Chapter 66
*Trigger Warning. Sexual abuse, violence*
*Flashback*
Buck P.O.V.
I never believed people when they say that being in jail as a firefighter or police officer is rough. At the bottom are the people who abuse children and a few places above that it's our place. Can't believe the people in here hate us more than murderers. It's crazy.
The boys in my cell hate me. Always making fun of me. I just lie here, staring at the wall while thinking.
I know that one of them is here because of robbery and the other one is a rapist...it doesn't feel good to be here...seems like these two know each other very well.
Officer: okay time to shower Buckley *opens the door* hands *puts handcuffs on his wrists*
Jeff: bye bye *grins*
Mike: *whispers* so he's fresh when he comes back *grins*
I heard what Mike was whispering. I slowly walk to the bathroom. The officer takes off my handcuffs and I get a towel and a clean overall. Time to shower. I hate these group showers. I feel like everyone is staring at me. I shower as fast as I can and put back on clothes.
Back in my cell it's time for dinner. To be honest it doesn't look good. Smells like puke. I decide to not eat it.
Jeff: you don't want your food?
Buck: no take it if you want. *sighs*
Mike: it's actually really delicious.
Buck: Good for you *sighs and turns towards the wall*
I hear them whisper something I don't understand. Around 10pm the officers make their last round to check if everyone is in their cell and is in his bed. The lights are out in the cells now. Only lights outside. It's so quiet. I hear one of the guys moving in his bed.
I close my eyes and try to sleep. Suddenly one of the boys is sitting on me. I want to scream but he covers my mouth with his hand. I try to get rid off him but it doesn't work. He turns me on the stomach and sits on my back. His hand still on my mouth. No chance to get him off me.
Mike: gosh Jeff come on help me. *whispers*
Jeff: just punch him
Mike: but it's not that much fun when he's unconscious
A few seconds later I get kicked into the side and I whimp in pain.
Jeff: it doesn't have to be the head *grins* you better be quiet now Buckley. You don't want to see what happens if you scream *grins and whispers into Bucks ear*
I'm scared. I don't know what they want to do. I stop moving and wait for the next punch. Nothing is happening. They tear up my overall.
I just hope that they don't do what I'm thinking right now. I have a bad feeling.
When he starts touching my butt I try to get rid off him again. I don't want this to happen. I try to punch him but he pins my hands behind my back.
Buck: please *whispers* please don't...
Jeff: that's cute *grins* now come on Mike. Before Someone notice. I want to have my fun as well.
I just close my eyes. It hurts...tears roll over my cheeks. A few times I try to get rid off them but no chance...Jeff starts to punch me while he's on top of me because I'm trying to get him off.
Mike: cute he's crying *grins* that was good. We should definitely repeat that
Jeff: *gets off him* for sure. Oh and Buckley, you should ask an officer for a new overall. Yours is broken. Good night Mike
Mike: good night Jeff *yawns*
I'm scared to move. My body hurts. Tears roll over my face. I just have to hope that it's not Officer Kendall tomorrow morning...he would freak out if he sees my overall...
Of course it was him next morning...now I have a blue eye.
This torture continues for a few weeks. I stopped counting how often they abuse me...this has to end...
We are outside. Our normal hour of fresh air. I'm alone as always. Mike and Jeff are coming towards me with their friends. I don't understand what they are saying.
Jeff: so if you want to try it *grins*
Buck: try what? *insecure*
Mike: cute how he doesn't know what we are talking about. They want to try you.
Buck: I'm not a toy.
Jeff: for us you are a toy. A pretty good one. Sometimes he's a little, how can I say that, uncooperative.
Mike: but he likes it the rough way so just do whatever you want to do. *grins* am I Right Buckley?
Buck: I'll kill you *angry*
Jeff: oh the little boy is getting mad. Thought this could never happen
I try to ignore it but it's enough. I jump onto Mike and he falls to the ground. I start to punch his face. I can feel his nose break under my fist. I don't stop.
Buck: you stupid son of a bitch!! *continues punching*
Suddenly an officer pulls me off him and puts on the handcuffs. I send angry glances at Mike.
Buck: trust me, I'll kill you! You abused me!
Mike: officer he just jumped on me. I didn't do anything. We were just standing here. He's crazy.
Officer: come on Buckley.
He pushes me towards the door. He doesn't bring me back to my cell. At least one good thing. We stop in front of other cells. He opens the door and pushes me inside. Only one bed. I'm alone. He takes off the handcuffs.
Officer: you stay here the next week. No going out for you. No shower. Maybe think about it next time. *angry* with that behavior you can't get out earlier.
I sigh. To be honest this was a good week. No abuse or other things. Right when I got our Mike showed me how angry he is. I can still feel it when he was fucking me...not in a good way...
It continues...abuse, punches, other cell for a week or two and then it starts again. No officer ever says something. I just get angrier every time. I feel like a piece of shit....when they are abusing me I just lie there. I know that it doesn't help to fight it...
One time didn't end well...both freaked out and hit my head against the wall...I don't remember much of that night...I just remember waking up on the Infirmary. I have a bad concussion and a wound on my forehead. They finally noticed it because I was bleeding...they noticed it after more than 4 months of abuse...they counted one and one together and finally Mike and Jeff got what they deserved.
Two weeks later I get released. I couldn't be happier. I still remember their last words to me.
Mike: look out Buckley! When I get out of here you don't want to meet me. Trust me. *yells*
*End of flashback*
I sit up in my bed. I'm sweating. I can still hear his moans in my head and what he said before they took him to a different cell...will i ever forget? Is that the reason why I'm like that?...is it worth to continue living?....