Jörmungandr
give thor a kitten for me (but don't tell loki)
- anon
Thor finds the kitten in the overgrown field that stretches out toward the mountains behind the place that is their home this month.
It’s tiny, scrawny, shaking as Thor scoops it up in his arms, but it barely struggles. Thor sees no sign of its mother or any siblings. It mews piteously as he picks the burrs and leaves from its soft black fur.
“Do you want to come home with me?” he asks it.
It pushes its paws against his arms and meows again. The fact that it keeps its little needle-like claws sheathed, well, Thor takes that as some sort of affirmative answer.
Thor doubts Loki will let him keep it, but that is a problem for later so he doesn’t let it worry him now. He hides the little creature under his jacket when he carries it inside.
Thor doesn’t remember anything from before he was with Loki. His brother tells him he was very small then.
“What happened to me before that?” Thor has asked him.
“I don’t know. You were grown… and then something happened, I don’t know what. And when I found you, you were a child again. I don’t understand it either.”
Thor has only a few faint memories of his life before. A strong sense of his identity, but it is unanchored, adrift in a far greater haze. He knows Loki is his brother. And Loki has raised him for all the lifetime he can remember.
The few faint memories he can recall…
Something isn’t right. He’s asked Loki to take him back to Asgard, to their mother and father, and he can’t remember how long Loki has been telling him that something has gone wrong with the Bifrost, or that there is a storm between realms that means they can’t send word, or that their parents are away on some important matter of the realm’s safety and cannot come to get them. All Thor knows is that it’s been so long, he’s started to doubt it.
Among the very faintest memories from before are a few of Loki concocting stories to get them out of trouble.
So he knows Loki lies sometimes. But he still doesn’t understand why, this time.
Thor tiptoes to his room in their little house, feeling the kitten purring against his side. At one point it squirms and Thor thinks it might start making noise, and he hastens his steps, but it stays mostly quiet for long enough, and when the door shuts behind him, Thor heaves a sigh of relief.
When he draws it out and lets it down onto the soft rug, it tries its legs, a little shaky. Getting its bearings. Figuring out where it is.
Thor wonders if they’re both in trouble and that’s why Loki won’t take them back to Asgard. He’s wondered that, and he knows Loki loves him and is trying to protect him, but he has still felt too awkward about it to ask. He doesn’t want to be in trouble.
The kitten is a good distraction, and Thor plays with it, stifling his giggles as it tries to hunt his toes within his socks. He closes it up carefully in his room that evening as he goes down to dinner.
At the end of their meal, Loki looks at him and heaves a sigh.
“Well, we do have some tuna. I suppose that’ll suffice until I can get something more appropriate.”
Thor frowns. “What?”
“Your new pet. You do intend to feed it, don’t you? Brother, there is a great deal of responsibility involved in caring for another creature. It’s not all fun and games.”
Thor’s face feels hot. But he doesn’t think it’s entirely because he’s been caught and found out when he thought he had been stealthy.
“We can find a dish to use for water as well tonight. Tomorrow we’ll have to see about a litter box…”
Thor’s eyes sting, and his throat feels tight. He’s not sure why.
“Thor?”
When Loki wraps him in an embrace, it feels… strange. Just a little bit, but just like it does every time. Like he’s not expecting it, somewhere deep down. And that is more confusing than any of the rest of it. Why would he not expect his brother to care for him? True, he was used to being older than Loki… and he bets that when he was grown up he probably didn’t need anyone’s help ever. But…
“Thor, my dear one, what’s wrong?”
Thor presses his face against his brother’s shoulder and tries to hold back the tears.
Maybe it’s because, every time, Loki seems like he’s not quite sure what he’s doing, either. Like it’s all strange for him too.
Eventually, Thor just cries, and Loki just holds him, stroking his back, making little shushing noises. Picks him up and carries him over to the sofa so they can both sit more comfortably.
“It’s all right, brother,” Loki whispers to him. “You haven’t done anything wrong. I love you so much, and we are both safe and well, and if you want a kitten, you may have a kitten. We will care for it together.”
There is a warm happiness inside him, then, despite the tears that he can’t seem to stop.
When the tears do stop, it seems to happen all at once. He heaves a heavy sigh and then the world feels different around him, though Loki still holds him gently.
“Have you thought of a name for it yet?” Loki asks just at that moment, as if he knows.
Thor pushes back, so they can look at each other.
“I want to call him Jörmungandr.”
Loki laughs loud and long. “Very well,” he says, grinning. “Let us then go and ready dinner for the kitten whose tail will one day encircle the world.”
Thor takes his brother’s hand, and together they go to seek out a can of tuna from the cupboard.