Chapter 8
Adelaide sat quietly with Bucky and Clint, coloring in a page that they had found for her. Actually, it was a book full of pages for her to draw in, but she wanted to be able to color them in again, so they had copied it for her. They doted on her, it was obvious. Bucky was going under tomorrow morning, so the two were practically inseparable. Adelaide was as talkative as ever, which wasn’t much, but she was doing as much as she could with her dad. They watched movies and listened to music with Steve to get caught up on modern culture, went on walks through the city with Wanda, and as they were doing now, coloring with Clint and/or Scott. Wanda pulled Clint away for a moment, and the two were left on their own. Adelaide finished her picture and handed it to her father for inspection. “It’s beautiful, Addie,” he said with a smile. “Better than I could ever do. Almost better than Stevie too.” She blushed and looked down.
“’S not that good,” she mumbled.
“Yes it is. You’re quite the artist, zvezdnyy svet.” She smiled shyly and took the page back, leaving it on the table for Clint to see when he came back. She wrote his name on the back of the page so Clint would know he could keep it. She yawned loudly, and Bucky picked her up. “C’mon, doll, time for bed.”
“No,” she said pitifully.
“Yes. You can barely keep your eyes open, printsessa.”
“Wanna stay up with you,” she mumbled sleepily, rubbing her eyes.
“Solnechnyy svet, I’m going to bed with you. Nobody’s staying up.”
“But I don’ wanna let you go away,” she said into his neck. He halted mid-stride and squeezed her tighter.
“Oh, kulka,” he said quietly, “everything will be alright.” He started walking again.
“No, it won’t,” she replied. “You won’t be with me. You won’t be there to do all the things daddies do. Not for a while.”
“But you’ll have Steve, Clint, and the others. Aren’t they important to you?” he asked as he entered their living area.
“Yes, but they aren’t the same, Papa.”
“But they love you, kotenok. Almost as much as I do. They only want you to be happy.”
“But I’m happy with you.”
“I know, myshka, I know. You make me the happiest I’ve been since I can remember. I love you so much, malo solnechnogo sveta, I don’t know how to explain it. But I also want to be able to do all the things that daddies are supposed to do without worrying about hurting you or anyone else. Don’t you think that’d make things so much better?” Adelaide nodded reluctantly as she let Bucky change her into her nightclothes, which honestly consisted of just one of his shirts and some shorts that T’Challa had provided for her. She climbed up into bed and nestled into Bucky’s chest once he had turned off the lights and climbed into bed. (little sunshine)
“I suppose, but only to keep everyone else safe. I don’t think you’re dangerous.”
“I know, printsessa. Now, go to sleep. I’ll make breakfast in the morning.”
“Pancakes and bacon?” she asked hopefully, causing Bucky to chuckle.
“Yeah, we can do that. Spokoynoy nochi, moye serdtse.” (Goodnight, my heart.)
“Spokoynoy nochi, papa.”
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Adelaide promised herself when she got up that morning that she wouldn’t cry. She’d see her dad again; she had to. She’d be strong; she’d show him that she would be able to take care of Steve. Adelaide walked next to him towards the medical wing of the palace, left hand clasped tightly in his right. He wore comfortable clothes, and she was wearing a cute little yellow sundress that had white polka-dots all over it. Her long brown hair was tied back in a white ribbon, and her little white shoes clicked on the floor. Yes, Steve and Bucky had picked her outfit out for her; no, she didn’t like it all that much; yes, she would continue to wear it; no, she would not complain about it. Steve walked behind the two, silently watching them. When they entered the room, Adelaide shivered at the chamber there. Bad memories that she didn’t want to think about fought to swim to the surface of her mind, but she forced them back down, choosing instead to focus on her dad, who was sitting on the examination table and holding out his hand for her to join him. Steve picked her up and set her down next to Bucky, and the three waited patiently and silently as the doctors looked him over and made sure nothing was going to go wrong. Then, they left the three to say their “until we meet agains”. “You sure about this?” Steve asked Bucky.
“I can’t trust my own mind. So, until they figure out how to get this stuff out of my head, I think going back under is the best thing,” he paused and looked over at Adelaide, “for everyone.” She leaned against his left side silently, simply and quietly agreeing with his statement, though she didn’t like it. “Steve?”
“Yeah?”
“Take care of Addie.”
“Of course. You didn’t even have to ask.”
“Thank you. Addie, you be good, okay?” He looked at her with wide, pleading eyes. He needed to know that she’d be okay.
“Da, papa. I’ll behave.”
“Khoroshaya devochka. Make me proud, dorogaya. I’ll see you soon.” (good girl/darling)
“Ya budu, papa. YA lyublyu tebya. (I will, Daddy. I love you.)
“YA tozhe lyublyu tebya, moy angel. Ya vernus' k tebe.” (I love you too, my angel. I will come back to you.) With a final hug and kiss to her forehead, he gave Steve a nod and stepped into the chamber. The door slid closed, and the interior filled with a blast of something, and all it looked like was that he was sleeping. Adelaide laid a gentle hand on the glass, then left. She went to her room and climbed onto the bed she had left only two hours before with her dad and pulled his pillow close to her, cuddling it. There, in the quiet of her room, she started to cry. She was fine, until he said that last line.
“Why did you say that?” she asked the empty room. “Why? Why would you try to treat this like any other time? I was—I was okay, Daddy. I would have been fine, but now you—” She sobbed into the pillow until her eyes were puffy, her nose was stuffed, and her head hurt. She curled up and closed her eyes, thinking back over the memories she had with him. She hadn’t lost him, but she had to keep thinking happy thoughts.
We will sleep here tonight. We leave in the morning.
I love you too, kotenok.
I happen to like plums, doll. You don’t have to eat them.
Do it again, myshka, but do it like this instead.
No, printsessa, that’s not it. THIS is how you say it.
Get up.
Do you understand me?
You’re safe now.
Mission. Behave.
Bed.
You should sleep.
Miss me, kotenok?
And I’m taking you with me.
I’d do anything for you, myshka.
You mean more to me than anything.
Take care of Stevie and the others.
Good girl.
Only me, myshka.
I will come back to you.
I love you, Addie.
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A quiet knock sounded on her door, waking her up. She didn’t even remember going to sleep. “Adds, are you awake?” Clint’s voice called quietly as he opened the bedroom door.
“Yes,” she answered, sitting up and rubbing her sore eyes.
“Hey there, Adds,” he said, coming to sit with her. “The rest of us were going to watch a movie. Do you want to come join us?” She nodded, climbing out of bed and going to fix her sleep-tousled hair. “Did Cap pick that out for you?” Clint asked, watching her retie the ribbon.
“Yes.”
“I can tell. It’s very forties.” She glared at him in the mirror. “But it’s cute!” he backtracked. Clint led her back to the sitting room, where the others were sprawled out on the various couches and chairs. Clint collapsed into one of the armchairs, and Wanda patted the seat next to her for Adelaide to sit on. She curled into Wanda’s side and giggled a bit when she poked under her ribs.
“Are you alright?” Wanda asked quietly. “I know what it’s like.” Adelaide nodded.
“I will be,” she whispered back. “I have all of you.” Wanda smiled and nodded.
“Of course you do.” Adelaide sat and watched several movies with her little family, laughing and smiling with them as if everything was the same, though she was screaming in pain on the inside. She would push through the pain, though. She had to, for the others who loved her like their own, and for Bucky, the only true father she had ever known.