‘Come on Einstein, it’ll be fun!’ Peter hears echoing through his head as he stares at the familiar face in front of him.
The pale blue eyes looking back at him make Peter feel nauseous. His vision goes blurry, his heart pounds deafeningly in his ears, his breathing grows shallow and unsteady. Every cell in his body is screaming at him to move, but he’s stuck.
Years have passed since Peter last saw Skip. The memories of what the man did to him were never forgotten, but with time they had faded. It was no longer a cause of his frequent nightmares. Peter doesn’t flinch anymore when someone unexpectedly touches him. He hasn’t thought about the crude things the man would say to him in over a year.
He was getting better, moving on, coping with the fact that it happened without letting it define who he is.
Key word being ‘was’, because seeing the familiar face tore down the progress Peter had made. It brought him back to the very beginning when he could still feel the man’s rough touches anytime he closed his eyes, sending a sickening shiver down his spine at the thought of it.
“Are you okay?”
The voice snapped Peter back to the present, pulling him from his thoughts. Blinking to clear his vision, Peter quickly glanced at Skip who was still standing a few feet away before turning his attention back to the woman in front of him.
“Sorry, I-I’m fine.” He responded shakily, trying to focus back on the task at hand. The building, right. Gotta clear the building. “W-we need to go.”
Reaching out his hand to the woman, Peter thought through what to do next. He could lower the woman from the window which would save him from having to go down and then back up, but at the same time, taking her down would give him a few seconds away from Skip that he could use to prepare himself for having to carry the man down. Yeah, that sounds like a better option.
Correction, it would have been the better option, if the building hadn’t collapsed around them.
“HELP! SOMEBODY HELP US!”
Wincing at the loud noise, Peter lifted his head to see why someone was yelling. His head aches and spins as he cracks his eyes open, the darkness of his surroundings making it harder to see where he is. Gasping in pain, Peter looks at his shoulder, shocked to see a large metal pipe piercing straight through his skin. He stares at the gory sight, blinking slowly, watching blood seep past the pole.
What the hell happened?
“Spider-Man! You’re awake.” Shifting his gaze, Peter sees a woman covered in dust sitting a few feet from him. She has a nasty cut on her forehead, a steady stream of blood trickling down the side of her face.
“What...what happened?” He asks, his words slurring together.
“The building collapsed.”
Not again.
Peter would be lying if he said that wasn’t his first thought. It was quickly replaced with panic as the reality of their situation sunk in. He was, once again, trapped under a building. But this time he had two people with him.
Wait. Two people...Where’s Skip?
Without thinking, Peter jerked his head to the other side to look for the man, quickly stopping as the pounding in his head became overwhelming.
“Careful.” The woman quickly said. “You hit your head pretty bad. Don’t move too much.”
“What’s your name?” Peter questioned after the searing pain faded. He felt bad constantly referring to her as ‘the woman’.
“Kasey Simmons.” She answered and Peter nodded.
“Where is Skip?”
“How do you know my name?”
Slowly turning his head, Peter saw Skip on the other side. He messed up. He hadn’t been thinking straight, his head still spinning a little. Shit. “I..uh..”
“Nobody has called me ‘Skip’ in years.” Skip said, squinting his eyes at Peter as if it’ll help him see through his mask. “Actually, the last person to call me Skip was…” He paused, his eyes growing wide, and a smirk turning the sides of his lips up. “Einstein.”
For the second time that day, Peter froze. Out of all the people to find out his identity, Skip Westcott is at the bottom of that list.
When Skip was Peter’s babysitter - when he raped Peter - he would use threat after threat to keep Peter quiet. His favorite method was telling Peter that his aunt and uncle wouldn’t love him if they found out how dirty he was. And as an eight year old, Peter believed him, keeping it a secret until Skip’s family moved. Ben and May never knew.
Knowing Peter’s secret identity gives Skip more ammunition to force Peter into submission, and by the glint in his eyes, Peter can tell that the man is thinking the same thing.
Peter didn’t have any warning before Skip army crawled over, tugging his mask off, confirming his identity. Peter tried to move his arms to stop him, but with the pole still impaling one of his shoulders, and his other arm pinned down by some of the fallen rubble - which, how the hell did he not notice that before? - he couldn’t do anything to stop Skip.
