Chapter 5
Nathan had been quick to leave the awkward environment of the dinner, finding himself in the gardens outside and sitting on a stone bench out looking a small pond.
By now, the sky had darkened considerably and the moonlight trickled in through the canopies of the trees. Nathan stared down at his hands in his lap, turning the metal hand over in examination, mind elsewhere. All he could think about was the world he had left behind; now, the soldiers would have to push on without Nathan’s help. Aliya and Hope would be alone and have to fend for themselves.
Had Nathan done the right thing, abandoning the fight?
Part of himself reasoned that leaving his family and his life behind was necessary to prevent the fight here so that none of it would ever happen. But there was that guilt eating away at his insides and crushing his chest; the same kind of guilt he felt when Alex had died. It was suffocating.
And then, there was the possibility of his failure. If Nathan did not succeed, then the future would progress as it has been, only Nathan wouldn't be there to lend his support.
”Hey, Nathan Christopher Longest Name Ever Summers! Fancy running into you here!”
Nathan turned around in his seat to see Deadpool strolling down the path, arms swinging joyfully as he came up to Nathan and plopped himself down next to him. Nathan found himself shifting to the side to make room for Wade, and said automatically, ”Don't call me that.”
Wade shrugged. ”Your dad isn't here, and neither is the genetic blueprint of your to-be mother.” He started to swing his legs, staring out at the vast expanse of the garden.
Nathan exhaled deeply, feeling lighter as he tilted his head up to stare at the glowing crescent moon. ”Thank you.”
Wade tilted his head to the side, fixing a confused look at Nathan as his legs slung gently. ”What for?”
Nathan turned so that he was now facing the other man. ”Back there, at dinner. You doing that helped make the situation a little bit... more bearable... for me. And pulled me out of bad memories. So, thank you.”
Wade stared at Nathan with an indecipherable look in his eyes before he shrugged, an easygoing grin settling on his face. "Well, that's what buddies do for each other! We help each other out, and feel less shitty about ourselves." He stopped, staring down at the ground where his feet had stopped kicking. "I guess you've been through a lot, huh?"
"So have you," Nathan pointed out. Wade sighed, turning in his seat so that he was facing Nathan a little bit more. "Yeah, but to tell you the truth, I've kind of accepted what I am, now. No matter how many jokes I crack or self-deprecate my appearance, I've kind of made peace with who I am. I was already killing people before this shit happened, so I don't have any regrets about the people I've killed. And now, I'm starting to feel a lot better about Vanessa."
At Nathan's disbelieving look, Wade frowned. "Hey, I am! When I got close to dying during the 'Russell Capades,' I talked to her. I guess you could say that I got some closure; but we're not talking about me, we're talking about you. And something tells me that with all the fucked up shit happening there, you didn't get away without a few scratches."
Nathan sighed, slumping back on the bench. "You're not wrong. Some ops were fucked up from the get-go. I can't recall how many people I watched die. Sometimes I knew them, sometimes I didn't. And on the flip side, there were the TO victims we gunned down; at some point, during the fight, I always remember that they used to be people before the virus took over their bodies, and I can't help but feel... hollow." He clenched his teeth tightly, deep in thought once more as Wade whistled. "Damn. That's pretty fucking hardcore," he said, chuckling lightly.
Nathan shot him a look, and the chuckles died out pretty quickly.
"I mean," Wade hastily said to try and save face, "you shouldn't feel guilty for killing those machines. I mean, if they got to the other people, then they'd contract the virus, too. By doing what you did, you saved lives. And that's what you're doing here now! You're here to prevent any of it from ever happening, and you shouldn't feel any remorse or guilt for it. Take it from a guy that rarely feels those kinds of things."
"That's not true, and we both know that," Nathan interjected. "You and I are well aware that you felt regret for Vanessa's death when you were unable to save her, and you also showed remorse for turning Russell away. Maybe I am wrong in feeling bad for the people I left behind, but you shouldn't take things too hard on yourself, Wade."
