Daylight

Bucky stood by RJ’s bedside every single minute of the day. He would watch over him, paying close attention to the ups and downs of the boy’s chest, catalog every scar on it, the fresh black and blue made by Bucky not even a day ago, some others that were already fading. Steve had cleaned him up a little, but there were still a few blood and dirty on the kid as well.

“I think he will wake up at any minute.” Steve that stood at the doorway with his arms crossed said. “He’s going to need a lot of rest, at least a couple of weeks.”

“Since when did you become a doctor?” Bucky took his eyes off RJ for the first time in hours and looked over Steve with a smile on his face.

“Since I’ve been patching myself up for a few years.”

Bucky chuckled.

“I don’t think he has the serum.” Bucky said after a few minutes of silence. “He has too many scar tissue and bruises for it.”

Steve nodded. At least Hydra didn’t make him his guinea pig.

A cough caught their both attention. And another one, until RJ’s eyes finally started to flutter open. Steve came a little closer to the bed and saw as the boy looked around the whole room, trying to make sense of where he was and what had happened, until his eyes finally found Bucky.

“Hey, buddy.” Bucky said in a soft tone, bringing a smile in Steve’s face.

“Where am I?” RJ’s voice was raspy and Bucky could see his discomfort, so he motioned for Steve to pick a cup of water.

“You are in my place. Well, Steve’s and mine. I think you know him.” Bucky nodded towards Steve, who was offering RJ the glass of water with a smile.

RJ’s eyebrows narrowed in confusion, noticing Steve for the first time. His breathe hitched in surprise only for a moment, but enough for Bucky to see.

“I thought you were dead.” RJ said not taking his eyes off Steve.

“Yeah, many people think that and I would like to keep it like this if possible.”

RJ took the water and drank it, suspiciously.

“How are you feeling?” Bucky asked.

“Tired.”

“RJ, you were shot on the shoulder by that man. You were asleep for a day and you going to need to be on bed rest for a few more. You are welcome to stay here while recovering and-“ Bucky had to take a minute to calm his nerves down and look at Steve, who nodded. If RJ decided that he wanted to leave that was nothing he could do, he would only had to accept that the boy was not ready yet and move on. “And you are welcome to stay here as long as you want.”

Bucky tried to say the words looking into his eyes, appearing as confident as he could, when in reality he was terrified. He saw so much of him in RJ’s that he didn’t allow himself to think that the boy could not want a life away from Hydra. Now, it all was coming in check, reality would be in front of him in a few seconds.

“Why are you doing it? I just tried to kill you. I don’t understand.”

“Well, I don’t think you really wanted to kill me and I know what is like to have your life taken away from you, become someone you can barely recognized, but I also know what is like to that it back.” He looked at Steve for support. “I think you want it too.”

RJ had become quiet on the bed, head hanging low and eyes focusing on his hands.

“I… I don’t think that I can do it.” He said it so quietly that Bucky almost couldn’t hear.

“I think you can. With the right help and support, you can. It won’t be easy, but I and Steve are going to be here for you for whatever you need.” 

“And you are just okay with it?” RJ said looking straight into Steve’s eyes, that didn’t even stutter.

“Bucky really knows how to read people, if he says you are good and deserve a second chance, then you do and I’m 100% in.”

TJ looked back at Bucky, his eyes were wide, like a puppy who was kicked and now was being offered a pet after a long time. Bucky and Steve would need to be strong, to hold it for RJ when he could not.

“Okay.” RJ nodded, looking at his hands again.

“That’s really good RJ.” Bucky smiled and tried to look into his eyes, but all he could see was how tired to kid looked like. “Do you want eat something and then get some rest? Steve made a soup.”

The boy had adjusted himself into the bed, making himself as comfortable as he could. So tired that he couldn’t even speak, only nod.

“I’m gonna grab it.” Steve said and made his way out of the room.

RJ was fast asleep before Steve could make it back.

________________________________

The three of them followed some kind of routine for almost a week. RJ would wake up dazed and tired, Bucky would remind of where he was and what had happened as Steve would provide the both of them whatever he could, sometimes a reassuring nod, a glass of water or a hand on the shoulder. 

