My World's On Fire, How About Yours?

Before Maria can even start to process anything’s that’s going on, Romanoff’s body violently collides with hers. Romanoff shoots at her like a rocket, her arms wrapping under her armpits and around her chest.

In the air, Maria can feel her skin becoming hot. And not from the arms wrapped around her. Small pieces of the house slice through her skin, grazing her face and arms.

They fly as a tangled mess onto the ground, their short freefall ending with Maria being slammed onto the concrete walkway so hard the air is knocked completely out of her. Her body skids on the concrete, scrapping off some of her skin. Her head takes the worst of it, hitting the ground so hard that her vision is blurry. The explosion blows out her ears too. The only thing she can hear is the sound of her own blood rushing and heart pumping.

Without sight or hearing, her other senses begin to kick into overdrive. Like how she can smell the smoke and feel the cuts on her body.

Or how her face is buried in Romanoff’s hair and she can smell that apple and cinnamon. And she can feel the way Romanoff still has her arms wrapped around her, holding tight still. They’re so close, with Romanoff on top of her, that she can feel every breath she takes. The way her chest is rapidly rising and falling against her own. That hot breath that is currently ghosting her neck where Romanoff’s head is currently buried.

As the smoke billows around them, they stay intertwined on the ground. Panting and frozen.

Maria could’ve killed them. If Romanoff hadn’t pushed them out of the way of the explosion, they would’ve been in pieces along with the house. Shit, Maria was so close to opening that door and leaving when they first got there. She would’ve killed Romanoff instantly. What the fuck is up with Maria and crumbling buildings?

Maria doesn’t even understand why the house was rigged to explode in the first place. Wouldn’t the skrull also have died if the door was opened? How could they have predicted that Romanoff would shoot the skrull?

The muffled pain in Maria’s head forces her to stop thinking about it.

Romanoff starts to tremble on top of her. Fuck, she probably took most of the brunt of the explosion, separating Maria off from the blast. Acting on instinct, Maria moves her arms from the ground and wraps them around her. She traces her hand gently across her back. She can feel the holes littering her jacket and her hand becomes wet with blood. Her fingertips graze over a particularly large piece of something sticking out of her skin. Maria clenches her fingers around it and pulls.

She can’t hear Romanoff cry out, but she can feel the way her lips move against her neck.

Maria cups her hands around her wound, trying to apply light pressure. Every time she presses down on her back, she can feel Romanoff scrunch up her face, burrowing deeper into her neck.

Romanoff starts moving her lips more, to the point where Maria can start to hear muffled words. But she can’t understand what’s being said to her.

Suddenly, Maria can feel Romanoff’s arms sliding out from under her as she pushes herself off her body. Romanoff looks down at her and her lips open once more to make words, but Maria can’t hear them.

“Hill!” Romanoff faintly shouts. “Hill, can you get up?”

“I think so.” Maria mumbles and moves her arms from Romanoff to the ground. She pushes her upper back off the ground and looks back up at Romanoff.

“We need to go now, before any firefighters or police show up.” Romanoff fully stands up and bends back down to offer a hand to Maria. Maria gladly takes it.

“Do we need to get another car?” Maria groans, picking out pieces of wood—also some shards of glass—out of her arms.

“I think the car was fine since we parked on the street.” Sure enough, there the car stands perfectly fine. Maria’s never been more jealous of an inanimate object than now. She really wishes she could’ve just waited in the damn car. It’s like that shiny car is mocking her. How badly did she knock her head if she’s holding a grudge with a car? She better not have a damn concussion again.

“Are you okay to drive?” Romanoff asks, reading Maria’s thoughts again.

“I can manage.” Maria replies. Because she really is fine. She’s driven in worse conditions.

“Well then let’s go.” Romanoff makes her way to the car and Maria follows after. She looks back at the smoking pile of rubble behind them one last time before she slips into the car. Blowing up a house is one way to announce that they’re back on Earth.

“Do you know where we’re going?” Romanoff asks, lowering her seat back to grab a towel in the back of the car.

“Yeah, Pepper texted me the address of Parker’s school. He has some club or something after school, so he should be getting out around 1700. Which should give us just enough time to drive to New York. Hopefully the skrulls don’t pull him out of class early.” Maria starts up the car and they begin their drive.

“If they wanted to cause a scene, they would’ve done so earlier. I think they’re trying to be subtle. I mean they set up whole elaborate plots to pretend to be us. I mean did you see that house, they even had photo shopped pictures. They wouldn’t spend that long setting something up just to destroy it.”

Maria hums in agreeance as she watches a firetruck speed past them. If they would’ve left a few minutes later, things would’ve been a lot messier.