With that, the time-traveler got up and walked away toward the mansion, leaving Wade to stare at his retreating back.
And that night, as Nathan settled into bed preparing for sleep, he had a feeling that the regular nightmares plaguing his dreams wouldn't be making their appearance that night.
The first sound that Nathan registered as he opened his eyes blearily was running footsteps outside in the hallways.
He was lying on his stomach, one side of his face pressed against the pillow. After shaking off the drowsiness, Nathan felt energized; the lack of haunting and feverish nightmares seemed to have a part in that. Groaning softly as he sat up, his gaze flew to the nightstand by his bed and the digital clock resting on it. A little after nine in the morning, which was extremely late in his standards, but it wasn't like he had anything pressing to do.
Nathan threw the covers off, walking to the bathroom to clean and freshen himself up. When he returned to the bedroom and got dressed, he went to the drawn curtains covering the glass door and opened them, wincing slightly as the harsh sunlight hit his face. Outside in the backyard, children were laughing and playing a soccer game with some of the X-Men supervising them, drinking alcohol in light amounts, and chatting with each other amiably. Nathan couldn't hear anything through the door and instead turned around to exit his bedroom to see Dr. McCoy.
He passed Wade's door on the way there, pausing slightly before it as he debated whether he should invite Wade with him. Although he had disliked Deadpool severely when they had first met, Nathan couldn't help but feel reassured whenever Wade was nearby; it was nice having someone who understood him. But despite this, Nathan turned away and walked past the door and down the stairs. This was a matter concerning himself, and he wasn't sure if Wade would appreciate it if Nathan woke him up for something completely unrelated to him.
Upon reaching Beast's office, Nathan rapped on the door twice in greeting, and the door was promptly opened. The doctor smiled in greeting, making room for Nathan to enter as Hank closed the door behind him shut.
"I'm glad that you're here. Please, sit down," Hank said, gesturing with a blue paw toward a chair at a small circular table. Nathan did as he was told as Beast brought forth a small flat plastic cylinder. Nathan recognized it as the device outlined in the blueprints that had been shown to him the other day. He raised an eyebrow. "You finished it already?"
Hank scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. "Well, I started yesterday and may have worked on it through the entirety of the night. My mind was preoccupied with making this; I haven't worked on anything this complex before. Anyway, I've got this working, I hope," he said, muttering the last part. "I don't know if this actually works at all, so we're going to wait before attaching this to you. Instead, we're going to hook the device up to this machine, which will transfer the energies from the device through these connections to your body. Then, we can go into the Danger Room and take everything for a test run."
Nathan nodded slowly, body tense with anticipation. "Maybe we should bring Jean or Xavier with us; it'll be good to have a telepath on the side just in case."
Beast nodded after pondering over Nathan's request. "It can't hurt. I'll bring the stuff down and alert one of them; you can make your way there and I'll see you in a few minutes."
A quiet "thanks" was uttered by Nathan as he left the office, walking leisurely to the elevator tucked away in the hallway. Within seconds, he found himself on the floor underneath the School, the metal walls and floor shining in pristine condition. Nathan walked down the single hallway slowly, looking at the uniforms displayed on the walls. He had never known that this part of the X-Mansion existed when he visited the decimated building in the future but wasn't surprised to find out it existed. Tangled in old memories and thoughts, Nathan found that he had walked long past the Danger Room entrance and instead was at the end of the hallway at a big single door with a metal "X" engraved on it.
Nathan paused, observing the door in interest as he moved forward to open it and get a glimpse behind the door...
"Not that room, Nathan!"
Jean had walked up to him from behind, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder that prevented him from reacting wildly. He nodded once in greeting before looking back to the door. "What's behind it?" he asked curiously.
"Cerebro," Jean replied instantly. "Professor X uses it to locate lost or dislodged mutant children who have nowhere else to go; he then sends some of us to retrieve them and bring them back here safely. It focuses his telepathic abilities while magnifying them at the same time. I don't have the strength or control to use it - only Xavier can."
