Daylight

“

RJ in position” Bucky heard in his communication. 

The darkness of the night surrounded Illinois as Bucky stood on a building’s rooftop, looking down at a warehouse entrance. RJ was not far from there, covering the other entrance. Sam had called them yesterday, asking if they could help S.H.I.E.L.D. dismantle a Hydra’s reunion. Even though Bucky was trying his best to avoid getting caught up on any government mess, he owned Sam plenty of favors. 

When the last person walked into the warehouse, Bucky waited a few moments until he was sure everyone had gotten in. 

-Now. 

Bucky said as he jumped off the roof and landed in front of the door, busting it with his legs. The door flew away, calling everyone’s attention. 

“Good night.” Bucky said seconds before a bunch of people came towards him. Some had guns and decided to shoot towards him, but they were all pretty inexperienced and their aims were all really bad, to be honest. This was not Hydra, this was a bunch of Hydra wannabes. Still, he didn’t pull any punch. 

Some decided to run towards the other entrance, only to see RJ stopping them from going anywhere. 

Not far, Bucky could see as RJ threw punches, kicked, and avoid being hit. Until a man caught him by surprise, with a sharp object Bucky could not identify, the man hit RJ’s head, making the boy yell in pain. Bucky tried to run towards him but was avoided by four men trying to punch him. 

Bucky let out a sigh and had to take care of them before he could make his way towards RJ, who had already recovered from the blow. 

“Are you good?” Bucky ran, checking the wound that was bleeding as best as he could while people still tried to punch and hurt both of them. 

“Had worse.” He heard RJ saying as he got another one unconscious. 

To bring everyone down took them less than 30 minutes; the neo-Nazis were immobilized and S.H.I.E.L.D was already waiting outside with cars, reinforcements, and a bus to take them all to jail. 

By the time it was all over and done, Bucky saw RJ sitting on the bad of one of the S.H.I.E.L.D’s car, away enough from the crowd and mess that the place had become. His clothes were dirty with blood that was coming out of his head wound.  

“Hey! Are you hurt?” He said, touching the back of RJ’s head, where the hair was a mess of dried blood, causing RJ to wince. “Sorry.”  

“I’m fine. I’m more hurt because one of these idiots could make me bleed.” RJ said with an annoyed voice. 

“Oh, your pride is safe with me. We can tell Steve they were three times your size.” Bucky said, joking. 

“I hate you.” RJ said, crossing his arms. Bucky laughed because there was no malice on those words, they had reached a point where they could tease each other with stuff like these and know that the other did not mean it. In fact, it probably meant the opposite. 

For a moment something Bucky couldn’t point his fingers on flashed through RJ’s face. Before it, the boy had an almost smile, his eyes were happy, but after that, it was like he caught himself doing something wrong and retrieved something inside of him.

“Nice to see that you are in a good mood.” Sharon Carter came walking towards them, hair in a ponytail and her usual fierce expression on her face. “We know this is below your pay grade, so thank you so much for coming to help us.” 

“Don’t worry about it, Sharon. It’s always nice to beat some Nazis.” Bucky said shaking her hand. 

“You must be RJ. Nice meeting you.” She said with a smile on her face, turning towards the boy. “I’m Sharon.” 

“Hi.” RJ said, still annoyed. 

“This seems like a nasty cut, wanna me to ask the paramedics to come and check on you?” 

“No need, it’ll be healed by the end of the week.” RJ said, dismissing it. “I think it already stopped bleeding.”

“Already?” Sharon looked surprised and eyed Bucky. 

“Yeah, it stopped bleeding; just a gauze or a large Band-Aid will be enough.” Bucky said, paying close attention to the wound. 

Sharon looked at him suspiciously, her brows knitting on her face and they stood silent for a moment. Bucky knew it was strange, that a wound like that should not look like this, but RJ had a fast metabolism but it was not at all like Bucky or Steve’s. 

“Ok, if you say you are fine…” Sharon said after a moment. “I gotta check the arrests, but can Bucky call me in tomorrow, okay?” 

