A Poisoned Touch

“Ohhhh, me and Clint were right!” Tony spun to smack Loki, who just shrugged him off.

“Steven, love, are you well?” Thor was there, right in front of him, he must have pushed them both back from the table. He looked up into those blue eyes he loved so much and he finally started to come back to himself. He looked around the table, everyone was watching him, he wondered briefly if this was a panic attack, but no, he was just freaked out.

He took a deep breath and turned to Atmos, the man who had just upended his life in a way that Steve could never have planned for.

“How...uh. Um. How do you know? Is there records or?” He hated stumbling over his words, made him feel like the little kid that no one wanted anything to do with back in the 20’s.

“There are two ways. First, if you would show me your sigil, that is the easiest, most visible way to know. All Soros are born with them, but the royal lines are different from the commoners. And secondly, and a tad less noticeable to anyone not from our planet; your eyes.”

“My eyes? My ma always said I got them from my da, he died in the first great war.” Well, now he knew that wasn’t true. His da was really a man he never knew and his father was a king?

Perhaps the man to his side recognized how hard this was for Steve, he softened his voice. “Your eyes are blue with green and gold, yes? The gold flecks are a constellation. The one that all royal family members are born under.”

“Wow.” Of all the people Steve didn't expect to be moved by this, Nat was sitting across from him, enraptured with the proceedings. “Steve, learning who you are like this, there are some people who never get this chance.”

He nodded, unsure that he could speak without sobbing. Thor gripped his hand tightly, a way to ground him.

“Steven, I would never go so far as to denounce what your ma did for you. She must have been incredibly strong to raise a child who came from someone else. Your history is still your history, this is merely an addition. I want you to come with me to your birth home. I want to show you where you come from. I want that, but I will not force that. This is your decision. Our world, while sick, has still survived.”

“I want…” He cleared his throat. “I want to go. See your world. It is..”

“A lot. I am aware.” Atmos finished.

Steve didn’t know what to do or say at this point. He kinda wanted to go bury himself in some blankets. Maybe cuddle his boyfriend for a while, pretend the world didn’t exist outside of the four walls of their bedroom. Thankfully, Loki came to his rescue.

“I am aware that we were meant to have an actual meeting, away from the dining table, however, Steven has had a great shock and I think we can agree that what has needed to be discussed has been.” He looked around the table, all but daring anyone to interrupt him. “So, let us let Steven retire and have time to decide how he feels about what he’s learned. Minister Atmos, I would hope that your invitation for Steven to see Aerlion extends to us as well.”

“Indeed. Any friend to our prin-- um, to Steven, is welcome.”

“Wonderful.” Frigga said, standing. “ Thor, take Steven to the coast, it is a lovely place to think.”

“Yes, elskan, let us go. Perhaps a flight might help.” He stood, bodily pulling Steve up with him. “We will be back, father, if you have need, send us a raven.” Steve followed along docily, not honestly caring where they went. His mind was still set in freeze, trying to actively not think about what he just learned.

“Steven, elskan. Look at me.” Thor tilted his head up, and Steve realized that Thor must have been talking. “Can you ride? Or Should I call for a skiff?” Looking around he saw they were at the stables. Ah, riding a horse. Not a thing he had ever done before.

“A skiff, I have never ridden before.”

“Okay, thank you. Just hold on and I’ll get one. Just stay with me a bit longer, you can fall apart once we are alone.” Steve stood there wondering what he's doing in his life to deserve a man like Thor, who seemed to always be able to anticipate what he was needing. The skiff arrives, driven by a guard. Thor shows Steve how to climb in, it’s surprisingly a lot like some of the small aircraft that Shield uses, and they take off. The coast is a vague place to be heading, but it does not take long for him to see exactly where they are going.

Thor lands at a dock, and tosses a rope to tether the craft. It feels so old fashioned, so out of place for such a technologically advanced place. Thor leads up a rough path, putting the coast of the water to their backs. He wasn't sure if it was an ocean or a lake, but it was large. Up the path, they came across a cabin, or, what would pass as a cabin on Asgard.

“This is father’s hunting cabin. No one will bother us here. You are free to rage or cry, to fly if that will help. Just, as before, let me help.”