Nathan nodded in understanding as he slowly walked away, curiousity satisfied for now. Jean smiled, leading him to the Danger Room and stepping inside. Nathan saw that there had already been props set up; seven large and rectangular tables set apart from each other all around the room with certain items on them, such as a flower vase or a stack of books. Each table had a placard on it with a specific number, labeling the tables from one to seven. Nathan turned to Jean with a confused look but was only received with a small smile and a shrug.
The sound of the door unsealing caused Nathan to turn to the only entrance where Hank had entered, dragging in the machine on its wheels and towards the other two mutants. "Alright, let's get this hooked up to you," he huffed, beckoning for Nathan to remove his shirt. Nathan was quick to do so, then moved to help Beast place the connection pads over the line of connection where flesh met metal, feeling a surge of something foreign as Hank flipped a switch.
The sudden sensation felt like someone had driven their fist into Nathan's stomach, and he reacted in such a manner, bending over and falling to the floor on his knees. Hank made a distressed sound, moving forward to help, but Jean held him back with a raised hand, making her way to Nathan's side and kneeling to his level. "It's a lot, I know; you can let go, Nathan. The machine is doing its job, but you need to let your powers go. There's too much telekinetic and telepathic pushing."
Nathan shook his head through the pain, breathing deeply. All he focused on was the strain his body was undergoing, making his surroundings fuzzy; he thought he could make out the hissing of the door opening and closing, but he wasn't sure. The underlying constant fear that the TO virus would take over his body was nerve-wracking, and he was extremely reluctant to do as Jean was telling him to do. She seemed to pick up on this and placed a comforting hand on his back, rubbing small circles in encouragement. "I know that this might be frightening to you, but if you don't do this, you could end up killing yourself," she said, worry bleeding into the edges of her voice. "Please, Nathan. Just trust me."
Hank was focused on the screen of the machine that was hooked up to Nathan, reading his vital signs. "Heart rate is elevated," he warned. "If he doesn't settle down anytime soon, we'll have to stop."
Shutting his eyes tightly, Nathan gritted his teeth as he ever so slowly started to pull his powers away from the TO virus, letting go of the effort. When he didn't feel the metal shifting over his skin, he continued to retract more and more of his power, until the pain started to ebb away and the beeping of his heart rate from the monitor started to slow and reach a more steady beat.
Jean kept her hand on Nathan's back, closing her eyes in concentration. "The machine is working; the barrier is holding and is stable," she announced. Hank sighed in relief as Nathan slowly stood up shakily. His powers were now resting dormant in his body, and the feeling was foreign to him. It felt as though a part of him had been missing for a long time, and it had finally been returned to its rightful place. He lifted his hands, looking at the left arm and down his chest. The metal didn't shift at all; it stayed still, and he felt the fear and stress slowly leave his body.
"I'm alright," he said, after Jean had questioned him about how he was feeling. "It feels a little odd, but nothing hurts."
She nodded in satisfaction, grinning slightly. "Well, that's one part out of the way. Let's see how strong you are." She pointed to the tables set out in the room, pointing to Table 1. "Slowly lift up that one. If you feel strained, you can just let it drop; I had trouble lifting things when I first started, too," she said.
Nathan turned his head to the left-most table, adorned with a small folded tablecloth in the center. He held out his left hand in concentration, focusing on projecting his energy at the table. Immediately, it was engulfed in a bright blue aura before it was slowly lifted into the air, continuing to move upward as it almost touched the ceiling. Behind him, he could hear Hank muttering something to Jean, but ignored it in favor of concentrating on his task.
"How... do you feel right now?" Jean asked carefully, gaze tilted upward.
"I'm feeling fine," Nathan replied, still looking at the table in the air. "I don't feel tired at all."
Jean nodded slowly, mouth open slightly. "Well, that's... great." Nathan could hear something in her tone of voice that gave him pause. "Is there something wrong?" he asked slowly.
"Nathan... look at the other tables," Jean said, the last part of her sentence coming out in a hushed voice.
