The Miraculous Spiderman Series

Adrien didn’t know what to expect, in all honesty, of New York. Peter had bickered with Happy the whole car ride to the apartment (generally not a good sign) and Peter’s aunt had answered the door dressed up in what he had to assume was supposed to be French attire. Despite his initial shock when she all but screamed ‘bonsoir’ upon opening the door, she seemed to be really nice.

“Welcome!” She gripped Felix in a hug, practically smothering him, then moved on to Adrien. Adrien hugged her back, always grateful for whatever physical connections he could get. She smelled like cinnamon, curiously.

She hugged Peter the longest before holding him out in front of her, inspecting him. “What have they been feeding you in France? You look so… full of life.”

“Thanks? I think? Full of bread is more like it.” Peter stepped around her into the apartment. “Were you baking something?” That’s when Adrien realized it wasn’t Ms. Parker that smelled like cinnamon. It was the whole apartment.

“You said it likes cinnamon-” Peter cut her off with a glance, tilting his head pointedly at Adrien and Felix. Adrien wasn’t sure what that was about or what ‘it’ was or what it had to do with cinnamon but he quickly forgot the interaction, instead taking in the sight of the apartment.

There was a little sitting room, a kitchen, a dining room, two bedrooms, and three bathrooms from what Adrien could see. It was the complete opposite from home.

“It’s small, but it’s home,” Peter shrugged, shuffling from one foot to the other. It was small, but Adrien had spent his whole life surrounded by so much space with no one to fill it. This apartment, however, this felt like someone’s home. Photos of Peter lined the bookshelves, including an image of him and Tony Stark, grinning and holding up a Stark Internship certificate for the camera. The chairs were slightly worn from use, and the couch looked cushy. None of the pillows matched. There was no rhyme or reason to the décor and Adrien loved it.

“It’s perfect,” he declared. Peter noticeably relaxed slightly in Adrien’s peripheral vision and he realized for the first time that Peter might be embarrassed of his living state. Sure, it was noticeably smaller than the Agreste mansion but the ambience was already a million times better. Plus, Adrien would never judge someone for how much money they had.

“May, this is Adrien and that’s Felix. Felix is Adrien’s cousin, he lives in England.”

“Thank god you two speak English,” Ms. Parker laughed, gripping Felix in another hug. “I can speak maybe five sentences of Spanish? But my French is honestly atrocious.”

“Thanks for letting us stay with you Ms. Parker,” Adrien said.

“Call me May,” she threw him a wink. “Friends of Peter are always welcome here. Peter, do you want to give them the tour before we go to Mr. Delmars?”

“There’s not much to show,” Peter muttered but lead them along all the same. “This is my room.”

He pushed open the door, revealing a room that was somehow cluttered and near empty at the same time. There was a set of bunk beds, a closet, and a desk with assorted LEGO Star Wars sets strewn across it. Posters advertising various academic events adorned the walls, along with New York Mets banners. Adrien had never considered that Peter watched sports, or maybe he didn’t. Perhaps it was just a sign of patriotism.

“Dibs on top bunk,” Felix said, furthering his claim by throwing his carry-on bag atop it, eyes darting between Adrien and Peter as if daring either of them to refute him.

“Fine by me. I’m going to sleep on the floor,” Peter said. “So Adrien, you get the bottom bunk, if that’s alright.”

“Sleep…on the floor?” The hardwood floor did not look like it promised comfort. Peter didn’t seem to mind, however, cheerfully shrugging his backpack off.

“My aunt’s promised to get us sandwiches for dinner.”

“Sandwiches?” Felix frowned at him.

“You guys sure seem confused. They’ve got sandwiches in France and England, I know that for a fact.” He shook his head, leading them back out into the kitchen.

“Wait,” Felix called, prompting them to return. He was pointing at a small shoebox stuffed with tiny pillows and wash cloths.

“Uh!” Peter stared at it for a long moment and Adrien could practically see the gears in his head turning. “Bed for my pet pigeon!”

“You have a pet pigeon?” Adrien tilted his head. He didn’t really know enough about New Yorkers to argue, however. The only other one he’d ever met was Chloé’s mom and she wasn’t really a good representation of the general population. Already May Parker was one-upping Mme Bourgeois in every single way. For starters, she knew her relative’s name.

“Everyone has one. It’s a New Yorker thing, you know?” Peter gave him a look he couldn’t quite decipher. Was Peter…making fun of him? Adrien got that vibe but he didn’t understand how, as Peter hadn’t said anything remotely pertaining to him. Even so, the tone of voice and the statement itself sounded remotely familiar, but Adrien just couldn’t put his finger on it…

Either way, they left the apartment for the sandwich shop only a few minutes later, May telling Felix and Adrien stories about Peter and his friends and everything they got up to in New York. Adrien picked up pretty quickly that May knew about Peter’s…extracurricular activities, as she kept referring to the Avengers by their first names in her stories, skirting around any actual mention of superpowers.

“Once, Peter went to Germany and made lots of friends, like Rhodes and T’Challa,” she was in the middle of telling Felix when he fixed her with an odd stare.

“As in T’Challa, king of Wakanda?”

May froze on the spot, clearly not expecting Felix to have a wide understanding of the global monarchy. Peter quickly came to her defence, rather poorly, however.

“You meet all sorts through the Stark Internship. Also, T’Challa is a very common name, actually.”

Adrien intentionally hung back while May and Felix ordered their sandwiches after Peter exchanged a few quick sentences in Spanish with the owner.

“You know a king?” Adrien whispered to him under his breath as Peter grabbed a few packets of some sort of candy.

“Don’t think about it too much,” Peter hissed back. “Think of him more as a coworker, but not really. He’s like my boss, but not my boss, if you get my meaning? Kinda like HR? You know how they’re a part of the company technically but you don’t really talk to them unless you’ve got a problem because they’ve got their own thing going? Wakanda is Human Resources within the Avengers.”

Adrien blinked, trying to process how the entire country of Wakanda could be compared to Human Resources but Peter had already moved on, enthusiastically chatting away with the employees.

“Peter, we haven’t seen you around lately!” One of them said, handing Felix his sandwich. Felix, who was used to his sandwiches coming wrapped in gold foil and made by a professional chef, took it gingerly, like it was bomb about to go off.

