Chapter 12
Castiel and Sam rushed Dean into the bathroom inside one of the many rooms in the corridor, with Natasha following behind.
“Open the shower. Make sure the water is cold.” Castiel ordered Sam, as he gripped the still writhing Dean and started to undress him fast.
Sam rushed to open the water, while Natasha moved to collect the clothes Castiel removed off of Dean.
Meanwhile, Dean was staring hard at Castiel’s burned arms with wide eyes, almost forgetting about his current situation.
“Your-your arms. Cas, your arms-what?” Dean breathed out as he stared at Castiel with panicked eyes.
“Shh, I will be fine. Get in the shower.” Castiel dismissed his concern, as he stripped Dean down to his underwear then pushed him under the shower.
Dean hissed loudly as the cold water hit his red, burned tender body and he crumpled on the floor of the shower from the intensity and relief.
Castiel dropped on his knees in front of him, trailing his hands gently over the overly tender parts of his husband’s body, healing it discreetly without making the hunter notice anything, who was leaning against his touch in pure relief, Castiel just pulled him closer, not caring about getting wet.
“Dean, what the hell happened?” Sam asked breathlessly, still looking shaken from all of this. “How did you guys end up in that hole?”
Dean looked up at him sharply, like Sam’s voice startled him or something.
“Steve, Charles, how are-are they okay?” Dean swallowed hard as he tried to force himself to say an understandable sentence, while leaning heavily against Castiel.
“We pulled them out, but they don’t seem to be doing okay.” Natasha sighed tiredly, looking worried and concerned to no end. “Please, tell us what happened.”
Dean was silent for a few seconds, a pained look on his face that didn’t seem to be from his burns, which Castiel was still healing secretly.
“We-we were walking down that corridor.” Dean cleared his throat as he started to talk with a strangled voice. “Everything was normal, until the EMF meter started to go crazy every time I point it towards the floor. Then a black, shadowy hand appeared from the floor and started to pull Charles under.” The pained look on his face increased at that, he looked down and away. “Steve and I tried to release him. We tried very hard, but that fucking hand kept dragging him down stubbornly, then two more hands shot out, grabbed me and Steve then we all were dragged into that hole.” He winced as his hands shot up to his ears again and hissed in pain. “The moment we were in that hole it was hell. Hands grabbed at us from everywhere and anywhere, groping, clawing and touching like it was trying to claw its way under our skin. Then I started getting flashes of every bad thing that happened to me, since the moment I was born. I could tell the same thing happened to Steve and Charles from the screams and shouts I heard. I got stuck on my memories of hell in vivid detail, until you guys pulled me out.”
With that, Dean’s body completely leaned against Castiel’s, like he was desperately craving his comfort. The angel wrapped his arms tightly around him and pulled him against his chest.
“Did you see what things lives in that hole?” Sam asked carefully, seemed to be shaken up for what his brother and friends just went through.
“No, I just felt their hands, it was dark, I couldn’t see a thing.” Dean shook his head then frowned a little. “But at the end, the amount of hands dropped to just two, like the others disappeared suddenly.”
Castiel frowned at that and shared a look with Sam and Natasha.
“Sam, could you get clothes for Dean, please?” Castiel asked, while looking up at the tall Winchester.
“Yeah, yeah, okay, I will be right back.” Sam gave his brother one last, concerned look, before making his way out of the bathroom. Natasha trailed her eyes between them, before taking Dean’s thrown clothes and moving to put them away.
Castiel turned to Dean and frowned in concern when he saw the hunter clawing at his ears again.
“What’s wrong with your ears?” he asked carefully, as he removed one of Dean’s hands to take a closer look at his ear.
“I don’t know, I feel a burning inside them that’s driving me crazy.” Dean groaned in pain as he clawed at his ears.
Castiel trailed his hand slowly through the hunter’s hair, secretly healing the pain in his ears, he knew when Dean will notice, he will be pissed. He made Castiel promise that he will not use his grace for a while even if it was for the hunter himself, but Dean should know that it was a promise he could never keep. He can’t just watch Dean in pain and just let him, while he can take that pain away.
Dean buried his face into Castiel’s chest and just relaxed against him. Breathing him in, like he was grounding himself by Castiel’s presence.
“I failed them.” Dean whispered barely audible into Castiel’s chest.
The angel frowned in confusion, before looking down at the hunter in his arms. “Failed who, Dean?”
“Steve. Charles. I couldn’t look out for them. They trusted me to do it, their husbands trusted me to do it and I failed them all. They are hurt on my watch, Cas. Tony and Erik must be devastated right now. They are my friends, they trusted me and I failed them all.” Dean shook his head miserably, as he took a shaking breath in. “I should have-“
“Dean, stop, just stop.” Castiel interrupted him firmly, before cupping his face and pulled him away a little so he could meet his eyes head on. “This is not your fault. No one is blaming or even judging you. You were caught off guard just like them.”
“That’s the problem, Cas!” Dean exclaimed as he pulled away to rub at his face in frustration, his whole body tense as hell. “I am not supposed to be caught off guard. I am a hunter. This is my area of expertise, that’s why I am here! To do the job that I have been doing all my life! If I can’t protect my family and friends on the thing that I am good at, then I am a useless failure. I am nothing. To everyone.”