Unable to move, Peter did his best to glare at Skip, warning him to back off. He heard the woman, Kasey, curse and comment on his age, but he ignored her, not taking his eyes off Skip.
“I think it’s my lucky day.” Skip laughed, moving even closer to Peter. “I’ve been waiting for the day I would see you again. When my parents made us move, I was so sad that I wouldn’t be able to play with you anymore.”
“Stop.”
“Are you still trying to convince yourself that you didn’t enjoy our time together?” The man continued forward, ignoring Peter’s demands. “No matter how much you deny it, your body always gave you away, Einstein.”
“Don’t call me that.”.
Sighing, Skip placed a hand on Peter’s thigh, rubbing circles with his fingers. “Or what? You’ll tell on me?” He mocked, sliding his hand higher. “Who are you gonna tell, Einstein? You’re uncle is dead, and your aunt would be so ashamed of you.”
“Fuck you!” Peter yelled, wiggling in an attempt to free his arm. If he can just get the rubble off, he’ll be able to push Skip back.
“Oh, I’d love to fuck you again.”
“Stay away from him!” Kasey screamed, her voice cracking with fear. Peter glanced at her for a second, seeing the terrified look in her eyes and the tears running down her cheeks. She was inching closer to them, but Peter noticed how her legs were covered in bruises and bent at unnatural angles.
He opened his mouth to tell her to stop, not wanting her to injure herself further, but before he could make any noise, Skip hit her over the head with a rock, instantly knocking her out.
“What the hell?” Peter seethed, turning his attention back to Skip who was now straddling his hips.
“You’re still as feisty as I remember. That’s why I liked you so much.”
“Skip, get off! Don’t touch me.”
Shrugging, Skip let his eyes travel up and down Peter’s body. “Sorry, Parker. I just can’t help myself.”
Peter felt his whole body jerk as Skip grabbed his thighs tighter than before, his nails digging into the material of his suit. “No! Stop!”
Laughing loudly, Skip continued to roam his hands across Peter’s body, squeezing and groping at random, ignoring Peter’s protests. “What kind of superhero are you if you can’t even protect yourself?”
Tears slid silently down Peter’s cheeks, feelings of being weak and useless running through his head. There is nothing he can do to stop what’s happening. Even his body is starting to tire out, the stress from saving people and the injuries from the building making it harder for him to keep fighting.
As Skip continued his assault, Peter could feel his mind slipping, taking him to the imaginary space, he made up before. It was like a daydream for him, someplace he could mentally take himself to escape from the reality of what Skip was doing to him.
His mind wanders back to when he was eight, to those times when Skip would sit on top of him or tie him down. He would cry, plead, and beg for Skip to let him up, but the man would simply laugh, and tell him that he liked it.
There were a few months after Skip left, when Peter believed what Skip had told him. He was disgusted with himself, convinced that he had actually enjoyed what the man was doing to him because his body reacted a certain way.
He used to cry himself to sleep every night, telling himself that he deserved it. He would skip meals, feeling like it was a waste of food if he ate it. He would argue with his aunt and uncle over little things, testing their limits to see if they would get tired of him and send him away like Skip said they would.
Thinking back on it, Peter feels guilty for some of the things he would say to Ben and May. But he was eight, for fucks sake. He didn’t know how to explain what he was feeling or the thoughts he was having. He didn’t know how to reach out and ask for help. He left lost and it wasn’t fair.
It wasn’t fucking fair that he had to experience things no one should ever have to experience, let alone a child.
And Ben and May tried their best. They never gave up on him. Peter would never be able to repay them for the love they showed him, even when he would scream at them and tell them that he hated them. There were countless nights when one or both of them would silently wrap and angry Peter in their arms, hugging him and holding him until he calmed down. It was Ben and May who helped Peter all those years ago, despite not knowing what was wrong.
He wonders who will save him this time.
FRIDAY had informed Tony of the fallen building the moment it collapsed, his heart skipping a couple dozen beats when she mentioned that Peter and two civilians had been - and still were - in the building. If it weren’t for the suit, Tony is pretty sure he would have been on the ground hyperventilating, doing absolutely nothing to help the situation.