“Hey! Marco! I’ve been in Paris!”

“Paris? That’s where all those rich kids go. Are you a rich kid now, Pete?” Peter just laughed and shook his head.

“Nah, I don’t forget where I come from.”

“That’s right! Queens, New York, baby!” Marco danced around the owner, Mr. Delmar, to slap Peter’s sandwich down in front of him. Felix just continued to stare, like he was on the cusp of a having a stroke from the sheer amount of conversation and enthusiasm. If Adrien was considered sheltered from human interaction, then Felix was a hermit. Although Adrien suspected that was mostly by his own design.

“Time to go, boys,” May reminded them, passing Adrien his sandwich before hustling them out of the shop.

“Do you know where I can buy Camembert?” Adrien asked Peter as they stepped back out into the crisp evening air. He hadn’t known they would be skipping customs by riding in Tony Stark’s jet, so he hadn’t packed any cheese and sooner or later Plagg would chew him out for it.

“Man, this is America! All our cheese is fake.” Peter ripped into his bag of gummy candy with gusto.

“Can’t you wait until we’re at the apartment, Peter?” May sighed without any real exasperation as they ran through traffic.

“You know,” Felix said, narrowly avoiding a car that didn’t even slow for him. “Crosswalks are actually one of my favourite inventions. John Peake Knight, first one was actually made in London, and they’re very helpful for not almost- eep!”

A highly uncharacteristic squeak escaped Felix’s throat as he leapt over the gutter, away from whatever had scared him.

“Did you see a rat?” Peter asked, his tone suggesting that rats were not a phenomenon.

“Is that common here?” Adrien tilted his head, beginning to wonder about New York’s overall cleanliness, but was cut off by Felix shuddering.

“It looked like a glass eyeball!”

Peter and May exchanged a look that seemed to say, nothing new, before Peter just shrugged.

“I’ve seen much weirder. Let’s go.”

“No, I’m not ready to move past this!” Felix jogged slightly to catch up with their group as they continued down the street. “You’ve seen weirder?”

“If it’s any consolation, it was probably a real eyeball, not a glass one,” May chimed in, as if that would help matters. Felix paled slightly, obviously so far out of his usual element. London wasn’t the cleanest of places either, but Felix lived in the Chelsea neighbourhood so chances were the weirdest of sights he’d ever seen was the occasional drunk millionaire. New York would be a good opportunity for him to be exposed to the lesser things in life.

They reached the apartment without spotting any weirder objects (not that Adrien was particularly looking, in fact he’d begun to think that ignorance was indeed bliss) and settled in the sitting room to eat their sandwiches. Peter put on a Star Wars movie after a bit of debate with Felix over which one they should start with, for Adrien’s sake. He wasn’t sure which one they actually decided on, as Felix kept talking over the dialogue to point things out to Adrien and then Peter would chime in, leaving him thoroughly confused but better educated on the history of some planet called Tatooine which the main character(s?) may or may not have been on currently. Adrien honestly had no idea.

“Not a Star Wars fan?” May asked when Adrien inevitably wandered into the kitchen after being yelled at by both Peter and Felix when he didn’t get properly upset at some random old dude’s death. Adrien hadn’t even known his name, let alone why he was essential to the plot.

“Never seen it before,” Adrien admitted, helping her tidy. “Don’t think it’s the best idea to watch it for the first time with two super-fans.”

“Good call,” May laughed. “Is this your first time in America?”

“I’ve been to California before and maybe a few other places, I can’t remember it too well.”

“Disneyland?”

“I wish. I only ever went to Disney World as a tiny little kid. Before I became a model or whatever.” Adrien leaned against the counter, doing his best to keep his tone light and expression neutral, but May had picked up on his slight change of attitude. Maybe Peter’s sense of perception wasn’t just from being Spiderman, but inherited.

“I take it you’re not a fan of modelling?” She pushed her glasses up slightly, pausing her cleaning.

“Modelling is…complicated. I only started doing it to make my father happy, I thought it would bring us closer together. Instead it only drove us further apart.”

“What would you do, if you had the choice?” May looked at him earnestly but Adrien was at a loss for words. No one had really ever asked him that, or considered what he wanted in life. In fact, he didn’t even know.

“I couldn’t even tell you. Most of the time I just do whatever it takes to keep people happy. I didn’t even go to school for the first fourteen years of my life. Homeschooling only.”

“Jeez,” May sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I can’t even imagine what that must be like for you, stuck in a big ol’ mansion doing whatever you can to make others happy. But Adrien, honey, you can’t always please everyone. Sometimes the only way you can be content is if you make yourself happy.”

“Trust me, I’ve tried.” Adrien glanced over his shoulder at where Felix and Peter were continuing to pour over their movie, sharing theories and gummy candy. “I think that’s why Peter and I are so close. He never expects anything from me, if that makes sense? Everyone else likes me for my money, my status, my appearance. But Peter just likes me for who I am. Somehow he picked out who I was before even I knew.”

“Good to know I raised him right,” May laughed.

“You raised the greatest hero I know,” Adrien said, his voice dropping. “You did better than raise him right.”

“He’s told you too, I suppose?”

“I sort of found out. He saved my life. On multiple occasions.”

“That sounds like Peter.” She looked past Adrien, looking at her nephew where he was mimicking lightsaber noises in time with the sabres onscreen.

“It must’ve been hard, taking him in and everything.” Adrien glanced at her, not wanting to intrude too much. “Peter’s told me somethings, but it must’ve been really hard on you.”

“I loved Peter,” she said, her eyes still trained just past Adrien’s shoulder. “I’m not even related to him by blood, I married his uncle, but he’s like a son to me now. As soon as we learned what happened to his parents…I mean there was no choice to be made. We took him in on the spot. And when Ben died, I had Peter to turn to.” As soon as the last words left her mouth, her smile returned and she looked back at him. “He was a hero in my eyes long before I learned he was Spiderman.”

“My mom died,” Adrien said, rocking back against the counter and squinting his eyes shut at the brazenness of his words. “That came out wrong, I was trying to relate. Sorry, I’ll just…not.”

May’s eyes softened. “And I take it you and your father’s relationship has struggled since then?”

