Now That You're Gone
It wasn’t as easy as that, of course. Peter still had to persuade Aunt May which was an impossible feat in itself, but she must’ve seen the desperation burning in his eyes because a reluctant, “Don’t make me regret this, Petey” came a week later. It was easier to convince Ned and MJ, but Peter carried a different kind of pain setting off without them and realising his foreseeable future would be with virtual strangers.
But to Peter’s surprise, the three years spent with Quill’s team seemed to pass faster than the one he spent alone. In all fairness, there wasn’t much time to brood or think about what could have been like there had been before, not with the constant intergalactic threats and chaos of Starlord’s team which left Peter without a moment’s peace.
Tony only tried to contact Peter once. Two weeks after embarking onto The Milano, he received a frantic voice message from inside the suit asking where the hell Peter had gone. Somehow, he managed to reply that Quill had taken him on -temporarily, but Tony didn’t need to know that- and promptly switched off communications. He knew that Mr Stark could override it and figure out a way to contact him further if he cared enough, but there was nothing apart from radio silence for the next couple of years. It was probably for the best, considering Peter’s feelings hadn’t faded nearly as much as he’d hoped. He winced to think what would’ve happened if Peter had joined the Avengers and spent every waking minute with the man.
While Peter’s attachment didn’t change, he definitely learnt to hide it better, though at the start there was a blush for every mention of Tony’s name. Gamora reminded him painfully of MJ and her uncanny perception of Peter’s feelings, but she’d been the one to push him out of his comfort zone and encourage him to get to know some surprisingly attractive- aliens? Non-earth beings? Whatever the case, Peter let go of the hope he was clinging onto and lost his virginity to a gold-skinned man with a wicked smirk uncannily similar to someone Peter was resolutely not thinking about. Wylaz didn’t make false promises or stop him from diving headfirst into life-threatening fights, which was definitely an improvement. But he did give Peter a bracelet with a cheeky wink to hit him up if a hook-up or interesting fight was on the cards.
And thus began the next few years of sometimes thrilling, sometimes entertaining, always dangerous escapades with the Guardians. Peter’s suit underwent changes almost as many times as months he’d been there, thanks to Rocket or various space engineers they met along the way, and with it, Peter changed too. He didn’t lose his sense of morality nor the reasons he was fighting for, but realised that nothing was black-and-white and people lived in changeable shades of grey. Slowly, painfully slowly, Peter began to understand what it was like to be part of a team- and dare he say it- family- though he knew it wasn’t made to last. Peter had Aunt May and people he loved waiting for him back home, but when the Guardians stopped off again at Earth, he felt like he could finally breathe.
Dr Strange had asked the Guardians to retrieve a rare form of glass, and though Strange could easily appear on the spaceship, Gamora had subtly hinted they should meet him back on Earth. Though the days where Peter felt that isolation was swallowing him whole were light years away, it didn’t stop the nerves creeping down his spine and the nausea that rose in his mouth once they touched down outside the Avengers Compound. To anyone else it would’ve been unnoticeable, but he’d trained alongside and in many ways grown up with Quill’s team. Rocket kept tinkering with his suit in his weird way of showing support, and Drax had a hand on his shoulder when they stepped out of the spaceship.
Fuck- get it together Peter, he chided to himself as a slight tremor started in his hands.
The sunlight blinded him momentarily as they stepped out of The Milano so Peter had to blink a few times to see the gathering in front of him. His heart lurched at the sight of sunglasses and an AC/DC shirt, but he pushed it down and plastered on a neutral smile. Surprisingly, Bruce was the first to come forward and wrap Peter in a crushing hug, before passing him around for a hug or pat on the back by the others. Distantly, he could hear the Guardians greet and joking around with some Avengers that he’d seen and until now not met formally. A heavy mix of emotions felt ready to overwhelm Peter and he felt like he was balancing on a knife-edge as the familiar aftershave of Tony Tony Tony came closer. Peter felt a reassuring hand on his back from Gamora as he turned to face To-Mr Stark, who had an unreadable expression on his face.
“Good to see you kid. Though when I said to keep out of danger, I didn’t mean go to space and find it there”, Mr Stark joked, his eyes flicking imperceptibly to Gamora’s hand behind his sunglasses. Peter let out a nervous chuckle and tried to find something-anything- to say, but thankfully was saved by Clint pushing his way forward and whooping loudly.
“Damn Pete, you’ve grown up! When the hell did that happen?”
As the tension bled out of his shoulders, Peter realised how much of it he’d been carrying. The pressure he’d placed on this meeting to get the Avengers to notice and see how much he’d changed suddenly seemed to fall away. They were acting like any other time Peter had been at the compound and it weirdly made his chest feel ten times lighter. There was nothing to prove, except maybe to- no, not thinking about that.
As the group made their way into the compound Peter lost sight of Mr Stark and was quickly bombarded with questions from Clint about what he’d been up to in space. Steve kindly showed him to his room- Peter didn’t even know he had a room at the compound- and finally there was quiet. The momentary relief lasted all of 5 minutes before Peter noticed an undercurrent of adrenaline that was making him twitchy and agitated.
“F.R.I.D.A.Y.? Could you please tell me where Quill and the others are staying?”
A gentle voice answered, “Of course Peter Parker. They are staying on Floor 3, which is four floors beneath yours. The elevator is to your left and opposite the kitchen.”
Peter thanked her and made his way to the living room in Floor 3, where Quill was trying to cook something probably inedible for Gamora. Peter felt something inside him settle and sat down sideways on the couch to kick his feet up against Drax. He smiled slightly and soon drifted off to Rocket and Groot bickering over the TV.