By the end of the week, RJ was able to walk around the house, even though he made it to the first floor with some kind of difficulty. This new kind of independence was a blessing and a curse for Bucky. 

“Buck, we have to accept if someday he wakes up and decides to leave. It’s going to be his choice.” Steve told him at the breakfast table on day 08, when Bucky confessed him that he was scared about RJ’s future with them. 

“But Steve, we both know that the best place for him is with us.” 

“I agree with you, but Hydra took everything from him and made him a prisoner, if we keep him here against his will, just because we want, we are no better than them.” 

Bucky closed his eyes and accept the words that came from Steve’s. He knew that his lover was right, a few years ago he decided that the best place for him was back in cryo until someone could free him from Hydra. Steve hated it, tried to talk him out of it, but this was his choice. This small moment was one of the biggest victories in his life. Bucky couldn’t take this out of RJ. 

“Hey, RJ!” Steve greeted the boy that walked into the kitchen with firm steps, looking far away from the kid that got carried into the house.

“Hi.” The first sign that the boy was getting better was that he had hardened himself around them. Without even looking at them, RJ sat on the kitchen counter. 

“Would you like some pancakes?” Bucky asked.  

“Yes.” 

Steve and Bucky shared a look, both of them trying to support the other as they knew that today was going to be a bad day. 

“RJ, me and Steve thought it would be a good idea if you started to see a therapist to talk about what happened.” Bucky began when Steve offered the boy a plate full of pancakes. 

On the few days that they spend together, Steve and Bucky found out that RJ liked his pancakes with syrup and his coffee black. He liked to sleep with two pillows and the comfort of a blanket. TV wasn’t really his thing, but he sat on the couch at night and watched movies with Steve and Bucky. The supersoldiers had learned this little things, buried then into their brain and Bucky wasn’t ready to just let it all go someday. 

“There is nothing to talk about.” RJ said with his mouth full of food. 

“Don’t talk with your mouth full.” Steve reprimanded him in his Captain America’s voice, the boy raised his eyebrows and shrugged but swallowed before speaking again.

“I don’t think I have something to talk.” 

“Well, sometimes we don’t even realize that we have to speak with someone about things that we’ve been until we start. It’s up to you, but we really think this is where you should start.” Bucky said and RJ looked right into his eyes. 

“Seems to me that you have it already figured it out.” 

“No, we don’t. It’s your choice, we are only giving you an option.” Steve assured. 

“Okay.” RJ agreed and went back to his breakfast. 

Steve looked at Bucky and nodded as they share a smile. They had already talked to Dr. Samson, one of the best physiatrics there was, according to Sam. 

The rest of the breakfast went by without any incident and only Steve tried to make a few small talk about they going out to buy clothes for RJ. The boy only nodded. 

Sam kept calling Bucky’s voice during the whole thing, his phone vibrating in the kitchen counter and reverberating on it, catching everyone attention until Steve almost shouted “can you pick it up, please?” 

Bucky accept the call and excused himself. Sam had been wanting for informations about the man with a white suit, right now S.H.I.E.L.D had gotten almost nothing on him. They needed more intel that only RJ could provide. Because of that, Captain America had been calling him nonstop ever since he said that RJ was getting better. 

“Good morning, Sam.” 

“Bucky, you know I hate to do this, but we need answers that this man is just not giving. Could you please talk to your former murder young self?” 

“He has a name, Sam.” 

“Please, man.” Sam actually sounded desperate. Bucky sighed and told him he would see what he could do. 

The problem was that Steve had been reading articles and books about fostering kids for the last few days, specifically on how to build trust and a relationship with someone that had been lied to and betrayed. He wouldn’t admit it, but Bucky found out he even joined a forum with adoptive parents on almost the same situation as they were. His partner would given him resumes on his findings and one of the main worries was that if they asked RJ for information about HYDRA, the kid could think they were only taking care of him because of the knowledge he had. 

When Bucky made it back to the kitchen, he could see that Steve and RJ had listened to at least part of the conversation. 

“If you both want to know something about Hydra, just ask me.” RJ said as soon as he saw Bucky. 

“RJ, we don’t want you to think that you have to give us something. We are happy to have you here with us and you can share what you know when you feel comfortable.” 