“It’s always been bad.” Adrien wasn’t sure why he was opening up to May in her kitchen after knowing her for a few hours, but the Parkers seemed to have that effect on him. First Peter had presented himself as a brotherly figure, and now May was already becoming a motherly figure in his eyes. After his mother’s death, he’d tried so hard to seek the same solace in Nathalie, but it became apparent rather quickly that it wasn’t the same. Nathalie loved him, but her job came first in every sense. May, however, reminded him of his mother. They both had the same loving light in their eyes, like they touched the souls of everyone they met.

“Before he was a workaholic. I barely saw him, but that’s just the life of a famous fashion designer, right? And so I’d spend what time I could with my mother, but she was a famous actress who was constantly travelling for different roles. She spent what time she could with me, and I think she always felt bad for being so busy but what could she do? So a lot of my childhood was spent alone, just sitting in my room. I’m pretty sure I have the world’s highest Pac-Man score.” He laughed without humour.

“I’ve never been good at making friends either. The only ones I were allowed to have as a child were Felix, and Chloé Bourgeois, the mayor’s daughter. And when I went to school for the first time, people only wanted to know me because of my fame. For a few days I liked it. But then I realized it was a lonely existence to be adored without merit. I made a few real friends, though, but none quite like Peter.” And Ladybug, he thought internally. “And I think that’s because he wasn’t impressed and why would he be? Peter hangs out with Tony Stark, he’s used to money and cool suits. He’s literally freaking Spiderman, so he’s used to power and being generally the coolest person in the room. And he’s Peter Parker, so he’s a genius who automatically just seems to understand stuff that leaves everyone else’s heads reeling. It’s so refreshing to not have to live up to the expectations he’s set for me because he straight up just doesn’t have any!”

“He learned pretty early on that you can put people on pedestals but then they’re just that much easier to knock over, with that much further to fall.” She didn’t elaborate and a bleary-eyed Peter and Felix wandered into the kitchen at that very moment.

“Jet lagged?” May guessed, patting Peter on the cheek. “Off to bed with you three, now.”

Adrien made to move but she held up a hand to tell him to hang back, just for a moment.

“Adrien,” she said as soon as Peter and Felix had disappeared off into the room. “If anything happens when you go back to Paris and you need to get out, I know I’m halfway across the world but my door is always open for you. I’ll give you my phone number before you leave and if you ever need anything at all, don’t hesitate to call.”

“Thanks mo-I mean, May.” Adrien blinked hard at his mixup. May was many things, but she wasn’t his mother. “Can I have a hug?” He’d barely registered the request before it escaped his mouth. May let out an ‘aww’ before scooping him into one of the best hugs he’d ever had, rubbing his back before sending him off to bed.

“Your aunt’s the best, Peter,” Adrien said as he shuffled into the bedroom.

“Don’t tell me you think she’s hot too,” Peter groaned as he set up his sleeping bag on the floor.

“What? No!” Adrien hadn’t even considered May’s general attractiveness. He was doing what he always did with any grown woman that wandered into his life – searching for a motherly figure.

“Move your fat fucking head, I’m going to wash up,” Felix lightly kicked Peter’s head as he walked by.

“I just implied that maybe Emperor Palpatine wasn’t the best villain of all time! You don’t need to bully me!” Peter called after Felix, muttering something else under his breath that Adrien didn’t catch.

“Are we suiting up tonight?” Adrien asked the second he knew Felix was out of earshot.

“You insane? Of course not. I’m tired, you’re tired, you told Ladybug you were in England and I’m supposed to be getting suit renovations, whatever that means. We’re not suiting up, period.”

“You said lying was fine to protect our identities.” Adrien sat down on the bottom bunk, the mattress significantly more worn than he was used to and a lot creakier. “Plus, it’s dark out, no one would see us.”

“Okay, one, I literally never said that. Two, this is New York. People don’t sleep here and the lights stay on all night. No matter how dark your suit is, people are going to see you, take pictures, post them on Twitter calling you a cat boy and then bam! Ladybug will be mad at you.”  

“Peter pleaseeeeee.” Adrien was not above begging and giving Peter his best kitten eyes.

“Okay, I’m a master of the puppy dog eyes, so that’s not going to work on me. We can go out tomorrow night, though, no suits, just us having fun in the town. Maybe meet up with Ned or something.”

Adrien didn’t get the chance to protest as Felix chose that very moment to march back into the room, a new argument prepared to lob at Peter, who eagerly countered him with his own verbal cannonball. Still clueless as to what they were talking about, Adrien grabbed his toiletry back and marched into the bathroom.

“No Camembert? What kind of lousy country is this?” Plagg complained the second Adrien had shut the door.

“I’ll look for a cheese market or something for you tomorrow,” Adrien promised half-heartedly, uncertain as to whether or not he’d actually be upholding his end of the bargain.

“You better!” Plagg’s words were overshadowed by the buzzing of his phone against the sink counter. His superhero phone.

A text from Ladybug blinked up at him and Adrien had never unlocked his phone so fast in his life.

[ Missed seeing you for patrol tonight ] He grinned at her words. Ladybug, openly being all sweet and cute with him? Adrien couldn’t believe his luck.

[ if I were there, I’d give you a kiss goodnight~ ]

[ but for now I guess emojis will have to do ] He attached a kissy face emoji to the message, sending it off with a grin.

[ Dork ]

[ Having fun in England? ]

[ oh yeah it’s great ] Adrien replied honestly, his mind wandering as he tried to picture Ladybug typing out the texts to him. What would she be doing? Was she at home, watching a movie or doing her homework? Or was she out with friends, thinking of him? Now that he thought about it, it was probably about two in the morning, so he really hoped she was at home and in bed, just there to wish him a goodnight.

[ my cousin made me watch star wars lol ]

[ I would’ve thought that you were already a Star Wars fan ]

[ Seems like it would be your sort of thing ]

[ I guess we’ll never know because he talked through all of it ]

[ kind of difficult to follow the plot if no one can get a word in edgewise ]

[ not that I’m complaining but you should go to sleep ]

[ it may not be a school day for me but it sure is one for you ]

[ Wow ]

[ This is the first time I’ve ever heard you ask me to leave ]

[ what can I say ]

[ I value your wellbeing ]

[ goodnight my lady <3 ]

[ Goodnight Chat ]

[ Have fun tomorrow ]

Adrien shut his phone off, exiting the bathroom with what was probably the most lovesick grin ever, at least until he accidentally planted his foot right between Peter’s legs, failing to realize that his friend was lying on the ground.