Bucky nodded and Sharon made her way out; leaving him alone with RJ that looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. 

“What was that?” The kid asked.

“What?”

“Was she up to something?” 

“I don’t think she was up to anything.” but Bucky still couldn’t get his eyes off Sharon that was close by the bus where people were still being loaded. “Let’s just go home.” 

Bucky said and soon they were on their way towards the house on Brooklyn. 

*******************************

RJ had just walked into the library to begin another session with Dr. Samson when Bucky called Steve to their bedroom and said the thing that kept him up all night. 

“Do you think RJ has the serum?” 

“What?” Steve asked with clear confusion on his face. “I honestly thought you called me here to have sex.” 

“What?” Bucky asked this time and Steve just shrugged. “Yesterday, someone hit RJ on the back of his head, not only he acted like nothing had happened a few minutes after it but it’s healing fast.” Bucky decided to keep going and ignore Steve.

Steve sat on the edge of the bed as Bucky stood up talking. 

“I don’t know, don’t think so?” Was Steve’s answer. “I mean, he’s not a usual kid, that’s for sure, but I don’t see anything that would make him a supersoldier.” 

“Well, you didn’t see it in me back on WWII as well.” Bucky said and wished he could take the words back as soon as he saw that Steve had misinterpreted it. “No, not like that!” 

Steve shook his head and waved his hand as he looked down on his feet. “I know what you mean.” He said after letting out a sigh. His voice was rough and he still did not look at Bucky’s eyes. It has been years, but Bucky still knew that he blamed himself for what had happened, maybe if he realized that Bucky was different, faster, better, he would’ve come back and looked for him. But now, it was all maybes. 

“We’ve never met RJ before Hydra, so we don’t know anything about him other than the superficials.” Bucky kept going, trying to push Steve out of his head. “What if they’ve done something with him?”

“But don’t you think he would’ve remembered something?” Steve finally looked at him. “The serum is not something you just take, it changes everything you once were. He would’ve known, right?”

“What if it didn’t work properly? I mean, he still has scars and is not as fast as you and I.”

“So you think he has a Walmart version of the serum in him?” 

“I don’t know? Maybe?” 

Steve ran his hands through his face, looking at Bucky who looked as conflicted as he was. 

“Let’s talk to him. I think that’s the best thing we could do.” 

“You know he does not like to talk about his time in Hydra.” Bucky side-eyed him. 

“If he doesn’t speak, we respect that and move on.”

“Do you think we can do it?” 

“No. But we at least have to try.” 

When they walked out of the bedroom, RJ and Dr. Samson were leaving the library as well, they looked at them walking down the stairs and RJ said “gross.” 

“That’s not-” Steve tried to begin, but Bucky said to him let it go. 

Dr. Samson talked to them for a few minutes, considering the breakdown that had happened last week and gave them a few tips on what they could do to make the boy more comfortable at their house. There was nothing they did not know yet, maybe their own experience with PTSD and Hydra had made them fit them to help someone in this situation. But a question Dr. Samson asked took them back: 

“Do you guys plan on adopting?” 

They had not thought about it until now, RJ had been living with them for almost two months now and had completely walked into their routine. It was already a strange concept for Bucky to go on missions without “his partner” or to watch a movie in the living room without the kid by his side complaining.

“Well, I think you guys should think about it. RJ is adapting quite well with you and I don’t see any other family that could be better for him. He needs a constant and safe place that he can always come back to” Samson spoke calmly. “I see he has a lot of problems and traumas involving foster care and abandonment issues, so I think you should consider it. Not now, but soon.”  

Bucky looked at Steve trying to find an answer in him, but all he saw a reflection of his thoughts on his husband’s face. 

Dr. Samson let himself out of the door, wishing them a good day and telling RJ he would be back next week. The man walked out like he hadn’t said anything at all as he had just stated the obvious. 