But thanks to his suit - and FRIDAY who seems to be controlling it’s movements - he is still standing while hyperventilating and doing nothing to help the situation.
Great; his kid is trapped under a building - AN ENTIRE FUCKING BUILDING - and his brain decides this is the perfect time for a vacation. He can’t think. He knows he needs to do something but the only thought running through his mind is ‘is this what a heart attack feels like?’ Helpful, right?
“Nice shot, Clint!”
“Finally!”
“That shit took way too long.”
“Language.”
The comments from his teammates drew Tony back into the conversation, and a quick glance around told him the fight was over. “The kid.” Tony managed to whisper, still trying to shake himself from the paralyzing fear he was feeling.
“I’m sure he’s fine, Tony.” Sam laughed “There’s no need to be a mother hen.”
“N-no.” He stuttered, trying to control his breathing. “The b-building..fell...Peter is...Peter is under the building!” Tony finally said, his voice becoming increasingly panicked as he spoke.
In one swift movement, Tony shot into the air, putting everything into his thrusters in an attempt to get to Peter faster. As the pile of the crumbled building came into view, his stomach dropped; there’s no way anybody could survive under that.
Calling it a ‘pile’ does nothing to justify how massive the mound of debris and rubble is. It’s still a twenty story building, with all the structural components and furniture from the dozens of apartments. It’s just compacted into a miniature fifty foot tall mountain
“Peter!” He yells, pleading for the boy to answer him, then calling again after a few seconds of silence. “Shit. FRIDAY scan for heat signatures.”
Almost instantly the A.I replies, pulling up a visual on the heads up display as she speaks. “I’ve detected three life forms. Based on previous scans, the vitals of one of the individuals belongs to Mr. Parker, however he does seem to be in distress at the moment.”
“Of course he’s in distress!” Tony deadpans. “I’m in distress and I’m not the one stuck under a building. I’d be worried if he wasn’t in distress.” Taking a deep breath, he tries to calm down. He’s already taken too long to get Peter out, being snarky and having a panic attack won’t help anyone. “Sorry, Fri. Just get me an inside view.”
The camera from Peter’s spider-bot activated, giving Tony a clear, gut-wrenching view of a man practically on top of a mask-less Peter, running his hands all over the boy’s trembling body. He can see the pole that impales through the kid’s shoulder and the arm stuck under rubble, stopping him from throwing the man off of him.
In a split second, Tony found himself carelessly throwing chunks of concrete behind him, blinded by the pure rage flowing through his veins. The motherfucker thinks he can get away with molesting his kid? Hell no, he is a dead man. If he’s lucky, his death will be quick, but Tony’s pretty sure the rest of the team will agree that the man deserves to die a slow, painful death.
“Boss, stop!” FRIDAY yells, making Tony pause for a moment. “If you move that chunk, the pile will collapse further.”
“Well what am I supposed to do?” He asks desperately, throwing his arms in the air. “FRIDAY, that bastard is practically raping Peter, I have to hurry.”
“I know, Boss.” The A.I says gently, trying to calm Tony’s nerves. “You need to go through the top so you don’t move any of the rubble protecting Mr. Parker.”
Redirecting his focus, Tony eyes the large amount of debris above Peter’s location, an idea popping in his head. “FRI, what if I were to blast the top with my repulsors?”
“There is only a ten percent chance that the pile could shift, burying them even deeper.”
Ten percent? The possibility of causing Peter more harm is not something Tony would normally risk, but the longer they take to get them out, the long Peter is being assaulted by that man. He has to risk it.
“Tony?” He looks to see the rest of the team standing beside the pile of rubble, all of them looking at it with wide eyes, probably having the same thoughts Tony first had.
“I’m gonna blast the top.” He says, leaving no room for argument. “We have to get in there, now.” Then before anyone could say anything, Tony lifted his hand, sending the first blast at the top, finding it strangely satisfying to watch the debris fly through the air.
Peter doesn’t remember being saved from the pile; from Skip. He doesn’t remember the days following while he healed in the Med Bay. Well, that’s a lie. He does remember a few things, like May crying by his bed and Tony yelling at anyone who suggested he leave for any reason. He remembers Tony telling him that Skip won't ever be able to touch him again, saying that he's been 'taken care of' and Peter honestly can't find it in him to care about what that means.