“Ow!” Peter howled, curling up into a ball. “Jesus, Adrien!

“Peter! Why were you there?”

“Can you twits shut up?” Felix poked his head above the edge of the top bunk. “Some of us are actually trying to sleep.”

“Some of us might’ve just lost our ability to produce children in the future,” Peter groaned as Adrien apologized profusely.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think you could actually be hurt!” Adrien whispered as Felix rolled back over with a disinterested grunt.

“That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!” Peter groaned. “Of course I can get hurt! I’m not made of fucking metal!”

May, who had been passing by the door, cast a frown in Peter’s direction. “She gets it from you.”

“Yeah, we all know she gets it from me! I’m just surprised you bought it for this long!”

Adrien had absolutely no idea who ‘she’ was, but apparently someone had inherited Peter’s rather choice vocabulary and May was obviously less than pleased about it, if her disappointed stare was any indication. Maybe a cousin? Or family friend? Someone young and impressionable, for sure.

“Time for bed, boys.” May switched the light off and closed the door, her footsteps retreating off down the hall.

“I’m sorry, Peter,” Adrien whispered, tiptoeing his way over to the bottom bunk and settling down with slight difficulty.

“Just shut up and go to sleep, Agreste.” Peter shuffled noisily around in his sleeping bag, muttering something under his breath.

Adrien settled down on his bed, bouncing slightly on the springy mattress, recalling all Peter’s stories about New York and really hoping that no rats chewed through his shirt while he was asleep.

He awoke the next morning to a pillow covering his face. Felix’s, he assumed, having fallen at some point during the night.

“Good morning,” Peter said mildly, dropping down from the ceiling. Adrien raised an eyebrow in question. Peter just grinned. “Gotta get a head start on the day.”

“Breakfast is ready!” May called from the kitchen.

“You wake Felix up,” Adrien said, quickly pulling a sweater on and dancing out of the room. “I’m not looking to die at eight am.”

He skipped into the kitchen as Peter hesitantly approached Felix’s sleeping form, eager to leave the room before Felix went nuclear.

“Adrien!” May turned around from where she’d been placing a plate on the table. “Your assistant sent over a whole list of foods you’re not allowed to eat, so I figured why not make all of them? A proper English breakfast; bacon, eggs, French toast, sausages, the works!”

“It looks amazing,” Adrien said, sitting down at the table.

“Where’s Peter?”

“Dead, I presume.” It was at that moment that Felix, looking like he was prepared to kill but already dressed in his usual collared shirt and tie, entered the kitchen, Peter following loosely behind.

“There you boys are!” May ruffled Peter’s hair as he sat, grabbing his knife and fork.

“We invited a homicidal maniac into our home,” Peter said stiffly, looking at Felix with wide eyes.

“I haven’t had my morning cup of tea,” Felix sneered, pouring ample amounts of maple syrup over his pancakes and sausages, squeezing the bottle like it was personally responsible for all his various plights.

And Adrien? Well, he was in heaven. New York was already a million times better than his (home) life in Paris. As they dug in, May chatted with them, even managing to bring Felix out of his shell slightly. It shouldn’t have been weird to him that May ate meals with them but it had been awhile since Adrien had a parental figure actually sit in the same room as him.

Between her and Peter’s playful banter, Adrien could piece together just how healthy their relationship was. He didn’t particularly like to think that his relationship with his father was toxic, per say, although multiple people had told him that it was, but he’d refused to see how bad it had gotten until that moment. Watching Peter casually toss a grin in May’s direction with complete comfort following a rather cheeky comment and watching her laugh in response, Adrien realized what he was missing. He wanted it so bad, he didn’t even know what to do with himself in that epiphanic moment.

Maybe his father would never be just like May, but what if Adrien tried to make a bit more of an effort to talk to him? Even if it was just small conversations, his father had to open up more over time, right?

“Adrien?” Adrien glanced up from where he’d been poking his scrambled eggs, shovelling them around his plate, lost in thought. The whole table was staring at him, clearly waiting for some sort of response.

“Huh?” He awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “What was that, sorry?”

“Felix wants the butter,” Peter said, pointing at the butter dish that was set next to Adrien.

“Oh, yeah.” Adrien lifted it, passing it to Felix who mumbled words of thanks.

“Are you okay, honey?” May was looking at him with concerned eyes, causing Adrien to bob his head quickly in attempt to expel her worries.

“I was just thinking about…things.” He looked at Peter, who shot him a questioning glance. Adrien shook his head slightly to tell him ‘no’ and that it really was nothing.

“May, I was thinking of taking Adrien and Felix to Times Square by subway today,” Peter said lightly, drumming his fingers on the table.

“Go for it,” May replied, idly cutting up her pancake. “It’s probably best you boys are out of the house while I’m cooking. What time is Tony coming?”

“Tony Stark is coming to thanksgiving dinner?” Felix choked slightly, drinking a gulp of tea before setting his cup down with more force than Adrien thought necessary.

“Yeah, he asked for an invite,” Peter grinned, polishing off his plate. “So hurry up. It’s an hour long ride there.”

The subway was the furthest thing from clean Adrien had ever seen. Reminiscent of the bottom of a trash can, random items were strewn about the seats and floor, along with a pigeon that seemed to have just strolled into the train car. Peter had only let them linger on the platform for a moment to ‘build up their rat tolerance’ by having them look at the tracks which seemed to be home to a large colony of rodents. Needless to say, Adrien hadn’t had enough time to acclimatize to the rats’ apparent prevalence in New York before he’d been unceremoniously shoved onto the train.

“You’re that French model, right?” A girl dressed in what appeared to be Wednesday Addams cosplay approached him as the train left the station. She appeared to be about their age, black lipstick and a black dress, black hair divided into two braids that ran down her front. Her platform boots were so massive that, despite her being obviously on the shorter side, she stood almost eye level to him.

