Misguided Ghosts

“Wilhelm, you have to go.”, the voice of his colleague surprises Wilhelm who cannot help looking at her with wide eyes, completely surprised to see her there.

“What the fuck, Roxanne?”, he answered, still surprised not only by the presence of his colleague but also by what she says. He quickly observes the singer on stage, to be sure that nothing is going to happen to her, and he turns to his colleague again. With her long red hair pulled back in a ponytail and her stern features, she really looks like a stereotypical bodyguard compared to him. “ Why do I have to go? I did everything as in the apprenticeship, and I followed all of Saphir's orders.”

“You have to go back to the office, I think you'll be sent on another assignment.”

“Does Saphir know this?,” Wilhelm frowns suspiciously as his gaze returns to the stage, scanning the surroundings from his position on stage right. He quickly presses his earpiece, connecting it directly to Saphir's on the other side. “Saph?”

“Hey Wille!,” the other man's voice rings in his ear, “You have to go back to the office.”

“Have I done something wrong?”

“Absolutely not. I had the boss on the phone. I told him that you have been perfect all week, he asked for help on a last minute assignment and he wanted my opinion on you. It's your first big job, Wille, be as professional as you were with me.”

Wilhelm remains silent for a long time, apparently stressed. He breathes deeply, letting his anxiety run all over for a minute, then he removes his earpiece to give it to Roxanne, who immediately puts it on and gets in touch with Saphir, who updates her on the entire progress of the mission. He exits the concert hall as quickly as he can, turning his phone back on to text his boss saying he'll be there in about thirty minutes.

Why is he suddenly being sent on another mission in the middle of an ongoing one? What would justify such a change in the program, knowing that their schedules are set to the millisecond at least a month in advance. He books a taxi on the way using an app, then he sighs as he puts his phone back in his pocket.

He takes his pack of cigarettes out of his suit pocket. The singer's voice is less strong here, so less annoying for him who hates loud noises. The fresh air outside makes him feel a bit better, it helps his anxiety to drop slowly while he lights a cigarette. It's a strange addiction, tobacco, he would never have thought he would need it before having this weird idea of becoming a bodyguard.

He takes the time to observe this street in Stockholm while waiting for that damn taxi to arrive. He is restless, he is constantly forced to move to let an impressive diversity of people pass. Wilhelm always liked that, seeing all kinds of different people. It's something that has always brought him a lot of comfort, without really knowing why.

When he sees his taxi coming, he extinguishes his only half-finished cigarette and throws it in a trash can, then he climbs inside and gives the address of the office. His phone vibrates, so he pulls it out of his pocket. It's a text.

Saph:

Don't screw it up, man. Be serious, if you succeed in this mission you could quickly climb the ranks.

Me:

No pressure, of course.

Saph:

No pressure.

Wilhelm chuckles. Saphir was the first to see potential in him when he began training as a bodyguard. He took him under his wing, taught him to fight like them, how to effectively keep watch, where and how to stand. In their free time he even taught Wilhelm how to shoot, more for fun than for their job.

But this also explains why he is so anxious now. He always worked with Saphir. From the very beginning, Saphir had to take Wilhelm with him on every mission, and Wilhelm had loved this, because he felt comfortable around his friend. Their friendship is also a good thing for the work, because they understand each other quickly and efficiently.

He puts his phone away when the taxi pulls into the street of the offices, and he takes out a generous sum of money to pay for his fare before getting out of the car to go back to the office. Anxiety is high, but Wilhelm has learned over the years to show nothing at all, he is used to dealing with such anxiety.

He never really had a choice though. Anxiety has always been a part of him, like a second skin. Always being pressured by his parents, fear of not knowing what to do with his life, of not knowing how to manage his own person in a world that seems so vast to him. He was afraid several times of losing himself.

The corridors are familiar to him, he directly climbs the stairs to the fifth floor. He has become much more athletic since following Saphir's training plan. Barely twenty years old, but Wilhelm is probably one of the most promising recruits the office has ever had, even if he refuses to accept these words when his friend says them.

He knocks on the boss' office, who comes to open the door with his serious air. Wilhelm walks into the room to stand straight in front of him.

“Wilhelm, I'm glad to see you're okay. It has been a few days since we have seen each other.” , his boss is nice to them as long as they are obedient and seriously fulfill the missions.

“I was on the Ruby mission, she is in Sweden for the first time.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You know I hate the unexpected in our programs too, but sometimes being a good bodyguard is also having to adapt, I guess.”, his boss gives him a slight smile, which Wilhelm politely returns, keeping the silence. “Sit down, Wilhelm.”

He wisely obeys, sitting in front of the desk, which his boss sits on to be closer to him. “It's gonna be a little bit different of a job this time, Wilhelm. You will be in the foreground.”

