Chapter 8
Getting over Steve was something Tony was supposed to have done years ago. He told himself after all the bullshit and pain Steve put him through that he would be done with him and move on. For a while, he seemed to do okay. He had Pepper and a beautiful little girl to raise. Morgan was the light in the darkness, making Tony’s days more vibrant than ever before. She helped him overcome a lot and made him a better person. She was just what he needed after Steve walked away.
But as it would turn out, those feelings Tony thought he had buried deep resurfaced the moment Steve appeard back into his life. Though a part of Tony was thrilled to see Steve again, the other half was hesitant and wary.
The good thing about having Steve back was Morgan finally getting to meet the man who birthed her. At first, Tony had been unsure about introducing Morgan to him, but now that he’s seen them interact and how much Morgan cares about him, Tony’s glad they finally got to meet. But he’s still worried about Steve being a wanted criminal and all the trouble surrounding him. Tony promised he was going to keep Morgan safe, and he intended to keep that promise no matter what.
It’s well past Morgan’s bedtime, and as usual, she’s fighting sleep. Pepper had given her a bath and helped her into her pajamas, leaving the bedtime story for Tony; a routine they’ve had since Morgan was little.
“She’s asking for you,” Pepper says, stepping out of Morgan’s room. Tony is waiting in the hall for his turn, the book he’s been reading to Morgan tucked under his arm.
“No surprise there. She does love me more,” Tony jokes.
Pepper smiles, only for it to falter a moment later. She heaves out a sigh and crosses her arms over her chest. “She has a new favorite now. You have some serious competition.”
“I know you’re the favorite but I think I come pretty damn close.”
“It’s not me, Tony.” Pepper’s voice is laced with sadness and that’s when Tony realizes who Morgan’s new favorite person is.
“Oh,” he says, unsure of what else to add. He wants to say more, maybe something to console her or assure her that Morgan still loved Pepper and saw her as her mother, but the words get lost.
Pepper sighs again. “I’m going to bed. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Pepper smiles sadly and leans in to peck him on the cheek. Tony takes her hand before she can leave, urging her to stay for a moment.
“Pep, she loves you,” he finally finds the words he had been meaning to say. “Steve is just…he’s–”
“Don’t say he’s nothing when he clearly means something to her. I promise I’m okay with that. She’s his daughter, too. I guess I just thought you and I would be her only parents.”
“I know. Trust me, I know. I don’t think anyone expected him to come back, but he did and now all we can do is figure out how to do this whole co-parent thing. That’s what you wanted, remember?”
Pepper nods. “Yeah. No, no, you’re right. She needs him in her life.”
“It’s gonna be fine. You’re still her mother. That’s never going to change,” Tony assures. And when Pepper smiles, he feels better about the whole thing.
After Pepper goes to bed, Tony enters Morgan’s room, finding her out of bed and drawing at her desk. She looks up and gasps when she sees him, dropping her crayons and rushing back to bed.
“I hope you never plan to become a ninja when you grow up because you’re not that sneaky,” Tony says with an amused smile playing over his lips.
Morgan giggles and grabs her stuffed animal, hugging it close to her chest. “I want to be a superhero when I grow up!”
“Why? Because Daddy is the coolest that every lived?”
“Yeah! And Mama is too! He’s so strong!”
“Right.” Tony does his best to keep any disappointment out of his tone. He knows Steve promised to be around for their daughter, but deep down he still worries about Steve’s mistakes catching up to him. It would crush Morgan. “Scoot over, it’s story time,” he says, quickly changing the subject.
“Can I see Mama again?” Morgan asks.
“Didn’t you just see him today?”
“Yeah, but I want to see him again! All the time!”
“I know you do, but he lives in the compound and your butt lives here.” Tony opens the book. “Now where were we?”
“Can he live with us?”
“No, he has a home. He’s not some lost dog we need to take in. Now book time.”
“Can we live with him?”
Tony huffs and looks over at her. “Morgan, he has his home and this is yours.”
“So I can’t live with him all the time?” Morgan asks, a pout forming over her lips.
“It’s…complicated, sweetheart. Mama has his own home where you get to visit him when Mommy and I say.”
Morgan frowns. “But what if you say no?”
“Morgan—”
“Can I see him tomorrow? I was drawing him a new picture.” Morgan makes an attempt to get out of bed, but Tony holds her back.
“It’s bedtime. You can show me in the morning.”
Morgan pouts and holds her stuffy tighter. “Fine,” she says, defeated.
“Good.” Tony grins and he gets back to the story.
He barely makes it halfway through before she’s dozing off. Tony closes the book and sets in on the nightstand, then he ducks down to give her a kiss. Before leaving her room he finds the picture she had been drawing, not surprised to see that she had drawn herself along with Steve and himself. Pepper isn’t in the drawing.
“Damn it,” he mutters to himself and tucks the picture away.
Pepper is still up when Tony finally joins her in the bedroom. Her nose is buried in a book, but Tony knows she’s not really interested in whatever she’s reading.
“That took longer than usual,” she says, barely acknowledging Tony’s presence.
“She wanted to fight sleep and talk my ear off,” Tony says, pulling back the comforter and climbing into bed.
“About him I’m sure.”
Tony frowns and turns his head toward her; she’s still focused on her book, but he can tell by the annoyed expression on her face that she’s still upset over Steve or whatever was bothering her. Steve no doubt.
“Be honest, does having him around bother you that much?” Tony asks, determined to get to the root of the problem.
“No,” Pepper replies, her tone still laced with annoyance.
“I don’t get you sometimes. You said you wanted me to make amends and have Morgan know him, and now that he’s here in her life you seem…I don’t know…mad.”
“I’m not.” Pepper puts her book down with a huff. “I’m glad her mother finally decided to step up and be there for her.”
“Hey, wait a minute. He was on the run. He couldn’t be here. Him being here now is still risky but—”
“Exactly! What if Ross finds him and he gets arrested or he’s forced to flee again? That little girl is going to be crushed.”
“You don’t think I know that? It bothers me too, but I’m trying to fix it somehow so that doesn’t happen.”
“I know, I know.” Pepper turns away to put her book down on the end table, then she lies down, her gaze set above on the ceiling. “I don’t want her to get hurt, that’s all.”
Tony sighs and scoots closer to her, pulling her into his arms. “I won’t let that happen. Steve won’t hurt her. He feels bad enough for giving her up in the first place.”
Pepper nods and lies her head down on Tony’s chest. “Do you still love him?”
Tony frowns and cranes his neck to peer down at her. “What?”
“I just…I know you two have a history.”
“Yeah, so? It was a long time ago.”
“But he’s back now and you two have a daughter.”
“Pep, nothing is going to happen.”
“I’d understand if you decided to go back with him.”
“Stop. I don’t love him like that anymore. I love you.”
Pepper grows silent for a moment, and it’s times like this when Tony wishes he could read her mind. Finally, she replies to him, “I love you, too.”
Tony kisses the top of her head and assures her again that he wanted her and not Steve. But deep down he wonders if he’s not only lying to her, but himself too.