“Adrien Agreste? That’s me.” Adrien let out an airy laugh, already uncomfortable.

“Can I get a picture?”

Adrien agreed, just wanting to get the interaction over with before someone else recognized him, flashing his best model smile for her camera. Just as he thought it would be done, the train lurched unexpectedly, sending him flying towards the disgusting floor he despised so much. Luckily, Peter caught him before he could descend into a germaphobe’s hell, easily righting Adrien back on his feet.

“I’m Gina.” Oh, so apparently the interaction was not over. Adrien could hear Felix and Peter whispering about something behind him, presumably both in French and about him.

“Really nice to meet you, Gina,” Adrien said, donning his best ‘thank you now please leave me alone’ tone.

“I’m actually a photographer. Lookin’ to get into the fashion scene. Got any tips?” She smacked her gum loudly and Adrien wanted to die. The last thing he wanted to think about on that trip was fashion. It was bad enough he’d have to go do a quick shoot tomorrow to uphold his end of his promise to his father, let alone talk about it with a stranger on the subway.

“Um, I don’t really have any. I just go where they tell me to and stand where they tell me to.”

“Well, what do the good photographers do?” She pressed.

“They go into nature photography,” Adrien said before he could stop himself, feeling Peter’s peals of laughter behind him before he heard them.

“This is our stop, Adri,” Peter managed, gripping Adrien’s shoulder to steer him away from Gina, who was now fixing him with a look that appeared both angry and mocking at the same time, and off the subway.

“Scary girl on scary subway,” Adrien muttered, swatting Peter’s hand away as they stepped onto the platform.

“I would hardly call her scary,” Felix said, heading towards the exit as fast as his feet could carry him. Adrien was beginning to think he had a fear of rats. “You looked like she’d shoved a knife under your throat rather than asked for a photo.”

“I was kind of hoping no one would notice me this time,” Adrien shoved his hands into his pockets as they climbed the stairs, stepping back out into the light.

“Fat chance,” Peter snorted, but Adrien barely paid any mind to him, because Times Square was beautiful. There were so many buildings with so many lights and flashing signs and billboards and everyone was milling around and it was gorgeous and-

-his face was staring back at him. Apparently he’d been incorrect about the release date of the spreads him and Peter had been in. Or maybe Times Square was just an exception. Either way, Adrien’s likeness was shining down on him, his face made look serene as he stared off into middle distance, dressed in the finest Agreste winter suits. The suit in question was a crushed red velvet, one his father had insisted Adrien add to his own closet. And before Adrien’s very eyes, the billboard changed, his image dissolving and being replaced with a familiar set of abs.

“No fucking way,” Peter cursed. Only the bottom half of his face was shown, his hand caressing his own jaw, a wet, white shirt that hid absolutely nothing plastered to his body, Agreste brand briefs maintaining the rest of his modesty. And Felix was practically cackling beside them as the screen changed again, showing another shot of Adrien.

“This seems like some sort of sick glitch in the simulation,” Adrien grumbled, already preparing for the amount of staring he was going to get if his freaking picture was plastered above him.

“I’ve got an idea,” Peter said. “Just put on sunglasses and a tourist shirt. The locals avoid tourists like the plague.”

He lead them to a souvenir shop and emerged a few moments later with a yellow t-shirt that read ‘City Boy’ with a picture of an apple below it and another that simply said ‘I <3 NYC’. He handed the latter to Adrien and the former to Felix, who didn’t look thrilled in the slightest, pulling the yellow fabric atop his collared shirt and tie.

Adrien slipped his green jacket off to pull on the t-shirt, topping the look off with a pair of mirrored sunglasses Peter handed him.

“Adrien, you look badass,” Peter said. “Felix, I always knew you were a city boy at heart.”

“If I didn’t share the same face as Adrien, I’d literally kill you,” Felix griped.

“Whatever you say, city boy. Plastic surgery is an option, although I’d hardly complain if I had the same face as a world famous model.”

“Where should we go?” Adrien asked, beginning to feel slightly overwhelmed from the noise of thousands of people milling about combined with the flashing lights.

“There’s the wax museum,” Peter suggested. Adrien agreed, following Peter along, knowing with a gnawing certainty that one of his various wax statues was inside. His experience with wax museums had an…interesting history, but perhaps his lack of female companions this time around would keep him from screwing up like he had last time.

But once he stepped into the foyer, he knew why Peter had suggested it.

Because staring down at him, looking far more menacing that he ever did in real life, was Spiderman.

Peter was elated as he stared up at this wax model, the newest addition to the superhero line. Of course, he couldn’t exactly marvel too much since Felix was right there and also blissfully unaware of Peter’s alter ego and it would be creepy if Peter showed too much interest in his ‘coworker’.

“I’m just going to take a photo, since I think Spiderman would really like to…see this.” He didn’t wait to see Felix’s reaction, instead whipping out his phone and snapping pictures from all angles. Ned was going to lose his mind.

They didn’t spend too long in there, as Adrien seemed rather on edge and Peter had gotten what he’d came for, so they headed back out into the square, where Peter saw something he’d been on the lookout for ever since they arrived. And there it was, his lord, his saviour, his perfect revenge plan for Felix’s little stunt before breakfast where he’d tried his very best to outright strangle Peter.

A disheveled looking Elmo with matted fur was trudging around, yelling various things at passing tourists. Perfect.

“Hey Felix, why don’t you go take a photo with Elmo?” Peter suggested innocently. Felix gave him a look that suggested he would rather let the rats on the subway eat him alive than go anywhere near that man, but Adrien was on Peter’s side.

“Yeah Felix! It’ll be great to show your mum!” Adrien was just trying to be supportive to help Felix have a good time, Peter could tell, but his own motivations were far less pure. Every New Yorker knew to steer clear of the costumed people. If they so much as suspected they were in the background of one of your photos, they’d hunt you down and make you pay.

And there was no way Felix was going to agree to pay twenty bucks for a photo with some random Elmo guy, pay no mind to the fact he was literally loaded. An unstoppable force was about to meet an immovable object, and Peter loved physics.

“Fine,” Felix begrudgingly agreed with a roll of his eyes, approaching the Elmo with an air of confidence Peter could never muster. That poor Elmo had no idea what was about to hit him.

