Adagio

Steve Rogers knew how to get under Bucky’s skin. It probably came from the fact that he knew him so well. He always knew exactly what to say to set him off. This was especially true in high school, right before the incident. He knew talking about his school friends was triggering to him and would make him upset. That’s why he always brought it up. He loved having the power to control Bucky and his emotions. Now, Steve got under his skin by always trying to push himself onto Bucky. And that’s exactly what he did with his dressing room.

Bucky came into his dressing room at an ungodly hour just to find out that it had essentially been broken into and vandalized. Sure, it did look nice. But that wasn’t really an excuse. There were snacks on his vanity along with a plant, and a nice little set up in the corner with an armchair and a rug. The rug was especially cool, with a bunch of magenta shapes covering it. It was definitely Bucky’s style, so he loved it. At first glance, Bucky assumed Nat had done it. She had been saying that she was planning on redoing his apartment for a very long time, so this could be a first step

Wanting to explore the newly decorated room, Bucky walked over to the arm chair and sat down in it. It was, surprisingly, not musty and relatively comfortable. He was really hoping the plants were fake so he didn’t have to remember to water them. From his new chair, he took a gaze around the room to soak in the new view. Something stuck out to him that hadn’t before: the picture wall.

Bucky walked over to the wall and tried to figure out what was different. Natasha had put the picture of him and Steve back up on the wall. Considering it was laying on the floor prior, he wasn’t mad that she’d do that. Then he noticed that that wasn’t the only thing different on the wall. There were at least ten new photos featuring Steve. Nat must not have been the one to decorate the room: Steve had done it.

The Act II coda was being rehearsed, which was basically just all the girls in the show. Bucky wasn’t needed on stage for the scene. In fact, he was supposed to still be stretching in his dressing room and warming up for his rehearsal. Yet somehow he ended up on the stage.

“Why would you break into my room?” Bucky demanded, storming onto the stage. 

The dancers and orchestra both stopped immediately. All the swan girls quickly moved to the edge of the stage, wanting to stay out of whatever was about to happen. They’d never seen someone walk across the stage and pick a fight in the middle of a rehearsal. None of them would’ve guessed the first person to do it would be Bucky. He was super sweet to everyone in the company. Well, excluding Steve.

Natasha walked over to him. “Hey, I redid your dressing room last night. I’m sorry, I thought you’d like it. I thought it could be like a cool little gift for getting the part and everything.”

Bucky rolled his eyes at her. “Come on, I know he did it. Why would you hang tons of pictures of him on my wall?”

Steve walked out of the pit and onto the stage. Public confrontation was not his favorite. That’s probably why he just stood back and let Bucky lose his arm. “Hey, let’s go back to your dressing room and talk about this. Not everyone needs to hear about our personal drama.”

“Drama?” Bucky scoffed. “Steve, you made me lose my arm. And never apologized. I think this is more than just personal drama.”

Everyone was still standing on the stage, watching everything go down. There was a lot of tension in the air, but Bucky knew a lot of them were entertained by it. He could see Elektra watching from the wings, smiling in enjoyment. Honestly, Bucky wasn’t bothered. He wanted everyone to know how much of a dick Steve had been to him.

Elektra laughed from the wings. “Damn, Steve, way to go with that one.”

Bucky looked down in the pit and saw the confusion on everyone’s faces. Steve was a favorite among them. He saw how crushed Molly, who idolized Steve, looked. For a second, Bucky felt bad for letting out part of the story. But then he remembered what Steve had done and how he’d reacted to it.

It was unfair that Steve could ruin his life and just get away with it. Everyone in the company loved Steve, he was a charming guy. But Bucky knew his true colors, what he had really done. Everyone needed to know the truth about his arm. And now they did. Or, at least, they knew part of the story.

“Okay, we can continue this in private,” Steve said, grabbing Bucky’s arm and leading him back to his dressing room.

Bucky didn’t protest. He knew that causing a larger scene would not be good for his job stability. He didn’t want to risk the best role he’d ever gotten. Everyone had already heard what he’d wanted them to. 

Bucky sat down in his new armchair and Steve nervously paced around the room. It was hard for Bucky to be mad any longer, he could tell that Steve had had good intentions. It was still a huge invasion of privacy, though, considering they weren’t friends.

“Listen, Buck…” Steve started, his voice trailing off.

Bucky looked up at him. “Hmm?” 

Steve looked down at the floor. “I’m sorry, Buck. For everything. For high school, for not apologizing for high school, for breaking into your dressing room, for being angry at you.”