“They’re getting messier though. They kept us locked up for years without a single attempt on our lives. They could’ve quickly killed us yet they didn’t. But that all went away when we escaped. I mean they shot at us in space; that’s a clear sign that they aren’t going to let us stay alive anymore.”

“They definitely were aiming for us in space, but we don’t know if the blast was even made for us. It could’ve been a protective measure in case anyone came looking too closely at the Steve skrull.” Romanoff counters. “I doubt they were able to install that in only a few days.”

“Which would mean the skrulls were trying to hide something in that house. So have you found anything in those papers?” They were able to save most of the papers they grabbed from the house. Romanoff was holding the backpack they filled in her hands when she grabbed Maria so they were facing away from the blast.

“Nothing out of the ordinary yet. It’s mostly just mundane things like bills and shit like that. I think they went pretty far into this cover story. I’m almost impressed.” Romanoff holds up a piece of paper and Maria glances at it quickly through the side of her eye. “I mean look at this. It’s a tax form from the 80s. They were really trying to make this cover stick.”

Maria groans. “We have nothing on these guys. We don’t even know why they took us. They didn’t take us to destroy Earth. And they left important people here. Why didn’t they take Tony? Why not Thor? They just took you and then Rogers. It doesn’t make sense.”

“Well maybe they couldn’t find Steve when they took me. He was all over the place and I was more localized. I had more of a set pattern and most people knew about my whereabouts.”

“That would be a first.” Maria grunts in a half formed laugh.

Natasha frowns at her. “What’s that’s supposed to mean?”

“Are you trying to tell me that the poster child for spies and secret lives was suddenly out in the open for all to see?”

Romanoff’s left ear begins to twitch and her nostrils start doing the bunny flair thing they do whenever Maria hits a nerve.

“Well someone needed to be the face.” Natasha spits off at her, her voice rising every word she hisses out. “Clint took off. Thor’s entire planet was no more, so he was a little too occupied to do it. Most of S.H.I.E.L.D was gone. Banner went to do his own thing. Tony withdrew from the spotlight to be with Pepper more since he lost Peter. Steve lost Bucky and Sam, so he left. So yeah. I stepped up because no one else could. And I tried my damn fucking hardest to be there for every single person on this damn Earth. You’re right, that goes against everything I was trained to do but I was trying. I was trying to be the fucking hero everyone needed. I went against every single instinct in my body to try and make things better for other people. So kindly fuck off.” If Romanoff could leave the car right now, Maria is sure that she would’ve slammed the door on her already.

The thing is, it’s hard to pick and choose what pieces to put together. Maria has pieces of Romanoff, pieces of Natasha, and pieces of Natalie. And until now, she’s been trying her hardest to keep them separate. And so far that’s been working, because they really are different people. And it confuses her when they bleed together. When she looks at Romanoff and sees Natasha or Natalie or both.

Because this thing Romanoff is telling her right now is what Natalie did. Natalie described to her how she was left alone from everyone in her life and had to hold up a mask for people who needed it more. How she would drown herself so that other people could float.

Because Romanoff doesn’t do that. Romanoff leaves for months on end with radio silence. Romanoff declares that everything should be on the down low. Everything needs to be a secret. Romanoff never gives up any information or emotions. Romanoff has a secret apartment that she never showed Maria in the entire decade they knew each other. This is the person that just disappears at the drop of hat. The person who doesn’t even make noise when she walks. Who disappeared for two whole years and formed a new life, shedding her old one like it was nothing. Because it probably was nothing, just another act by the world famous, 15 time Oscar winner Natasha Romanoff. The Romanoff that just leaves, and everyone else be damned. She’s so good at running that it’s impossible to chase her because hoping to catch her is like trying to catch water with a broken bucket; it just slips through the cracks.

Out of all the things to combine, how can Maria combine those two people? Loyal, strong Natalie is not flakey, skittish Romanoff. Because if she starts to combine those two aspects that are completely different, that means she’ll have to combine other parts as well. And she can’t. She won’t.

So Maria just stays silent as well. She really doesn’t feel like arguing right now, especially since her head is still throbbing from being shoved onto the ground. Maybe the two years after the Decimation are off limits for what they talk about. It’s too much of a Twilight Zone situation for Maria.

Romanoff looks ready to smack her if she says anything even questioning what she just said and Maria can’t agree with her, so she decides to just drop it for now.

Maria will take this time to focus on driving instead. Driving always calms her. She’s in control. Literally. If she wants to go right, she turns the wheel right and the car follows. She’s damn good at driving too. She likes to roll the windows down and feel the wind blowing through her hair. The screams of the wind blowing next to her ears.

It’s easy to focus on. Checking all the mirrors, looking at the road in front of her, looking at the sides. Everything takes her attention. She doesn’t get distracted. A phone pinging on the console next to her doesn’t draw her attention. She has no need to do a million things at once while trying to drive. The most she’ll do is listen to faint music in the background.

