Chapter 23
2015, date redacted
"Okay, so anyone else going to reveal any secret relationships or kids?" Tony says.
Natasha knows Tony is probably somewhat hurt but understands. Natasha couldn't be bothered right now, to hell with her deadly assassin spy cover. Maria was here, Maria, who had not run away from her, who knew her the best, better than herself, who she trusted with her own life.
Maria, who was currently feeding her bits and pieces of pasta as Natasha clung onto her like she was a lifeline. Maria is, her life, her light. If she had died, if she killed Maria...
Natasha barely represses a shudder and Maria, as if sensing, fixes her pretty ocean blue eyes onto her, grip on Natasha tightening in comfort.
Natasha's only slightly listening to Fury, but she's got the general gist of it. Nick, for once, had no contacts, no information for them. This was a rallying, one that fell pretty flat. Hey, Maria and Natasha's relationship or Clint's and Laura's were probably the highlights.
"Ultron, he's not rebuilding, he's evolving," Bruce suddenly says, fingering at the picture Lila drew Natasha.
"Has anyone been in contact with Helen Cho?" He asks, and the room is silent.
"We fly out tomorrow," Steve decides, and they eat their dinner in silence, heading to their respective sleep venues.
2015, date redacted
Maria carries Natasha bridal style to their room. Well, Yelena's. Galina was sharing with Yelena and they were staying in Yelena's to allow space for the other Avengers as there was only one guest room with two beds. Thor would be sleeping on the couch and Steve would be sleeping on a mattress Clint had found.
Thank god the girls had demanded for large beds.
Maria lays Natasha onto the bed as she helps Natasha undress. Its methodical, stress relieving. Natasha lets her, and just stares at Maria, like she was etching her into her memory, her mind.
Maria quickly strips down and crawls in beside Natasha.
"Nat, talk to me sweetie," Maria murmurs, caressing her girlfriend's cheek, jaw, down her body and up again.
Natasha inhales and exhales deeply.
"I thought I had killed Yelena and made you watch. I broke Galina to fit her into the mantle of Black Widow. I made you three-"
"Nat," Maria states, and guides her to look into her eyes.
It's okay. I'm here. I love you, you didn't do any of that.
"It's okay," Maria exhales shakily.
Look at me, I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you.
"Nat," Maria warns, hands stilling on Natasha.
I nearly killed you so many times, I've brought down regimes and entire organisations within days. I'm not worthy.
Maria's eyes flash with something dangerous.
"Don't you dare Natasha Romanoff," she hisses.
"You're not a monster. You are a hero, Nat. You're trying to atone for your past, for Natalia, for a young little girl who was destroyed and mutilated and violated. It's a good thing, but you are Natasha Romanoff. You're the dork who loves to play with the kids, who sees the good in everyone, who's soul shines brighter than anything, anything in the universe. You are loved, respected, valued Nat. You're my girlfriend. I see you, I see your light, your flame. You are a living legend Natasha, and I'm not talking about the Black Widow of legends. You make me happier. I breathe when I'm with you. You and Clint are the glue to hold the Avengers together. The world needs you to save them, Natasha. They know you can. I know you can. I need you, Nat. I will never, ever, let you go down the path of darkness."
"And if I do?"
"I will be your light back to the sun, I swear."
Natasha stares into Maria's eyes. Ocean blue eyes, swirling with emotion.
"Eyes are the key to someone's soul," Natasha absentmindedly murmurs, hands coming up to brush Maria's hair to the side.
Maria stares back. Into the depths of those emerald, light moss green eyes. Sparkling, shining, like the woman she loved.
"You want proof, Natasha? I'll give you proof," Maria suddenly sits up and leads Natasha to the living room.
"Masha," she whispers.
Maria leads her right in front of Mjolnir, on the floor.
"Pick it up," she simply says.
"Maria, I can't, please-" Natasha begs.
It was unfair to let her so close, so so close to the prize and yet not be able to lift it. Like bringing a toy to a cat and taking it away right as it was about to catch it.
"Pick it up, I know you can Nat," Maria says, and slides her fingers between Natasha's.
Natasha brings her tear filled eyes to Maria's.
"Masha-"
'You are worthy, Natasha Romanoff. Everyone in this farm knows it. Except you, since you doubt yourself so much."
Natasha closes her eyes.
"Nat. Open your eyes. Look at me."
Natasha complies, and finds Maria a few centimetres away from her face, arms around her waist, swaying them gently.
"I love you, Nat. No matter what. I'd reach through your fire even if it makes my frost die," Maria smiles, and Natasha nods, closes that distance between their lips.
There's tears falling, she knows from the salty taste.
They break apart.
"Okay," Natasha agrees.
"Okay, Natasha Romanoff, you can do this," she breathes out, rolling her shoulders back.
Natasha holds the handle of Mjolnir and lifts.