Whenever he would go out of the therapy, RJ would be quiet and spend the rest of the day in his room, only getting out only for eating or going to the bathroom. Steve and Bucky had given up trying to bring him to spend time with them after Dr. Samson told them that the kid only needed a moment to process everything and they should respect that. 

Therefore, today was almost impossible for them to talk to RJ about the serum or anything else for the matter. When they heard Rj’s door closing they decided to call Sharon. 

“Carter.”

“Hey, Sharon.” Steve and Bucky greet her on the speaker. 

“Hi, guys. How’s it going?” 

“Fine, we just wanted to talk to you about yesterday.” 

“Oh, yeah. Is RJ fine?” 

“Yeah, it’s almost completely healed and yesterday you seemed suspicious about it.” Bucky brought the subject over. 

“Well, I just don’t think a teenager should heal that fast, it’s almost like you both.” Sharon said and they could hear some worry on her voice. 

“So you think he may have the serum or some version of it?” Steve asked. 

“Steve, I think you guys should bring him over so S.H.I.E.L.D doctors could analyze his blood, just to be sure.” Sharon said and Bucky and Steve looked at each other. “If he has it, he will find out.”

“Thank you, Sharon. We will talk to him about it.” Bucky said and turned off. 

Steve and Bucky looked at each other. They shared a look that spoke more than words ever could and Steve smirked. 

The adoption was another subject they had in mind, but it was better to discuss it only when RJ was better. Bucky knew that Steve was okay with it, or at least had been okay with the boy staying over for the last two months without any complaints and that he wanted RJ to stay away as much as he wanted. Maybe he was wrong, but he didn’t think so.

They tried to make their way into their normal routine, without RJ close by.

At lunchtime, Bucky decided to knock on the boy bedroom’s door. There was no movement behind it or any sign that RJ had heard it, so he decided to open it once he saw it was unlocked.

“I’m coming in.” He announced once he walked into the bedroom and saw RJ laying on the bed, back towards him and facing the wall. “Do you want to eat? Steve made lasagna.”

“I’m not hungry.” Came out muffled.

“Okay.” Bucky looked around. The room was a mess, there was a pizza box near the computer they had given RJ and some clothes on the floor. Bucky loved it. “Do you think you can join us? We like your company.”

“I’m tired from yesterday, I think I’ll sleep.”

Bucky nodded even though he knew that RJ could not see him. “Are you having any headache, dizziness or anything like this?”

“No, I’m fine.” RJ said in a voice carried away with anger and annoyance.

“Okay, I’m leaving, but if you want to talk, we are here.”

Bucky let himself out of the room and met with Steve who was sitting on the kitchen island.

“He’s not feeling well, let’s try another day.”

However, the next day was no better. If RJ left his room, Steve and Bucky did not see. The supersoldiers would walk into the room to bring the boy some snacks or food, but most of the time it would stay untouched until one of them took it out of the room. RJ would avoid looking at them whenever they walked into the room, and only once Bucky saw the boy’s following him out of the room as silent tears slipped out of it and into his pillow.

By the third day, any of them could take it anymore and Bucky had to held Steve back from busting into RJ’s room and dragging him out of there. They had taken a deep breath, calmed themselves, and knocked.

“RJ, could you please come to have dinner with us?” Steve asked.

“We miss you, kid. Just sit on the table and eat a little, is all we are asking.” Bucky added up.

It took the boy a few moments to get up from the bed and stand up, looking at both of them with his usual attitude.

“Happy?” RJ asked and it was the first time they had heard the boy’s voice in almost three days.

“So much. Thank you.” Steve asked and nodded for them to leave.

They sat on the table and the room had a heavy atmosphere in it. Nevertheless, they all decided to make the best of it.

“Hungry?” Bucky asked, offering him food.

RJ nodded and stood quiet during the whole thing, avoiding any kind of eye contact towards them. It was hard for Bucky to ignore it and wait for him to eventually talk about what has been bothering him. 

 “You guys have your serious face, what’s happening?” 

“Something that can wait until you’re better.” 