Cars meant freedom. Her father never owned a car. Not after his license was taken away when he crashed the one time when she was six. She has the long scar on her hip as a reminder.

The only cars she remembers riding in were the ones she built with Betty, the old woman who taught her how to be a mechanic.

Of course living on the Helicarrier and then in New York City doesn’t exactly give her a way to own any cars. She’s a subway girl now. That was fine with her, she could get her fix from working with Stark. Tinkering with stuff wasn’t something she was granted in the air. If something didn’t work out, it wouldn’t be great to learn about that miles away from the Earth’s surface.

They pass another Iron Man billboard. Maria peels her eyes off of it. While Romanoff may not have been able to do anything about it, Maria was there that day. She was in New York City even. If she found a car earlier or was able to negotiate with the skrulls, maybe she could’ve gotten away. She could’ve been at that fight.

Instead she got shot and captured. She was fucking useless. She ended up in the same place she would’ve been even if she did nothing to resist. Except her right side was blown to bits. So she accomplished even less than nothing. She did worse good than doing nothing would’ve done.

Hell, maybe if she would’ve just let them take Fury, she could’ve stayed there. They weren’t interested in her until after she started to argue and shoot at them. I mean Fury didn’t seem to mind going with them, he’s even still with them.

She could’ve just stayed down like he was trying to tell her. Of course Fury was right, he’s always right. Maria likes to pretend she can do what he does, understand the same things he does, but he’s way above her level. He’s untouchable. She’ll never reach him. The way people’s eyes glint with respect for the man whenever they mention his name will never happen for her.

Anyone who says her name says it with distain. It’s never in a good context to hear her name. Even if it’s good things to say, it’s met with resistance. Like they don’t want to admit she did well. The tone of voice is them saying that one good call doesn’t make her a good agent or leader. She just happened to get lucky once.

And they’re probably right.

The whole Deputy Director thing is bullshit. She’ll never be Director, not that she was ever hoping anything would ever happen to Fury, but she’d hoped it meant people seeing her on the same level. But that’s impossible.

Even if she were there during the last fight against Thanos, what good would she have done? All she seems to do now is order people around. What good are a few words against Thanos?

So while hers and Romanoff’s situations are similar that neither of them could’ve saved Stark, they are not the same. As much as Maria hates it, people respect Romanoff. They trust her to get the job done. If she were in the same position as Maria and could’ve safely been at the fight against Thanos, she could’ve helped.

She would’ve been able to save Stark. She would’ve caused a difference.

Meanwhile here Maria is, on Earth without Fury. That should make her the Director now. But she doesn’t feel like the Director. She’s done nothing to prove her leadership. She’s just driving all over the place with Romanoff.

With Maria’s head firing thoughts every second, her fingers start to tap and bang on the center console. She doesn’t notice the feeling or the tapping noise until Romanoff grabs her hand and holds it still.

“Can you stop?” Romanoff mutters. “I’m trying to read these papers and you’re being annoying.”

Maria frowns. “I’m so sorry my fingers have rendered you unable to read.”

She doesn’t see the second meaning to that until Romanoff smirks at her. “Please, if your fingers were causing me to stop focusing on something then I don’t think I’d be telling you to stop.” See, Romanoff always manages to do this. She has no problem bringing up things of their past. And why should she? It’s not like it affected her at all. She said it herself a million times in a million different ways: Maria was never an important person in her life.

Fuck Romanoff and her stupid jokes. “Then quit messing with my hand and start reading those damn papers again. I need to figure out what our next move should be. We can’t even get what’s left of the Avengers together because everyone is so broken up and scattered in too many different places. And I don’t think we can pull this off alone.”

“Oh, I already have that covered.” Romanoff offhandedly says, like Maria hasn’t been racking her brain on what to do next for the past day. Fuck, why can’t she just say what she’s thinking for once in her damn life? How can someone live being this cryptic at all times?

“Mind sharing with the class?” Maria asks, grinding her teeth together. Romanoff has been nothing but a nuisance this entire car ride. She would give anything in the world just to leave her on the side of the road somewhere.

“No, I don’t think I will.” Romanoff smiles and leans her chair back. If she thinks for one second Maria will let her put her dirty feet up on the dash, that will be the last straw. Luckily for Romanoff, her feet remain on the ground, so Maria’s last bit on sanity can remain tethered to the ground as well.

“I need to know what you’re planning so I can think of other plans. I need to know every step to make sure there are backup plans. What to do if things don’t work out perfectly. Because things haven’t exactly been going smoothly since we’ve been back.” Maria points out. She can feel her eye starting to twitch out of frustration.

