Chapter 14
2013, date redacted
Maria's settled into her job now. It's literally almost like her old one except less shooting people and more diplomacy and politics talk with more old men or hags who don't know more than money and their ego.
Maria sips her fancy cocktail. Tony's bar was really coming in handy. She could hear the Avengers playing Pie Face in the communal room, her and Rhodey staring at those children high on sugar and alcohol.
She liked Rhodey, didn't know how he and Pepper dealed with Tony for this long.
Stark was a man-child. The rest of the Avengers were not so far off, with Steve and Thor as overexcited dogs, Clint and Sam (who finally came for a visit and was cheering Steve on) were literal birds and Nat, well, Nat was still her cat. Literally, she was sprawled out on the sofa and observing the others get a face of whip cream. Bruce was up next.
Pepper, sadly, was overseas dealing with some financial transaction related problem.
"Looks like you and I are the only sane ones left, Colonel," Maria sighs as the team Bruce is on, Tony's and Steve's yells in victory for the round.
"Avengers are crazy, they're lucky to have us normal humans," Rhodey replies in a conspirator's whisper.
"Sometimes I feel like Nick only formed the Avengers for his adopted murderchild Natasha to make friends besides Clint."
"Seriously though, did Director Fury adopt Natasha or."
"I don't think so. Huh, I'm actually not sure," Maria muses.
"What are the odds that they're going to break that Pie Face machine in one week."
"I'd say three days if they continue playing until 2am, maybe four days at most."
"We should bet Tones on that, he runs so many bets and loses most of them."
'If you do, I'm in. We'll get a good deal and split half-half. Bonus to Wilson if he agrees to join in and purposely goad someone to break the machine."
"Deal," Rhodey chuckles as there's a scream of absolute sorrow so loud that Maria and Rhodey actually look over.
It's Tony, staring in absolute horror as they realise they have no more whipped cream and the final points are standing in favour of the team of Clint, Sam and Natasha who did nothing but steal sips of wine from everyone's glasses.
"Hey, Stark, need a hand?" Maria calls out, winking at Rhodey.
"Ah, Eye-Candy Hill! Come join us and help us destroy them with your feminine grace!" Tony says.
"I meant if you need a hand to find your dignity, but yes, I am full of feminine grace, as you put it."
"You wound me. Are you and Vodka Aunt over there trying to gang up on me?"
Natasha meets Maria's gaze over the couch and she blinks.
"Yeah, don't be surprised if you use the Iron Man suit and find rats in there," Natasha mildly threatens.
"Woah, chill there Little Miss Gay Spider."
"Stark, lets make a bet," Maria declares.
"Ooh, knew you were fun in there besides all the darkness and despair Hill. Shoot."
"I bet you couldn't dance. I'm pooling in twenty bucks, Nat?" Maria looks at Natasha.
"Thirty," Natasha says mischievously, twinkle in her eye.
"I'm putting in ten, not everyone is rich here," Rhodey declares.
"Please Rhodey, you're a literal Colonel. I put down twenty," Clint says.
"Well, Metal Man over here seems like he can't dance well, so its a thirty for me."
They all look at Steve and Bruce.
"Twenty five," Steve finally says.
"I'm going with fifteen," Bruce shrugs.
Tony laughs.
"You're all going to have to pay me soon, but we'll need a judge."
"I'd say JARVIS, since he can search up the internet the scoring system and how real dancers do it," Sam suggests.
'JARVIS buddy, you got my back, right?"
"You're back is alright at the moment, a little stiff from the sitting down though," JARVIS replies, sounding like he was actually being sarcastic.
"Traitor, who knew an AI system could be so disloyal."
"You built JARVIS, Tony, now get on with the dancing, or are you scared?" Clint goads.
"Are you recording this?" Rhodey whispers.
'Definitely," Maria agrees, tapping her watch that also served as a holographic tablet.
Tony starts dancing and Maria nearly shatters her glass from nearly dropping it.
"I can't watch, I'm out of here, give me my share of money later," Rhodey declares and leaves.
Maria moves to the couch beside Natasha and Natasha subtly shifts herself closer to Maria, Maria opening up a bit.
"Whatever is Stark going to say when he finds out I used to dance," Natasha whispers and Maria laughs so hard she nearly snorts.
Tony finishes his weird cowboy-tango dance in a bow, tipping his imaginary bowler hat as he takes in the scene of the Avengers dissolving into laughter.
Maria's using this as an excuse to laugh-wheeze into Natasha's shoulder as Natasha just openly stares in disbelief at Tony.
Just a night of Avengers bonding time. Gods, they should be on a reality tv show. Or at least Ellen, she was a gay legend and Natasha and Maria stanned her. Or Jimmy Fallon. That would be cool.