To Build A Home

The dinner was fine.

Peter stayed quiet the whole time and ate his food which was amazing. He couldn’t remember the last time he had a cheeseburger that was so good.

He listened to the family talk about nothing in particular. He learnt that Morgan was at the top of her swim class and that she had over one thousand teddy bears which Peter was dying to see.

He was a sucker for anything soft so to see one thousand teddy bears, that would be fun for him and he would probably claim a few.

As the dinner went on, he learned about how Tony and Pepper met and how it took them ten years to fall in love with each other and actually admit it to one another. Peter didn’t understand why someone would want to wait ten whole years to wait for happiness like that… it seemed like a waste of time to him.

It was nice to listen to his fa- the family talk. They tried to include him but he stayed quiet and gave one word answers.

Tony did the same.

Peter didn’t understand why Tony was so shy. It wasn’t like he had any reason to be but he barely said a word and every time he looked at the man, he had a smile on his face.

After dinner was over, Peter sat at the edge of the pool and watched Harley and Morgan swim some more but he didn’t want to get in.

It was hard to watch the siblings play fight and be so free and comfortable around each other. Peter knew that he was supposed to be fitting in there somewhere but he wasn’t and that hurt.

Later that night, after dinner and after they all went inside, Tony walked into the kitchen where Peter was sitting on the kitchen stool drinking a smoothie and spoke. “Are you cold? You’ve been in that damp bathing suit all day.”

Peter shrugged. He was cold now only because he was half naked and drinking a cold drink. “A little.”

“I got some stuff for you to change into after you shower.” Tony said, holding out his arm for Peter to follow him.

Peter turned back to his drink and looked inside. “I’m not done my drink yet.”

Tony let his arm fall to his side. “Alright… well, when you are done, can you come upstairs into mine and your m- Pepper’s bedroom?”

Peter just nodded his head. The truth was, he wouldn’t mind if Tony had slipped up and called Pepper his mom. Maybe it would have felt good to hear.

Tony left after that, leaving Peter alone.

It took Peter twice as long to finish drinking his smoothie. He didn’t want to go upstairs and listen to what they were going to say to him. He didn’t want to do anything but go back home.

When Peter finished, he slowly put his cup into the sink and went to walk upstairs but he found Morgan sitting on the kitchen steps leading up to the hallway. He paused.

“Hi. Are you coming to live with us forever now?” She asked him but Peter didn’t know the answer to that question.

Instead, he said what he would want to happen. “No. I’m going back home next time Natasha comes.”

Morgan frowned and tilted her head at Peter. “Why?”

“Because my dad is waiting for me.” Peter answered, not knowing if Steve was waiting for him or not. He hoped so.

“Oh. Well… daddy said that he’s your daddy too so…”

“Well… he’s not.” Peter crossed his arms and looked at the girl. She was annoying because she asked too many questions.

Him and Morgan stared at each other for a few long seconds before Morgan was standing up and walking to the hallway but stopping to look back at Peter. “Can I show you my one thousand teddy bears now?”

A faint smile appeared on Peter’s lips. “Yeah.”

He followed the six year old girl down the hallway but stopped at a door which Peter guessed was the basement. “Open it because I can’t.”

Peter looked at the child safety lock but paused. He didn’t know how to open it either but he tried anyway. He struggled at first but two people needed to open it at once. “Turn it as well.”

Morgan did as she was told and then with the two of them opening a door that wasn’t meant to be opened by them, opened up.

“Yay!” The six year old cheered so she turned the light on on the side wall and started to walk down the stairs.

Peter followed her down the stairs of the finished basement and noticed how giant the basement was once they got down there. There was an arcade room, a theatre, a small kitchen and a playroom.

“This way, Peter. We have to be quick because we’re not allowed down here.” Morgan whispered so Peter continued to follow her into the playroom and sat down on the fluffy carpet.

“Why aren’t we allowed down here?” Peter asked Morgan who gave him a look that said duh. He raised his eyebrows at her. “What?”

“Because… of the lock on the door, obviously. And I thought you were like daddy’s twin with how smart you are.” Morgan rolled her eyes at him which left Peter dumbfounded.

“Uh… well, I’m not daddy’s twin. I mean, dad, your dad, he’s not my dad.” Peter told her, it felt exhausting having to tell everyone this all the time.

Morgan didn’t answer him. Instead, she walked over to another door and opened it. “Follow me.”

“Another door?” Peter asked in disbelief then he stood up and followed her into another, smaller room that had plastic containers and toys everywhere. “Woah. It’s so cool in here.”

Morgan sat down on a mini slide that was in the room so Peter followed her and sat down on the floor.