Romanoff scoffs. “You don’t need to be in charge of everything. And I don’t need shitty backup plans because I have a fool proof plan. Quality over quantity, Hill.”

“It’s literally my job to be in charge of everything!” Maria argues. “With Fury gone, I’m the acting Director of S.H.I.E.L.D and people are depending on me to do my job. Fuck, the entire universe can be resting on one single decision!”

“Stop being so overdramatic all the time. First off, S.H.I.E.L.D doesn’t even exist anymore, Hill, let it go. And second off, no one is expecting you to be Fury. There is not a single person right now who is looking at you and hanging on your every word. Give it a rest.”

Maria knows S.H.I.E.L.D isn’t what it used to be and technically it’s not around anymore. But everyone knows that on the down low, the important parts of S.H.I.E.L.D are still operating. Someone has to keep these Avengers in check, I mean they almost destroyed everything when they were fighting. They don’t tend to see their real world consequences well.

The Avengers are filled with superheroes and mutants with powers, they need real people to tether them back down to Earth and remind them that they’re not the only damn people in the universe. Maria may have worked for SI after S.H.I.E.L.D fell, but that didn’t mean she ever stopped working for Fury or working to try and keep what little peace the world had.

And Romanoff knows this. She would come to their base every so often before the Accords. She even helped work with her and Fury when they were trying to devise a strategy on what to do about the Accords and the fracturing Avengers.

They were working smoothly together; Romanoff had firsthand knowledge about Roger’s and Stark’s feelings about what needed to be done, and Maria was talking with Stark and Pepper about all this, along with the leaders of the governments. And then of course Fury seemed to be in the loop with everyone at every time.

And they all agreed that the best thing they could do was sign the Accords and then hash things out later. Maria was very convincing when she wanted to be and she was sure she could begin renegotiating rules of the terms to where they would have most of their freedom back. The Accords wouldn’t restrict anything and serve solely as a reminder to watch their damages since everyone else has to clean up the rubble.

Besides, the Accords did have a point. Although of course the destruction was done in order to save people’s lives, some of it could’ve been helped. The Avengers were starting to become sloppy. They were relying too much on their powers and reputations. They were drifting apart from reality.

Crafting and weaving intricate points into how they were going to make this work, Romanoff and Maria worked seamlessly together for once in their lives. And shit, that teamwork even started to spill into their personal lives.

Things were starting to build back up again, even after everything that happened with Banner just one year prior. They could be alone without Maria’s strong urge to kick or punch or scream or cry at Romanoff.

Not that Romanoff ever explained herself and Maria never asked. It was more of a silent apology. Even though now that Maria looks at it, there really was no apology at all, silent or otherwise.

But Romanoff was starting to fade back into Natasha. And Maria could see Natasha whenever she picked up Thai food for them to eat, cuddled on the couch after a long day, or mumbled in her sleep as Maria held onto her.

Even though it looked like the Avengers were falling into complete chaos, Maria finally had a piece in her life that was beginning to set. Maybe this time it could work. This time her bucket was whole and she could keep the water from running.

And then the day came. The day where civil war broke out and once again Romanoff double crossed her. Once again she held out a hand to her, only for Romanoff to grab it and tear it off, violently and purposefully pulling pieces of her soul that were just starting to mend.

Romanoff didn’t follow their expertly crafted plans at all, and once again Maria was forced to watch in horror as she obliterated months of careful planning in only a few minutes. She watched as her life’s work once again crumbled before her very eyes.

But what should Maria have expected? This is how it has always played out ever since day one with Romanoff. And every single damn time Romanoff plays her like a fiddle and she’s left even worse than she’d started out. Maria would always think she was at rock bottom, only for Romanoff to find her a deeper hole to throw her in.

And sure, deep down, Maria knew that the whole thing with Stark and Rogers was a mess and maybe just Romanoff wasn’t to blame, but damnit, they had a pretty good plan that probably would’ve worked. Going on the run with Rogers wasn’t even an option to choose from. Not even a worse-case scenario option. Romanoff freely choose to do that. She changed the scantron from being multiple choice to free response.

It really shouldn’t have surprised Maria that she ran. And it didn’t, not really. What surprised her was that she went on the run WITH someone. She wasn’t alone. Which just proved that she could’ve had someone with her all along. She was fully capable of running with someone instead of just running away from someone.

And that’s when Maria knew. She knew that she would always be a broken bucket; there was no fixing her. And Romanoff would always find the cracks in her. And she would always be a cracked bucket to Romanoff because she would never see her as an equal.

In fact, Maria was never a thought in her mind. She was just convenient. Convenience was all there was to it. Maria was just the closest warm and consenting body, and that’s why they fucked. Maria had a private apartment and that’s why Romanoff would come over. Maria truly meant nothing to her. That’s why there was never an apology, never a reassurance, never anything. Because Romanoff didn’t think she deserved anything. Romanoff didn’t give out participation trophies and Maria was just as mediocre as the rest of the players.

