Chapter 67
"Our meetings are so frequent that it's almost a good idea to set a regular day and time," Beck said amusedly as he joined Peter, who was packing his things after the robotic club. "So tell me, I know something is happening."
Peter sighed. "It's interesting, you can notice right away and my family can't."
"Oh, Peter, don't talk like that," Quentin scolded. "It's clear to me that it's hard for you now. But did you try to take the first step when you wanted to be heard?"
"No," Peter admitted, scratching the back of his neck. "Actually... when Dad tried to work something out with me, I yelled at him a lot. I know he meant it well, but I don't want anyone to hurt him. I don't want to see him unhappy. I am avoiding him. I don't want to make it worse. Aunt Nat and Uncle Bruce are great, but I can't be with them all the time. It always makes me very tired and I don't understand why. "
"Your dad definitely doesn't want to push you into anything, and maybe he's just waiting for you to come to him. If you avoid everyone, it's hard for them to tell that something's going on," Beck encouraged him gently. Peter smiled.
"I know. I like them, but I don't think they would understand me. They don't believe me. It's really weird that I get along only with you lately. You are... impartial. And you try to understand me and advise me. I really appreciate it, sir. "
Beck smiled and put his hand on his shoulder. "I'm glad to hear that, Peter, that's why I am here. To help you."
"Don't you want to be a psychologist or something?"
He laughed. "God help us. So, tell me. Are you still worried about Pepper? Or is there something else in it?"
"Well... I'm actually thinking just about her all the time. I miss her so much and it annoys me. I can't call her and humiliate myself, and I probably wouldn't be able to do that when I know she's hurting Dad. Or isn't she? I don't know," he breathed in frustration and ran his hand through his hair. "I saw her with that guy. But only once. If I saw her again, at least I would have proof that I didn't really make it up, that I wasn't crazy about it all or anything."
"The human mind is unpredictable. It is indeed possible that you have seen another woman who is very similar to Pepper," Quentin shrugged. "But it's quite possible you may be right."
"Oh yeah, if you could evoke memories or something... I just wander from conjecture to conjecture like this and I'm very exhausted. I would like to be wrong. Then I could forget about everything and finally go to my mom. Go to Pepper," he corrected himself, but... it sounded strange. Pepper was his mom. "Everything would be easier then. And especially now when she's pregnant. And that's another problem."
Beck's eyebrows rose and the man's eyes widened. "Pepper is pregnant?"
"Yeah, I learned that only two days ago and I was so affected by that, that I had to cancel a meeting with Mary. Which somehow didn't bother me too much. But when I was locked in my room, I was wondering if the baby was Dad's or not, and what it would be like if she lived normally with us. I'd love to have siblings, sir. And it would be best if she was a girl," Peter dreamed, and a smile unknowingly appeared on his face. "We would be family and everything would be great. But like this... I don't know what to do. There's nothing I can do! If I asked my mom about it, of course, she could deny it. Dad doesn't believe me, not even Nat. But I just... I don't know. Oh God, I wish I didn't hear anything. Why does everything have to go to hell? Why do I have to have stupid superpowers? I don't want them. I want to be normal and I want to have a complete family." Peter was really desperate and had to hold on to keep from crying again. "I'm sorry. How are you?"
Beck blinked a few times, but then laughed. "We don't have to talk about me, Peter. But I'm fine, thank you for asking. In fact, I don't even remember the last time anyone asked me about this, and he was genuinely interested."
"I'm sorry, I'm talking only about myself..."
"You have no one else to confide in, and I don't mind at all. I'm glad you trust me," he told him with a smile, and Peter had no choice but to return the smile.
•••
"Hi, kid. How was school? Would you take a moment for me? I have a surprise for you," Tony said as he peered into his son's room and found him lying on the bed reading. Peter was ashamed. He hadn't been very shared with him for the last few days, and he'd made it harder for him, and now he would tell him that he had a surprise for him.
"You don't have to give me anything, Dad," Peter said cautiously, but he got up and walked with his father to the workshop. They were quiet for a while, and there was a slight tension between them.
"Yeah? I'm so glad to hear that," Tony said, smiling at him. Peter returned the smile faintly. "Anyway... I've been working on this for a while. It's about your suit."
"Did you make me a new one?" he asked, stunned.
"Yes, I thought it would want something better. Come on, I am wondering what you'll say," he said enthusiastically and hurried downstairs. Peter followed curiously. "Friday? Start the show."
"As you wish, sir," the robotic voice replied. The door slid aside and a brand new suit appeared in front of Peter.
"Wow," he breathed.
"I'm honored to introduce you to the Iron Spider," Tony said contentedly, enjoying his son's reaction. "This one is much better than the one you had before. And beware, of course, it's also from nanotechnology."
"That's brilliant," Peter breathed, looking at him enthusiastically. "Thanks, Dad. It's a shame I can only use it around here."
"Would you rather fight some alien monsters?"
"I'd like to try it," Peter grinned, and for a moment it was the same between them again.
"Well, as far as I know, there's no action coming up yet, and I don't want to wake up the Hulk either," Tony grinned, and Peter chuckled. "Listen, we haven't had much time for each other lately. What if we went to dinner sometimes? It doesn't have to be on the weekend, but just... sometimes. But not in half a year either."
"Just the two of us?" Peter asked.
"We could take Bruce and Natasha. And-"
"And Pepper?" he interrupted softly, his heart pounding. He was excited at the thought, but on the other hand, his stomach tightened at the fact that he should see her. He probably wasn't ready for that yet... For God's sake, since when did he have to prepare to meet his mom?
"Well, if you want," Tony replied cautiously, but Peter knew he hoped he would agree. He closed his eyes.
"I don't know, Dad.I don't know myself," he whispered fearfully, and all of a sudden it all came upon him. He was overwhelmed by indescribable anxiety. He really didn't know what to do. Too many things have happened. His head was crowded to bursting. Peter was afraid that one day it wouldn't last and...
"I'm completely lost." He was lost in the dark, searching for himself. And he needed Tony and Pepper to stand by his side.