Felix held up his phone, capturing a blank faced selfie with the Elmo before attempting to simply slide his phone into his pocket and return to Peter and Adrien. The Elmo had other plans, however, grabbing Felix’s phone before he could leave.

“You gotta pay for that, pal,” the Elmo said in a far gruffer voice than Peter could ever recall Elmo as having, doing his best to pry Felix’s phone out of his suddenly iron grip.

“Pay for what?” Felix enunciated every word clearly, tone laced with challenge.

“The photo, man. You can’t just up and walk away. This is my craft.”

“I’m not going to pay for some photo.”

“Then your friends are going to be taking photos of your brains when I smash your head open on the concrete!” The Elmo leapt at Felix, screaming some form of war cry, obviously not one to beat around the bush.

And, as it always did for Peter when things got intense, time seemed to slow down as he watched Felix. Something in his brain seemed to switch from challenging to calculating, and Peter could see him lower his centre of gravity, putting his weight into his feet. And that’s when Peter realized that Felix was actually trained in the martial arts. Quite honestly, he’d just been expecting Felix to make thinly veiled threats against the Elmo man before hightailing when things got physical, but apparently Felix was prepared to go down with his guns blazing.

“Welp, we had a good trip,” Peter said to Adrien as Elmo threw the first punch.

“What?” Adrien glanced at him, an confused look on his face, clearly not grasping the true gravity of the situation that was his cousin fighting a man that was most likely on meth in the middle of Times Square.

“Yeah, we’re about to watch someone die.”

Felix clocked the Elmo in the head before stepping back, raising his hands to eye level. The head was obviously the most padded part of the costume, and Peter would definitely not have elected that to be his first target, but he decided not to intervene, simply to enjoy the show.

Elmo man decided to attempt a roundhouse kick, something that would’ve been more successful if his boots weren’t padded. Felix easily blocked the kick and aimed a kick of his own, straight into the most sensitive spot he could find.

“Are you wearing a cup?” Felix glowered as his kick between the man’s legs proved unsuccessful in terms of effect.

“Hell yeah baby, you never know when I’m going to have to take one of you fucking tourists to pound town.”

“Pound town is slang for having sex,” Peter informed Adrien, thinking it rather essential he didn’t miss out on that little gem. “I take it Elmo doesn’t know that.”

“When you what?” Felix said, disbelief written on his features. “You know what, I’m going to kick your ass, clown man.”

And Felix proceeded to do just that, grabbing hold of the Elmo’s arm and flipping him over his head, slamming the costumed man into the ground with a resounding crack.

Felix came running towards them and for a moment, Peter thought he was coming after him next, until Felix ran straight past him, calling over his shoulder.

“Run!”

“Did you kill him?” Adrien asked, nearly tripping over his own feet as the trio booked it away.

“Might’ve paralyzed him,” Felix replied. “Don’t think he’ll die though. But he’s definitely not going to be happy when he gets up.”

The next few hours were spent looking over their shoulders, making sure they weren’t being followed by a herd of angry Elmos before Peter got a call from Aunt May, asking him to pick up some zucchini on his way back, promising she’d text him if she remembered anything else.

“Why don’t you guys wander around for a bit?” Peter suggested, glancing at the list of other things May had forgotten that she’d just sent him, along with the request for a tablecloth and some linen napkins. “I’ve got some errands to run and I don’t want you guys to miss out on seeing the city.”

Felix and Adrien readily agreed, and Peter told them to meet him in front of the red steps in an hour and a half. Should be plenty of time for him to pick out colour coordinating tableware and an odd assortment of produce.

No sooner had he stepped into Macy’s than he received a phone call, one from Chloé Bourgeois at that. It took one hundred percent of Peter’s willpower not to fling the phone into the nearest wine glass display as he pressed answer.

“Hé,” he said simply, turning cloth napkins over in his hands while he waited her to get down to business.

“Why isn’t Adrien answering his phone?” She demanded. Peter hung up.

He’d wanted to do that since her ‘talk’ with him at school, the day after the heist, where she’d made it very clear she wanted nothing to do with him.

What was it she said? Peter thought idly. Oh yes, ‘people like me aren’t friends with people like you’. How lovely.

Nonetheless, when she called again, he picked up. He didn’t really know why. He had nothing to prove to her, yet something compelled him to press that little green button.

“We’re not friends. If you’ve got something to say to Adrien, say it to him yourself,” Peter said sharply, setting aside a box of crisp red napkins for later consideration.

“Well I can’t say anything to him if he’s not answering his phone!” She whined from the other end. Peter rolled his eyes.

“Okay, not my problem. He’s not here right now.”

“Where is he then?”

“No idea. If it’s important, call Felix, he’s with him.”

She sputtered before forcing out a response. “I will not call Felix! But it is important!”

“Tough luck sunshine,” Peter said, beginning to wonder if it was too soon to hang up again.

“You’re not seriously still mad at me, are you?” Chloé accused.

“Mad at you? Gosh, it’s almost like you told me not to talk to you. We’re not on the same level, got the message loud and clear.”

“You know I didn’t mean it like that,” Chloé’s tone sounded odd through the phone. Peter couldn’t tell what she meant by that statement.

“I don’t really know what to think of you, Chloé, in all honesty. I tried to be nice to you and you turned around and literally insulted me to my face.”

“Okay, do you want me to be honest?”

Peter just wanted the conversation to be over. He was done caring, he’d moved on. Chloé didn’t seem to care enough to wait for a response, however, ploughing on.

“I don’t have many friends-” Peter snorted, hard, but Chloé appeared not to hear him as she continued “- and especially not nice ones like Adrien. But definitely not ones like you.”

“Yeah, because we’re not friends.”

“I’d like us to be.”

Peter wanted to bash his head against the nearest display table. Indecisive much? “What do you mean you want us to be? I tried that, you made it very clear being friends wasn’t in your agenda.”

“I changed my mind.”

“And what brought around this resounding realization?” Peter grabbed a harvest themed tablecloth and the matching napkins, beginning his search for an elusive ‘Lazy Susan’ as per May’s request.

“When I realized you’re the sort of person everyone wants to be friends with.”

“Great, so I’m trendy and now you want to be pals. I don’t think so.” Peter was beginning to feel slightly offended by the conversation and honestly just wanted it to be over as soon as possible.