Romanoff’s days with Maria were always numbered because there’s only so long a cracked bucket can have water in it before it all leaks out onto the floor.

And it’s still that way. They’re only working together because they have to. And it’s clear once again that Romanoff doesn’t think Maria is worthy of sharing her insights with.

“Fuck, Hill, watch out!” Romanoff shouts somewhere in Maria’s foggy brain. Maria feels a jolt and focuses her eyes on Romanoff’s hand on the wheel, veering them to the other side of the road and away from the car. “Pay attention to the road, damnit!”

“You did smash my brains into a smoothie.” Maria grumbles, eyes now completely aware and back on the road. Of course Romanoff ruins even driving for her. Maria’s one happy place is soiled with the likes of Romanoff.

“Yeah because being blown up would be so much better.” Romanoff mocks.

Fuck she’s so annoying. “Can you just be quiet the rest of the drive?” Maria pleads, Romanoff’s grating voice is giving her a headache. Romanoff sarcastically moves her fingers across her lips like a zipper then “throws away the key.” What an absolute bratty child. But at least she’s silent.

And she does stay silent for the rest of the trip. Maria is able to get them to Parker’s school a few minutes before he’s due out of it.

“You should stay in the car.” Maria says to Romanoff when she sees her starting to unbuckle her seat belt. “For all Parker knows, you’re supposed to be dead. It’ll be harder to convince him to come with me if the reincarnation of the Black Widow is standing next to me.”

“But I can help.” Romanoff argues, even though this is not up for discussion. “I know Peter.”

“You don’t know him, you’ve heard stories about him from Stark, but you’ve barely met him. You were on the run for the two years Parker was at SI.” Maria points out. Maybe she would’ve known Parker if she actually kept in touch with anyone in her life or swung by every once in a while. But she didn’t. And Maria did. Maria stayed put at SI every single day and she actually got to meet Parker. He would work sometimes in Stark’s lab with them.

Romanoff flinches and then quietly agrees, “I guess you’re right.” She puts her seatbelt on in compliance.

Suddenly uncomfortable with Romanoff’s rapid shift in mood, Maria stops talking and rolls the windows down before she turns off the car.

“Wait you’re leaving the windows open and leaving like I’m some dog stuck in a car?” Romanoff challenges.

“It’s so you can hear, smartass.” Maria rolls her eyes.

“Still treating me like a dog.”

“No,” Maria slowly and clearly states, making direct eye contact with Romanoff, “a dog would actually listen.” Romanoff scowls at her and sticks her tongue out. Maria chuckles and closes the car door.

“Not funny, Hill.” Romanoff shouts out the window at her. Maria can feel deep in her bones that she’s flipping her off right now, but she doesn’t look back.

Maria waits near the front stairs of the school and looks at the door. A few minutes pass and a couple of kids begin to slowly stream out of the main doors. Maria looks around to find Parker. It sure would be easier to find him if that kid were more than 5 feet tall.

She’s finally able to spot him opening up the doors and starting to walk down the steps. Luckily it looks like he’s alone. She really didn’t want to make room in the car for any more people than him.

“Parker!” Maria calls out and waves her arm in the air to catch his attention. “I need to talk to you.”

“No, Parker, come over here!” A voice counters. And oh shit is that a familiar voice. Maria slows turns to see herself just a few feet away.

Skrull Maria catches her gaze and gives her a half smile. Something flashes in her eyes and Maria gets chills on her arms. This is too fucking weird.

“What’s going on here?” Parker asks, starting to walk back up the stairs away from them.

Before Maria can respond, another voice interrupts her.

“Hey, Hill, I think I saw the skrulls, be careful!” Romanoff shouts and turns around the corner.

“A little late for that notice.” Maria grumbles, gesturing to the Skrull Maria carefully watching them.

“Ms. Romanoff?” Parker asks, his eyes wide. He’s almost turning into those squeezy toys with the bugging eyes. Not that Maria can blame him, that was pretty much how she felt seeing Romanoff for the first time after the Decimation too. Then again, Maria really hopes they don’t have the same experiences of Romanoff.

“Hey, Peter.” Romanoff waves. “What’s up?”

“I don’t know what’s happening here.” Parker breathes out. “What the fuck is going on?” He puts his hand on his forehead, his legs beginning to move backwards again.

“Parker, I’m afraid these two are imposters.” A fourth voice adds in and Skrull Fury walks into view. Which is clearly not a dramatic enough entrance for the real Fury. “We’ve just got word that a hostile enemy alien species has made their way to Earth. They have the ability to shapeshift.”