“I’m fine. I just… I don’t know, I don’t like talking about feelings and stuff, it seems like he puts words in my mouth, but turns out he is occasionally right about it.” RJ explained.

“I know the feeling, kid.” Bucky said looking at him.

“Something in particular that made you so quiet?” Steve pushed a little.

RJ just shook his head. “So, what do you guys want to talk about?”  

“How is your head?” Steve said pointing to the band Aid that covering part of the back of his head.

“Fine, it healed already.”

“No concussion symptoms or anything?”

“Nope.” RJ said.

Bucky and Steve shared a look.

“What?” RJ interrupted.

“Did you always heal this fast?” Bucky asked as calmly as he could.

“No, no, no, no. I know where you are going, just no.” RJ said through wide eyes and shaky breaths.

“RJ, we just think it’s a little bit weird.” Steve tried to reason with him. “I’m sorry if we caused you any distress, we were just wondering-“

“No! You were talking behind my back and were discussing me. I bet you all even have your answer yet.” RJ stood up and paced on the room.

“No, no. I promise you it is not like this, I promise you. Do you trust us?” Bucky asked, standing up as well.

The boy stopped on his tracks. His eyes focused on Bucky and Steve, looked at them, and slowly nodded.

“So I promise you, we did not decide anything on your behalf. Your life is yours and me and Steve can only help you, maybe help you decide something, but we will not decide your future.”

RJ nodded again, this time his eyes watered with tears.

“I’m sorry… I don’t know.” RJ said between shaky breaths. “I don’t know what happened, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, kid.” Bucky came closer and slowly brought RJ into his arms. “It’s okay. Everything is fine.”

When RJ broke the hug he had stopped crying and looked at Steve and Bucky and after a few seconds, he sat back on the chair he was eating previously.

“You guys will leave me eventually, don’t you?” RJ spoke, looking into the ground.

Bucky and Steve looked at each other and quickly they rushed to RJ’s side.

“RJ, we wouldn’t do it. We love you and we want you to stay with us.” Steve started and looked for Bucky for approval.

“We’ve been thinking about starting the adoption process, so you could be with us officially.” Bucky completed Steve’s words and it looked like a pound had just lifted off their shoulder.

RJ looked at them confused as someone could, his eyes did not believe in what he was seeing and his ears had listened everything all wrong.

“Why?” was the sound that came out of his mouth.

“Really? RJ, we have, well at least Steve and I, think we’ve been a family for a while now. So why not make this official?”

         The boy took a huge breathe and looked at the ceiling as his legs were moving up and down.

         “Are you doing this because you pity me?”

         “What? No! RJ… We love you.”

         The boy looked at his shoes.

         “I remembered Colt telling me that I would only deserve love if I got my full potential. Only then someone would love me.”

Steve looked at Bucky, whose face was showing a mixture of anger towards Colt and empathy to RJ.

 “There’s a lot of things that Colt was wrong about, this is one of them. You deserve love, not because you are excellent in missions or because you may have the serum in you. You deserve love because of the amazing kid you are; we would be proud and happy to be your parents.” Steve said and Bucky loved him a little bit more for always knowing what to say.   

“You won’t leave me?” RJ sounded like a little kid frightened by a thunderstorm in the middle of the night, the sound of it broke Bucky’s heart. 

“We don’t plan on that.” Steve assured him. 

There was a moment of silence between them, but this time it was comfortable. Just a moment for them to think about what had happened. 

“I thought you would leave me.” RJ said one more time. 

“Why would you think that?” Bucky asked and RJ just shrugged. Steve remembered what Dr. Samson had said, about RJ needing a safe place to know that he wouldn’t be thrown away after this was no longer a new and exciting thing when this became their normal.

<>
“You’re staying with us until you grew tired of us, kid. We promise you that.” Steve told him and RJ nodded, a few tears escaped his eyes and Bucky and Steve knew that the boy had believed him, now they had to make everything possible to not bring the boy down.
<>