“I don’t know how to explain this to you! Argh. When do you get back?”

“Day after tomorrow,” Peter said curtly.

“I’ll see you on Monday.” And with that she hung up, leaving Peter standing in the housewares section and feeling very, very confused and mostly annoyed.

Due to his tumult of thoughts, Peter did not manage to locate the Lazy Susan, nor did he try very hard. In fact, the second the phone call ended Peter marched his ass right on over to the checkout, paid, and left.

He reached the meeting place in time after popping by a grocery store along the way, arms now laden with various items in bags that would most likely break before he got back on the subway. Peter loved life.

For twenty minutes, Peter waited, until finally Adrien and Felix appeared in the crowd and made their way over to him.

“Sorry, we got lost,” Adrien said, one hand gripping a Starbucks coffee; the other, a massive Saks bag that most likely held clothes that cost more than Peter’s entire apartment. “And my phone died.”

“How do you get lost?” Peter asked. “It’s a grid system, the streets are numbered!”

“I can’t read,” Adrien deadpanned. “And Felix isn’t much help.” Felix did not dispute this comment.

“Let’s get back to the subway,” Peter said, his frown still lingering after Chloé’s call.

“What happened?” Adrien asked as they made their way through the bustling tourist hub.

“Chloé called me,” Peter muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets. “She had something she wanted to tell you.”

“I thought you two weren’t speaking.”

“We’re not.”

“What the fuck is that?” Felix leapt away from the subway entrance, pointing an accusing finger at the ground.

“Dead rat,” Peter said, barely needing to glance at the fuzzy lump on the pavement to know what it was. “Keep moving, don’t touch it.”

“I wasn’t going to!”  

The second they returned to the apartment, May snatched the bags out of Peter’s arms before running back into the kitchen, what sounded like a symphony of timers going off in her wake.

“I’m going to go see if she needs any help,” Peter said to his friends, quickly ducking into the kitchen.

“Nope! Out!” May said the second she saw him standing there. “You’re like a curse on my meals!”

“I’m not a curse-” Peter started before a pot on the stove bubbled over, steam hissing sharply.

“Go to my room to check on Su.” May waved a hand at him, shooing him away.

Peter meandered on into her room, able to tell when he wasn’t wanted, surprised to see Suluu set up with May’s phone, watching some tv show.

“Peter!” She squeaked the second she saw him, pausing the video and zooming off the bed where she’d been resting.

“Hey Su, having fun?” He glanced down to see what she was watching. “Is that Lucifer? You do not need to be watching that you little demon.” He snatched the phone away from her, turning child lock on.

“I’ll have you know I like that show. I’m learning lots.” Suluu folded her arms across her chest, smirking up at him.

“I know you are which is why I’m taking it away. How’s rooming with May?” Since Suluu couldn’t very well sleep in his room at night, Peter had transferred her tiny (not a pigeon) bed into May’s room, generally leaving her to her own devices and trusting she wouldn’t get bored and let her inner arsonist shine through.

“It’s been great,” Suluu said. “She makes me nice little bubble baths for me in the bathroom sink, she even lights candles, it’s so nice.”

“Good to hear it,” Peter said. “Listen, we’ll go out tonight while everyone’s asleep, visit Ned for a bit, okay? Get you some fresh air.”

“Please, this is nothing,” Suluu waved an arm. “I was trapped in the Space Between for soooo long. Two days of sitting in silence is literally a blink of an eye.”

“What’s the Space Between?”

“It’s exactly what you’d think it was. Literally nothing exists, you just kind of float there for as long as you like. Kwamis that are in the miracle box can see each other down there, but if you’re not, well then it’s just the most boring expanse of nothing you’ve ever seen. I don’t actually know what it’s called, so I coined it as the Space Between.”

“Sounds fascinating,” Peter said earnestly.

“You’re weird,” Suluu chirped, taking the phone back from him and settling back down on the bed. “Fascinating is literally the exact opposite of everything that realm is. Can you ask May to bring some more of that spicy rice she’s making with her next time she comes in here? I can smell it and it’s making me hungry.”

“For sure?” Peter gave her an odd glance, then wandered back to the kitchen. Adrien and Felix were playing some sort of video game on their phones in the living room and May seemed to be done with the cooking portion of dinner and was now attempting to plate it all.

“How is she?” May asked, carefully pouring gravy into the gravy boat.

“Good, she wants, uh, spicy rice?”

“She is so much like you.” May flashed him a brilliant smile as she straightened up.

“She’s not my kid or anything,” Peter laughed, tapping his finger against his side. Suluu was his responsibility, but not in the way he imagined parenthood was. She was fairly independent and would never willingly let Peter think he was the superior. Rules meant nothing to her when he was the one establishing them, such as the ‘no swearing’ rule he’d tried to implement which had lasted for an entire twenty five minutes until the Dupain-Cheng bakery had been sold out of cinnamon buns. Then Peter had heard her list off possibly every swear word ever invented.

“Okay, but she’s so cute! It’s like I have my very own little grandchild, even if said grandchild is a god and also a phoenix.”

“Sure,” Peter agreed mildly, deciding to let her have this one. He was saved from any further discussion about grandchildren, bird or otherwise, by a knock at the door. That could only be one person.

“Tony Stark! Tony Stark is here!” Adrien all but screamed, smacking Felix’s phone out of his hands as Peter opened the door.

Mr. Stark was dressed in a crisp suit, far more dressed up than the rest of them and Peter was beginning to wish he’d brought the suit Adrien had given him.

“Happy thanksgiving, kid,” Tony said, giving Peter a crisp clap on the back as Peter invited him in, barely able to contain his grin.

“Mr. Stark, you remember Adrien,” Peter gestured to Adrien who had quickly stood up, standing extra straight.

“There’s two of him?” Tony glanced between Adrien and Felix.

“That one’s Felix, he’s Adrien’s cousin.”

And Felix, for once, was blissfully speechless, gazing at Tony Stark with wide eyes.

“Felix fought an Elmo in Times Square today,” Peter added as the silence became crushing.

“You fought an Elmo?” Tony turned to Felix with an impressed look. “Did you win?”