“How dare you say that?” Castiel demanded in a stern voice, making Dean look up at him in surprise. “Dean Winchester, you were never, and shall ever be, nothing to anyone. How can’t you, after all this time, still don’t see your worth? Look around you, Dean. They trust and love you, not because of your ‘expertise’ and ‘good hunting skills’, they do because you matter to them. because you are important to them. Why do you think Tony just keeps dragging you around every time he has to do something? Why do you think Steve wakes you forcefully every morning, so you can make breakfast together? Why Natasha fucks with you all the time and the moment you are in trouble or hurt, she is instantly glued to you? Why Erik always seeks your company whenever he is around? Why Charles always trusted you with his life? Why Clint calls you the dad? Why Bucky always made sure to bring pie when it’s his turn to go grocery shopping? Why Thor seeks your opinion when he is planning to do something new? why Bruce keeps asking you to be his lap assistant whenever he was there? Why Raven and Charlie calls you big bro?”
Castiel cupped Dean’s cheeks then, and continued more gently with a soft smile. “Because you matter to all of them. Because they care about you and sees you as part of the family. Not because you are an amazing hunter, but because you are you. Because you are Dean, a sarcastic, mean son of a bitch with a big, beautiful heart.”
Dean was staring at him with wide awed eyes, looking to be completely mesmerized with every word the angel was saying.
“It’s true, you know. Every word he said.” Natasha’s voice broke their locked eyes, and they looked up to see her leaning against the bathroom’s doorframe with a towel drabbed on her shoulder and a small smile directed at Dean. “Emphases on the ‘son of a bitch’ part.”
Dean snorted a little as he looked at her with a pale smile, as she came over to shut the water from the shower then wrap the towel over him.
“No one blames you. We blame the fuckers that did this to you and to those poor kids.” She murmured as she rubbed the towel over his head to dry him. “So man up and move your sorry ass to see how the others are doing. It’s not time for you to mope in misery.”
Dean looked over at Castiel, who was smiling at him softly then looked back at Natasha to give her a small grateful smile, that she responded to with a roll of her eyes and a slight smile.
“Let me get dressed then we will go.”
***
Tony helped Steve on the bed and covered his shivering body with every blanket he could find in the room, while Clint and Bucky brought him blankets from all the surrounding rooms.
But the soldier just kept shivering, like the cold was deep in his very bones. Tony was getting desperate, especially with the fact that Steve still hasn’t uttered a word, since they pulled him out. He had no idea what happened to him down there in that hole, but Steve was not weak or easily traumatized.
Whatever happened down there, it was horrible enough to do this to his very strong willed husband.
And the same thing happened to two of his closest friends.
He had no idea what to do.
“That’s all the blankets we found in all the surrounding rooms.” Bucky stated nervously, eyes glued to his shivering friend. “We also increased the heating in the room at high. I don’t know what else to do.”
Tony followed his line of sight to stare at his husband, who curled into a ball under all the blankets with his eyes screwed shut, as he shivered from a cold only he could feel.
They were in summer! There wasn’t even a cold breeze in the air, everyone in the room was sweating from the heat and yet it was doing nothing to Steve.
Something was so horribly wrong.
“Just-just go check on Charles and Dean.” Tony said and started to push Bucky out of the room, when the man was about to protest, he added desperately. “I can’t leave Steve like this and I need to know how they are doing, please. Just go see how they are doing and come tell me. I will be here with Steve.”
Bucky trailed his eyes between Tony and Steve for a few seconds, before sighing in defeat then nodded silently.
After he left, Tony walked to his husband, slipping under the huge amount of blankets, despite how hot he felt, then pulled Steve close to hold his head close to his chest and brushed his fingers through his hair.
Steve immediately wrapped around him to bury his face into the genius’ chest, like he craved the closeness and Tony’s warmth desperately.
“Aren’t you going to speak for me, baby?” Tony murmured softly, while trailing his fingers through the soft blond hair. “Come on, baby, let me hear your voice. Let me know if you are okay.”
Steve just moved closer to Tony, like he was trying to crawl inside him and hide from the world.
Tony’s heart broke at the scene. His husband should never be like this. He was always standing tall and stubborn against anything that came his way. Even at his weakest, he still was the strongest person he knew.
So he was at a loss here. Steve never became like this, not even after a really bad panic attack or something. Whatever he saw down there might have broken him.
He cupped Steve’s face gently and pulled his face away a little so he could meet his eyes, which were opened wide and a little dazed. His shivering calmed down a little, but he was still clinging to Tony.
“Baby? Please.” He whispered softly, placing a small kiss against his forehead. “Please, say something.”
A pained look crossed Steve’s face, before he shook his head with a sigh.
“Why? Why won’t you speak? Even if it was just one word, Steve. I will take it. I just need to hear your voice. Please.” Tony was getting desperate in every passing second.
Steve looked away, then raised a hand towards his throat to press his fingers against it gingerly.
He was trying to tell him something.
“What? What is it, sweetheart?” Tony asked in confusion.
Steve gestured towards his throat again, looking up desperately at Tony this time.
“Your throat? Is it hurting you?”
Steve shook his head.
“Your-your vocal cords?”
Steve nodded this time.
“Your vocal cords? Wait, are saying that you want to talk, but-but you can’t?”
Another pained look crossed the soldier’s face, before nodding again.
Tony paused as he stared at his husband. Unable to comprehend what he was saying, well, what he wasn’t saying.
That-that can’t be right. Right?
“You-you can’t speak. You can’t even say a single word?” Tony breathed out, as he fought against his rising panic.
Steve looked away and shut his eyes in pain.
“Oh, God.” The genius murmured with wide eyes. “What the hell happened to you down there?”