Chapter 5
The next day, Ned started asking his questions.
“You got bit by a spider?” Ned asked, appalled. Peter nodded. Excitedly, he said blabbered, “Can it bite me? It would probably hurt, though, right? You know what, whatever, even if it did hurt, I’d let it bite me. Maybe. How much did it hurt?”
“The spider’s dead, Ned,” Peter sighed, rubbing his forehead.
“Oh.” Long pause. “Do you lay eggs?”
“What!” Peter yelped. “No. That… no.”
Science Class: “Can you spit venom?” “No, Ned.” “Can you summon an army of spiders?” “No, Ned.”
History Class: “How far can you shoot your webs?” “I don’t know, shh.” “If I was you, I’d just stand on the edge of a building and just shoot as far as I could.” “Ned, pay attention!”
P.E., while an actor pretending to be Captain America talked about workouts: “Did you know him, too?” “Yeah, we met…. I stole his shield.”
Even while they were doing sit ups, Ned still asked questions while sitting on Peter’s knees. “Do Avengers have to pay taxes?”
“Yes, shh,” Peter grunted.
“What does Hulk smell like?”
“Shh.”
“I bet he smells nice.”
“Ned, shh!”
“Was Captain America cool, or was he, like, a mean old grandpa?”
“Ned, just be quiet, okay?”
“Hey,” Ned said abruptly, “can I be your guy in the chair?”
“My what?” Peter asked in confusion.
“You know,” Ned said, looking sheepish, “there’s a guy, wearing a headset, telling the other guy where to go? Like, if there was a burning building, I could tell you where to go, because there’d be screens around me, and I could be your guy in the chair.”
Peter frowned. “I don’t want you to get in trouble.”
Ned gave him a hopeful look.
“I’ll think about it, okay, Ned?” Peter said finally. He figured it would be easier and faster if he had someone telling him where all the trouble was, and in the meantime, he could still patrol.
His thoughts were interrupted by a conversation between Wade and his friends.
“Iron Man, Thor, Hulk,” said Betty Brant. “Kiss, marry, or kill?”
“Kill the Hulk,” said Seymour O’Reilly, “kiss Iron Man, marry Thor.”
“What about Spiderman?” Wade frowned. Peter froze.
“What about him?” Seymour asked, rolling his eyes.
“Did you see the bank security cam on YouTube? He fought off four guys.” Wade looked excited, and Peter blushed horribly. Ned sniggered quietly.
“Oh, my gosh, Wade’s crushing on Spiderman,” Betty teased.
“No way,” Seymour exclaimed.
“Kind of?” Wade said hesitantly. Peter’s eyes widened.
“Oh, gross,” Betty said. “No, not that,” she assured him when Wade frowned. “He’s probably, like, thirty.”
“I doubt that,” Wade said dryly.
“You don’t even know what he looks like,” Seymour pointed out. “Like, what if he’s seriously burned?”
“I wouldn’t care,” Wade shrugged, and Peter swallowed. “I would still live him for the person he is on the inside.”
“Aww,” Betty cooed.
“Shut up,” Wade complained, playfully shoving her shoulder.
“Peter knows Spiderman,” Ned blurted.
Peter blanched and glared at Ned as everyone silenced and turned in their direction.
“No I don’t!” Peter blurted, leaping to his feet. Wade looked faintly disappointed, and quickly, he said, “I, I mean-”
“They’re friends,” Ned offered, standing up too.
“Yeah right,” Flash sneered, stalking over. “Like Coach Porch and Captain America are friends.”
Wade’s eyes darkened with anger, and he shot Flash a dangerous look.
“I, I’ve met him,” Peter said shyly, “a couple times.” He turned and glared at Ned. “I’m just not supposed to talk about it!” he muttered through gritted teeth. Ned gave him an apologetic look. “But it’s through the Stark Internship,” he added, glancing at Flash.
“Well, that’s awesome,” Flash said with a mock smile. “You know what, maybe you should invite him to Wade’s party, right?”
“First of all,” Wade said coldly, “you were never invited, after you pushed Peter down the stairs. Secondly, you can’t just invite people.” He glanced at Peter. “You can totally come tonight, you don’t have to bring Spiderman. Your friends are invited, too.”
“Th-thanks,” Peter blushed.
The bell rang, and everyone got up and left. Peter turned and gave Ned a frustrated look. “What are you doing?” he demanded in a whisper.
“Did you hear him?” Ned responded, eyes shining. “Wade has a crush on you!”
“He has a crush on Spiderman,” Peter corrected. “What if he’s expecting someone older, more good-looking-”
“Peter,” Ned interrupted dryly, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but a lot of people think you’re hot.”
