chatting in the back.
The worker, a young girl with brown hair pulled into a ponytail looked up at them as they walked up to the counter. For a moment, her expression stayed in the bored look before her eyes widened as she saw Tony Stark standing there staring up at the menu. She gaped at him for a couple seconds before recovering her wits. "Can I get you anything?" she asked.
Tony smiled at her and then turned to the group. "So, what does everyone want?" he asked.
"Spicy chicken sandwich," Sam said.
Rhodey glanced up at the menu for a second, "I'll take a grilled chicken sandwich," he said.
Vision shrugged, he didn't exactly eat seeing as he was a robot.
Winter was staring at just about everything but the menu. "Hey, Winter," Tony said. Winter turned and faced Tony. "What do you want to eat?" he asked.
Winter frowned. "I don't know," he said, glancing up at the menu. His eyes flicked through all the options before glancing around the restaurant again. Checking to make sure there weren't any enemies, Tony realized.
"How about we just get you some chicken nuggets?" he asked. They were one of the simplest meals on the menu, and nobody disliked chicken nuggets. Tony's personal favorite was the ones shaped like dinosaurs. Rhodey called him a child for it whenever he spotted them in the freezer, but Tony would swear by his life that dino shaped nuggets were the best nuggets.
Winter nodded and continued scanning the room. "Great, I'll have chicken strips and everyone's getting lemonade," he said. You simply could not go to Chick-Fil-A and not get the lemonade. It's a tradition. "Did you hear everyone else's orders?" he asked the girl.
She nodded and typed them out into the computer in front of her. "Would you like a side with those?" she asked.
"Uh, yeah, we'll all just take fries," Tony said. He took out his credit card as soon as she entered that into the computer.
"That will be $35.64," the girl said. Tony nodded and paid for it before herding everyone towards a table. He chose one near the back in the corner. Winter took a seat facing everyone else in the restaurant. He made sure that he could sit at the edge, probably so he would be able to get out quickly if needed.
In a remarkably short time, the girl came over bearing trays laden with food. She passed them out at the table and then walked back over to the counter. Tony dragged his food over and curled over it. "Oh it's been so long," he said.
Rhodey snorted. "Pretty sure you went last week," he said.
"Yes, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away," he said dramatically. Sam laughed and Rhodey just stared at him. "Oh come on!" Tony said. "That was a good time for a Star Wars reference," he said.
"You watched Star Wars yesterday," Winter commented. How did he know that? Tony was pretty sure that he had been stuck in the hulk cell. Someone must have told him, or it could be some unknown soviet assassin ability he had.Tony dipped one of his chicken strips into the nearest sauce. "Yeah, have you seen any of them?" he asked.
Winter nodded. "Friday showed me the one that you were watching last night," he said. Which meant that Winter hadn't seen any of the other movies. Tony had to educate him at the nearest possible time.
"When we get back we're doing a Star Wars marathon, Red October needs to see them," he said. "You have way to much time on your hands," Rhodey said. Even Winter agreed with that. It's not his fault that world-ending catastrophes only happen every once in a while. Besides, what was he expected to do as they waited for the next Avengers call. Actual work? Who did Rhodey think he was.
"You just wished that you had time away from your boring job that you could do a movie marathon with me," Tony said.
Rhodey shrugged. "Eh, I'll be able to be there for most of the marathon before I need to get back. Someone has to make sure you don't make yet more stupid decisions during this marathon," he said.
"And what might those be?" Tony demanded.
"You learned three fictional languages, Tony!"
"And that seems to be an amazing use of my time. You just wish you knew them."
"Sure."
Sam stared at them. "So what I'm getting from this is that if Tony watches too many movies he'll learn fictional languages?" he asked.
Rhodey shook his head. "First he wanted to make a lightsaber," he said.
"And I still want to!" Tony defended. Besides, that would be epic. Especially if he could actually make it work. Imagine being in a battle and pulling out a fully functioning lightsaber. It would be completely epic.
"Can you make one?" Winter asked. He looked much more interested in this part of their conversation than any other thing they had been saying. Probably because it was a weapon. Imagine being faced by a lightsaber-wielding Winter Soldier. Of course, it would be completely unresponsible to give a semi-stable Russian assassin a weapon like that. Tony was so doing it once he figured out how to make one.
"Tony no," Rhodey said as he discovered what Tony was thinking.
"Tony yes," Tony said back.
Vision sighed. "I do not think it would be wise to go through that plan of action," he commented.
"You don't even know what I was thinking!" Tony defended himself. Sure they probably have guessed it by now but they didn't actually know.
Sam huffed. "You're going to make a lightsaber and mess around with it," he said.
"Well yes, but for science!"
"We're not going to be able to talk you out of this, are we?" Sam asked. Tony shook his head.
"I think it's a good idea," Winter commented. "Especially if it works as it did in the movie."
Rhodey lowered his head into his hands. "You're going to teach him the fictional languages and give him a lightsaber," he said.
"I'm going to teach him the wonderful languages I know and give him a lightsaber," Tony agreed. Winter looked very happy with that fact.