He did as she told him to, scanning the floor of the room for the other tables where he had seen them last. He was surprised to see that they were no longer on the ground, and turned behind him to look at Jean and Hank, who were both staring up at the ceiling in a wide direction. They seemed to be looking in two corners of the room. Frowning, Nathan turned to follow their gazes upward, eyes widening when he saw the scene that had them silent.
The other six tables - along with their decorations - had been lifted upward in a similar fashion as the table that Nathan had intended to lift in the beginning; they were all encompassed with the same blue aura, the aura that signified Nathan's power manipulating the objects.
He was about to say something when a sharp pain struck him in the back of his head, and he removed his hand to clutch his head in agony. The tables came crashing down to the floor, breaking on impact immediately. Jean and Hank rushed to Nathan's side as he lay on the ground, groaning in pain. "What's wrong with him?" Beast asked in concern.
"Step away, please," a third voice unrecognizable to Nathan's ears at that point sounded out. It took all of his focus to hear it; all he could hear was the chaos of unfiltered voices that seemed to come in from everywhere. It was overwhelming, and his fingers dug deeper into his scalp as he tried to shut it all out, eyes open wide and staring up at the blank ceiling.
His view was obstructed when a face that wasn't Jean's or Hank's came into Nathan's vision. Xavier. The telepath in the wheelchair smiled sympathetically, and Nathan could feel his mind converge with his. Hello, Nathan.
Charles. Nathan found that he was communicating with the Professor without speaking verbally. It's too loud.
I know, and I am sorry, Nathan. Charles' eyes softened. I will have to help you in the next couple of days with your telepathic powers. Yours are extremely powerful; you are displaying power greater than Jean did. For now, I need you to bring your powers back to their previous task of blocking the techno-organic virus; Hank is currently powering off the machine.
Okay. Nathan closed his eyes and focused on projecting his powers to fight against the TO virus, not feeling the pain he experienced earlier when the machine had turned on. He lay still on the ground, no longer writhing in pain and slowly removed his hands from his head. Cautiously, Nathan pushed himself onto his feet, meeting Jean's and Hank's faces. He nodded slowly. "I'm okay. The voices were overwhelming," he replied.
"Nathan is a special case," Xavier claimed as he stepped in to explain so that Nathan could recover. "Whereas you and I had been living with these abilities since we were children and slowly became accustomed to them as they grew in strength," he said, directly addressing Jean, "Nathan didn't have that same luxury. He didn't have the chance to grow into his telepathic or telekinetic abilities, which is why he was unable to only lift one table and the voices are affecting him to such a great extent."
Jean nodded in understanding. "He's extremely powerful," she remarked, studying Nathan as he pulled his shirt back on. "He's going to need help suppressing his powers after we go through with the surgery. On the bright side, the machine clearly works."
Xavier nodded, turning back to face Nathan. "We can implant the device today and I can begin to teach you how to control your powers if that is what you want. If you would like to wait, we can do this tomorrow."
Nathan shook his head. Despite the trouble with controlling his powers, Nathan had felt exhilarated when he saw the tables hovering in the air; it reminded him that he no longer had to worry about the TO virus, and that feeling of freedom was absolute bliss. Nathan didn't want to continue living in constant fear for the rest of his life; not when there was something he could do about it. "No. Let's do the surgery today," he said firmly, his mind already set.
When Nathan opened his eyes, he found himself back in the infirmary on a similar stretcher he woke up in before, groggy from the anesthetic that had put him to sleep for the procedure. He slowly sat up, clutching his head as he was afflicted with a normal headache. Frowning, his right hand flew up to his neck, feeling for and quickly finding the incision in his skin with the small device inserted underneath the skin.
Because he had been unconscious, his control over his powers had been relinquished, and they remained dormant within him, for now. That was probably for the best, seeing as he was unable to fully control them within an acceptable boundary. Nathan shifted so that he was sitting on the edge of the bed, detaching himself from the EKG machine. He removed the hospital gown and donned his clothes once more before leaving the room and heading back upstairs to where the others were.