“What do you mean?”

“I know it's not 100 percent your domain, but one of the teams needs another bodyguard. In close custody. You will be the only one to be constantly in contact with the person to be protected.”

“Why didn't you send Roxanne? I've never done that by myself.”

“I know. But I trust you, and you have to be given more responsibilities.”

Wilhelm sighs. The weight of this responsibility frightens him strangely, it's like drowning in a whole new adrenaline rush, but also terrible anxiety. “Any other reason for choosing me?”

“He's your age. It's easier for everyone, it will allow you to be around him while passing for someone close to him.”

“I have to take him from one place to another?”

“Not really…” , his boss walks around the office, grabbing a file and opening it to put it in front of Wilhelm. Intrigued, he bends down to read the lines.

“...Wait, but this is a mission of several weeks?”

“Yes, Wilhelm. You will follow him while he's doing some concerts in different countries. I know what you're going to say, but given your position you can't afford to refuse this mission, especially since you know that they're well paid.”

Wilhelm sighs. He knows perfectly well that he is right, he cannot refuse. But he still hesitates.

“See the good side... You can choose your partner for the mission.,” his boss is now looking at him more intensely, as if he wanted to urge him to answer.

For a moment, Wilhelm stays still. Not that he is still thinking about saying no, he knows that he will have to do it, whether he likes it or not. But who can he ask to accompany him, if not Saphir? 

Wilhelm closes the file and pulls it into his lap. He takes a quick look at his boss, then nods, looking at his watch. “I'll leave you, I barely have six hours to get home, take a shower, pack a bag and reach the starting point.”

“I knew I could count on you. Good luck, Wilhelm.”

He refrains from bringing to light the fact that he doesn't really have a choice, and walks out of this office and into his own, picking up his service gun, a new earpiece and its twin, and he goes through to Adriana's office. He throws her the second earpiece, which she wisely catches.

“Hello to you too, Wille!”

“Look for the 374576 folder on the computer, Addy. You're leaving with me in 6 hours!”

“FINALLY I'm out of this office! Thank you, Wille!,” the big smile of his Spanish colleague makes Wilhelm laugh, right before he takes out his car keys.

“You check that the whole course is safe and that we are ok on the mission and you call me if necessary, okay?” Wilhelm gives her a nod, then a wink, before leaving the office to go downstairs.

Oh, he knows that this choice, Adriana, will probably be a surprise for everyone. But Wilhelm remembers what his colleague told him a few months earlier. “No one has wanted me as their partner since the accident.” 

And he remembers how unfair he thought it was when this bright little woman explained to him that there had been a car accident during a mission with Roxanne, and that Adriana had had to stop working for weeks because she had gotten injured. Roxanne returned to work the day after the accident, so everyone assumed that Adriana was faking it, or that she was taking advantage of the situation.

The idea did cross Wilhelm's mind too, at the time… Until Adriana showed him the scars on her hip, which run down to her thigh. It was on her side that the other car crashed into theirs. Adriana was in the front row of the impact.

If no one wants her with them, he will. Because he has already trained with her, and he knows that she is methodical and efficient. And with her talkative and so empathetic nature, the mission will be less difficult for him.

Being around her is always easier.

He joins the underground car park to get into his car. It is only there that he takes the time to rub his chest, then his face to calm his anxiety. He wanted to do this job for adventure after all…

— ✰ — 

Wilhelm's apartment is such a small space. It's not even very personal or decorated. The only somewhat personal objects found there are his snowglobes and his large throw blanket with a frog depicted in the middle that is always on his bed. On the other hand everything is very tidy, stored exactly in its place, which surely helps in such a small place. But he likes living here.

When he comes out of his bathroom in a t-shirt and sweatpants, he closes something that is in his hand and puts it in his suitcase which is still open on the floor. He'll close it when he wakes up tomorrow. He sits on his bed, sighing slightly. Wilhelm then opens the file, to finally be able to study it in more detail. It is a tour of the capitals of six different countries, Sweden comes last, after Spain, France, England, Ireland and Norway.

“At least I'm going to see different things…”, Wilhelm tries to stay positive as he reads the file carefully, then turns a page to find a name.

Simon Eriksson.

“Oh fuck-”, Wilhelm frowns, “since when do you go on tour?”

Stunned, Wilhelm freezes on the name for a long moment, then he shakes his head. Eriksson is a common last name in Sweden, and there must be a lot of Simons… No, no chance that it's that Simon. And even if so, what would this change? Nothing. The Simon Eriksson he knew never gave him the time, and it was deserved, all those rich kids treated him like shit at the school they were in.

Thinking about that brings back memories to Wilhelm. Not necessarily good memories.