“More aliens?” Parker groans. “The last time I fought aliens Mr… Mr. Stark died.” Fuck, this poor kid. First he loses Stark, then he gets tricked by Mysterio, and now he’s pulled into a fight against aliens. He just can’t catch a damn break and Maria feels for him.

“Hey, Peter, it’s okay. It’s not gonna turn out that way, alright.” Maria soothes, something inside her prompting her to reassure this kid. “There are shape shifting aliens but they’re definitely not as bad as Thanos.”

“You hope.” Romanoff scoffs under her breath.

“Well how do I know which of you is real and which is the alien? What if you’re both aliens?” Parker does make a valid point.

“The aliens revert back into their true selves when they are extremely hurt and close to death.” Skrull Maria supplies.

“Well that can be arranged.” Romanoff pulls out the glock from its holster and points if at Skrull Maria.

“Romanoff, stand down, we can do this without making a scene.” Maria hisses. The last thing she needs is mass panic by the public.

“The alien is right.” Skrull Fury agrees. “Unnecessary violence isn’t the best option here.”

“I think it should be between me and her.” Skrull Maria points at Maria. “Since we’re both the same person apparently, you can ask us questions only the real Maria Hill would know. And Parker will go with whoever doesn’t get any wrong and the other side must respect that.”

“But you can’t ask anything after the Decimation, since that wasn’t actually me.” Maria adds. She’s not playing this game by the skrull’s rules.

“Well how do I know that there ever was a real Ms. Hill?” Parker asks. “You could’ve been an alien this whole time.” Kid does make a good point and Maria is left to rack her brain on how Parker can trust her answers.

“Remember that one time that Stark’s invention malfunctioned and sent me into medical?” Skrull Maria brings up. “My heart stopped for a few seconds. If I were an alien, I would’ve reverted back into an alien form from being that close to death. So ask any questions around that time.”

“What is she talking about, did you really almost die?” Romanoff murmurs to her, her green eyes trying to find her blue ones. But Maria doesn’t answer her, she has more things to worry about.

Like how did the skrull know that? It wasn’t like that was public knowledge and the only people there were Stark, Parker, Pepper, and then Helen Cho. What is Maria getting herself into?

“I’m fine with that.” Maria carefully says. Although she knows that she will know every answer to any question Parker will ask, the skrull is obviously up to something. She wouldn’t have suggested this game if she knew she would have no chance at winning. Maria hates being left so far in the dark.

These skrulls are so far ahead of anything that her and Romanoff could ever be planning.

“Okay,” Parker starts off, “then tell me why you were in the hospital. What was it that went wrong?” He points at Maria.

Easy question. “We were testing out a new entire for the model X7 jet pack Stark was working on. It started off a nice day but then it started to lightning. I tried to clear it, but the jet pack was zapped, frying one of the gears. It overheated and exploded, sending me into the ground.”

Parker nods. “And when did Pepper say you would be allowed back into the lab with Mr. Stark?” This time Skrull Maria answers.

“She said she’d fire me if I stepped into that lab before the last cast was off.” Now how could she have known that? The only people there for that conversation were her, Stark, Parker, and Pepper. Parker was in the Decimation and Stark was otherwise busy, so maybe Pepper told her, not knowing it wasn’t the real Maria? But that still doesn’t make much sense.

“And how long did that end up being?”

“Only three weeks.” Maria answers. Rationally she knows that Parker wouldn’t know why it took her such a short amount of time to heal, but she holds her breath hoping that that isn’t his next question.

“And what was the next thing you worked on with Mr. Stark and me?” Maria lets out a sigh of relief. That isn’t a conversation she wants to have in the middle of the public.

“The Immortal Rocket.” How is she right again? It’s not adding up.

“How the fuck?” Maria curses. This is going to take all day.

“The security tapes.” Romanoff whispers. “Stark has cameras and shit all over that place. They could’ve seen footage of you in the tower.” That… that’s actually a valid point. It’s the only thing that makes sense.

“Wait, Parker, before you go on with any more questions about things we worked on together in the lab, can you ask about stuff that happened outside the tower? There’re tapes in the tower that could’ve been seen by people not actually present at that time.” Maria requests.

“Then that leaves me with nothing. I’ve really only met you when working with Mr. Stark, ma’am.” Parker does have a point. She’s really only talked to Parker when they were both in the lab. Like she’s said, she’s bad with kids. And she never was one for small talk.

“So where does that leave us?” Skrull Fury asks.

“So maybe none of us have directly talked to you, but we’ve all talked to Stark and Stark talks about you a lot. So just think of something Stark would’ve told us about you that wouldn’t be important or loud enough to take note of when watching security footage.” Romanoff suggests. Which isn’t the worst idea, except Maria and Stark don’t usually talk about those sort of things. He really didn’t tell many stories about Parker to her. They were sort of close, but they weren’t that close. Romanoff is kind of setting them up for failure here.

