haunted

April 7th, 2018

Wakanda, Africa

“-Never mind the damage you did to the armouring! You know it’s supposed to be bulletproof, not artillery-proof? And look at this. I can’t get blood out of this material! I’m gonna have to-”

Aleksandrina saw the second Shuri realised she wasn’t absorbing her rant. The young girl’s face tightened in a remarkable impression of her mother, and she scowled. “You’re not even listening, are you?”

“I’m sorry, Princess.” Aleks bowed her head slightly. Shuri’s scowl turned exasperated.

“It’s Shuri.” Shuri pouted slightly, leaning into Aleks’ space to meet her eyes. Aleks resisted the urge to recoil from her closeness. “I’m sorry too. You must be exhausted.” Her doe eyes were round in childish concern, and Aleks couldn’t help but smile gently at her.

She laughed slightly, reaching up to scratch her face. The mud she’d mostly washed off came flaking off under her nails. “I’m alright, Shuri.”

“Leave the suit with someone. I’ll probably have to scrap it and start over.” Shuri sighed dramatically, almost turning to go before her hand darted out to the small braid woven through with silver thread that hung next to her left ear. Aleks caught her wrist before she could reach it, before relenting and letting Shuri tug on it. She still remembered Shuri’s happy chatter as she sat and wove the braid, not two weeks after she had met the girl. Her heart was suddenly heavy with an ache she didn’t recognise, and she watched Shuri skitter away with something like longing.

She shook her head slightly, ridding herself of the emotion, and wincing at the ache in her neck and shoulders. Sam was in medical, Steve and Natalia already cleaned up and on a jet to the UK, and for the first time in a while, Aleks was alone.

She bypassed the med-bay entirely, stripping out of her suit and leaving it in the lab, and drifting invisible towards her rooms. She wasn’t in the mood for more prodding and poking, and she was feeling her mask slip. She was tired.

Aleks stood under the steaming spray, hands braced against the smooth tile of the backwall, trying to decide if it would be too much to just slide to the bottom of the shower. She wanted to. She wanted to melt into the hot water and spiral into nothing, because it was just so fucking-

Hands. Hands on the naked skin of her back and hip-

Aleks whirled with a snarl, the knife she had hidden behind the shampoo in her grip, already slicing down in a vicious stroke-

Her partner caught her wrist with ease, an almost smile playing around his mouth. His metal hand deftly snatched the knife from her grip, whilst the hand still on her hip tightened slightly. “Jumpy, huh?”

“Get out.” She didn’t know why she said it, she didn’t know why it came out with such venom, didn’t know why the sight of him made her so much more exhausted.

James blinked at her, a few water droplets falling from his lashes and running down the smooth planes of his face. “Aleks…” even his voice grated upon her. He looked…happy. Well – confused now, but still impossibly perfect. She felt like ash and dirt, and the blood staining the water at their feet. “Darlin’ – whoa!” She had stumbled – swayed really – losing her balance for a moment, as the rushing of the water drowned out everything else. It took her a moment to blink past the black dots swirling in her vision.

James eased her down to the floor, supporting most of her weight as she scrabbled weakly at the tiles. “Все хорошо.” I’m fine. She muttered, breathing in steam and avoiding his eyes. “I’m sorry for before.” It came out short and tense again, but he shook his head.

“Honey, you look terrible… and you’re still bleeding.”

She fixed him with a baleful look, close enough to see the myriad of blue and grey in his irises. “That tends to happen after missions.” She planted her palms under herself, and made to hoist herself up again. His arms bracketed her in, and he ducked his head even closer, and the water ran down their foreheads and dripped down their chins, and she felt the awful urge to cry. What was wrong with her?

“When did you sleep last?” He murmured to her, so quietly that if she hadn’t had enhanced hearing, she would have missed it.

Her instinct was to lie. She had already revealed too much weakness and there was worry in his eyes that she didn’t want him to be burdened with. But instead, she met his eyes and whispered just as softly; “I can’t sleep without you.” And I miss you. She almost said it. she almost admitted to the one person that shouldn’t – couldn’t – hear it.

He kissed her, tremulously, cupping his fingers around her jaw as if she might fade away. “Come to bed.” He told her, the words against her mouth. She let him pick her up as if she were a babe, let him wrap her in a towel and carry her into their bedroom. She saw it when he did; the untouched covers, the only evidence of life her gun on her nightstand. It looked as if no one had slept there in months, and when he set her down atop the covers his mouth was set in a tight line. “Aleks-”

She was still naked, and she let go of the towel to kiss him. It wasn’t hard to draw his hands to her body again, and though she knew it was wrong to avoid whatever he was going to say, she couldn’t bring herself to feel guilty. She had missed him so much.