“I don’t know what I need. I feel like my whole life was a lie, my ma...I don’t…” And there were the tears he’d been holding back. He crumpled to the ground, and an instant later there were large arms wrapping around him. He wasn’t sure how long they stayed there, but eventually Thor scooped him up and carried him inside. They settled on a large, low couch and Thor’s arms tightened again. He vaguely recognized that Thor was humming or, or singing under his breath as they sat there, but he was busy trying to stop the sobbing to really pay much attention. Whatever he was doing, it was soothing enough that after a few more minutes he was able to calm down. He pulled back and found Thor watching him. His face was a mix of fondness and worry and Steve buried his face in his chest, rubbing his wet eyes on the cape that had bunched up under his face.

“Thank you.” Steve murmured.

“It is always my pleasure to hold you.’

“I keep crying all over you.”

“I am glad. Glad Steven. You held it all inside you for so long, would not accept help for so long, it is good you are letting it out.” One large hand kept patting his back.

“Not very leadery of me.” He sniffled. Thor put his hand on Steve’s neck and gently pried his face away from his chest.

“Steven. It is very leadery of you. As you say. Emotions are human. Aesir even. There is no shame in your tears, if I accomplish anything in the time I get to spend with you, it will be to teach you that it is quite manly to show your emotions.” He pressed a kiss to Steve’s lips and pulled back. “You have had a shock, a big one. I would be more worried if it didn’t make you upset.”

“I’m not upset. I don’t think. Well, to be honest, I’m not sure what I’m feeling. Betrayed maybe, lost, definitely. And worried about next steps.”

“Let us break it down into achievable actions.”

“You sound like your brother.” Steve teased.

“Good, he is smarter than I.” Thor added with a wink. “And he would tell you to start with the easiest problem first. So, what do you mean by lost? You are still Steven Grant Rogers of Brooklyn. Learning this new thing does not take that away. Your ma, may her soul rest in Valhalla, was still your ma. She raised you. She loved you. This new thing does not change that.”

“Yeah, I guess. Remember when we spoke to Eir, they said something similar. I guess, it’s hard to reconcile that who I am, doesn’t change because who I was supposed to be.”

“It is like a desert.” Steve snorted but Thor carried on. “Some people like plain cake. But some people like frosting, or berries, or honeycomb. So you start with the base and the more we learn, makes you tastier.” He leans in to nip at Steve’s nose making him grin and wiggle it.
“So, what you’re saying is you wanna bite me.”

“Always my love.”

“I wanna go. I wanna see. Will you come with me?” He thought that might be the thing that scared him the most, going to this new planet. He was a prince, apparently, what if he got there and then couldn’t leave? What if his people were awful?

“You would have to pry me off of you, my love.” Thor grunted when Steve pushed back into his arms again, burying his face in the crook of his neck.”

“‘Ank u.” He mumbled into Thor’s skin. It had taken no time at all for the smell of a thunderstorm that followed Thor around to become a soothing scent.

“You know, I have long thought your eyes to be beautiful,“ he levered Steve up again, to look him in the eyes, “but now that I know what to look for, I see they are even more gorgeous. You have starlight in your eyes, elskan. It is extraordinary, just like everything else about you.”

“You...I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I am so grateful. You now I’m stupidly in love with you?”

“You deserve the best of everything. I will admit I am glad to hear that you hold me in that regard. And I love you too, more than I thought possible.” They both learned in, and the kiss that followed was everything. Comfort and love and lust and the easiest way to show him how important he was to Steve. When they pulled apart Steve was thinking about dragging Thor to the big bed in the corner, but he remembered it was Odin’s and that was a bit much for him.

“Can we stay here tonight?” They could cuddle up on the couch, they would fit.

“Aye. Let me send a raven back to the palace. And I will change the bedding. I do not know how long it has been there. Father has servants come out and freshen everything up when he plans to spend time here, but this was an unexpected trip.” He pressed a kiss to Steve’s forehead. “You sit here, I shall get some ale, and be right back.”

Steve watched Thor move about the cabin, it was one big room, so it was easy to not lose sight of him. He switched out the sheets, wrote out a note to attach to the raven that appeared at the window. When he came back he had a tray with a bottle of ale and two glasses. There wasn't any food in the cabin, or not any fresh food, so if they wanted to eat one of them would have to either go hunt or find the nearest village. But for now this was enough.

In the morning they would fly back to the palace, and he would apologize to his friends again, for leaving them. And he would plan a trip to his home planet. He would learn to accept this new piece of his past, But that was for tomorrow. For today, he was with the man he loved in a remote cabin, and he could just be. That was enough.