“And I’m sorry for standing you up.”

“Could we maybe try again? We could go get dinner tonight. Or you could come to my place. Or I could go to your’s. I just wanna talk about everything, and we are supposed to be rehearsing at the moment so now isn’t the best time. I’ve missed years of your life.”

For once, Bucky felt bad for Steve. It seemed like he was genuinely sorry and missed having Bucky in his life. He wanted to catch up, and, honestly, so did Bucky. They could hang out that night and just discuss everything. It couldn’t be that painful.

“And I’ve missed years of yours. Yeah, you can come to my place tonight.”

Steve smiled and finally looked up at him. “Awesome, I’ll be there.”

As always, Bucky didn’t have to clean up his apartment for Steve because it was almost completely empty. Seeing his new dressing room had actually inspired him to start decorating his apartment. Somehow Steve still knew exactly what he liked. Maybe he could make him decorate his apartment as well. It would also get them to spend more time together and work out all their issues.

Bucky waited nervously on his couch for Steve to arrive. Now that he’d actually apologized, they could move forward. Of course, Bucky would never really get over what had happened. Even though he accepted the apology, it would always be in the back of his mind. Considering he’d lost his arm, he thought that was valid.

After ten minutes of bouncing his knee on the couch, a knock arrived at Bucky’s door. It was Steve, of course. Bucky opened the door and smiled at him. “Come on in.”

Steve walked into the apartment and took a long look around. Bucky flushed, he could tell he was judging it. Compared to how his house had looked all throughout their childhood, this was extremely bland. He was embarrassed Steve had to see it. But it wasn’t like he wanted such a boring apartment, he just didn’t have any time outside of company classes and rehearsals. Steve had to understand that.

“This is a nice place,” Steve said. Bucky could tell he was lying through his teeth.

“Thanks, you can sit on the couch if you want,” Bucky offered. 

Steve awkwardly sat on the couch, refusing to make eye contact as usual. Bucky sat next to him, staying as close to the edge of the couch as possible. He didn’t want to overstep any bounds. Though god knows they’d been much closer than this before. It was obvious that Steve was nervous, likely that Bucky would yell at him as he’d recently done. Part of Bucky wanted to, but he couldn’t bring himself to. Not after he’d apologized. Not after seeing him in his own apartment.

“Can I be honest about something?” Bucky asked.

He could feel Steve’s body become even more tense, which he didn’t realize was physically possible. “Uh, yeah, sure,” Steve responded.

“I really like what you did to my dressing room. It looks and feels a lot more like it’s mine now. I wish I could say the same about my apartment, but I’ve just been too busy with the company to do anything to it, especially now that I’ve got a lead” Bucky said.

Now he could see Steve to relax. And he even smiled at him. “I’m glad you like it, that’s what I was trying to do,” Steve said. “I made Molly help me: I figured she’d be able to style it to your tastes better than I could.”

“Well maybe I need to make her come redo this place, it looks like ass,” Bucky commented. 

Steve laughed a little. “It’s just bare, you’ll get it looking like you in no time.”

Looking like him. Did Steve know what that would look like? Apparently he did, seeing as his dressing room makeover was executed perfectly. Bucky was a little embarrassed that he was still the same person Steve used to know. It felt like Bucky didn’t know the person Steve had become. Yet, talking to him still felt natural. 

“Do you remember that giant lava lamp we found at Savers sophomore year?” Steve questioned.

“Yeah, that’s still at my parent’s house in my bedroom there,” Bucky said through a smile. “Maybe I should just bring all my high school decor over here so it doesn’t look like a shithole anymore. I need something cute.”

Steve looked around again, presumably making a judgement on how “cute” his place currently was. “It’s not that bad, honestly. But I could help you move some stuff over here if you want. I haven’t been home in a while, but I do like going back. Plus Sam has an SUV so we would be able to bring a lot of stuff.” 

This was the nicest Steve had been to Bucky since the incident. He was actually offering to go out of his way just to do something nice for him. Well, maybe it would benefit Steve. It would certainly make Bucky like him more. Although Steve wanting Bucky to not hate him wasn’t really being manipulative. It’s what Bucky wanted, too.

“That would be great,” Bucky enthused. “We could go after rehearsal tomorrow if you want.”

Steve hesitated. “That might be cutting times a little close.”

“I mean, we can just stay the night with our parents and come back early in the morning if we really need to,” Bucky suggested.