His hands skated down her spine, and lifted her with two firm palms under her ass, and he threw her bodily up the mattress, dropping his own towel to press the length of his body against hers. She reached between them to wrap her fingers around his cock, stroking it hard enough to make him grunt. She worked him to fullness, before bucking her own hips to upseat him, reversing their positions.

He looked up at her, a little dazedly, and she licked a thin line from his pecs to his mouth just because she could. It made him pant and jump in her hand, and she straddled him quickly, sinking down on the full length of him. It hurt a little, feeling him so suddenly after so long, but she paid her discomfort no mind, focussed on drawing more delicious noises from her partner. She rode him hard, her already sore legs screaming for relief, but he was looking at her in wonder and letting out bitten off noises that made her gut curl in pleasure. Before long, he was meeting her halfway, thrusting up into her and clutching her hips hard enough to bruise. She leant over him, still undulating above him, and kissed him.

“Приди, моя милая.” Come for me, my sweet.

He groaned her name, and she felt him spill into her. He lay lax for a moment, panting and twitching inside of her, before he was up like a shot, eyes wide. “Did you-?” Aleks gently pulled his hands from her body, and got off him.

“I’m just going to clean up.” She told him, pressing him firmly into the mattress. He reached for again, and she phased out, pretending not to see his frown as his hands went through her.

Aleks shut the bathroom door behind herself, locking it, and leant against it. She just needed a moment to-

Ah, shit.

She wiped hurriedly at the tears spilling embarrassingly down her cheeks and met her own eyes in the mirror. She looked…small. Weak. Pale and tired looking, skin stretching too tight over her bones, eyes red and teary.

She couldn’t be seen like this.

By the time she had pulled herself together enough to be seen, it was dark in their bedroom.

Aleks tried not to let it hurt her.

Instead, she padded silently over to her side of the bed, and Phased between the covers. Her partner was turned away from her, the broad expanse of his back exposed to her. Her hand lingered between them for a moment, almost on his shoulder blade before her nerve failed her. Was she so weak? Did she have to ask him to hold her to keep the night at bay?

Aleks turned over on to her side, tugging her knees to her chest and breathing slowly through her nose. She did not like to think of HYDRA, nor did she ever reminisce with any semblance of wistfulness, but in that moment she thought almost fondly of the dreamless, chemical sleeps that she had once known.

Everything was still for a long moment, and Aleks was beginning to count the slow breaths of her partner, when he shifted beside her. She held very still as he turned over towards her, as his chest squashed gracelessly into her back, as his arm came snaking over her waist, anchoring her to him with his palm flat against her belly. This close, she could feel the pulse of his heart through her scapula.

“What’s wrong?”

He whispered it into the nape of her neck, tickling the short strands of hair there. Aleks didn’t move except to breathe, eyes wide and staring into the dark beyond. “Aleks? Are you awake?” they both listened for a long moment, before he sighed slightly. “I love you, you know?”

He didn’t speak again, but he didn’t relax his tight grip upon her, and Aleks closed her eyes and pretended they were in Paris again.

April 20^th, 2018

Wakanda, Africa

“Did you know that they eat it? For fun?” Wanda paused for a moment to hold a delicate hand over her mouth. Aleks smiled slightly. Wanda had a hidden melodrama to her, and it was always nice to see it come out when she was feeling particularly excited. “I can’t wait to try it.”

“I thought you were disgusted by it.” Aleks said mildly, hefting Wanda’s luggage over the threshold of her temporary rooms.

“Have you ever had it?” Wanda’s voice changed self-consciously to English, and Aleks turned to see T’Challa and Shuri standing at the end of the corridor, both in Royal garb – Shuri even in Wakandan sandals, so Aleks knew something was going on.

“Haggis? I have actually – but that was well before the FSS was formed, so I’m sure mine was quite different to what you’ll be having.” Aleks nodded at the two royals as they approached. “Good morning, Royal Highnesses.”

“Aleks…” Wanda hissed at her, and Aleks felt a nervous touch on her free hand. “We should stop and-”

“Aleksandrina, I hope that you have slept well. Miss Maximoff, it is good to see you in such high spirits.” T’Challa was as polite as ever, inclining his head in greeting. Wanda stuttered through a nervous response, almost folding into a bow before Aleks placed a calming hand on the nape of her neck. “Aleksandrina, I have a favour to ask of you.”