That was weeks ago, currently he’s sitting in the penthouse living room, sandwiched between May and Tony, listening to a therapist talk about further treatment plans. Apparently, Peter had been stuck in his own mind after being stuck with Skip. His subconscious recognized his head space as a safe place where he couldn’t be hurt. With the trauma of having a building collapse on him and then someone sexually assaulting him, his mind basically trapped him in the head space as a defense mechanism.
At first, Peter was beyond ashamed and embarrassed when he became aware again. May and Tony, though, reassured him that there was nothing he could have done to prevent it. He still doesn’t feel great about it, but he’s got bigger problems.
While everyone knows that Skip molested Peter under the building, nobody knows that it wasn’t the first time. That’s a detail he isn’t sure he wants to share. It’s humiliating enough that everyone knows he wasn’t strong enough to fight off Skip this time, telling them that it has happened before will only lead to more pity filled looks.
“Peter?”
Forcing himself back into the present, Peter snaps his gaze to the therapist. Tony said Dr. Sanchez is one of the best child psychologists in the United States for victims of rape and sexual assault. Something about her made Peter feel relaxed during their sessions. She doesn’t treat him like he’s five, and she makes sure that Peter has a say in any decisions being made. He trusts her, and she is the only one who knows about Peter’s past with Skip.
As much as Dr. Sanchez has suggested that he tell Tony and May, he’s too scared. He’s afraid of what they’ll think, and how they would treat him differently. He doesn't want them to look at him like he’s a fragile glass moments away from breaking. The sessions with Dr. Sanchez are helping, and he’s starting to feel okay again. He doesn’t want anything to mess it up.
But he’s tired of hiding it. He’s tired of trying to pretend that he isn’t still bothered by what Skip did to him when he was eight. A small part of him thinks that maybe Dr. Sanchez is right. Maybe telling Tony and May would help him.
“Where did you go?” Dr. Sanchez asks, a warmth shining in her eyes. “Are you okay?”
It’s now or never.
“I was thinking about Skip.” He answers honestly.
“Is there anything you want to share?”
Swallowing the lump in his throat, Peter stares at the floor, not wanting to see their reactions. “Um, Dr. Sanchez already knows,” He starts, buying himself a few seconds of time before biting the bullet. “T-this wasn’t the f-first time he’s hurt me.”
When the room stays silent, he looks up to see both May and Tony looking at him with confused expressions, so he continues. “When I was eight and he was my babysitter, he..he would rape me.”
Tears were spilling from Peter’s eyes, dripping off of his nose as he kept his head down. He heard May gasp and Tony let out an animalistic growl, but instead of moving away like Peter thought they would, they moved closer. May wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her, while Tony reached a hand up, running his fingers comfortingly through his hair.
“Oh, baby. I am so sorry.” May whispered, pressing a kiss to his temple.
“Why didn’t you tell us sooner, kid?” Tony asked in a gentle tone.
“I didn’t want to disappoint anyone.” Peter shrugged, biting his lip nervously. “I couldn’t fight him off then, and I couldn’t fight him off now. I just...felt weak.”
May hugged him tighter, and Peter could feel himself relaxing the longer she held him. “Peter, nothing about you is weak. You have been through more than most people, and despite it all, you keep going. There’s not a lot of people who would be able to do that. You are the strongest, most selfless, and loving person I know. Don’t you ever tell yourself that you are weak.”
Peter turned to give his aunt a proper hug, burying his smile in her shoulder. “The only thing I am disappointed by,” Tony starts, his voice serious, causing Peter to stiffen. “Is the fact that I wasn’t invited to join this hug.”
Snorting, Peter pulled away from May, reaching an arm out for Tony to join while rolling his eyes. “He’s such a needy baby.” May commented under her breath, only loud enough for Peter to hear, and he let out another loud laugh.
Here, with May and Tony, he feels safe, he feels loved, he feels like everything is going to be okay. Obviously, he knows there is still a long way to go for healing, but for the time being, he’ll enjoy this feeling.