He only attended one year at Hillerska because of his family, a couple of rich and famous lawyers who thought it was the best for their son but obviously forgot the most important thing about raising a child: to love them.

And to accept them, along the way. Because when Wilhelm hypothesized that he wasn't 100% straight, when he was barely seventeen, his father stopped talking to him and his mother asked him to leave. He left the school he hated, tried to find something else to do and one evening he came across Saphir, who was his greatest chance.

If he chose this profession it is also to do something different of his parents. Their job is boring in his eyes, while Wilhelm dreams of escaping routine, of going on adventures, of a busy and exciting lifestyle.

That's probably also why Felice remained his only friend from Hillerska. His desire for freedom is far from the stupid concerns of all those other rich children who only dream of getting their hands on their parents' fortune and to build theirs even greater. But what's the point of sleeping in silk sheets if you're unhappy there?

One thing that Wilhelm doesn't understand and which completely distances him from the false friends he had been able to make in that stupid school, is the fact that all these young people will have won everything in life without building anything by themselves. Working hard is not in their plans, improving themselves is not in their dreams. They have already been living like happy retirees since the first minute of their existence, with a future all mapped out for them in advance.

How could he accept that?

He couldn't.

His parents knew early on that Wilhelm would not follow in their footsteps. That he wouldn't become a lawyer like them, unlike his perfect brother.

Erik has always agreed to be the perfect prodigal son. He put aside the least of his desires, forgot to live, and put his parents' dreams in place of his own. Despite the fact that they always got along well, Wilhelm always showed that he disagreed with his choices.

But Wilhelm was also betrayed by his brother. When his parents kicked him out, he called Erik to find a place to sleep for the first few days. He never got an answer.

Erik was like his parents, after all.

Wilhelm huffs and puts the folder away in his suitcase too, then he lies down in his bed. Four hours of sleep is all he'll get, so he might as well stop stirring up the memories. He turns off the light and turns on his side.

— ✰ — 

The ringing of his alarm clock hurts his head so Wilhelm quickly turns it off but sits up to avoid falling back asleep. He sighs, running a hand to his temple and through his hair as he looks around. He unplugs his phone, which had been charging all night, and his earpiece, which he puts in place in his ear, leaving it turned off, then he gets up to dress completely, including his service gun. He knows the day is going to be long.

His phone rings, he answers it instinctively while turning on his coffee machine, “Mhm?”

“Willeeeeee!”

“Oh hey Addy! Ready to go?”

“You kidding right? Of course I am!!! I wanted to leave this fucking office so bad, it's been months now. And you're gonna make me travel the world with you! Thank you so much, Wille.”

“That's okay. If I have to do it I can at least do it with someone I really trust.”

“And you? Are you ready? We have to be at the airport in an hour, you'll have to stay by his side.”

“Yeah I know…”, he grunts, taking his coffee to take a sip of the hot liquid and try to wake up as well.

“You are so lucky, Simon Eriksson!!!! I would kill to be next to him.”

Wilhelm winces. “Maybe that's a bit radical…” , he cleans his kitchen and continues to take a sip from his coffee from time to time, while Adriana launches into a long explanation of why it's great to be a part of this tour and how beautiful and talented Simon is.

Honestly, even if Wilhelm doesn't share her enthusiasm (probably due to stress), that's exactly why he chose Adriana as his partner for this mission. She's always radiant, it seems like she never has bad days, or is just really good at hiding them. If they have to look natural around this Simon, he’s better off with her at his side. Wilhelm manages to feel natural when she's around him, and she speaks for two, which is always easier knowing that he is not very sociable.

“Adriana, you're gonna have to focus a little bit, okay? I really need you on this mission.” , Wilhelm smiles slightly, she's so adorable it's hard to say something bad to her, even on the phone.

“No, I mean- yes! Of course! We'll meet at the airport, I'll give you the detailed plan there because my seat on the plane is a few rows behind yours.”

“Alright, I'll be there in thirty-five minutes.”

She makes a strange happy sound just before hanging up and Wilhelm books a taxi then puts his phone away to finish his coffee and wash his cup before leaving his apartment with his suitcase.

The journey to the airport is complicated for him, he restrains himself from biting his nails nervously. It's only when his phone beeps that he finds something to keep his hands busy.

Saph:

you got this.

Me:

I chose Adriana as my partner, so it should be fine.

Saph:

at least it's better than Roxanne...

Me:

hahahhhjj she's not that bad

Saph:

she was a doberman in her past life

Me:

damn that's quite possible

Saph:

not too anxious?

Me:

i've had worse, i'm flying to Spain soon

Saph:

I believe in you

Me:

Thank you, Saph, I have to go. I'm at the airport, the serious things begin!

