4
4
Thursday night Peter didn’t bother touching the suit. He couldn’t bring himself to sneak out and swing around New York – the energy to do so was nonexistent and his morale was experiencing a sharp decline. With an empty stomach and the constant badgering of his spidersense, Peter wasn’t as much Peter as he was a husk of Peter. Laying in bed that night, untouched homework sprawled out on his desk and mask clutched in hand, he realized he hadn’t been out much at all in the past week. At first when everything with Beck came crashing down, Peter surged in his Spider-manning. But last weekend the rush to get out of the apartment had flittered out into only escapades lasting an hour.
He hated it, but at the same time he just couldn’t bring himself to put on the mask.
At school, Ned noticed how drained he was. He tried to pry into it but Peter’s Guy in the Chair lacked the skills of MJ, namely intimidation. Peter blew any accusations from Ned off – he put too much energy into the science fair, he was stressed for next week’s algebra test, he didn’t get enough sleep.
Friday managed to pour some life into Peter’s soul. He was excited to go to the lab, even if he had to come home by 8:30 thanks to a new random rule established by Beck. Usually he stayed until 10 or 11 and of course he was mad about it but he didn’t want to draw attention to the problem, so after arriving at the Compound he casually said to Tony: “Guess you aren’t the only one who likes to set up curfews.”
Tony flashed him a quizzical look. They were gearing up to take apart an old Iron Man suit just for kicks. Tony had noticed way Peter looked defeated today and decided they’d take it easy in the lab.
“I’ve gotta be home by 8:30.”
“Are you a nine-year-old?” Tony remarked and Peter was content with the unspoken agreement that this curfew was stupid.
“Apparently,” Peter huffed, trying not to dwell on it. He wasn’t going to let Beck ruin his time with Tony.
Peter just wanted to play it cool, let the topic of the time sanction slip into the past. Tony on the other hand oddly wasn’t playing it cool. Peter could easily see how bothered Tony was about how a teenager was sentenced to an 8:30 bedtime on a weekend. The words ‘how fucking bizarre’ were on the tip of Tony’s tongue.
“It’s no biggie,” Peter offered. “I think he just wants to make sure I’m getting school work done.”
Truthfully, Beck had offered no reason to the time constraint and Peter didn’t risk questioning it. Tony looked at Peter for a moment, scanning his face, assessing him the habitual way he always did. A million things to say rolled through his brain but instead of telling Peter he was too smart to need to worry about school work or that he frankly didn’t like Beck, Tony just settled on saying:
“We’ll just have to eat dinner early then.” And there was no further comment on the topic.
Peter felt alive at the thought of having a meal where he could overeat to his heart’s content. Tony tended to take on the classic grandmother role, always trying to force seconds onto Peter’s plate.
They worked in the lab for an hour or two. Tony’s work playlist pumped rock music through the workspace, conversations occasionally taking over the sound.
“So are you excited for Sunday?” Tony asked at some point.
“Sunday?” Peter said, taking a screwdriver to the arm of the Iron Man suit, prying the plating apart.
Tony paused what he was doing, flicking a quick glance at the kid. “Your birthday?” He said, somewhat alarmed by the apparent memory loss. It certainly took an uncomfortable beat of time to pass before the words registered in Peter’s brain. “You know? Sweet 16 and all that junk? Magic webs and cake and presents.” Tony waved his hand around as if the action would jumpstart Peter.
“Did you just admit to getting me magic webs?” Peter asked, ignoring the tremble behind his ribs at the realization he’d nearly forgotten his own birthday. Somehow the excitement for the day wasn’t there anymore.
“That’s never happening,” Tony said, reluctantly letting the moment go on as if nothing weird had happened.
“I know you hate surprises so I’m going to do the right thing and let you know that Caroline is having a surprise birthday dinner for you,” Tony said.
Peter lifted an eyebrow, “And you know this because?”
“I’m invited. So is Ned and your scary friend,” Tony said.
Peter felt a smile spreading on his face.
“Thanks for the heads up.” He laughed. It’s true that he didn’t fancy surprises. Mostly because he was terrible at reacting. One time Ben tried to surprise him with tickets for Disneyland and all Peter could manage to say was “okay” because his brain needed to prepare for what Disneyland actually entailed.
Tony hated surprises too. He called them the bad jump scares of real life.
They fell back into tinkering and worked until 6:00, the earliest they had ever closed shop. All Peter could do was appreciate that Tony didn’t resurrect the conversation of the untimely curfew. Instead, Tony cooked dinner – a mediocre first attempt at stir fry – and gave his review on the Star Wars prequels.
“I can’t believe you watched without me,” Peter laughed through a bite of veggies.
Tony was leaning against the sink holding his plate while Peter was on his usual perch at the kitchen island. He might as well have his named carved into the bar stool. Everything happens in that spot – joking around while Tony tries to cook, getting lectured for questionable Spider-manning choices, homework help, the list goes on.
“Pep’s still out of town and you’re only here on the weekends,” Tony shrugged, “How else was I supposed to stay entertained?”
“Don’t you run a company?” Peter questioned. He was feeling happy, a warm feeling taking over his chest.
Tony shook his head with a sharp smile, “That’s what Pepper’s for.”
“Okay, firstly, she’d end you if she heard you say that. And secondly, you just spend your time watching bad trilogies by yourself?” Peter said, a cheeky grin slapped on his face.
