Chapter 13
You threw your pen down in exasperation and growled. No matter what you wrote over the last four hours, it always ended up having something wrong. You were down to the final act of the movie and you can’t seem to find a suitable ending for your character.
You laid down on your bed and closed your eyes, maybe some sleep would clear your head. But as soon as you closed them, all you can see is the sad smile Logan gave you after he kissed you then told him no. It had been three days since that day and you knew he was giving the both of you some space to reel from it. How easy would it be to give in to him? He hit all the boxes--he’s smart, funny and most of all, he was right there for you to grab. He’s available not like that guy who you’ve been pining for for a little over a year now. Speaking of that guy, and being that you can’t sleep anyway (or at least that’s what you thought), you grab your phone on the bedside and open your Instagram feed. You only follow one hashtag anyway and you immediately smile when you see a shirtless paparazzi picture of him as he stands in what looks to be a yacht. You don’t see the caption right away until you swipe left to see more.
Sebastian in a clear liplock with a blonde woman clad in a bikini. Sebastian looking like he enjoyed it. The two of them lying on the deck of the yacht, Sebastian reaching for her.
Your vision begins to blur with tears, clearly the pictures are proof that the three days you and him spent in a bubble mean nothing to him at all. You felt so stupid to your core that you wanted to bash your head against a wall. Geri and Hart warned you, but you shrugged them off, fully trusting in the genuine connection you had made with him in Chicago. When something was too good to be true, you realized that it really was too good to be true.
Exiting out of the app, you lie face down in your bed, fighting the tears off but they come anyway. Sleep finally takes you, and though you know that what you just saw and learned were true, you still wished you’d wake up and find that it was just a nightmare anyway.
You woke up with a groan, your hunger finally catching up to you. Much as you wanted to stay in bed, you knew you needed to eat. A ring of your phone interrupts your trek to the kitchen.
“Hey, Y/N.”
Your breath hitches as Logan’s familiar, easy drawl floats on your ear. You didn’t know if you wanted to cry or sigh in relief. You were still conflicted despite what you saw earlier. Despite the improbable reality with Sebastian, you weren’t able to just switch off your feelings for him with a flick of a finger.
“Hey...Logan,” you respond rather weakly. “How are you? About last week, listen--”
You hear him take a sharp breath before cutting you off. “Y/N. No. It really is okay. You don’t have to say anything more than what was already said. You didn’t have to and shouldn’t have to apologize for how you feel and who you feel for.”
“I…,” you still wanted to say something, but words seemed to have eluded momentarily. “You’re a fantastic guy, you have to know that.”
He chuckles this time, and you couldn’t help but smile. “I know I am. She’s out there, just need to keep looking a little harder.”
Your stomach grumbles and despite being in a phone conversation, Logan seems to hear it. “Damn it Y/N, did you forget to eat again?”
And just about an hour later, Logan was back in your living room with boxes and boxes of take out fit not just for two, but for about four. You looked at him in shock upon seeing him at your door with it.
“Oh fuck,” you say as you leaned back on the couch. “A girl is never going to lose weight if she keeps eating like she’s doing so for ten people. Are you kidding me Logan?!”
You let out a hearty laugh as you patted your stomach. Logan does too before beginning to clean up. You make to stand but he gives you a stern but playful look. You knew he meant business and so you stayed on your seat and let him finish.
“How’s the ending coming along?” he asks as he comes back after a few minutes. You smile gratefully as he hands you a cup of tea.
“Ugh, you had to ask,” you respond with a bit of annoyance. “I’m fucking stuck. I started writing about a dozen ideas but none seemed to stick. I went at it for half a day and decided to stop and sleep it off but even that I didn’t have luck with.”
“Can I read the last arc again?” he asks. You pull up your laptop and slide it over to him. You wring your hands as he carefully took the time to read your script again, one that he had probably seen tons of times. If there was anyone who could have it memorized other than you, it would have been Logan.
“So?” you were jittery as you asked. You couldn’t decipher anything from him, all you could see was him raising an eyebrow every now and then plus the occasional pause to look at you. Other than that, his expressions were absolutely blank and had left you clueless. “You’re killing me here.”
Finally to your relief, he stops and looks at you. Sliding back your laptop to your side of the table, he leans back and looks at you knowingly.
“I think you know how this ends, Y/N. You wrote Midnight to your likeness. She is you and you’re her.”
That night, you couldn’t sleep once more. You decided to re-read your script and you found yourself gasping at parts you’ve written that were similar to your own experiences. Now you knew what Logan meant when he said you were Midnight and vice versa. Finding renewed energy and inspiration, you finally realized how you wanted to finish your script and spent the rest of the night writing it.
“What the fuck…” Sebastian muttered angrily as soon as he saw his Instagram feed. About a couple of decades in that was the majority of his life he still was none the wiser when it came to paparazzi pictures. He even said hi to the guy who was riding a jetski close to the yacht he rented out for some alone time with Maya. He’d been nice enough and he couldn’t believe that somewhere in his ride was a perfectly concealed camera that had taken photos of them while they enjoyed themselves in what felt like was the perfect summer day.
His email pings as well from an anonymous sender. He absent mindedly clicks it and in it were various screen shots of text message conversations...from Maya and Esmeralda. He had to translate some of them as they were in Spanish but it was clear as day, the women had conspired from the get go, from manipulating Jon to introduce Maya to him, up until inviting him for Esmeralda’s birthday. All just to be photographed with him. It seemed preposterous yet at the same time, this wasn’t new to him.