He doesn't even try to find out if Saphir is going to answer, they know from their jobs that their personal phones aren't always active anyways. So he turns off his phone and puts it in the pocket of his long coat. He gets out of the taxi once in the drop-off area and picks up his suitcase to roll it into the airport. From there, someone takes it from him and he follows Adriana to a side room to talk about the plan together. He will literally be with this Simon all the time, while she will be working with the various securities in the different locations, she will only be with them at times, when they'll have to be outside or to take over for Wilhelm.

When they reach the boarding gate, Wilhelm turns on his earpiece so that Adriana can reach him in case she needs it, since she will be in another class. He waits patiently, staring at the bright billboards, trying to breathe calmly to release his anxiety.

“Hey!”, the voice behind him calls out to him, so Wilhelm turns around, and his gaze falls on a face he recognizes. Fuck. He remains disturbed for a second before his neutral face comes back.

It is indeed the Simon who was at Hillerska at the same time as him, and now that he knows that, Wilhelm is convinced that this is why he was put on this mission. His boss leaves nothing to chance. He recognizes him because Simon sang with Felice in the school choir. And because his voice has always transcended Wilhelm.

Wilhelm has grown a bunch of centimeters since, their height difference is quite amusing when he thinks about it. He can smell the notes of orange blossom and coconut floating around Simon. Some things never change.

“Mr. Eriksson, we're going to be late.”

“No te preocupes, lo tengo controlado.,” hearing him speak Spanish, Wilhelm is even more eager to swap places with Adriana. Probably because he doesn't understand a word of Spanish. But he avoids showing his nervousness, because Simon doesn't seem to recognize him. And that'sgood.

They board the plane, and Wilhelm lets Simon pass so that he is in the window seat, for safety. Wilhelm sits down too, shifting his shoulders to try to be comfortable. He gets up again to take off his coat and puts it on his lap as he observes the people around them.

“I'm sitting next to a smelly old ass woman.” Adriana's voice in his earpiece has Wilhelm biting his lip to keep from laughing.

“Are you all right?,” Wilhelm turns his head to Simon, who frowns after asking his question.

“Yes, yes. My colleague is just saying dumb things.”

“She should've sat with us.”

“That's not really how it works, Mr. Eriksson.”

“Woah, can we call each other by our first names? I feel like I'm a thousand years old and I must admit that all of this is already very overwhelming for me. If it's ok for you, of course?”

Wilhelm leaves a silence. This is the first time he has faced such a young artist, Simon is just nineteen, they only have a few months age gap, no wonder everything seems overwhelming to him, this world is huge and he is lost in the middle of it all. He clears his throat.

“Okay.”

“So… I'm Simon.”

“It would be unfortunate if I didn't know this information…” Wilhelm looks away with a smile as he watches the stewardess do her usual spiel. “Wilhelm.”

Simon smiles, Wilhelm can feel it. A strange feeling takes hold of him, as if he was very close to something dangerous and hypnotizing for him. He nervously plays with his fingers as the plane takes off, hoping that Simon will quickly find something to do on his own to avoid the awkward silence between them.

And indeed, he can see him taking out his phone and putting a wired earphone in his ear, presumably to put on some music, except to his surprise, he offers the second one to Wilhelm, who hesitates.

“We're stuck together for three weeks, we could at least make it nice, Wilhelm, right?”

Wilhelm watches him carefully. His face is magnificent, with the years that have passed, Simon has had a glow up even though he was already incredibly handsome when he was sixteen years old. He doesn't regret having given him his real first name rather than his nickname, because it sounds so good in Simon's mouth that if he had called him Wille he would have lost all sense for professionalism. Always keep a certain distance from the person to be protected.

But at the same time Simon is right, they can at least make the time together nice. Without being too close. Wilhelm dodges the sublime gaze of the singer, he changes his earpiece from one ear to the other, and thereafter takes the second wired earphone.

“I don't know what kind of music you like, but personally I listen to a little bit of everything... I hope that won't be weird for you?”, it sounds like a question.

“I'm not complicated Simon, put on whatever you like.”

The second is satisfied with this answer and a Spanish song goes into his ear. Maybe he should have clarified what not complicated meant after all. The irony of the situation fails to make him smile but he is used to remaining impassive while Bad Gyal or whatever continues to sing verses of Fiebre in his ear.

He notices the signs of anxiety shown by Simon at his side, but he knows that by agreeing to call each other by their first names he has already broken part of the ultimate rule: you don't become friends with those you protect. So he doesn't say anything.

At some point, Simon falls asleep on his shoulder, and Wille doesn’t move. Simon's fruity smell soothes him. He has to admit that his kindness touches him, as if his mere presence was enough to keep the dark clouds at a distance. For now.

Breathe, Wilhelm. This mission doesn't look so bad after all.