“Contrary to popular belief, instead of manning Stark Industries, I’m usually busy keeping an eye on a certain Spider-kid.”
Peter laughed a little, thinking about the truth behind the words. Tony’s hands were constantly full, juggling between the vigilantism of Spider-Man and the mundane events of Peter Parker’s life. He never understood how Tony put up with it.
Tony set down his plate to grab the pan of stir fry off the stove to push some more onto Peter’s plate.
“And I’ve happened to have some extra free time this week since you haven’t been punching in your usual hours.” He left the statement open, an invitation for Peter to comment.
Something suddenly struck Peter’s nerves. He hadn’t even considered this conversation happening. He should’ve expected it – Tony’s always monitoring the time he puts into the suit. It’s typical of him to work overtime protecting Queens.
“School’s been getting hectic,” Peter lied, wishing it was the truth.
*
Saturday came and went. Peter tried to put some time in the suit for Tony’s sake. He never liked knowing Tony was worrying about him. At the same time however, he relished in Tony’s worry. It’s always how he knew Tony cared.
That night when Peter crawled back in through his window, he tucked himself into bed and thought about the birthday dinner awaiting him tomorrow. He felt like something big was going to happen. Putting Beck, Caroline, Ned, MJ, and Tony in a room together seemed like a recipe for some grand event. Peter couldn’t help imagining Ned enacting MJ to sleuth out the apartment to figure out how life was inside of it. He couldn’t stop picturing MJ cracking the code and reporting everything to Ned who would then deliver the information to Tony like a responsible kid should. He couldn’t help imagining Tony stepping foot in the apartment and immediately stepping right back out, taking Peter with him.
*
The dinner was ten times more enjoyable than Peter expected it to be. Caroline had put together cute decorations that May would have approved of. The tense atmosphere usually consuming the home felt a little more relaxed. There was a slight comfort in the air. Maybe it was because Ned kept making him laugh, maybe it was how he couldn’t stop thinking about how cute MJ looked with a striped party hat on, or maybe it was that Tony was here and Beck was missing, apparently caught up at work… on a Sunday.
They were all gathered around the kitchen table. Caroline set a cake down in front of Peter after finishing her tenth attempt at calling Beck to come home and Peter could care less if the man made or not. MJ and Ned took a stance on either side of him. Across from him, Tony was at the ready with a lighter.
Taking in the scene around him, Peter decided it was the happiest moment he’d ever have in the apartment. He looked at Caroline’s face, longing for it to be May’s soft smile and kind eyes, and he wished Ben was with him at the table. But having Tony, Ned, and MJ there was enough.
“Blow these candles out before the frosting turns into wax,” Tony said.
Peter’s eyes fell to the cake, realizing it was all lit up. The last notes of Happy Birthday still chimed in the air. If things were normal, Peter would grin ear to ear and blow the candles out without any thought at all. As much as he joked about it, he had never really believed in making wishes on candles. But this time he focused on the 16 flickering flames and conjured up a wish he’d been trying to deny he wanted for a while.
He felt Tony’s hand fall onto his shoulder – a congratulations for making it to the big 1-6 and that warm feeling spread in his chest again. He pulled in a breath.
I wish I lived with Tony.
And blew out the candles.
The rest of the evening flew by. Ned and MJ left around 8:00 and 10 minutes later Tony was reading to leave just as Beck arrived. The atmosphere immediately stiffened. Peter’s heartbeat uncomfortably picked up speed as his spidersense prodded at his nerves.
Beck greeted Tony with a gruff “hello”, gave Caroline a kiss on the cheek, and told Peter a loose happy birthday before slipping out of sight into the hallway. He seemed exhausted and Peter was sure that would be the excuse Caroline would settle on later. Peter pushed Beck out of his mind. He locked his attention onto Tony standing in the door frame instead.
“I’ll see you Friday, kid,” Tony said, tousling Peter’s hair with a rough hand.
Peter smiled at him and suddenly he was choking on a lump in his throat. He couldn’t bear to see Tony go even though he’d see him again in a couple days.
In classic Peter Parker fashion, Peter lurched forward and grabbed Tony in a hug. It was normal for Peter to give out hugs, but this time he gripped Tony tighter than he ever had before. Half his mind worried that he’d crack one of Tony’s ribs and the other half worried about Tony disappearing.
Tony was still adapting to the consistent hugs from Peter. He never felt prepared to hug anybody, but he never failed to wrap his arms around the kid’s shoulders, securing him in a warm hold.
Peter didn’t realize how strongly he had secretly hoped when Tony came over, he would have sleuthed everything out. He’d have taken one look at Beck and everything that’s happened in the apartment would be exposed. And then he’d rush Peter right out of there.
In reality, Tony was leaving without him. Because the idea of leaving with Tony was just a fantasy – a hopeless figment of the imagination, a wish on 16 sticks of wax.
Tony gave Peter a squeeze before letting go.
“C’mon kid, you’ll manage without me,” He joked softly, making Peter’s heart fall apart in his chest.
“I just think you’re hug deprived,” Peter said in as casual a tone as he could manage, wrangling his breath to keep it steady.
The second Tony was gone, the humble atmosphere of the evening was sucked away. Peter went to bed after giving Caroline a big thank you and bidding a bitter goodnight to Beck.
Safe in bed, the heaviness of his wish pressed down on his chest and he couldn’t help but cry.