“Did you rehearsed it?” RJ asked, and the sass Bucky had once hear was on his voice once again. Bucky couldn’t help but smile when Steve rolled his eyes. 

“What Steve is trying to say is that you only have to tell us what you want, we are okay with whatever you give us, even if it’s nothing.” 

“Well, I don’t have much to say.” RJ said pushing himself back on the chair and crossing his arms and spreading his legs, trying to show them that he was calm and that his whole situation wasn’t bothering him. “I’ve never known my father and my mom died when I was five, so ever since I’ve been on foster homes until one of them turned out to be Hydra.”

RJ stopped for a moment and face the floor. 

“That’s when I met Mr. Colt, it was like two years ago or something. He told me he could help me, that-” The boy had drifted after that, eyes focusing on the floor and thoughts far away. 

Bucky looked at Steve that only signaled him to wait a moment. Like a switch had been turned, RJ was back with his careless act, looking at both of them as his leg bounced in a steady rhythm. 

 “He showed me a few pictures of you, Mr. Barnes. Mr. Colt told me you were the best Hydra ever had, but you were weak and that he would made me better than you.”

Bucky and Steve sighed. 

“Thank you for sharing it.” Steve broke the silence, approaching the boy and putting a hand on his shoulder. RJ looked at him like the touch surprised him, but it was welcomed. 

__________________________________________

They went to buy clothes for RJ later that day. They looked like a small family, Steve and Bucky would occasionally hold hands and watch as RJ walked a few steps in front of them, hands on his pockets as he looked over the windows shops, just like any other teenager. 

“RJ, let’s check this one.” Steve called out as he pointed towards a Urban Outfitters store.

The kid nodded and made his way into the store, Bucky and Steve following close behind. Bucky looked around and decided that he would never buy anything from this place, maybe a short. 

“Really, Steve?” He asked coming from behind Steve that was holding a couple of jeans and some shirts. 

“I saw online that the young people like places like this.” He motion towards RJ that was picking a t-shirt that really looked like something Freddie Krueger would wear. “See? He likes. Defining a style is an import part on his recovery.” 

“I need to take you out of that forum as soon as possible.” 

Steve laughed. 

Turns out RJ’s style was very similar to Bucky’s, practical and comfortable clothes in dark tones. They walked out of the store with a lot of bags that Steve insisted in carrying by himself. By the time they were done, Bucky’s stomach was already complaining, so they made their way towards the food court. 

“What do you want to eat?” Bucky asked to the kid that only shrugged. 

“Burguer? A pizza? You can have anything you want.” Bucky insisted. 

“I’m not hungry.” His tone was serious and took Bucky a moment to realize that ever since they left the store, RJ had shut himself. His eyes were far away, didn’t meet Steve or his. 

Bucky looked at Steve who understood exactly what he wanted to say. This had been too much. 

“I think we can buy some chicken wings and eat them on our way home. Is that good?” Steve tried. 

“Yeah.” Bucky said, trying to hide his disappointment when RJ only shrugged again. 

The drive home was quiet, only Steve tried to engage a conversation, sometimes Bucky would envy how well Steve could handle some tough situations and keep himself going, trying his best to light a mood and made people around him feel safe and good.

They ate, RJ devoured the food and dismissed himself as soon as he was done and went to his room. Steve and Bucky were left cleaning the dishes. 

“Do you think we did the right thing by taking him to the mall?” Bucky asked once they were done and lying on the couch with the TV on, none of them really paying attention to the news. 

“I do. He needed clothes and to know that we think he can handle himself.” 

“Do you think it triggered something? The conversation we had in the morning and then this?” 

“When he is ready, he’ll tell us. Don’t worry.” Steve said as he pushed a strand of hair out of Bucky’s face. “You are doing an amazing job and RJ is lucky to have you.” Steve said and kissed his lips. 

“I just want to help him to get better.” 

“He will, I don’t know if you know but I do have experience in dealing with former Hydra’s assassins.” Steve said with a smirk. 

By the corner of his eyes, Bucky could see a small bundle of black hair and RJ’s blue eyes sneaking out of the hallway and watching the whole scene.