Promises
Somehow, they’d managed to maintain their embrace while travelling from the living room of sheets and empty mugs to Tony’s bedroom. Clothes were haphazardly tossed around the room and neither of them knew who was undressing who. Neither of them cared. Natasha’s fingers were desperately tugging at Tony’s hair while his fingers dug into her back, their sloppy kisses loud and frantic.
They’d barely made it to the bed when they were completely naked, and Nat was climbing on top of Tony, holding onto his length with a shaking hand before dropping her hips down. The relief and pleasure that they felt had them both groaning like old wood under pressure (no pun intended). As she furiously thrust her hips against his, her fingers clawed at his chest, while he responded in kind, pulling at her hips while he took in her green eyes with wonder. Those bright green eyes that were now hazy with desire and madness. Even in his drunk state, Tony tried to take in everything; the feeling of her soft bum in his hands, the sight of her bosom bouncing with every beat, and the sound of her voice as she sang her ecstasy.
With a grunt, he slammed her hips down and came hard, his cock throbbing within her with enough force to send her over the edge with a cry. She fell forward onto him, her hair a mess and her soft breasts pressed against his chest, illuminated softly by the Arc Reactor on his chest. The room was silent for a few minutes, barring the hoarse panting and the occasional whispered name. Tony turned his head to look at Natasha, and immediately kissed her. Her eyes widened in surprise, but she had no more time to recover, as Tony had already gotten hard again and was thrusting against her with all his might. She cried out as she felt his teeth land on her neck, his fingers tugging at her taut nipples, all while his pounding never ceased.
The rest of the night passed by in a blur, but by the end of it, she was sobbing into a pillow while Tony took her from behind, one hand fisted in her red locks, the other around her throat. Her hands were filled with sheets, and she was sure that she’d ripped them at one point. When he slammed into her one final time and spilled himself into her, she cried out into the pillow as her hips quivered and her toes curled, before she collapsed and Tony followed, his heavy body gasping over her shaking mess of a body.
Tony realised quickly how much he had missed kissing. Not just making out, but every sort of kiss. When he opened his eyes to the sunlight streaming in from the windows and onto the beautiful body that lay on top of his, curled up and refusing to let go, his eyes instinctively travelled to her lips. Red. Luscious. Swollen. Oh, how he longed to bite them.
Just a quick peck, he thought.
But just as he was about to lean in, her eyes opened, and his heart roared. ‘Just a quick peck’ was no longer gonna do. He surged forward, capturing her lips with the fervour of a lover who had been away too long; which was ironic, considering they’d never made love before last night. Natasha, for her part, moaned in delight as she wrapped her arms tighter around his head. His hand roamed down to her bottom and squeezed just as he growled and gently bit her lip.
“Ow,” she giggled as he pulled back and smiled at her fondly.
“Good morning,” he hummed. “Did you sleep well?”
“Did I sleep well? Yes,” she considered. “Did I sleep long?” She grinned at him teasingly. “No, you goddamn animal.”
He responded by sealing her lips and his hand continued exploring her body, as if there was a spot he’d missed last night.
“I love you,” he whispered into her ear.
Her hands froze in his hair and her breath hitched. Her eyes widened and she stopped moving. Immediately sensing her shock, he pulled away, worried.
“Nat?” he whispered slowly, but still she didn’t respond, eyes in alarm.
“Daddy!!”
Within two seconds, he was off the bed and had hastily pulled on his pants. “Hey sweetheart,” he cooed as he opened the door ajar, making sure to block any possible view of the bed. “You’re up early.”
“I want pancakes!” Morgan grinned, bouncing up and down in excitement.
“Ok,” Tony smiled in reply. “I’ll get dressed and see you downstairs ok?”
“Ok!” his daughter agreed, before sprinting downstairs to the kitchen. Tony turned around and saw that Nat had sat up, but was not any less alarmed than she had been two minutes ago. He sighed.
“Look, Natasha,” he began his apology. “I-”
“I’m sorry,” she blurted out, and in a flash, she had slipped out of bed and closed the bathroom door behind her.
Tony let out another defeated sigh before picking up a shirt and slipping it on. Clearly, she needed some time alone. As he trudged downstairs and plastered a smile on his face, his heart felt heavy and he wondered if he had ruined a perfectly good relationship by acting too rashly. In his defence, he thought with a grumble while whipping up the pancake batter, she’d jumped him first. In her defence, he’d kinda insinuated that he wanted to establish that her role in this family was bigger than she would acknowledge. Wait, her defence? She doesn’t get a defence, he’d only said good stuff.
Morgan watched with interest as her father visibly argued with himself, beating the white liquid relentlessly, a frown set upon his face.
“Daddy?” She piped up.
“Yes, honey?” He answered, looking up and finally placing the large bowl on the table.
“What’s going on?”
He looked at her wide eyes and smiled. “I don’t know, kiddo,” he chuckled as he pulled out the frying pan and turned on the fire. “I wish I did.” Chocolate chips? Chocolate chips.
He felt a tugging on his shirt and looked down to see that little Morgan had hopped off her place on the barstool and was now looking at him with her arms open wide. He broke into fond laughter and lifted her into his arms, while she wrapped hers around his neck determinedly.
“Everything will be ok,” she whispered, squeezing harder.
“I know, baby,” he hummed, flipping the pancake with his one free hand. Somehow, he managed to make a whole stack of pancakes with one arm carrying the koala of a child he had, and not a single one was burnt.