Nathan quickly navigated his way through the crowds of students flocking the hallways to get to their next class, heading to Xavier's office immediately as his anxiety started to build, worrying about a sudden telepathic episode happening.
”Pris-cilla!”
”Oh, fuck,” Nathan cursed under his breath as he started to walk faster, his feet trying to carry him away from Wade as fast as he could. It was ultimately all in vain, as the merc easily caught up with him and walked backward with Nathan’s fast-walking pace. ”Why are you avoiding me?” Wade asked, tone sounding genuinely hurt that it almost made Nathan stop in his tracks completely. ”Was it something I said last night? Did I overstep my boundaries? Whatever it was, I'm sorry, okay? I don't wanna push you away; you're the only friend I've got around here. And before you say anything, Colossus doesn't count! That Balls of Steel motherfucker keeps getting sent out on missions to kidnap kids and bring them here.”
Nathan exhaled nervously, a hand lifting up to his forehead as his forefinger and thumb pinched the bridge of his nose. ”Wade, I can't talk right now; I'm kind of in a bad spot. No, you did not do anything wrong. Yes, we're still friends. I’m having some issues with my newfound powers, and I need to get to Xavier,” Nathan said hurriedly as he rushed down the hall. Had he referred to Wade as a friend? He supposed it was what they were at this point, with everything that had happened last night. But then again, Nathan wasn't giving this much thought.
Wade’s eyes lit up behind his mask. ”Whoa, your powers are back! That's great; are you as strong as your evil clone, Stryfe? He's an asshole, but super OP as fuck. Does this make you an omega-level mutant, now? C’mon, man! Dish out the ’deets!!!”
Nathan let out another strangled breath as he felt the corners of his mind start to break from an unseen pressure. ”Wade, I can't talk now. I'll see you later, okay?” He was now running, frantically trying to close the distance between himself and the Professor. As he walked into the lobby where Xavier's office door stood on the wall, Nathan collapsed onto the ground, letting out a strangled cry as he clutched his head for the second time that day. His whole body trembled, making it look to the casual observer like he was going through a seizure.
I wonder if he likes me.
This is SO boring.
Should I get ice-cream or a milkshake?
OMG, Professor Logan is so hot in that flannel shirt.
Damn, no service. Now I can't text Raquel.
WHOA!!! What the HELL happened to YOU, man? You fucking RaN oFF on mE, Priscilla.
Nathan’s vision was starting to blur, and his hearing was impaired with the constant flood of others’ thoughts running through his mind, but somehow, his mind happened to fixate on what he immediately recognized to be Wade’s. It was almost funny how he was unable to read Wade before, but it was much easier to do it now.
Damn, I guess I gotta carry you to Xavier, huh? Nathan felt himself getting slowly lifted and thrown over Wade’s back. UrGH! What the hell did you EaT for BreAKfaSt, man? You weigh more than my cat, Polynesian. Like the sauce, only less sweet-like. I swear, there was SOMETHING wrong with that cat; that is, if it even WAS a cat. I mean, what kind of cat doesn't like CaTniP? It's too bad I couldn't get him high, I thought we could be druggy-buddies or something...
Nathan focused on Wade’s thoughts, the constant thinking allowing him to stay tuned to Wade instead of breaking away to hear the thoughts of the rest of the world. Nathan could sense Wade freeing a hand to turn the knob of a door and the muffled sounds of people talking; all Nathan could hear was the prattle of Wade’s head.
Hello, Nathan. I'm going to try and stop the flow of the thoughts you can hear. Just hold on a little longer.
Nathan gasped as the thundering volume of voices slowly began to subside, lowering in volume before almost disappearing entirely. They were still there, but it was more so a soft buzzing than a crescendo of a live orchestra. He found that he was sitting on the floor, and got back onto his feet with Wade supporting his arms. Once Nathan was able to stay stable on his feet, he looked down at Xavier, who had his mouth set determinedly and a serious look in his eyes.
”Well, I believe that this is a good time to begin. Shall we, Nathan?”