Deciding to rest for a bit, he makes his way to his room and drops on his bed, falling asleep in minutes.
“Hey Maz,” Sebastian stands up from his seat to give his friend, Joe a hug. “Thanks for meeting me on short notice.”
Joe waves a hand and makes a face at him. “Peesh, you make it sound like an inconvenience. How long have we been friends?”
“Oh man, I don’t know...more than 10 years at least?”
“Exactly. Anyway, what’s up? You don’t look like a guy who enjoyed his vacation. I’m guessing that’s why you wanted to talk?”
Sebastian breathed a sigh of relief. He truly had some of the greatest people in the world to call friends. Joe was definitely high up on the list. They may not see each other often, it amazed him that he still knows him so very well.
He then proceeds to tell him all about the Ibiza pap pictures debacle.
“I think I really like this girl, but man...that email threw me for a loop. What if it’s true?”
Joe takes a sip of his drink before responding. “Honestly?” Sebastian nods.
“I don’t think you like her, Seb.”
Sebastian’s eyes widen in surprise. Maya seemed like a nice girl. She was easy to be with, something he hasn’t really experienced in so long. There were no expectations ever since they started texting up until they finally met in Spain. The sex was good, why wouldn’t he like her?
“Hear me out,” Joe interjects before Sebastian could respond. “You don’t do casual. Hell, you’re one of the few people I know that doesn’t go on one night stands. The way I see it, you just miss being in a relationship so you snatch up the first girl that comes your way. You’re a conversation guy, you like getting to know someone on an emotional level. You love the process of finding if there’s a connection between you and someone else. Not this casual, fuck buddy bullshit you’re doing.”
Now that felt like a punch in the gut. Now that he had some time to think about it, all he and Maya ever did was jump each other like bunnies whenever they were alone. Even porn stars would be put to shame by the sheer number of condoms he had to use. The few things he knew about her were stuff that anyone could find on the internet. The sex was great, but how long can he keep that up?
“I really want to punch you right now,” he mutters weakly. “But damn man, I think you’re right.”
“I know I’m right. Hey,” Joe slaps him in the arm. “Whatever happened to that girl you kissed at the airport in Chicago? Will and Chace said you couldn’t shut up about her.”
A tight knot forms in Sebastian’s throat as a pang of regret washes over him.
“You alright?”
“Fuck if I know,” he grits out. “Ugh, this sucks.”
“Your gut has always served you well, my friend. I can’t possibly tell you to dump Maya, that’s your call. But if there’s one more thing I can trust, it’s that we know you much better than you think we do.”
Sebastian didn’t have to wait long. A couple of days after he received the email, he got a text from his publicist about something he found about his current paramour.
Max
Got a tip about your girl. I think she set you up for the pap pix. Call me when you get this or better yet,drop by the office.
“I don’t know who sent this,” Max says as Sebastian takes a seat in front of him. “I thought you might be able to recognize the voices so…” He starts playing the audio file. Sebastian immediately recognizes Maya’s and Esmeralda’s voices talking in fragments of English and Spanish. It doesn’t play long and after it finishes, Sebastian sat there, his mouth open in shock and disbelief.
“Hey, I’m sorry, man,” Max tells him. “As your publicist I’d tell you to keep her for a while, people are wildly interested in you again, but as your friend, if I were you, I’d dump her ass as soon as I can.”
“Fucking hell. Do I look like I have ‘stupid’ branded across my forehead in big, neon letters?”
"Whoa whoa whoa stop it. Just don't fucking go there, alright?" Max says to him in a calming tone. "You're one of the smartest and kindest people I know. It's not your fault your sincerity's always being trampled on. People just suck."
"What do I do then?" Sebastian asks with a sigh.
"I think you already know, Seb."
“Just tell me the truth, Maya,” Sebastian asks, trying his impatience not to show in his voice. As much as he knew it would hurt, he decided to confront her head on about his discovery. Better to put salt on the wounds now so he could focus on healing it later.
“I’m so sorry, Sebastian,” Maya says, half choking as if she was already crying. “It was my intention in the beginning, but I realized it was a mistake when I’d gotten to know you. I genuinely like you. Please forgive me.”
“Well I am sorry too Maya,” he responds with finality. “I can’t be in a relationship that began in a lie. If there was anything you had to learn about me, it’s that I hate people lying to me.”
He wishes her a good life before hanging up, not caring if she still had more to say. “Oh fuck,” he mutters angrily.
Somehow managing to fall asleep after that stressful phone call, he finds himself waking up when it’s dark outside already. Thankful that most of the places he goes to were still open, he changes into jeans and a sweatshirt to grab a meal. A good walk in the early city evening would help him clear his head.
While seated and waiting for his order, he whips out his phone and begins scrolling through his text messages to see who he can badger for a drink or two later on. He stops at a text thread that only has a phone number on it.
His breath stops upon realizing who he was conversing with on the thread. Y/N, he thought sadly. It had to have been nearly a year and a half already since those three magical days in Chicago. A tidal wave of memories wash over him--their late night conversations, of her waking up in his arms, of him just watching the gentle rise and fall of her shoulders as she slept peacefully beside him.
The way she melted into him every time they kissed. The way his heart beat out of his chest everytime.
He suddenly felt foolish for not contacting her all this time and even getting involved with a woman who only got together with him because he was famous.
Would it be too late to try and get ahold of her again?
Thankfully, he only had about a year to find out.