“I can’t really think of anything.” Parker’s eyes dart from one pair to the other.

“Anything you think he would mention to a good friend for laughs, but would respect your privacy enough to not say it too loudly.” Maria adds. Even though this whole thing seems pointless. Everything she knows about Parker she knows from working with him. That or it’s the really basic stuff.

“Okay, I think I have something. And this is for all of it.” Parker gulps and takes a deep breath. “How did Aunt May find out I was Spiderman?”

Maria has no clue. She had to have known it was him with all the time he put in with Stark. Stark would never have a random kid in his lab. He may be an idiot but he’s not that much of an idiot.

At least it seems like the skrulls don’t know the answer to that either or they would be piping up. But that might not last, Maria bet’s there’s someone checking the security tapes right now for them.

“Am I allowed to answer?” Romanoff asks Parker. “Because I believe we all agreed I wasn’t a skrull before the Decimation.” Skrull Fury begins to open his mouth but Natasha cuts him off. “Before you argue, I’d get your story straight, because you claimed I was a skrull after Vormir and we claim that I was a skrull for three years after the Decimation. Therefore, we’re both in agreeance that I was human at this point in time.”

“This is fine by me.” Skrull Maria declares, her eyes glaring at Romanoff. Does everything really depend on Romanoff? The game was meant to be played by Maria, yet here she is standing useless as their fate dangles in any words Romanoff has to say.

“This happened sometime in July 2017. Tony told me that you’re such a shit liar, but somehow May ate up whatever you said to her and never questioned that you were Spiderman. So you had to really fuck up. Which you did. She walked in on you wearing the Spiderman suit.” Romanoff has a smug smile on her face. Was that really it? A little anticlimactic if you ask her.

All four of them turn to look at Parker.

“Correct.” Parker announces and Romanoff flashes a toothy grin at Maria. This is really their first win over the skrulls. They fought them head on… well sort of. But what matters is that they won.

“So you will uphold your end of the deal?” Maria questions the two skrulls. “He comes with us and you let him.”

“Parker, you’re making a mistake.” Skrull Fury warns. “We won’t be far away when things go south.” Maria swears that sounds like a threat to them.

“Come on, Peter, let’s get the fuck out of here.” Romanoff says, starting to walk to the car. Parker sends a glare at the skrulls and Maria worries for a split second that he’ll start going with them. But sure enough, he starts to slowly make his way down the concrete stairs over to the car.

He’s almost at where Maria is. She should say something, shouldn’t she? I mean this is the first time she’s seen him in years, it’s mandatory to greet him, right?

“Good to see you, Parker.” Maria nods her head at him. Internally she cringes a little. Was that really the best she could do? Fuck, why can’t she add any more warmth into the greeting, this isn’t a damn business transaction. This is one of her best friend’s weird surrogate son. This is why everyone assumes she’s made of metal and ice.

“You too, Ms. Hill.” Parker smiles up at her. Maybe she didn’t fuck up too bad. Or maybe Parker’s just a good kid. He’s still a good kid even though the universe hasn’t been very good to him. He’s strong. Stronger than she ever really gives him credit for. Stronger than most people give him credit for.

Parker’s stopped walking and they’re now just standing on the sidewalk looking at each other.

Maria manages to give a slight smile at him. “Let’s go then.” They walk to the car together and Maria glances back to peek at the skrulls. At least they’re staying back. What kind of enemy respectfully lets someone disrupt their plans? Maybe they just want to follow them? They’ll definitely need to switch cars a few times to get them off their trail.

Their faces are blank as Maria looks at them. They must be planning something. Maria wonders how good they are at making things up on the fly. Everything else they’ve done so far seems to have taken careful planning. And all that careful planning goes to shit if they can’t make up for the plot twists thrown at them. And now Maria is sounding like Romanoff trying to justify her erratic actions. She really needs some damn time away from her.

But of course right now she’s not blessed with that luxury, as she slides into the car next to Romanoff.

“Damn, kid,” Romanoff smirks at Peter, her eyes with a mischievous twinkle, “you have not grown at all in the nine years since I’ve seen you.”

“Romanoff!” Maria scolds. She’s not going to sit here and have Romanoff get on Parker’s nerves until he decides he’d rather be with the skrulls than with them.

“Same can be said for you, Ms. Romanoff.” Parker answers, immediately wiping the smirk off her dumb face and transferring it to Maria’s. Yeah that’s Stark’s kid for sure. He’s gonna be just fine. But Romanoff made a mistake there because now it’s not just Maria against Romanoff. Now it’s Parker and Maria against Romanoff. This will be a good car ride.

