Chapter 20
Being back at the apartment really helped Peter realize how much he wants to stay at the tower. Before, he knew that he didn’t really want to go back, but also didn’t feel completely in place at the tower, but when he felt scared with John and May the only place he wanted to be was with Tony and Pepper. He feels less confused about why he even left, and knows he made the right decision to leave. He is nervous about tomorrow, though. He expects May will still want him to spend the day with her, probably at their apartment. He doesn’t think he can go back though, but May will also be disappointed if he doesn’t. She won’t want to come to the tower, because John wouldn't be welcome and she wouldn’t want to leave him alone on Christmas. He doesn’t know what to do.
He walks into the kitchen where he finds Tony and Pepper looking at a tablet together and talking in hushed voices. When they hear him walk in, they stop talking and look up, giving him warm smiles.
“Hey kid, you must have been really tired last night,” Tony chuckles.
“What?”
“You slept in longer than you ever have here,” Pepper explains.
“Oh,” Peter responds, going for an apple. Before they can say anything else, Peter blurts out “What’s going to happen tomorrow?”
“Funny enough, I was just about to ask you the same thing,” Pepper says with a smile, “what would you like to do?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think May would come here, and I don’t really want to go there, but I also still want to see her.”
“Do you want to ask May and see if she would come here? She may say yes,” Pepper tries.
“But what if she doesn’t?”
“Let’s cross that bridge when we get to it. That is if you want to ask her to come over,” Tony says.
Peter hadn’t thought about that. He does want to see her, but he’s also kind of scared about the whole scenario. He thinks he owes it to May though to at least see her.
“I’ll ask.” He pulls out his phone to text her, and frowns when only a few seconds after he presses send does May try to call him. He doesn’t really want to talk to her on the phone about it, but he also doesn’t want to be rude. He stands up and starts to walk down the hall before answering, “Hey May.”
“Hey Peter, I saw your text. I would love to spend Christmas with you!” Peter lets his hopes get up for a second before she continues, “But I don’t want to spend it at the tower. You should come down for the day, we can spend it like every other year.”
“I don’t really want to May. Why can’t you just come up here?”
“Honey, you saw Tony and John, I can’t bring him to the tower, they wouldn’t have it.”
“Why can’t you just come?”
“Peter. I can’t leave John all alone on Christmas, that would be terrible. Don’t be so mean, honey.”
“I’m not being mean-”
“Peter, just come down for Christmas, spend the day with your actual family, yeah?”
“I want to spend it with you, I just don’t want to spend it with John.”
“If you want to spend Christmas with me, then you're also going to have to spend it with John, at our apartment. That is the only way we'll be able to spend it together. I just want to be with you Peter, this day is for families, and I am your family. I want nothing more than to spend it with you, honey. If you just visit us here-”
“I don’t want to May!” Peter shouts. It’s silent on the other end for a couple of seconds, he can only hear his own breathing.
“I don’t know what to tell you Peter, only that this is breaking my heart.” May hangs up. He can only stand there for a minute, breathing hard, trying to calm himself down so he doesn’t cry or kick something. He feels like he’s lost her. He hears steps coming from his right, and sees Tony and Pepper walking towards him, looking concerned and worried.
“She’s not coming,” is all he says to them. They walk up and both wrap him in a tight hug.
“I’m sorry, Pete,” Tony says. Pepper is whispering soothing words into his hair and all he wants to do is cry, so he does. He feels like he’s really lost her now. He feels a little relieved, especially since he won’t be seeing John tomorrow, but also a little sad that he won’t see May. Because he won’t go back to that apartment. No matter what. He doesn’t want to step even a toe in there for the rest of his life. In this hug, though, those feelings are not overwhelming, more secondary, really. He mostly feels safe and loved, and that’s all thanks to Tony and Pepper.