Peter blushed. “Wh-what? No.”
“And adorable.”
Peter swallowed and gave him a look full of longing despair.
“Dude,” Ned said gently, “you’re an Avenger-”
“Junior Avenger,” Peter corrected.
“If anyone has a chance with a senior boy, it’s you.”
Peter shook his head. Gosh, he was going to regret this.
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“I thought Wilford Wilson hated you,” Tony said.
“He does, but Wade said he and Mrs. Wilson were out,” Peter replied. “They’ll never know I was there.” Because he’d be spending most of it as Spiderman.
Happy stopped the limo in front of Wilson manor, where there were several people outside. An outdoor speaker was blaring Poker Face, by Lady Gaga. The front doors were open, and Peter could see more people inside.
There were so many more people than Wade had told him.
“Mr. Stark,” Peter whispered, “I don’t think I can do this.”
“Peter,” MJ said, “we’re with you all the way. If you’re uncomfortable talking to Wade, just avoid him.”
“It’s his party,” Peter choked.
“Hey, Pete,” Tony said gently, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I’ve got faith in you, buddy.” The look in his eyes said he meant more than just with guys; he meant with Spiderman, too.
Except Tony didn’t know he was going to turn Spiderman into a party trick.
“Thanks, Mr. Stark,” Peter said quietly, only slightly comforted. But he’d promised Ned, so he got out of the car.
“Peter,” Tony said, as soon as MJ and Ned were out of the car. Peter ducked down to look at him. “Have fun.”
Peter nodded nervously and shut the door. Happy drove off.
“Bye, Mr. Stark!” Ned shouted excitedly. As they walked up to the doors, he asked nervously, “Was he annoyed by me? I couldn’t tell.”
“No, I’m pretty sure he thought you were amusing,” MJ responded. “He had a little smile on his face. Bye losers, I’m going to go eat vegetables.”
“MJ is weird in an awesome way,” Peter noted. Ned nodded amusedly.
“Petey!”
Peter blushed horribly as Wade appeared in the doorway, looking delighted. “Oh, hey Ned,” he added, spotting him. “Where’s MJ?”
“She went to ‘go eat veggies,’” Peter responded. He giggled when Wade gave him a confused look.
“Don’t ask,” Ned replied.
“Cool hat, dude,” Wade grinned, and Ned grinned back. “I’m so glad you guys are here.”
Peter hopefully thought he meant, I’m so glad Peter’s here, but that probably wasn’t true.
“It’s a great party,” Peter said, still blushing.
“Thanks, man,” Wade beamed. There was a crashing noise, followed by drunken laughs.
“Aren’t you...?” Ned began.
“It won’t be a problem for Father, he’s a millionaire,” Wade scowled. He fixed a smile back on his face and said, “There’s pizza and drinks if you want them.” Then he disappeared.
“He really don’t like his dad, does he?” Ned said quietly.
“No,” Peter replied, feeling extremely concerned for Wade.
“Go spider it up!” Ned whispered, changing the subject.
Peter sighed. “All right.” Just this once, he told himself.
He found himself on the roof of the house opposite, pulling his clothes off to reveal his suit.
“Hey, what’s up guys, Peter called,” Peter said in a gruff voice, pulling his mask out of his coat pocket. “Hey, Ned, good to see you, hey, where’s Peter anyway?” He stared down at the party, swallowing. “This is stupid,” he told himself.
A faint explosion sounded. For a split second, Peter thought it had come from the party ⎯ more drunk idiots ⎯ but then he saw the same blue light that had come from the high-tech blow-torch and anti-gravity gun several miles away, in the middle of nowhere. Peter pulled on his mask.
“Duty calls,” he said in relief.
----------
Peter regretted everything.
It had started out simple enough. He’d figured out that the robbers had gotten their tech from people who were experimenting with the Chitari weapons, then selling them. He kept spying on the two who were trying to sell to another bad guy.
But things went downhill from there.
Peter’s cell-phone had gone off loudly (he really needed to put it on silent) alerting the bad guys that he was there. Peter flipped down so they would shoot at him instead.
Except, expecting them to lower the weapon, they didn’t. He fired another high-tech weapon at him and Peter had to do some fancy flips.
The next thing he knew, he was being dragged behind their van by a thin string of webbing, which instantly ripped.
For about twenty minutes, Peter managed to keep up with the van of weapons but not catch it. He had to take a short-cut. Just as he was about to leap on top of it, something big and heavy caught him in midair and pulled him into the sky.
The guy had giant metal wings. They had effing giant metal wings.
Peter was screwed.