Which was good. Because it was a long ass car ride. They switched cars at least six times. Plus, Romanoff’s directions were all over the place, leading them zigzagging through what seems like the entire east coast and Midwest.

They’ve spent three days on this damn road trip and by now Maria is certain Romanoff’s giving bullshit directions. She probably doesn’t even have a plan. Just wasting their damn time. Fuck, Romanoff always has a streak of letting Maria down in missions. Of letting the entire team down in missions.

“Do you even know where you’re going, Ms. Romanoff?” Parker asks, sounding bored as hell. Which is valid. Maria should’ve thrown a slinky or rubber ball back there for him to play with. That’s what kids his age use, right? They had to take away his phone in case any of the skrulls were trying to track it. They left in the first car way back in New Jersey. Parker was less than thrilled.

They pass the “Welcome to Ohio” sign as they cross over the Ohio River.

“Call me Natasha, kid.” Romanoff rolls her eyes at him. “’Ms. Romanoff’ just reminds me of self-absorbed senators and council members trying to pretend like they can interrogate a professional spy.”

“Kid has a point though, Romanoff,” Maria starts, “if we spend any more than two more days on this wild goose chase, I’m calling it and we’re doing things my way.”

“You don’t even have a plan, Hill.” Romanoff snorts. “You’re not gonna spend five days driving just to give up. Besides we’re almost here. So you BOTH can quit the whining. We get there when we get there.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” Maria grunts. What could possibly be in middle of nowhere buttfuck Ohio besides corn and orange traffic cones?

Maria’s visited Ohio once before in her life. It was while waiting for the army to come get her right after she turned 18. She’s still bitter about it. Worst couple of months of her life. Well… that’s maybe overdramatic but you get the point.

“Who wants to play I Spy?” Parker asks for the hundredth time today, breaking their return to silence. Romanoff and Maria both let out the loudest groans. At least they can agree on something.

“I spy with my little eye,” Parker starts, two hours into their drive through Ohio, “something yellow.”

“It’s corn.” Maria says immediately.

“You got it!” Parker exclaims like it’s some big feat.

“It’s ALL corn. It’s always been corn. It’ll always be corn.” Maria wails. She’s about to lose her goddamn mind. Is this what Romanoff’s playing at? Take them into the Ohio cornlands and make them go crazy? She’s been silent for the past hour of the drive, leaving Maria to be the one to play I Spy with Parker and the corn.

“Your turn, Maria.” Parker says.

“I spy with my little eye, something yellow.” Maria mutters.

“Uhhhh.” Parker looks around. What is he looking at? There’s nothing there. Maria is two seconds away from dropping her head onto the wheel and just giving up.

“Stop.” Romanoff orders.

“Yes, can we please stop this game?” Maria breathes out. Finally, Romanoff has a good idea.

“No stop going straight, take a left on this road.”

“You mean that shitty dirt trail that probably can’t even fit a whole car?” Maria raises her eyebrow.

“Yes, smartass, that one. Just take the fucking road.”

“Whatever you say, I live to serve you.” Maria mocks.

“Cut the shit and just take the damn road.” Romanoff snaps and Maria turns the wheel. So now they’re slowly bumping down the shitty path. And here Maria didn’t think their trip in Ohio could get worse, now Romanoff isn’t even taking them on actual roads anymore. This really is getting ridiculous. Maria looks back in the mirror at Parker and they both share A Look™. At least Parker also agrees that Romanoff’s lost her mind.

As they continue down the path, it starts looking more like a driveway instead of a road. They inch closer and closer to what looks like an old barn turned into some sort of building. This could be one of Romanoff’s safe houses. But they already have everything they need, what they need is intel. Not a visit to a decade old safe house.

“Park in the front.” Romanoff demands as Maria pulls in close to the barn. She parks the car and turns off the ignition.

“Why are we at an old safe house?” Maria questions, Romanoff being as cryptic as ever.

“She’s meeting us here.” Romanoff supplies. She opens the door and steps out on the dirt ground. Parker follows suit and Maria reluctantly does as well.

The three of them stand in the dirt facing the large weathered barn door. The door then begins to open. A figure steps out into the fading Midwest sun. Where does Maria recognize that face from? The strong, angled jaw. The small muscular frame. The blond hair. It’s all so familiar.

<<What kind of stupid shit have you gotten yourself into now, Natalia?>> The woman mutters in Russian, strong arms crossing over her chest.

<<Good to see you too, sis>> Romanoff glances up at her, eyes sharp and grin as toothy as a shark.

And that’s when Maria knows she’s staring into the brown eyes of Red Room assassin Yelena Belova.

The same Yelena Belova that was killed in 2008 by S.H.I.E.L.D agent Natasha Romanoff.