“You know what, let’s do it. My parents would be really happy to see you again. They ask about you a lot still,” Steve said.

Bucky flushed. Their parents didn’t know about everything that happened. Bucky had never even told his parents the real story behind him losing his arm. And of course Steve wouldn’t, because he was in the wrong. But Bucky’s parents at least knew that they were no longer friends, even though they worked together. Bucky had no idea what Steve had told his parents. 

“And what do you tell them?” Bucky asked.

Now Steve was the one blushing. “Well, I tell them that you’re good and about what roles you have. Also that we talk a lot and still hang out and stuff.”

“Wait, what? Steve, that’s just straight up lying. They’re gonna think we’re best friends when we see them tomorrow. When my parents talk about you, I just change the topic. God, your parents probably told my parents everything you told them. Which is not good because I’m pretty sure my parents know more about everything than yours do.”

“I’m sorry, Buck. I just didn’t want to make them upset about everything. And now we’re friends again, so it’ll be fine. They don’t need to know all the drama that happened.”

“Are we friends again?”
“I thought so.”

“I don’t know that that’s the label I would use to describe this relationship.”

“Oh.”

“Maybe friendly would be better.”

“I can live with that. I’ll work my way up.”

It would take Steve a long time to work up to where he once was. In fact, it had taken him a long time to get there even back in high school. There was a lot of flirting going on before they ever went on a date. But that was a long time ago, there would be no dating now. Even though Steve still looked just as good as he did back then. And he was proving to be just as sweet.

“Bucky, I’m really, really, really sorry for high school,” Steve apologized. “I just… didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t step in, you know? Because then it would’ve been bad for me as well as you. It wouldn’t have helped. I honestly did try my best. I know it wasn’t good enough.”

“I just wish you weren’t ashamed of me in the first place,” Bucky reflected. 

“Buck, you know that isn’t what happened. I was never ashamed of you. It was about me, not you,” Steve stated.

“As always,” Bucky observed. 

“Okay, it’s starting to feel like you don’t want to forgive me,” Steve said, raising his voice a little. “If you don’t, that’s fine. But just don’t lead me on like this. I can leave if you don’t want to be around me. But I do want to be around you. You’ve always been my best friend: I still love you.”

Bucky blushed. “I feel the same way. I’m sorry, it’s just still a sore subject for me. You don’t even know how terrible all that was for me. I know it wasn’t easy for you either, but I did lose my arm.”

“I’m just… I’m just doing my best, Buck. I’m a different person now than I was then. That situation would never happen in the first place to the person that I am today. You know I would stand up for you.”

“I don’t know yet, but I have a feeling you’re gonna try really hard to prove it to me. So, you’re out now?”

“Uh, kinda.”

“Kinda?”

“I mean, if someone were to ask, I’d tell them. I just don’t really tell people. I haven’t been in a serious relationship since, well, you know.”

Bucky hadn’t been in a serious relationship since Steve, either. He’d had quite a few boyfriends, but they’d only lasted four months max. And none of them lived up to his prior relationship. Something about the whole “best friends to lovers” progression created a relationship impossible to replicate in any other way. He wouldn’t admit any of that to Steve, though. He had way too much pride for that.

“Well, I guess I can’t ask more of you than not purposely hiding it. We’ve seen how much that accomplishes. You live with Sam now?” Bucky asked.

Steve answered, “Yeah, it’s nice because he can actually cook. He’s still the great guy he was in high school. You should come over for dinner sometime, I know Sam would love to see you again.”

“I’d like that,” Bucky said. 

“So, back home tomorrow?”

“Yeah, as long as you’re the one driving. You know how much I hate driving down there, none of those people know how to drive.”

“Look at the driving instructor and tell me it doesn’t make sense”

Bucky laughed. It felt like the good old days again. Steve wasn’t being an asshole, and Bucky wasn’t holding a grudge. “She’s practically a hundred years old, I feel like we can’t blame her. God, if we see one person from high school down there I’m going to kill myself. If someone asks about my career and then proceeds to ridicule it one more time I will lose it.”

“Hey, I completely understand that. My grandma still asks when I’m going to go back to college and get my accounting degree.”

“Ah, you can’t help but love her, though. No one respects the art careers.”

“Yet everyone utilizes them every day.”

God, Steve’s smile was so beautiful. So was his nose. And his bright blue eyes. And his hands. And his torso. And his arms. And his strong legs. And his soft, full lips.

It took more willpower than Bucky knew he had to resist kissing him.