The man dropped him when they were about five hundred feet above the lake. Peter screamed and tried to shoot webs somewhere ⎯ anywhere ⎯ but he was too far away. To his surprise, about three hundred feet from the lake, a parachute came out of his suit.
Except he was upside-down.
Peter crashed into the lake, and the parachute wrapped around him.
He was going to die. He was going to die without saying goodbye to his friends or kissing Wade.
Just before Peter blacked out, he saw a light shooting towards him. A familiar metal suit grabbed him and shot out of the water. Sobbing in relief, Peter wrapped his arms around the suit.
“It’s okay, Peter, I’m here,” Tony said frantically. “What happened? Who hurt you?”
“I d-d-don’t kn-know,” Peter rasped, his teeth chattering.
Tony set down by a park and opened his mask. He looked worried and furious. “I’m pretty sure I should ground you,” he grumbled. He patted Peter’s shoulder, and a blast of warm air filled the suit.
“Th-th-thanks,” Peter mumbled. “Please don’t ground me.”
“I’m not going to, you thought you were doing the right thing,” Tony said. “Also, I’m not your da ⎯ guardian, no matter how much I wish I was.” He pulled Peter’s mask off. “You could have called me.”
“Would have heard,” Peter said quietly, blinking. He was exhausted.
“Tell me everything,” Tony ordered.
“Um. Mr. Stark,” Peter said carefully. “Can this, you know, be, like, a test?”
“A test for… what?” Tony asked slowly, a faintly dangerous note in his tone.
Peter shrank slightly, and Tony hugged him again. “I want to go on real missions,” Peter said in a small voice. “I’m ready, Mr. Stark. I want to prove it to you.”
Tony was silent for a few moments. Then he said, “I’m keeping an eye on you. If it gets too dangerous, I will step in.”
“Thanks, Mr. Stark,” Peter said happily, refraining from hugging him back. He was sore all over. “You won’t regret this!”
Tony smiled at him, looking worried and affectionate at the same time. He kissed the top of Peter’s head and said, “I’ve got to get back to Loki, he’ll be worried about us both. Do you want to go home?”
“Let me call Ned first,” Peter said, letting go of Tony and pulling out his phone. How the crap was it still working?!
Ned answered on the second ring.
“Hey, Ned, sorry I bailed on you,” Peter apologized. Mr. Stark would think he meant ‘left Ned alone at the party’ instead of ‘not coming in as Spiderman.’
“That’s okay,” Ned sighed, “I was actually going to call you and tell you not to come. Mr. Wilson came home early and kicked me and MJ out.”
“What?” Peter demanded. “He can’t ⎯ just because you’re friends with me-”
“It’s fine, Peter.” Peter could hear his grin. “Listen.”
With Peter’s slightly heightened hearing, he could hear Wade shouting in the background.
“...don’t know why you hate Peter, because he’s adorable and sweet and cool, and his friends are cool too, I hate you…”
Peter blushed horribly. Then he said quickly, “Do you and MJ need a ride home?”
“Thanks,” Ned responded. “That would be great.” He paused. “Hold up, MJ’s here.”
“Hey, loser,” MJ said. “Where’d you go? Not that I care.”
Peter giggled. “Hey, MJ. I’m fine, I just… really had to get out.” That was basically true.
“You sound exhausted,” MJ said, a frown in her voice. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yes,” Peter replied. I am now.
There was a pause, and Peter could hear Ned talking to someone in the background.
“Hey, loser, your crush wants to talk to you,” MJ said quietly, sniggering.
“MJ!” Peter squeaked in protest.
“Hey, Petey,” Wade said in a very concerned, very angry voice. “Are you okay? You disappeared.”
“Hi, Wade. I’m fine,” Peter mumbled. “Big crowds make me uncomfortable.”
“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, I should have told you-”
“It’s not your fault,” Peter said quickly. “Are you okay? Ned said your dad came home early.”
“You’re really sweet, Petey,” Wade said warmly, and Peter blushed again. “I’m never speaking to him again, so, I’m ecstatic.”
Peter giggled. “Thanks for inviting us. Did MJ and Ned have fun?”
“A lot of people complimented Ned’s hat,” Wade replied. “I’m not sure about MJ, I can never tell what she’s feeling, but I’m pretty sure she had a good time.”
In the background, Peter heard MJ confirm, “It was a lame party.”
“That’s MJ for ‘she had fun,’” Peter translated before Wade could say anything.
Wade laughed. “I like you,” he said in a muffled tone, obviously addressing MJ. “Want me to hand you back to Ned, Petey?”
“Yeah, thanks,” Peter said, disappointed that Wade hadn’t told him that.
“Okay, see you at school Monday,” Wade sang.