“This room,” She spread her arms wide for emphasis. “is where I keep all one thousand of my teddy bears.” She then opened up a bin and dumped it, emptying about fifty teddy bears onto the ground.

Peter stretched his legs out in front of him and grabbed a pile of the teddy’s. “Woah.”

Back upstairs, Tony walked down the stairs and ran a hand over his face. It was past ten at night and usually, he would have Peter in bed at eight but because everything was still so new to them, he would let them adjust to everything first.

Tony walked into the kitchen but he didn’t see Peter there. “Peter?”

Tony’s immediate reaction was to look at the back door to see if Peter ran out but they had over five doors leading to outside. Although every single one of those doors were locked and had an alarm on them so if Peter opened one, they would know.

He felt his heart start to pound a bit as he walked across the hall and into the next room but still no sign of Peter. “Peter? Where are you?”

Tony started picking up his pace, he ran upstairs and down towards the end of the hallway, barging into Harleys bedroom.

“Hello, dad?” Harley said annoyed at Tony not knocking but Tony didn’t care.

“Is Peter in here?” Tony asked but he didn’t see his other son.

That got Harley concerned now. “No. Why? You can’t find him? Did he leave the house?”

Tony was already walking back down the hallway. He walked back into his own bedroom because maybe he missed Peter walking up. “Pepper, is Peter in here?”

“No. I thought you were going to get him?” Pepper asked, already putting down the clothes that she was folding and making her way past Tony and Harley to rush down the stairs.

Both boys followed behind her and rushed down the stairs. Harley checked the front door while Pepper ran towards the kitchen.

Tony was about to have a fucking panic attack if they didn’t find Peter soon. It was almost like that day they first lost Peter seven years ago.

What a fucking nightmare that day was.

Tony ran shaky hands through his hair just as Pepper spoke up. “Tony. The basement door is open.”

Tony walked over to her and saw that it was in fact opened and the light was on.

He ran down the stairs without a second thought and heard laughter which had him sighing in relief but he didn’t know what Peter was laughing about. He was by himself.

He followed the sounds and saw that the door to Morgan’s teddy bear collection was open so he already knew who was the mastermind behind this.

He stood in the doorway. “What is going on down here?”

Both Peter and Morgan froze.

The smile fell from Peter’s face as he turned towards Tony and looked up at him with wide eyes.

“I’m sorry, daddy. I just wanted to show Peter my one thousand teddy bears.” Morgan said, standing up and going over to hug Tony.

Tony placed his hand on her head just as Pepper appeared in the doorway. “Morgan. It’s past your bedtime.”

Tony looked back at Peter who looked like he was waiting to get screamed at and that broke Tony’s heart. He wondered if that man that screamed at his son for doing something bad.

He squatted down so he was closer to Peter’s level. “I’m sorry.” Peter said, barely above a whisper.

Tony gave him a reassuring smile. “It’s okay. No one is mad at you. We were just scared, that’s all.”

Peter slowly nodded his head but he was still waiting to get a slap across the butt and get sent to his bedroom. Although… he had no room here.

“How about Morgan shows you her abnormally large collection tomorrow when it’s not past bedtimes? Then you guys can do whatever you want down here then.” Tony told Peter but also for Morgan to hear.

Peter nodded his head quickly with his mouth still hung open. Tony stood up and grabbed onto Morgan’s hand so Peter took that as his opportunity to stand up as well and follow the three of them upstairs.

On the way up, Tony passed by all of the bottles of alcohol and thought that he would never feel the urge to come down and almost drink himself into a coma whenever the overwhelming mourning of Peter gets too much to bare.

They all made their way upstairs and found Harley waiting for them at the top. Tony squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. He knew how hard it was for Harley to go down there after that one incident.

Tony had found Harley sitting at the bar with an empty bottle of vodka in front of him. Harley had gotten drunk for his first time just over a year ago because he missed his little brother so much and saw Tony doing it so he wanted to forget everything for a little while as well.

It was Tony’s fault.

He wasn’t mad at Harley but they did have a long talk about it the next day.

Harley hasn’t been down there since.

Tony picked Morgan up and set her on his hip. “I’m gonna bring her back up to bed.”

Pepper pressed a goodnight kiss to Morgan’s face and then Tony was leaving.

Peter watched Pepper shut the basement door and put the child lock back on. “Did you take this off, Peter?”

Peter shook his head. “Me and Morgan did.”

“Alright. We don’t want you doing that again, do you understand?” Pepper told him but it didn’t sound like she was mad, more concerned.

Peter nodded his head and looked at Harley who looked like he hadn’t slept in days. He wondered if that was his fault.