“Anything, Your Highness,” Aleks responded immediately. “Just as soon as I have seen Wanda on her way.”

“Aleks, you shouldn’t-” Wanda began in Sokovian, twisting her hands together.

Aleks patted her once on the shoulder. “She is my priority.” Wanda dropped her head, and Shuri grinned. Aleks shot the young Princess a wink. T’Challa half-smiled at the pair of them.

“Of course. It is a simple matter.” T’Challa bowed his head and stepped aside. Aleks steered Wanda past them, ignoring her whispered protests.

Wanda flicked a spark of red energy at her, searing into the exposed skin of her forearm. Aleks tutted absently, picking up the young woman’s duffle bag to balance it on her shoulder. “Do you have a toothbrush?”

“Yes.”

“Do you have the emergency card?”

“Yes! I know how to pack a bag!” Wanda groaned, and Aleks grinned at her, throwing her free arm around the girl’s shoulders and shaking her slightly.

“I am excited for you! Can you blame me?”

Wanda’s irritated face cracked slightly, a smile turning up the corners of her mouth. “No.” She bit her bottom lip, suddenly looking up at Aleks in concern. “Are you sure Steve is okay with this?”

Aleks shrugged. “No. But it isn’t his decision.” Wanda’s face fell, and Aleks squeezed her again. “If Steve had his way, all of us would be shut up in a house somewhere so he keep an eye on us at all times. You are an adult, and you should be free to make your own decisions. And I told you; Sam, James and I have your back on this.”

Steve had not been at all happy to hear about Wanda’s – as he called it – ridiculous idea to go and stay with Vision. Steve didn’t want Wanda to be shut up and powered down, but he wasn’t comfortable with the idea of her being so far away. Aleks knew part of it was guilt, but the main part was Steve’s incurable worry – he cared so deeply, and he liked to protect the people he considered under his wing. It was just a matter of expressing it – which he either struggled with or didn’t do at all.

“And Natasha?” Wanda worried at her lip again, eyes on their feet as they headed out to the landing platform.

“Natalia will come around once she sees you are abiding to the conditions.” Aleks waved to the Wakandan pilot sitting patiently in the cockpit. The pilot nodded in response, and the engines fired up with a low hum. They paused at the loading ramp, and Aleks handed over Wanda’s luggage. With a flitter of her fingers, red magic dancing around her fingertips, Wanda sent the bag floating inside the jet. Aleks watched the casual display of ability with the same muted awe she always did. Magic. It never got old.

“I’m going to miss you.” Wanda said suddenly, turning to look at her with a fierceness Aleks understood. She had come to care deeply for the broken girl before her. Wanda reminded her of herself; and Aleks wanted nothing more than for Wanda to experience a full and sweet life.

“And I you, little witch. Don’t forget to check in regularly.” Aleks lifted one arm, Wanda throwing both of her own around her neck and hugging her close. Aleks breathed in the sweet-paprika scent that seemed to hang around the other woman, and stroked a hand over her hair.

“You should tell him how you feel.” Wanda said, speaking into the crook of her neck. “You should tell him you miss him.”

Aleks wet her lips slowly, staring up at the bright blue sky. “I can’t burden him with that.”

Wanda stepped back, brow creased. “He will never see you as a burden.” Aleks didn’t know what to say in return. Wanda smiled slightly. “I will speak to you soon!” With one last wave, she ascended into the aircraft.  

Aleks stood on the landing pad and watched the jet disappear into the distance, until it vanished entirely as it passed through the invisibility field. Footsteps behind her made her turn to see Okoye. The tall woman had her eternal glare on, but Aleks thought she knew the impenetrable woman well enough to recognise a hint of warmth on her features. “General.” Aleks greeted, bowing her head to the other woman.

Okoye inclined her head in greeting. “The King and Princess have been requested at a peace summit in Norway.”

“Am I playing the invisible bodyguard again?” Aleks asked, already imagining the strain of such a mission.

“The Queen Mother and I would feel more comfortable if you did, yes.” Okoye never beat around the bush, something Aleks appreciated immensely. “We leave in an hour.”

Aleks nodded again. She had meant what she said; she would do anything for the Royal Family that permitted her sanctuary. It would be a tedious and tiring trip, but she would do worse if they asked. Perhaps she could ask if her partner could-

No.

He was in cyro again. For the last time – as he had excitedly proclaimed early on Monday. He had said the same thing enough times that Aleks had given up hoping.