By the time Tony had put the empty dishes in the sink and turned on the faucet, there was still no sign of Natasha. So, with a sigh, Tony diligently cleaned up before begrudgingly heading up the stairs to his bedroom. Yet, when he opened the door, he found the room empty, and his bathroom door open. She wasn’t here. He sucked in a deep breath and picked up the mess, resolving to take a shower before looking for her.
Unsurprisingly, she wasn’t in her room, but her room faced the lake, and when he walked over to close her open window, he saw a spot of red and black at the edge of the lake and smiled tiredly. There you are, Widow. Five minutes later, he was approaching her from behind, not even trying to be silent. She would know if he was trying to sneak up on her, and if he happened to succeed, he was definitely not coming out of that situation unscathed.
She had her leather jacket on and a clean pair of jeans, but if one looked too closely at her neck or her hastily braided hair, the evidence of their activities the previous night was more than obvious. She stood without a hint of acknowledging his presence, eyes trained forwards while her hands remained in her pocket.
Tony grunted as he sat down on the ground behind her, waiting for her start this conversation. She didn’t speak or move for another twenty minutes, but that was alright, Tony Stark was nothing if not a patient man. That was utter bullshit – his leg was shaking with anxiety and he had all but chewed his fingernails off by the time she spoke.
“I’m sorry, Tony,” she whispered.
He sighed, even has his heart ached and he unconsciously reached for his Arc Reactor and squeezed it. “No,” he replied forlornly. “I’m sorry. I was wrong to say something of that magnitude to you. I understand if you-”
“No!” She exclaimed, head whipping around as she stared at him with red-rimmed eyes. He was taken aback. “No, you don’t understand.”
After getting over his momentary shock, he patted the spot next to him and looked up at her again. “Then tell me,” he answered.
She seemed to think about it for a second before gingerly sitting down beside him. His eyes landed on her bottom and he tried his hardest to push away the memories of her gorgeous rump from the previous night. There’s a time and place, Tony, he counselled himself.
“Many men have told me that they loved me,” she said finally.
Well that makes me feel special, he thought with a scoff, but when she glared at him, he raised his hands in apology.
“Many men have said that they loved me,” she repeated, slightly irritated. “And I have said it back to them many times.” She looked down and started pulling at the grass. “But I have never meant it.”
Tony watched her fingers tug at the ground anxiously, eyebrows knitted as she tried to pull the words out of her soul like she was extracting teeth.
“Those men loved me, but it was because I made them love me. It was my job to seduce and then be reused. I go into the field, make them fall in love with me and then take whatever I need, no matter the cost, and then I leave. I know how to exploit human emotions, Tony, and after I’m done using them, I break their hearts and disappear.” She looked at him in the eyes and he swore that he could see the broken glass in those green orbs.
“Do you understand what it’s like to tell a lie so much that you don’t know how to say the truth?” She said, her voice quivering, and he knew that his heart broke right there. “When you said that you loved me, do you know how guilty I felt? My first instinct was that I made you fall in love with me. That somehow I had manipulated you.” Her tears were flowing unabashedly, and it took everything for Tony not to pull her into his arms.
Instead, he placed a hand on her cheek and wiped her tear with her thumb. “My love for you,” he whispered. “Is my choice.”
“I know that,” she choked out, pointing to her head. “I know that in here. But emotions aren’t logical! It felt like I tricked you! It felt like I was being selfish, because-”
She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Because I love you too,” she sobbed, and this time, self-control be damned, he reached forward and roughly yanked her into his arms. “I’ve loved you for a very long time.” Her hands pulled at his shirt and his arms tightened around her shoulders.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” He whispered, voice wet with emotion. “I’ve loved you for quite a while too.”
She just dug her head deeper into his chest.
“How could I be sure that I wasn’t making you feel that way?” She replied. “How could I be sure that I wasn’t manipulating you? How could I not feel like I was stealing you from Pepper?”
Tony pulled away with a smile, looking at her with such kindness that she began to sob again. “Oh, my beautiful Widow,” he whispered as though the answer was simple. “As long as your actions come from here,” he tapped her chest, “and not here,” he tapped her temple. “Then I know you’re being truthful, and not manipulating me.”
She looked up at him with her large wet eyes, pleading. “Promise?” she asked.
He chuckled. “Promise you’re being your true self when you’re around me?” he replied.
Natasha rolled her eyes. “Tony, I’m bawling my eyes out in front of you.” He laughed, but when he kept his eyebrows raised expectantly, she buried her face into his chest again bashfully. “I promise,” she mumbled.
“Promise you won’t leave me?”
She stilled when she sensed the fragility in his voice, and she deliberately looked into his eyes. “I promise.”
Satisfied, he took in a deep breath. “Then I promise too,” he placed a kiss on her head. “I promise that I love you, not for what you’ve done for me, but for who you are. You are strong, beautiful, and kind. You are loyal, and you will never let me down.”
“Oh my god, Tony,” she raised her head in embarrassment. “Shut the hell up. Hasn’t there been enough crying today?”
He laughed, but leaned down and placed and kiss on her waiting lips, and even as he tasted the salty tears that they’d both shed, his heart bloomed with a sweetness he’d long forgotten about.
“Let’s go make you some pancakes, eh?” he asked.
“Actually,” she smiled sheepishly. “I’m kinda craving cheeseburgers.”