“I used the ippon seoi nage move to slam him into the ground,” Felix said, his expression returning to his usual neutral one. “There was no real fight.”

“Shut up,” Peter said. “You made us run afterwards.”

“Dinner’s ready!” May called.

The table was set with more food than Peter had ever seen May willingly make in one sitting. Every single thanksgiving food one could imagine was somewhere on the table, including Suluu’s spicy rice. It was an odd company as they seated themselves around the table, almost like a setup for a bad joke.

A superhero, fashion model, and a nerd sit down for thanksgiving dinner…, Peter thought to himself as he waited for his guests to take their portion of the meal. Adrien, poor, constantly starved Adrien, was loading up his plate with a literal mountain of mashed potatoes.

“Damn Goldie, do they not feed you in Paris?” Tony asked, eyeing Adrien’s plate.

“Adrien’s dad sucks,” Felix supplied, carefully carving the turkey without having been prompted to do so. “Since he’s a supermodel he has to be skinny.”

“Speaking of supermodels,” Tony began, giving Peter a mischievous smile, “Peter, how about that-”

“How about the resurgence of lace in men’s fashion?” Peter cut in hastily, not entirely prepared for May to find out about his stint in modelling. “Because I was just thinking about that. The uh, lace hemmed suit jacket in the latest winter spread for the Agreste brand, that was really quite innovative for winter, given that lace is generally a spring fabric. Ahaha.”

Everyone at the table stared at him.

“I wasn’t…aware…that you knew that much about fashion,” Adrien braved the silence; really a bold move on his part.

“I mean, I hear a thing every now and again while I’m hanging around your photo shoots, you know,” Peter shrugged. He honestly hadn’t even known he knew that much about fashion until he’d said it aloud, not that it had been a groundbreaking statement or anything further than a simple observation.

“Paris is making you into a man!” May said delightedly. “He even got a proper suit and everything.” The second part of her statement was addressed to Tony, who laughed.

“If you needed a suit, kid, you should’ve come to me!”

“I’ve got plenty of suits, thanks,” Peter said, accepting the slice of turkey that Felix offered him. “Pass the butter, if you would, Adrien.”

“Are you putting butter on turkey?” Adrien asked, expression suggesting that he regretted passing the butter as Peter coated his turkey.

“Turkey is too dry usually,” Peter commented, unconcerned of what others thought of his eating habits.

“I can just see your chances of stroke increasing,” Felix commented as he speared each individual pea on his fork prongs before bringing it to his mouth, one at a time. It was almost mesmerizing.

The dinner continued with friendly banter, Adrien and Felix growing slightly more comfortable around Mr. Stark, or at least comfortable enough to shoot the occasional snide remark in Peter’s direction.

Once dinner was over, May and Adrien headed into the kitchen to prepare tea and hot chocolate, Adrien claiming he made fantastic hot chocolate and prepared to back it up with a demonstration. That left Peter, Mr. Stark, and Felix alone at the table.

“Say, Felix, you seem pretty smart,” Tony began, inspecting Felix over his glasses. “How would you feel about doing a little paid internship at Stark Industries? I’m sure we could set something up so you can do it while still in London, but you’re the kind of person we’d like on our team.”

Felix’s jaw dropped, properly emoting for the second time that night. “Just like Peter?”

“Well, Peter does something a little different, but yes, something along those lines.”

“Mr. Stark, I don’t know what to say.” Felix blinked hard, then swallowed harder. “I’m extremely honoured and I would be happy to accept.”

“Welcome to the team,” Tony held out a hand to shake Felix’s. “We’ll get you to do some training and sign some non-disclosures before you leave, but I think I’ve got the perfect job for you.”

“Really?” Peter and Felix chorused in unison.

“Well you see, not only am I Iron Man, but I’m also in charge of Spiderman, you may have heard of him, and I’ve been beginning to think that Spiderman needs his own manager, someone to manage his schedule and organize press conferences, the works, and I think you, Felix, might be the man for the job.”

“Mr. Stark!” Peter groaned running a hand through his hair. What the hell is happening? Why Felix? Why anyone?

“Does that mean I get to know Spiderman’s identity?” Felix asked eagerly.

“No idea,” Mr. Stark said, flashing Peter one of his famous smiles. “It’s up to him.”

“Hey Peter, don’t you work with Spiderman too?” Felix was actually smiling a genuine smile. He looked more like Adrien when he smiled, Peter noted.

Internally, Peter’s brain was screaming and setting off all sorts of alarms.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHRGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

“Yeah, yeah I do,” he said, calmly and collectedly as May and Adrien returned to the room, carting hot chocolate and tea.

“Peter will get you Spiderman’s number,” Tony said, pulling a business card out and handing it to Felix. “Call this number when you’re back in London and we’ll get you started on the job.”

“Mr. Stark?” Peter stood up, ignoring the questioning gazes of those around him. “Can I talk to you for a moment?”

The only space that wasn’t overrun by guests, human and kwami alike, was Peter’s bedroom, so together he and Tony Stark strolled into the room, Peter shutting the door firmly behind them before wheeling on his mentor.

“What are you doing?” Peter said, waving his hands erratically.

“It’s about time Spiderman got a manager,” Tony supplied, inspecting one of the Lego Star Wars sets on Peter’s desk.

“I thought Happy was already my manager!”

“Happy’s your handler, there’s a difference. Plus, he’s the head of my security. Now that you’re getting to be a big deal, you need your own team and Felix seems like the right person for the job. He’s pushy, I like that.”

“Pushy is good?”

“He seems like the kind of person who could get the…president? Prime minister? Of France and-”

“Both,” Peter supplied. “President is head of state, prime minister is head of government.”

“-and lay it out straight. When you come across people like that, you gotta take advantage of that fact because if you don’t, your enemies will.”

“I don’t really think it’s so much of a battle between good and evil, I mean if you didn’t recruit Felix, he might’ve gone on to become an accountant or something.…” Peter shifted his weight awkwardly. He really didn’t want to entrust Felix with Spiderman, but it didn’t look like Mr. Stark was giving him a choice.

“And have his talents wasted? I don’t think so!”

“Or Wall Street,” Peter mumbled. “I could see him working on Wall Street….”

Just wait until Ned hears about this one.