Chapter 5
Shopping with Wade was going exactly how Piotr thought it would go. He almost regretted not hooking the man up to a modified child leash. No, he definitely regretted it.
Right now they were in the bath section, getting Wade his own towel, and he was trying as hard as he could to convince Piotr to let him get a beach towel with a cartoon character.
"Okay maybe not the baby shark one but what about the Elsa one? I genuinely like the Frozen movies and she's so cool." After a while of pouting and puppy eyes, Piotr caved and let him get the towel, as long as he also got a normal one for when that one was dirty. Wade wasted no time in agreeing. He ended up caving again into tossing an Elsa themed toothbrush into the cart, along with toothpaste to match. Another compromise had to be made for body wash, though, with Wade agreeing to use a fancy-pantsy high class sensitive skin body wash as long as he also got a bottle of Hello Kitty bubble bath (strawberry scented) and a matching washcloth. When it came to it he didn't really care about what lotion, deodorant, and mouthwash Piotr picked out as long as it wasn't "that stupid Manly Men For Men Made Of Car Oil and Wood Shavings shit." Sure he used Irish Spring, but he wasn't so heteronormative and afraid of having his 'fragile masculinity' compromised to use stuff called Bearclaw Extreme Armpit Grease or Mens Hand Cream For The Working Male Dude.
He also wasn't as pushy when it came to groceries, not dogging Piotr after he refused to get him Sour Patch Kids Cereal or those weird twinkies they sell now. You know the ones.
In response Piotr didn't say no as often as he did in the bath section. If it meant Wade would eat, he didn't think twice tossing in the (somewhat healthy) foods the man asked for. And nothing compared to the look on Wade's face when he stuck a pack of Berry Medley juice boxes and chocolate flavored breakfast replacement drinks respectively onto the under cart bed.
When they had a good amount of groceries, with a second cart now being pushed by Wade because of how full the other one got, they made their way to the check out lines. Not before passing the clothing section though. Piotr stopped for a second to eye it, scanning the soft work out shirts and array of lounge pants they offered as Wade prattled on about how although Frozen and Frozen 2 showed the progress of storytelling and character creation it also showed how lazy the animation has gotten for the sake of ease and releasing the movies as soon as they can.
"When was last time you got new clothing," Piotr asked, interrupting Wades think piece on Kristoff's song Lost in the Woods, which despite how cheesy it was it was a really good change from the female characters pining and yearning for the male characters even though he wished it was taken a little more seriously.
"Huh. Oh, I dunno, years ago maybe. Anyway, there's too many jokes in children's media based around men showing emotion and oh-so-progressive Disney still adheres to the mockery of male vulnerability-" Wade rambled on, not even noticing Piotr making a sharp turn to the clothing section and instead just turned with him. Piotr assumed Wade would be a medium, both shirt and pants wise, and didn't even humor the idea of getting him jeans, doubting he even knew his measurements anyway. Piotr was sure that he himself didn't wear the correct measurements. He stuck to joggers and soft pants, a few basketball shorts. He tried to pick the softest shirts he could, worried about just how sensitive Wade's skin really was but didn't want to interrupt his rant on the subtlety of sexism in kids movies and how it affects children's view on gender and who can feel what emotions. It was kind of impressive, actually, watching him give a whole Ted talk in the middle of a Target.
They made their way to the check out, Wade making his final few points before quieting down, and the ride back to the mansion was made in relative peace. As always, a good number of the trainees came out to help put the groceries away when they arrived partly out of gratitude and partly out of a feeling of obligation. None of them spared a glance as Wade rushed through the mansion doors and darted up the stairs, his hands full of the bags that contained his stuff specifically. After things were put away neat and nice Piotr started the kids on making their own grilled cheeses and putting a big pot of tomato soup to go with it. It was a dinner that was usually a big pleaser, even to the pickiest of eaters, and didn't take too much effort. After all the kids we're fed and happy, Pitor prepped the pots and pans to soak before taking a helping he put to the side for Wade and making his way to the room.
“Ooo, grilled cheese and tomato soup, a big pleaser even to the pickiest of eaters!” Wade exclaimed when he looked to see what Piotr was holding. He quickly scrambled out of his spot on the bed, Hello Kitty bubble bath bottle quickly closed and discarded, to take the plate and bowl from the large metal man and scrambled to the armchair sat in front of Colossus’ Colosul Work Desk. Whenever Wade was up for eating, all by himself, but wasn’t keen on being around people he usually preferred eating at Piotr’s desk, which took a lot of convincing and pleads of “I’ll be so careful you don’t even know, you’ll have never seen someone as careful as me I promise”. As he scarfed down lunch Piotr walked over to the bed to grab the abandoned bubble bath bottle.
"Would you like me to run you bath?" Piotr asked after inspecting it. He could hear Wade halt his chewing, a nervous beat hanging in the air where Piotr was worried he said something very, very wrong. To his relief though;
"Yeah. I'd like that."