Chapter 5
May stands there, looking towards the door for a few seconds before exhaling forcefully. Peter can’t tell if it’s from relief or exhaustion. The door slam echoes in Peter’s ears. He doesn’t move. “I’m sorry,” Peter hears himself say. He’s not exactly sure what he’s saying sorry for; staying at Tony’s? Leaving without telling her? Causing John to act like that? He doesn’t know. Maybe all of it.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” May responds.
“It’s okay. It’s not your fault.” Peter feels like his tongue is too thick to talk. He can’t comprehend if he sounds different or not. His brain is moving too slow. May just looks at him sadly before reaching up and giving his arm a squeeze. She moves into the kitchen to finish the dishes.
He doesn’t know what to do, where to go. He’s still standing in the hallway. He turns to the left and walks past John and May’s room before walking into his room, closing his door behind him. The fear that held Peter frozen in place is gone. He doesn’t feel much now, he’s not numb but he can’t recognize any other emotions. He walks forward and sits at his desk. He leans to the left and pulls his physics textbook from his backpack beside his feet, setting it down on his desk. He opens it to page 217.
He has homework due Monday.
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He keeps checking his phone. He doesn’t really know why. He thinks he’s hoping for a text from Tony, or anyone really. He wants someone to text him and offer him a way out of this apartment, even if only for a bit.
John comes back after four hours. He always comes back. He doesn’t say a word about what happened earlier and neither do May or Peter.
Peter is in the kitchen reheating some leftover soup when he hears the key in the lock. He wishes he was in his room. John turns the handle, stepping through the door before taking off his shoes and locking the door behind him. Peter wills the microwave to go faster. John doesn’t like it when they open the microwave door before the time is up, so he just has to wait. He doesn’t turn to face him, acting as if he can’t take his eyes away from the timer.
John walks past them and goes into his and May’s bedroom. May’s shoulder slump before she stands from the couch and follows him with a quiet sigh.
The microwave beeps and Peter pulls out his soup, walking over and setting it on the coffee table. He eats it before waiting for it to cool. He doesn’t feel if it burns his mouth or not. After putting the bowl beside the sink he walks into his bedroom and sits at his desk.
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Peter finishes his physics reading and doesn’t know what to do with himself. He closes the textbook and stays sitting where he is. What do normal people do in their free time?
He is completely still on the outside but on the inside he is in turmoil. He feels like if he doesn’t get up and go punch something he is going to explode. Normally when he feels like this he would lay on the floor of his bedroom. It was rough and uneven hardwood, and he would turn and writhe and curl up and then stretch over and over again, until he felt the ache in his bones from laying on the unforgiving hard surface. And then he would lay there some more. Or he would have an almost painfully hot shower and sit on the tub floor, curled up with his knees pulled to his chest and his head resting on them. Or if he felt particularly bad, he would even lay on the hard floor of the shower and try to breathe with the water falling onto his face and curl up on his side until the feeling of imminent bursting would pass.
He is so relieved he hasn't had a shower yet today. If he had already had a shower he wouldn’t want May to notice him having a second, seemingly for no reason, so he would have had to figure out something else to do. But the floor of his room seems too soft for how terrible he is feeling. He is so glad he still has his shower of the day. He walks into the bathroom and starts the water, turning the dial as hot as it would go.
What do people do with their free time?