When they all went upstairs, Harley went into his bedroom and Pepper led him back into the room where he slept last night. Peter stood there uncomfortably. He realized how tired he was now and how badly he wanted to change into comfortable clothes and fall asleep.

Pepper placed a stack of clothes on the bed and then handed a pair of pyjamas to him. Peter took them from her. “We ordered you some clothes earlier today so I washed them so they’d be ready for you to wear.”

“Oh. Thank you.” Peter said, standing there awkwardly and shifted his feet on the floor.

“Do you need help turning on the shower?” She asked him, already walking into the bathroom and turning the light on.

Peter followed her and placed his clean pyjamas on the bathroom counter top as he watched her turn the shower on. Peter had never been in a glass shower before. All the showers that he’d been in had curtains. This shower looked huge.

“If you need to turn it hotter or colder, it’s a bit tricky so you just pull it out and turn.” Pepper explained then opened up a long cabinet with mirrors on the outside and pulled out a towel. “I have a new toothbrush here for you as well. If you need anything else, I’ll be right outside, okay?”

Peter wanted to cry. Pepper was being so nice to him and he couldn’t help but want to run into her arms and beg her to hold him. He missed out on so much.

She went to close the bathroom door but Peter didn’t like it when doors were fully closed. “Wait! Can you just, I want it open a bit.”

Peter opened the door so it was not completely shut. He didn’t know why he always had that weird habit. He just liked it when he didn’t feel trapped somewhere.

Once he felt better, he undid the tie in his bathing suit and stepped out of it.

When Peter walked into the shower, a smile spread across his lips at how cool it was. There were three jets in the shower which weren’t on but he was excited to possibly see what they could do one day.

He let the water wash over him and grabbed some shampoo bottles to see which one smelt the best so he could use it in his hair.

After he was done, it took a few seconds for him to figure out how to turn off the water.

Once he figured that out, he stepped out of the shower and grabbed the towel to dry his hair off and wrap it around his shoulders.

He picked up the new toothbrush but looked around for the fruity toothpaste. Seeing none, he opened the door fully and saw that Tony had walked into the room. They both looked at him. “Um… where’s the fruity toothpaste?”

Tony stood up and walked into the bathroom so Peter stepped aside. “Uh, is there none in there?” Peter shook his head. “Well, we didn’t actually know what toothpaste you um, liked but I think Morgan has some in the bathroom so let me go check.”

Peter nodded his head and watched Tony leave the room. He put his toothbrush down and went to crawl onto the bed. He looked over at Pepper. “I’m not brushing my teeth without fruity toothpaste.”

“We have mint toothpaste if you-”

Peter was already shaking his head. “No. I won’t.”

“That’s okay.” She said. Peter wondered if it were Morgan or Harley if she would be saying that or if it was just him. Because she didn’t want to say no to him for whatever reason.

When Tony walked back into the room, he held up a fruity toothpaste. Peter slid off the bed and pulled his towel more secure around him. “Thank you.”

“Yeah, we’ll just be waiting outside.” Tony said and went to go shut the door but Peter yelled.

“No! Wait, just leave it half open.”

Tony left it open and sat down on the bed with Pepper. “We have to talk to him about getting stuff for his new bedroom.”

“I know. Should we save it for tomorrow night though? I don’t know how he’ll react to it tonight.” Pepper asked, they had a pretty good first day with their ups and downs but she didn’t want to end it on a bad note.

“No. He needs to get settled into his own bed in his own room. I want him to know that this is permanent.” Tony pulled his computer onto his lap but saved space so Peter could sit next to him and not in the middle.

Peter walked out of the bathroom, dressed in his new pyjamas that actually fit him. Tony and Pepper both silently cooed.

“Um, where am I going to sleep?” Peter asked, followed by a yawn.

“You’re going to sleep here again but first Pepper and I want to get some things for you first.” Tony patted the spot next to him but Peter didn’t move.

“Then where will you guys sleep?” He asked, making no move to climb onto the bed.

“Well, we have some things that we need to do so we won’t be sleeping any time soon.” Pepper answered for Tony then Peter made his way over to the bed and climbed on.

He began looking around the bed for something and after a few seconds of him looking, Tony asked, “What’re you looking for?”

“My blanket.” Peter answered then sat up on his knees and pulled the blankets back roughly.

“Woah, okay. Um, let’s do that calmly.” Tony spoke and moved a bit so he could help Peter look for the blanket. He pulled the part of the bed down that he was sitting on and grabbed it. “Found it.”

“You were sitting on it?” Peter asked as he snatched the blanket from Tony.

Tony stared at him. “Yeah, sorry, Pete. He didn’t say anything so I couldn’t hear him.” Tony joked but Peter was still looking at him as if he had torn the blanket apart. “He’s alright, right, blankie?” Tony asked, joking around like he does for Morgan but Peter was now looking at him with a boring look on his face.

“I’m not a baby.” He said then got comfortable on the bed.

Tony knew that. Peter was stolen from them when he was a baby but to Tony, Peter would always be his baby. It was so hard to picture him any other way with Peter sitting there with his blanket clutched against his chest.

He looked away to pull his computer back onto his lap. “We ordered you some clothes but we obviously need to get more. But right now, we need to order some things for your bedroom.”

Once Tony said that, Peter tensed up. “But… I’m going back with Natasha in two days so there’s really no point.”

Tony didn’t know what to say or do to get Peter to understand that this was permanent. He wasn’t going to leave them again.

“Peter,” Tony said, turning to his side so he was fully facing Peter. “this situation is permanent. You were always supposed to be with us. You aren’t going back to what is now, your old life.”

Peter shook his head and covered his face with the blanket. “It’s not permanent. Everyone keeps saying that and it’s not.”

“Peter,” Pepper reached over Tony to place her hand on Peter’s back. “we all love you so much. We’re your family and I know it’s really hard for you but-”

“No!” Peter screamed and rolled onto his side so Pepper could stop talking and touching him. “I just want to go back home. To my dad! You guys j-just won’ let me!”

Peter let out a violent sob and turned around so he was facing away from the two people who claimed to love him. If they truly did, they would let him go.

“You’re our son, Peter. You do not belong with the man who you think is your father.” Tony tried not to let that burn. It hurt so much to hear his son call his kidnapper the title that he was supposed to receive.

Peter lifted his head up and wiped at his cheeks. “When-when my daddy comes back for me… I’ll have to c-choose him or you guys and I’ll choose him.”

Both parents stayed silent.

That was possibly the worst thing Peter could ever say to them.

Tony would be okay if Peter swore at him and told him that he hated his guts because that was all the anger speaking but this, this was something that Peter had been thinking about. This had been on his mind ever since he got there and he would choose his kidnapper over his real family.

It fucking hurt.

Pepper got off the bed and walked out of the room. Tony watched Peter’s eyes follow her out of the room then they landed right onto Tony’s. Peter then looked away.

“I want to go home. Please Tony.” Peter begged, voice shaky from crying.

Tony hated how he got the title ‘Tony’ and Peter’s kidnapper got the title ‘daddy’. It wasn’t fair.

“This is your home now, Peter. We can make it your home if you’d let us. But in order to do that, you need to get stuff for your bedroom, like a bed, a dresser, a desk, things like that.” Tony told Peter who was lying on his stomach and had his arm outstretched as if he wanted Tony to hold his hand.

When Peter stayed silent, Tony spoke again. “Do you wanna know what Harley told me today?”

Out of curiosity, Peter nodded his head. “Well… he told me that you like legos. Do you build a lot of legos?”

Peter wiped at his nose on the bed and sat up a bit. “Uh huh.”

“Yeah?” Tony loved how he was getting somewhere with his kid. “What kind of things do you build?”

Peter moved a bit closer and laid his head down. “Um… my lego Star Wars. And… and my best friend Ned’s mom got him the um, Death Star and we built it last week. It was fun.”

Tony got himself more comfortable on the bed, pushing his computer off to the side since he knew they wouldn’t get to that tonight. “That sounds like fun. What else do you and Ned like to do?”

“Um… he sleeps over at my house sometimes. I’m not allowed sleeping over at his house. And um, sometimes we go to the movies but only early movies because I’m not allowed out after dark.” Peter rubbed at his eyes and thought about all of the things that he wasn’t allowed to do in his life that other children were allowed to do.

Now he knew why.

Tony listened to Peter talk and his heart broke for him even more. “So this is your first time sleeping anywhere else but your own bed?”

Peter nodded his head. “Uh huh. I guess. Well, sometimes we go to his friends house and me and my um, well, me and my dad went to a hotel but I wasn’t allowed to leave our room. He was. I wasn’t.”

“I’m sorry.” Tony whispered. He didn’t know what he was saying sorry for. Everything for the past seven years. For not finding Peter sooner. For letting him leave his sight all those years ago.

Peter didn’t reply. He rubbed at his eyes and held his blanket to his chest, shutting his eyes. “You’re not the one who has to say sorry to me.”

Tony didn’t exactly know who Peter was referring to but he had an idea. “How about we order some stuff tomorrow? You get some sleep.”

With a slight nod, Peter shut his eyes and heard Tony stand up, turn the bathroom light on then leave the bedroom.

Tony leaned against the hallway wall and sighed. He knew that this was not going to be easy for any of them but at least they were getting somewhere.